--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle…" description: "\"“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.”\" — Jarod Kintz" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg" --- # I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything… ![“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.” quote by Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg) > ““I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.”” [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Humor can arise from absurd safety warnings about everyday objects. **In simple terms:** Funny warnings highlight absurdity. Key Takeaway Use humor to defuse tension. Themes comedy absurdity self‑deprecation safety Mood playful lighthearted Type entertaining satirical When to use this quote - stand‑up - writing - media production Key Concepts social commentary satire Questions to Reflect On - When is humor appropriate? - How to balance wit and responsibility? A Different Perspective Jokes may trivialize real safety concerns. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet ## Related quotes > [“Next to a corpus of which the critic ‘has not retained intact a single fragment’,5 he reintroduces the body, including his own penis.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beno-t-peeters/next-to-a-corpus-of-which-the-critic-has-not-retained-intact-a-single/) [Benoît Peeters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beno-t-peeters/) > [“As a writer, I need more exposure. I think I’ll take off my pants. Would you mind if I kept my penis warm in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/as-a-writer-i-need-more-exposure-i-think-i-ll-take-off-my-pants-would/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I should make a tongue condom shaped like an oven mitt, so my mouth’s spoken language muscle is protected from hot coffee.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-should-make-a-tongue-condom-shaped-like-an-oven-mitt-so-my-mouth-s/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“You won’t ever catch me wearing an oven mitt, because what’s wrong with a regular condom? If I’m wearing an oven mitt, I’m too…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/you-won-t-ever-catch-me-wearing-an-oven-mitt-because-what-s-wrong/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I’d like to assess all the asses on the beach. By hand. I should try to get a sponsorship from an oven mitt manufacturer.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-d-like-to-assess-all-the-asses-on-the-beach-by-hand-i-should-try-to/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“If you’re going to hold a grudge, at least put on an oven mitt before you pick it up.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/if-you-re-going-to-hold-a-grudge-at-least-put-on-an-oven-mitt-before/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“It was as unsatisfying as a handjob from someone wearing an oven mitt.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-di-filippo/it-was-as-unsatisfying-as-a-handjob-from-someone-wearing-an-oven-mitt/) [Paul Di Filippo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-di-filippo/) > [“when Suri's eyes tear and she steps over, closer to me, fiddling with the oven mitt and meeting my”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ella-james/when-suri-s-eyes-tear-and-she-steps-over-closer-to-me-fiddling-with/) [Ella James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ella-james/) > [“closer to me, fiddling with the oven mitt and meeting”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ella-james/closer-to-me-fiddling-with-the-oven-mitt-and-meeting/) [Ella James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ella-james/) > [“I am the chef of love. Let me utilize your oven.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-am-the-chef-of-love-let-me-utilize-your-oven/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I make love sensually, and without the aid of a fancy recipe. I just open the box, add water, stir a bit, and pop…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-make-love-sensually-and-without-the-aid-of-a-fancy-recipe-i-just/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [The oven became hotter and hotter, and Hansel began to sweat. Then a delicious smell wafted to his nostrils. Oh no! he thought. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-gidwitz/the-oven-became-hotter-and-hotter-and-hansel-began-to-sweat-then-a/) [Adam Gidwitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-gidwitz/) > [“When one of us (children) caught measles or whooping cough and we were isolated in bad upstairs, we wrote notes to each other perhaps…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eudora-welty/when-one-of-us-children-caught-measles-or-whooping-cough-and-we-were/) [Eudora Welty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eudora-welty/) > [Rhythm, that's an essential part of cooking. The sound of a lovely song and the smell of some dish in the oven are equally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neneh-cherry/rhythm-that-s-an-essential-part-of-cooking-the-sound-of-a-lovely-song/) [Neneh Cherry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neneh-cherry/) > [Always bake in the center of the oven. A pan placed too close to the bottom of the oven will receive more heat radiating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-saffitz/always-bake-in-the-center-of-the-oven-a-pan-placed-too-close-to-the/) [Claire Saffitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claire-saffitz/) ## More by Jarod Kintz > [“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-notice-when-you-re-gone-or-do-i-how-can-i-observe-something-that/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I wouldn’t love you if you were the last Sodomite in Gomorrah.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-wouldn-t-love-you-if-you-were-the-last-sodomite-in-gomorrah/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/a-blanket-could-be-used-to-make-sweet-sweet-music-with-the-love-of/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/a-brick-could-be-used-to-slow-down-time-sort-of-like-a-camel-in-a/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/we-have-a-love-so-pure-that-it-makes-snow-seem-yellow-don-t-eat-it/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-hid-mrs-frozenwater-s-body-in-the-ice-cube-trays-in-my-freezer/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/two-similar-words-might-lead-to-two-similar-ideas-they-might-also/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/nothing-is-and-isn-t-nothing-is-and-isn-t-nothing-itself-is-and-at/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“Embossed letters represent the topography of typography.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/embossed-letters-represent-the-topography-of-typography/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/there-s-only-one-piece-of-clothing-i-could-eat-fast-and-that-s-a-scarf/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/dora-j-arod-is-to-jarod-ora-as-yes-is-to-yes-yes-is-also-the-correct/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/the-best-part-about-being-kidnapped-is-being-blindfolded-and-getting/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“Orafoura once told me that if I were a car, I’d be a Ferrari. One that was scratched smashed, rusted, and stolen.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/orafoura-once-told-me-that-if-i-were-a-car-i-d-be-a-ferrari-one-that/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“What makes a good leader? I ask myself this every day, and then as I begin to list off characteristics I realize I’m describing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/what-makes-a-good-leader-i-ask-myself-this-every-day-and-then-as-i/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“I’d like to file a missing person’s report—on my clone. It’s nearly 2012. He should have been here by now.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-d-like-to-file-a-missing-person-s-report-on-my-clone-it-s-nearly/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) [Explore all 6,921 Jarod Kintz quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) ## More Oven quotes > [Always bake in the center of the oven. A pan placed too close to the bottom of the oven will receive more heat radiating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-saffitz/always-bake-in-the-center-of-the-oven-a-pan-placed-too-close-to-the/) [Claire Saffitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claire-saffitz/) > [Rhythm, that's an essential part of cooking. The sound of a lovely song and the smell of some dish in the oven are equally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neneh-cherry/rhythm-that-s-an-essential-part-of-cooking-the-sound-of-a-lovely-song/) [Neneh Cherry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neneh-cherry/) > [“I make love sensually, and without the aid of a fancy recipe. I just open the box, add water, stir a bit, and pop…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-make-love-sensually-and-without-the-aid-of-a-fancy-recipe-i-just/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“When one of us (children) caught measles or whooping cough and we were isolated in bad upstairs, we wrote notes to each other perhaps…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eudora-welty/when-one-of-us-children-caught-measles-or-whooping-cough-and-we-were/) [Eudora Welty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eudora-welty/) > [The oven became hotter and hotter, and Hansel began to sweat. Then a delicious smell wafted to his nostrils. Oh no! he thought. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-gidwitz/the-oven-became-hotter-and-hotter-and-hansel-began-to-sweat-then-a/) [Adam Gidwitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-gidwitz/) > [“There were a thousand noises: spoons clattering, liquid being poured in glugs, a deep, unctuous bubbling from the stove. Heat blasted him in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-madeleine/there-were-a-thousand-noises-spoons-clattering-liquid-being-poured-in/) [Laura Madeleine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-madeleine/) > [“Baking was a science, precise, just mix it all together and let the oven do the work. But actually cooking, she couldn’t cook a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allie-burke/baking-was-a-science-precise-just-mix-it-all-together-and-let-the/) [Allie Burke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allie-burke/) > [Take me out the oven that is life, I am so done.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-binstead/take-me-out-the-oven-that-is-life-i-am-so-done/) Jack Binstead > [For years, I stored my sweaters in the oven.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lesley-visser/for-years-i-stored-my-sweaters-in-the-oven/) [Lesley Visser](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lesley-visser/) > [Down in the dump cell, where I can't take no smell. It's like a oven baking for 2 thousand years. When the morning comes,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/black-uhuru/down-in-the-dump-cell-where-i-can-t-take-no-smell-it-s-like-a-oven/) [Black Uhuru](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/black-uhuru/) > [“Dropped a blueberry Under the oven it rolls Goodbye, forever”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/asa-akira/dropped-a-blueberry-under-the-oven-it-rolls-goodbye-forever/) [Asa Akira](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/asa-akira/) > [How many times have you been watching an episode of 'South Park' and thought, 'I'd like to be able to watch this on my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trey-parker/how-many-times-have-you-been-watching-an-episode-of-south-park-and/) [Trey Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trey-parker/) > [“But the kitchen will not come into its own again until it ceases to be a status symbol and becomes again a workshop. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-mcginley/but-the-kitchen-will-not-come-into-its-own-again-until-it-ceases-to/) [Phyllis McGinley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-mcginley/) > [“My girl has got a bun in her oven, and I guess you know who did the damn cooking.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/my-girl-has-got-a-bun-in-her-oven-and-i-guess-you-know-who-did-the/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [If you throw a lamb chop in the oven, what's to keep it from getting done?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-crawford/if-you-throw-a-lamb-chop-in-the-oven-what-s-to-keep-it-from-getting/) [Joan Crawford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-crawford/) Browse all 109 Oven quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jarod Kintz" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle-anything-hot-including-my/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Oven" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle-anything-hot-including-my/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/690/jarod-kintz-2_oven_i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle_2824352.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I’ll put an oven mitt on before I handle anything hot—including my penis.” — Jarod Kintz", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jarod Kintz", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“I’ll put an oven mitt on...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle-anything-hot-including-my/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-ll-put-an-oven-mitt-on-before-i-handle-anything-hot-including-my/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```