---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: There's a quote that I learned in college…"
description: "\"There's a quote that I learned in college a million years ago. \"Happy, thought I, is the man who can, in one and the same embrace, hold both his love a..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg"
---

#  There's a quote that I learned in college a million years…

![“There's a quote that I learned in college a million years ago. &quot;Happy, thought I, is the man who can, in one and the same embrace, hold both his love and the object of his love.&quot; Holding the feeling that you have and all the images that you've got and all the fantasies and romantic associations…” quote by Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg)

> “There's a quote that I learned in college a million years ago. "Happy, thought I, is the man who can, in one and the same embrace, hold both his love and the object of his love." Holding the feeling that you have and all the images that you've got and all the fantasies and romantic associations while also holding the actual core person that's been saddled with all of this.”

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

True love involves embracing both the idealized fantasies and the real person, integrating imagination with reality.

**In simple terms:** Love blends imagination with the actual partner.

Key Takeaway

Balance ideal and reality in relationships.

Themes

love idealization reality intimacy psychology

Mood

thoughtful introspective

Type

philosophical inspirational

When to use this quote

- relationships
- personal growth
- creative writing

Key Concepts

self-concept attachment theory cognitive dissonance

Questions to Reflect On

- Do you hold onto idealized images?
- How can you honor both imagination and the real person?

A Different Perspective

Balancing fantasy with reality can be emotionally taxing.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[College](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/college/) [Fantasy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fantasy/) [Feelings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feelings/) [Happy thoughts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happy-thoughts/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/)

## Related quotes

> [One of the most Beautiful Things... is Falling Asleep with Someone you Love... Holding them and Feeling Perfectly Safe...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/one-of-the-most-beautiful-things-is-falling-asleep-with-someone-you/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [I can embrace myself, hold my own hand, love me - but I can't gaze into my own eyes and feel my own soul…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-can-embrace-myself-hold-my-own-hand-love-me-but-i-can-t-gaze-into/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Sometimes dodging the curve balls that life brings sounds better than taking the next move. Everything happens for a reason; it makes us who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olga-garcia/sometimes-dodging-the-curve-balls-that-life-brings-sounds-better-than/)

Olga Garcia

> [Time and distance don't mean anything when I know we will embrace and hold each other again](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/time-and-distance-don-t-mean-anything-when-i-know-we-will-embrace-and/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Holding on to what I'm feeling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/flyleaf/holding-on-to-what-i-m-feeling/)

[Flyleaf](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/flyleaf/)

> [How? and Why? -------------- Funny how the past always after you You know it's gonna kill you Miserable your days and nights Depress you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r/how-and-why-funny-how-the-past-always-after-you-you-know-it-s-gonna/)

R

> [“For a moment I held the box, holding onto the feeling of anticipation as I tried to imagine what was inside. I didn’t expect…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amra-pajalic/for-a-moment-i-held-the-box-holding-onto-the-feeling-of-anticipation/)

Amra Pajalic

> [It's cute how I used to think this 'barely holding it together' feeling was temporary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-kendrick/it-s-cute-how-i-used-to-think-this-barely-holding-it-together-feeling/)

[Anna Kendrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-kendrick/)

> [Theres no use holding on to a feeling thats already dead If she belongs to someone else now then let it be that way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/theres-no-use-holding-on-to-a-feeling-thats-already-dead-if-she/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Love's more than holding hands and going to dances. It's two people who struggle to live, even when they should maybe both be dead.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shaun-hutchinson/love-s-more-than-holding-hands-and-going-to-dances-it-s-two-people/)

Shaun Hutchinson

> [If you are waiting for anything in order to live and love without holding back, then you suffer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-deida/if-you-are-waiting-for-anything-in-order-to-live-and-love-without/)

[David Deida](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-deida/)

> [When real love is holding 2 people together nothing can break them up.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sonya-parker/when-real-love-is-holding-2-people-together-nothing-can-break-them-up/)

[SONYA PARKER](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sonya-parker/)

> [I met Méret Oppenheim when I was a very young artist just coming to New York. She really liked my early films and showed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-horn/i-met-m-ret-oppenheim-when-i-was-a-very-young-artist-just-coming-to/)

[Rebecca Horn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-horn/)

> [As you grow up, you learn the difference between falling in love and holding hands. kissing doesn't always mean something, promises can be broken…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/as-you-grow-up-you-learn-the-difference-between-falling-in-love-and/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Love … It’s a nice little trick if you can find it. We had found it. But now I knew finding love and holding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-e-pearson/love-it-s-a-nice-little-trick-if-you-can-find-it-we-had-found-it-but/)

[Mary E. Pearson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-e-pearson/)

## More by Jane Alison

> [I know that I was able to find my way out of most of my feelings by writing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-know-that-i-was-able-to-find-my-way-out-of-most-of-my-feelings-by/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [When you get immersed in whatever you're writing, the world does suddenly get so filtered through what you're writing. And then of course what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/when-you-get-immersed-in-whatever-you-re-writing-the-world-does/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [In order to have a real life of any romance, there has to be a level of fantasy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/in-order-to-have-a-real-life-of-any-romance-there-has-to-be-a-level/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [The state of love is this constant flux back and forth between who's saving and who's rescuing, who's wanting and not wanting, who's needing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/the-state-of-love-is-this-constant-flux-back-and-forth-between-who-s/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [“Making a self can be like writing, and now I think writing can be like home: a space you make that you dwell in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/making-a-self-can-be-like-writing-and-now-i-think-writing-can-be-like/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [“Just as there can be a hole in these narratives, a memoir can be as much about what's forgotten as what's remembered.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/just-as-there-can-be-a-hole-in-these-narratives-a-memoir-can-be-as/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I was born in Australia and grew up in the foreign services. I had this kind of trans-Pacific life. I think I was always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-was-born-in-australia-and-grew-up-in-the-foreign-services-i-had/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [When you're waiting for a bus, the thing to do is smoke a cigarette.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/when-you-re-waiting-for-a-bus-the-thing-to-do-is-smoke-a-cigarette/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I think sometimes to still be angry is appropriate, but you want to be able to live with it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-think-sometimes-to-still-be-angry-is-appropriate-but-you-want-to-be/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [“This stream of watching made what was watched wanted.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/this-stream-of-watching-made-what-was-watched-wanted/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I can't say that fantasy instead of the 3D world is fine or good, but I know in my own life I have certain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-can-t-say-that-fantasy-instead-of-the-3d-world-is-fine-or-good-but/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I've always wanted to figure out how to do a walking story. I'd never figured out how to do one and have it work…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-ve-always-wanted-to-figure-out-how-to-do-a-walking-story-i-d-never/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [You have to want something or you're finished.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/you-have-to-want-something-or-you-re-finished/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I suppose you retire from trying. If you retire from trying, you think, "Maybe love will just come my way if I don't want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/i-suppose-you-retire-from-trying-if-you-retire-from-trying-you-think/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [“When you're sixteen or seventeen meaning can be anywhere. A drop of rain running down the window is a symbol, a song comes on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/when-you-re-sixteen-or-seventeen-meaning-can-be-anywhere-a-drop-of/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

[Explore all 31 Jane Alison quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

## More Association quotes

> [If you are poor, shun association with him who measures men with the yardstick of riches.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/khalil-gibran/if-you-are-poor-shun-association-with-him-who-measures-men-with-the/)

[Khalil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/khalil-gibran/)

> [So few men are really worth knowing, that it seems a shameful waste to let an anthropoid prejudice stand in the way of free…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-l-mencken/so-few-men-are-really-worth-knowing-that-it-seems-a-shameful-waste-to/)

[H. L. Mencken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-l-mencken/)

> [For rich children, it'd be very easy and convenient never to take any steps to build an identity outside of your association with your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamie-johnson/for-rich-children-it-d-be-very-easy-and-convenient-never-to-take-any/)

[Jamie Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamie-johnson/)

> [I am a member of that small, little group that covers - I'm a member of the White House correspondents association. I go to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-trump/i-am-a-member-of-that-small-little-group-that-covers-i-m-a-member-of/)

[Donald Trump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-trump/)

> [Most of the more celebrated names among African-American authors, poets, and artists are known to the world because of their association with specific cultural…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aberjhani/most-of-the-more-celebrated-names-among-african-american-authors/)

[Aberjhani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aberjhani/)

> [While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-stewart/while-opponents-label-howard-dean-a-throwback-liberal-the-new-york/)

[Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-stewart/)

> [Anarchism is a definite intellectual current in the life of our times, whose adherents advocate the abolition of economic monopolies and of all political…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rudolf-rocker/anarchism-is-a-definite-intellectual-current-in-the-life-of-our-times/)

[Rudolf Rocker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rudolf-rocker/)

> [The feedback that I get from my association with Gomez is heartwarming. It is very difficult for me to take anything but a positive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-astin/the-feedback-that-i-get-from-my-association-with-gomez-is/)

[John Astin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-astin/)

> [Public and private funds have been thrown around like confetti at a country fair, to close up and destroy clinics, hospitals, and scientific research…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/benedict-fitzgerald/public-and-private-funds-have-been-thrown-around-like-confetti-at-a/)

Benedict Fitzgerald

> [ \[T\]here are, at bottom, basically two ways to order social affairs, Coercively, through the mechanisms of the state - what we can call political… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ed-crane/t-here-are-at-bottom-basically-two-ways-to-order-social-affairs/)

[Ed Crane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ed-crane/)

> [Whatever withdraws us from the power of our senses; whatever makes the past, the distant, or the future, predominate over the present, advances us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-johnson/whatever-withdraws-us-from-the-power-of-our-senses-whatever-makes-the/)

[Samuel Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-johnson/)

> [The Stroke Association has produced leaflets that set out clearly the health risks associated with stroke that African-Caribbean people face.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/linford-christie/the-stroke-association-has-produced-leaflets-that-set-out-clearly-the/)

[Linford Christie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/linford-christie/)

> [The regular division of the plane into congruent figures evoking an association in the observer with a familiar natural object is one of these…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-c-escher/the-regular-division-of-the-plane-into-congruent-figures-evoking-an/)

[M. C. Escher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-c-escher/)

> [Marriage is an association of two persons for the purpose of making one the beneficiary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikrant-parsai/marriage-is-an-association-of-two-persons-for-the-purpose-of-making/)

[Vikrant Parsai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikrant-parsai/)

> [With a shiver of foreboding he saw his marriage becoming what most of the other marriages about him were: a dull association of material…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edith-wharton/with-a-shiver-of-foreboding-he-saw-his-marriage-becoming-what-most-of/)

[Edith Wharton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edith-wharton/)

Browse all 863 Association quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "There's a quote that I learned in college a million years ago. \"Happy, thought I, is the man who can, in one and the same embrace, hold both his love and the object of his love.\" Holding the feeling that you have and all the images that you've got and all the fantasies and romantic associations while also holding the actual core person that's been saddled with all of this.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Jane Alison"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-college-a-million-years-ago-happy/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Association"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-college-a-million-years-ago-happy/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eff/jane-alison-19956_association_there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-colleg_2950225.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“There's a quote that I learned in college a million years ago. \"Happy, thought I, is the man who can, in one…” — Jane Alison",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Jane Alison",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "There's a quote that I learned...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-college-a-million-years-ago-happy/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/there-s-a-quote-that-i-learned-in-college-a-million-years-ago-happy/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
