--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: This was the affair which had ended…" description: "\"“This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently, without fuss or scenes or hysteria. When you were nineteen, and it was the first time you ha..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png" --- # This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently… ![“This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently, without fuss or scenes or hysteria. When you were nineteen, and it was the first time you had been let down, you did not make scenes. You felt as if your back was broken, as if you would never move again. But you did not make a scene. That…” quote by Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png) > ““This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently, without fuss or scenes or hysteria. When you were nineteen, and it was the first time you had been let down, you did not make scenes. You felt as if your back was broken, as if you would never move again. But you did not make a scene. That started later on, when the same thing had happened five or six times over, and you were supposed to be getting used to it.”” [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Repeated disappointment can become normalized, but early heartbreak leaves deep, lingering pain. **In simple terms:** Early hurts stay hidden but affect later reactions. Key Takeaway Recognize and address early hurts before they accumulate. Themes heartbreak resilience normalization Mood reflective somber Type narrative emotional When to use this quote - relationships - career setbacks - personal growth - mental health - support seeking Key Concepts psychology emotional trauma coping mechanisms Questions to Reflect On - How have early disappointments shaped your current responses? - What steps can you take to heal past hurts? A Different Perspective Ignoring early pain can lead to chronic emotional numbness. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Affair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affair/) ## Related quotes > [I've done five films directed by women. I did like it. They had qualities, particularly in the romantic tenderness of scenes. I felt sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacqueline-bisset/i-ve-done-five-films-directed-by-women-i-did-like-it-they-had/) [Jacqueline Bisset](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacqueline-bisset/) > [“Lewandowski and Hope Hicks, the PR aide put on the campaign by Ivanka Trump, had an affair that ended in a public fight on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-wolff/lewandowski-and-hope-hicks-the-pr-aide-put-on-the-campaign-by-ivanka/) [Michael Wolff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-wolff/) > [“When in 1930 Maniu and his friends called Carol back, it was on one condition—that Lupescu stay abroad and that the affair be ended…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-g-waldeck/when-in-1930-maniu-and-his-friends-called-carol-back-it-was-on-one/) [R.G. Waldeck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-g-waldeck/) > [I think people are getting more and more comfortable - watching content at home is blurring that line, because people are getting used to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-scott/i-think-people-are-getting-more-and-more-comfortable-watching-content/) [Adam Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-scott/) > ['Adrift With Geoff Lloyd and Annabel Port' features Absolute Radio escapee Geoff and erstwhile colleague Annabel doing something similar. All are appealing individuals with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-hepworth/adrift-with-geoff-lloyd-and-annabel-port-features-absolute-radio/) [David Hepworth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-hepworth/) > [I recently have had a full hip replacement and a liver transplant, and I'm getting used to the medication.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evel-knievel/i-recently-have-had-a-full-hip-replacement-and-a-liver-transplant-and/) [Evel Knievel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evel-knievel/) > [“In this country, you look at a person, and you know them. It is the inside-out way the people of this country wear their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maxine-beneba-clarke/in-this-country-you-look-at-a-person-and-you-know-them-it-is-the/) Maxine Beneba Clarke > [The sound was my greatest concern. There were certain difficulties getting used to the way every musician can hear his or herself, the way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-sound-was-my-greatest-concern-there-were-certain-difficulties/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Different directors have different things, so when I left Mike Leigh, as it were, and I went into other projects after 'All or Nothing,'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sally-hawkins/different-directors-have-different-things-so-when-i-left-mike-leigh/) [Sally Hawkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sally-hawkins/) > [One of the things I had a hard time getting used to when I came to California in '78 was Santa Claus in shorts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dennis-franz/one-of-the-things-i-had-a-hard-time-getting-used-to-when-i-came-to/) [Dennis Franz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dennis-franz/) > [Get used to me, I am not getting used to anyone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frantz-fanon/get-used-to-me-i-am-not-getting-used-to-anyone/) [Frantz Fanon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frantz-fanon/) > [I like the communication and trust that comes from a long-term relationship. When you really know people as musicians and as people, you feel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-liebman/i-like-the-communication-and-trust-that-comes-from-a-long-term/) [Dave Liebman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-liebman/) > [To be disappointed too much that I think I'm getting used to being let down.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/to-be-disappointed-too-much-that-i-think-i-m-getting-used-to-being/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“It’s just taking some getting used to. The snarling, the hissing, the purring. Then I have to deal with it from the baby….” “Ha,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shelly-laurenston/it-s-just-taking-some-getting-used-to-the-snarling-the-hissing-the/) [Shelly Laurenston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shelly-laurenston/) > [Hollywood is so fixated on keeping it that way because it's generating the buzz, but that representation isn't right. I definitely feel like it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-boyega/hollywood-is-so-fixated-on-keeping-it-that-way-because-it-s/) [John Boyega](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-boyega/) ## More by Jean Rhys > [Of course she had some pathetic illusions about herself or she would not be able to go on living.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/of-course-she-had-some-pathetic-illusions-about-herself-or-she-would/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [As soon as I turned the key I saw it hanging, the color of fire and sunset. the colour of flamboyant flowers. ‘If you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/as-soon-as-i-turned-the-key-i-saw-it-hanging-the-color-of-fire-and/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [Human beings are struggling, and so they are egoists. But it's wrong to say that they are wholy cruel - it's a deformed view.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/human-beings-are-struggling-and-so-they-are-egoists-but-it-s-wrong-to/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“THe room was large and low-ceilinged, the striped wallpaper faded to inoffensiveness. A huge dark wardrobe faced a huge dark bed. The rest of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/the-room-was-large-and-low-ceilinged-the-striped-wallpaper-faded-to/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [There is no doubt that running away on a fresh, blue morning can be exhilarating.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/there-is-no-doubt-that-running-away-on-a-fresh-blue-morning-can-be/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [Blot out the moon, Pull down the stars. Love in the dark, for we're for the dark So soon, so soon.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/blot-out-the-moon-pull-down-the-stars-love-in-the-dark-for-we-re-for/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“But in the daytime it was all right. And when you'd had a drink you knew it was the best way to live in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/but-in-the-daytime-it-was-all-right-and-when-you-d-had-a-drink-you/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [She’ll have no lover, for I don’t want her and she’ll see no other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/she-ll-have-no-lover-for-i-don-t-want-her-and-she-ll-see-no-other/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [Everything tender and melancholy - as life is sometimes, just for one moment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/everything-tender-and-melancholy-as-life-is-sometimes-just-for-one/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“have spunks and do battle for yourself”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/have-spunks-and-do-battle-for-yourself/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“You are walking along a road peacefully. You trip. You fall into blackness. That's the past - or perhaps the future. And you know…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/you-are-walking-along-a-road-peacefully-you-trip-you-fall-into/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“She spent the foggy day in endless, aimless walking, for it seemed to her that if she moved quickly enough she would escape the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/she-spent-the-foggy-day-in-endless-aimless-walking-for-it-seemed-to/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [But they never last, the golden days. And it can be sad, the sun in the afternoon, can't it? Yes, it can be sad,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/but-they-never-last-the-golden-days-and-it-can-be-sad-the-sun-in-the/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [She could give herself up to the written word as naturally as a good dancer to music or a fine swimmer to water. The…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/she-could-give-herself-up-to-the-written-word-as-naturally-as-a-good/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) > [“There is no control over memory.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/there-is-no-control-over-memory/) [Jean Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) [Explore all 165 Jean Rhys quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/) ## More Affair quotes > [Histories never conclude; they just pause their prose. Their stories are, if they are truthful, untidy affairs, resistant to windings-up and sortings-out. They beat…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simon-schama/histories-never-conclude-they-just-pause-their-prose-their-stories/) [Simon Schama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simon-schama/) > [Islam never differentiates between men and women as regards political rights and puts them on an equal footing. However, even if a woman is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yusuf-al-qaradawi/islam-never-differentiates-between-men-and-women-as-regards-political/) [Yusuf al-Qaradawi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yusuf-al-qaradawi/) > [Our guiding principle was that design is neither an intellectual nor a material affair, but simply an integral part of the stuff of life,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walter-gropius/our-guiding-principle-was-that-design-is-neither-an-intellectual-nor/) [Walter Gropius](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walter-gropius/) > [I wonder if it's possible to have a love affair that lasts forever.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-warhol/i-wonder-if-it-s-possible-to-have-a-love-affair-that-lasts-forever/) [Andy Warhol](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-warhol/) > [For a young man to start his career with a love affair with an older woman was quite de rigueur ... Of course, it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vita-sackville-west/for-a-young-man-to-start-his-career-with-a-love-affair-with-an-older/) [Vita Sackville-West](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vita-sackville-west/) > [As long as the state permits itself to interfere in the affairs of literature, literature has the right to interfere with the affairs of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-brodsky/as-long-as-the-state-permits-itself-to-interfere-in-the-affairs-of/) [Joseph Brodsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-brodsky/) > [Love is mainly an affair of short spasms. If these spasms disappoint us, love dies. It is very seldom that it weathers the experience…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-cocteau/love-is-mainly-an-affair-of-short-spasms-if-these-spasms-disappoint/) [Jean Cocteau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-cocteau/) > [The Fundamental Principle that governs - or ought to govern -human affairs if we wish to avoid misunderstandings, conflicts, or pointless utopias, is negotiation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/umberto-eco/the-fundamental-principle-that-governs-or-ought-to-govern-human/) [Umberto Eco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/umberto-eco/) > [My hope does not rest in the affairs of this world. It rests in Christ who is coming again.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/billy-graham/my-hope-does-not-rest-in-the-affairs-of-this-world-it-rests-in-christ/) [Billy Graham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/billy-graham/) > [In 1953, the United States played a significant role in orchestrating the overthrow of Iran's popular prime minister, Mohammed Mossadegh. The Eisenhower administration believed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/madeleine-albright/in-1953-the-united-states-played-a-significant-role-in-orchestrating/) [Madeleine Albright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/madeleine-albright/) > [Not everyone likes the stable, gradual rise of our country. There are some who are using the democratic ideology to interfere in our internal…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vladimir-putin/not-everyone-likes-the-stable-gradual-rise-of-our-country-there-are/) [Vladimir Putin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vladimir-putin/) > [The archives recall not one single incriminating incident, not one drunken escapade, not one reported affair, not one spat with a team-mate or reporter…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-atherton/the-archives-recall-not-one-single-incriminating-incident-not-one/) Michael Atherton > [“I ripped the sketch from the wall. "Liar." Edward looked more ravaged than usual. "That is a terrible word, coming from you." "Yup." "And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-jensen/i-ripped-the-sketch-from-the-wall-liar-edward-looked-more-ravaged/) [Melissa Jensen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-jensen/) > [For some people, a one-night stand doesn't make any difference in a seven-year love affair. I don't believe the degree of betrayal is always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/for-some-people-a-one-night-stand-doesn-t-make-any-difference-in-a/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [And what is literature, Rabo," he said, "but an insider's newsletter about affairs relating to molecules, of no importance to anything in the universe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/and-what-is-literature-rabo-he-said-but-an-insider-s-newsletter-about/) [Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/) [Browse all 2,218 Affair quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affair/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently, without fuss or scenes or hysteria. When you were nineteen, and it was the first time you had been let down, you did not make scenes. You felt as if your back was broken, as if you would never move again. But you did not make a scene. That started later on, when the same thing had happened five or six times over, and you were supposed to be getting used to it.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jean Rhys" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quietly-and-decently-without-fuss/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Affair" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quietly-and-decently-without-fuss/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/jean-rhys-2447_affair_this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quie_3060564.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“This was the affair which had ended quietly and decently, without fuss or scenes or hysteria. When you were…” — Jean Rhys", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jean Rhys", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-rhys/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“This was the affair which had...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quietly-and-decently-without-fuss/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-rhys/this-was-the-affair-which-had-ended-quietly-and-decently-without-fuss/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```