--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet…" description: "\"I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.\" — Ja..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg" --- # I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman… ![“I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.” quote by Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg) > “I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.” [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. She advises women to refuse men they doubt, emphasizing self‑respect and caution in romantic choices. **In simple terms:** Trust intuition in love. Key Takeaway Listen to doubts. Themes love self‑respect choice Mood cautious empowering Type advice When to use this quote - Dating - marriage proposals - friendship boundaries Key Concepts Autonomy gender norms Questions to Reflect On - How to discern doubt from fear? - What are healthy criteria for acceptance? A Different Perspective Rigid refusal may miss genuine connections. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Doubt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/doubt/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) ## Related quotes > [“If a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/if-a-woman-doubts-as-to-whether-she-should-accept-a-man-or-not-she-2/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [“I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet-that-if-a-woman-doubts-as-to-2/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him. If she can hesitate…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/if-a-woman-doubts-as-to-whether-she-should-accept-a-man-or-not-she/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [An honest man is not accountable for the vice and folly of his trade, and therefore ought not to refuse the exercise of it.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michel-de-montaigne/an-honest-man-is-not-accountable-for-the-vice-and-folly-of-his-trade/) [Michel de Montaigne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michel-de-montaigne/) > [I release all fears and doubts. I accept myself and create peace in my mind and heart. I now choose to free myself from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-hay/i-release-all-fears-and-doubts-i-accept-myself-and-create-peace-in-my/) [Louise Hay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-hay/) > [“There is such a freedom being able to sit still … with yourself, your questions, thoughts, dreams and doubts. Can you accept who you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brittany-burgunder/there-is-such-a-freedom-being-able-to-sit-still-with-yourself-your/) [Brittany Burgunder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brittany-burgunder/) > [“You can't be yourself unless you accept the man in the mirror”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thabiso-monkoe/you-can-t-be-yourself-unless-you-accept-the-man-in-the-mirror/) [Thabiso Monkoe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thabiso-monkoe/) > [“Beautiful look at me. If you accept me as your man, you will not be an object nor will I take you for granted.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ndr-jnr/beautiful-look-at-me-if-you-accept-me-as-your-man-you-will-not-be-an/) Ndr.jnr > [It is a Mormon truism that is current among us and we all accept it, that as man is God once was and as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melvin-j-ballard/it-is-a-mormon-truism-that-is-current-among-us-and-we-all-accept-it/) [Melvin J. 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and Elizabeth suspected herself to be the first creature who had ever dared…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/lady-catherine-seemed-quite-astonished-at-not-receiving-a-direct/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [“He had suffered, and he had learnt to think, two advantages that he had never known before…”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/he-had-suffered-and-he-had-learnt-to-think-two-advantages-that-he-had/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [“Vanity was the beginning and the end of Sir Walter Eliot's character; vanity of person and of situation.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/vanity-was-the-beginning-and-the-end-of-sir-walter-eliot-s-character/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) [Explore all 2,013 Jane Austen quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) ## More Accepting quotes > [From Augustine down, theologians have tried to compel people to accept their special interpretation of the Scripture, and the tortures of the inquisition, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matilda-joslyn-gage/from-augustine-down-theologians-have-tried-to-compel-people-to-accept/) [Matilda Joslyn Gage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matilda-joslyn-gage/) > [Laughing, laughing, laughing, laughing! It is the jester! A voice from the Void, to cheer poor Cicero! I accept your gift, dearest Night Mother.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcus-tullius-cicero/laughing-laughing-laughing-laughing-it-is-the-jester-a-voice-from-the/) [Marcus Tullius Cicero](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcus-tullius-cicero/) > [This duo inside of me causes the perfect opportunity to live and learn twice as fast as those who choose to accept simplicity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tupac-shakur/this-duo-inside-of-me-causes-the-perfect-opportunity-to-live-and/) [Tupac Shakur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tupac-shakur/) > [There is something about the South that accepts the supernatural. If you don't accept it and you're having a conversation with someone who does,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-englert/there-is-something-about-the-south-that-accepts-the-supernatural-if/) [Alice Englert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-englert/) > [We only enter into the full life if our faith gives thanks. Because how else do we accept His free gift of salvation if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ann-voskamp/we-only-enter-into-the-full-life-if-our-faith-gives-thanks-because/) [Ann Voskamp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ann-voskamp/) > [Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/don-t-be-bitter-everybody-suffers-if-you-can-accept-your-suffering/) [Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/) > [It takes an unusually philosophic mind to accept that all one’s suffering might be to no end, really, in the larger scheme of things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-takes-an-unusually-philosophic-mind-to-accept-that-all-one-s/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [No nation being under another nation can accept gifts, and kick at the responsibility attached to those gifts, imposed by the conquering nation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mahatma-gandhi/no-nation-being-under-another-nation-can-accept-gifts-and-kick-at-the/) [Mahatma Gandhi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mahatma-gandhi/) > [Even with clothing naked animals, there were people who wanted to send in money. A woman in Santa Barbara, California, sent a $40,000 check.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-abel/even-with-clothing-naked-animals-there-were-people-who-wanted-to-send/) [Alan Abel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-abel/) > [Society understands the architecture of academia and knows there are relevant qualifications in different fields, and the media accepts the idea of specialisations and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-griffiths/society-understands-the-architecture-of-academia-and-knows-there-are/) [Jay Griffiths](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-griffiths/) > [Whatever your conscious mind assumes and believes to be true, your subconscious mind will accept and bring to pass. 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I totally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pirjo-honkasalo/as-my-films-are-born-at-the-moment-when-they-are-reflected-into/) [Pirjo Honkasalo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pirjo-honkasalo/) Browse all 6,788 Accepting quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jane Austen" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet-that-if-a-woman-doubts-as-to/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Accepting" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet-that-if-a-woman-doubts-as-to/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/12a/jane-austen-39_accepting_i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet_1894386.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I lay it down as a general rule, Harriet, that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or…” — Jane Austen", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jane Austen", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I lay it down as a...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet-that-if-a-woman-doubts-as-to/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/i-lay-it-down-as-a-general-rule-harriet-that-if-a-woman-doubts-as-to/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```