--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It preoccupies me until it's time to…" description: "\"“It preoccupies me until it's time to leave. It seems such the right expression of grief. I am sad, so in whatever small way I can, I will tear myself ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/952/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daugh_grief_it-preoccupies-me-until-it-s-time-to-lea_2332998.jpg" --- # It preoccupies me until it's time to leave. It seems such… ![“It preoccupies me until it's time to leave. It seems such the right expression of grief. I am sad, so in whatever small way I can, I will tear myself apart. They've taken what's on the inside and made it visible. If I thought it wouldn't be inappropriate I'd do it myself.” quote by Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/952/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daugh_grief_it-preoccupies-me-until-it-s-time-to-lea_2332998.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/952/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daugh_grief_it-preoccupies-me-until-it-s-time-to-lea_2332998.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/952/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daugh_grief_it-preoccupies-me-until-it-s-time-to-lea_2332998.jpg) > ““It preoccupies me until it's time to leave. It seems such the right expression of grief. I am sad, so in whatever small way I can, I will tear myself apart. They've taken what's on the inside and made it visible. If I thought it wouldn't be inappropriate I'd do it myself.”” [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker feels compelled to express grief outwardly, even if it feels excessive, because internal pain has been exposed and must be processed. **In simple terms:** Grief pushes me to act outwardly. Key Takeaway Allow yourself to express pain constructively. Themes grief expression vulnerability Mood sad reflective Type personal emotional When to use this quote - therapy sessions - personal journaling - artistic creation - support groups Key Concepts psychology emotional processing Questions to Reflect On - What healthy outlets can channel this urge? - How does visibility of pain affect healing? A Different Perspective May be perceived as self‑destructive or attention‑seeking. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Mourning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mourning/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Time to leave](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time-to-leave/) [Tradition](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/tradition/) ## Related quotes > [“In the expression of grief lies recovery from grief itself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-priest/in-the-expression-of-grief-lies-recovery-from-grief-itself/) [Christopher Priest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-priest/) > [The belief that a person can and should only feel grief over one sad event at a time is a truly disturbing estimate of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-armintrout/the-belief-that-a-person-can-and-should-only-feel-grief-over-one-sad/) [Jennifer Armintrout](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-armintrout/) > [There are many stages of grief. It's sad, something coming to an end. It cracks you open, in a way -- cracks you open…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-aniston/there-are-many-stages-of-grief-it-s-sad-something-coming-to-an-end-it/) [Jennifer Aniston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-aniston/) > [“She hasn't cried once. SHe doesn't understand that Margaret is dead. At that age, they can't fully understand the concept of death. It's a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-zevin/she-hasn-t-cried-once-she-doesn-t-understand-that-margaret-is-dead-at/) [Gabrielle Zevin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-zevin/) > [Time to leave now, get out of this room, go somewhere, anywhere; sharpen this feeling of happiness and freedom, stretch your limbs, fill your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stefan-zweig/time-to-leave-now-get-out-of-this-room-go-somewhere-anywhere-sharpen/) [Stefan Zweig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stefan-zweig/) > [A wise man once said-'the skill in attending a party is knowing when it's time to leave,'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-stipe/a-wise-man-once-said-the-skill-in-attending-a-party-is-knowing-when/) [Michael Stipe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-stipe/) > [“I was starting to get to know the city, and when that happens in a screwed-up place, it’s time to leave.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nelson-demille/i-was-starting-to-get-to-know-the-city-and-when-that-happens-in-a/) [Nelson DeMille](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nelson-demille/) > [Keep in mind that when you tell people to come see you, they might not get the idea about when it's time to leave.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-yoffe/keep-in-mind-that-when-you-tell-people-to-come-see-you-they-might-not/) [Emily Yoffe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-yoffe/) > [I don't think guys in TV should stay when it's time to leave.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-corso/i-don-t-think-guys-in-tv-should-stay-when-it-s-time-to-leave/) [Lee Corso](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lee-corso/) > [If I can't play 30 to 35 minutes a game, every game, and contribute, then it's time to leave.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-havlicek/if-i-can-t-play-30-to-35-minutes-a-game-every-game-and-contribute/) [John Havlicek](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-havlicek/) > [Cant nothing tear us apart your all I wont in my man I put my life in your hands, got your slippers ya dinner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/cant-nothing-tear-us-apart-your-all-i-wont-in-my-man-i-put-my-life-in/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [When the world grinds you down, bent to tear you apart, cling to what you hold dear, and stay true to your heart. For…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wes-fesler/when-the-world-grinds-you-down-bent-to-tear-you-apart-cling-to-what/) [Wes Fesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wes-fesler/) > [If you give us soft greens and soft fairways, we're going to tear it apart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/justin-thomas/if-you-give-us-soft-greens-and-soft-fairways-we-re-going-to-tear-it/) [Justin Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/justin-thomas/) > [Love can tear you apart... it can kill you. But if youre lucky, it can put you back together.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/unknwon/love-can-tear-you-apart-it-can-kill-you-but-if-youre-lucky-it-can-put/) Unknwon > [When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/when-two-people-are-meant-for-each-other-no-time-is-too-long-no/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter > [“This is home, it's the only place I want to be, but at the same time everything familiar feels strange. It's the same as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/this-is-home-it-s-the-only-place-i-want-to-be-but-at-the-same-time/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“As strange as my life gets, it's just my life. I'm still in it. Whatever happens, I'm going to have to find a way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/as-strange-as-my-life-gets-it-s-just-my-life-i-m-still-in-it-whatever/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“I'm completely out of control, and I can hear the beginnings of the chant, get/out/, but now that I'm not being touched maybe I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/i-m-completely-out-of-control-and-i-can-hear-the-beginnings-of-the/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“I want them to bite into a cookie, and think of me, and smile. Food is love. Food has a power. 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Everything that comes out is smooth and all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/it-s-a-french-technique-soups-get-screened-and-sauces-forced-through/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“One of my professors in college used to say As the wise man said, Do or do not, there is no try, but the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/one-of-my-professors-in-college-used-to-say-as-the-wise-man-said-do/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“She's not quite making sense, but no one does all the time.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/she-s-not-quite-making-sense-but-no-one-does-all-the-time/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“The scene is most beautiful without people in it. People just screw things up. Forget the whole thing, the world, all the living people,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/the-scene-is-most-beautiful-without-people-in-it-people-just-screw/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“His voice is muddy, that's what it is. Dark and brown and muddy. A note to it like coffee left too long on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/his-voice-is-muddy-that-s-what-it-is-dark-and-brown-and-muddy-a-note/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“But I can't force everything into the arrangement I'd like. I can't use denial to make everything simple.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/but-i-can-t-force-everything-into-the-arrangement-i-d-like-i-can-t/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“Alone doesn't just mean without people. It can mean without anything else. And maybe, even without putting a word on me, she's found a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/alone-doesn-t-just-mean-without-people-it-can-mean-without-anything/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“Difficult, but not impossible. I am not impossible.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/difficult-but-not-impossible-i-am-not-impossible/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“He has a key and could come back in, but I doubt he will. He doesn't want to be here any more than I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/he-has-a-key-and-could-come-back-in-but-i-doubt-he-will-he-doesn-t/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) > [“Everybody struggles with this stuff, you know. With social discomfort and grief and fitting in. People with syndromes, people with disorders, people with diagnoses,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/everybody-struggles-with-this-stuff-you-know-with-social-discomfort/) [Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) [Explore all 19 Jael McHenry (The Kitchen Daughter quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jael-mchenry-the-kitchen-daughter/) ## More Grief quotes > [“...they had lived, they'd lived intensely. But no matter how deeply you live, it comes to this in the end: one of you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-morton/they-had-lived-they-d-lived-intensely-but-no-matter-how-deeply-you/) [Brian Morton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-morton/) > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [You felt a deep sorrow, the kind of melancholy you feel when you're in a beautiful place and the sun is going down](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thrity-umrigar/you-felt-a-deep-sorrow-the-kind-of-melancholy-you-feel-when-you-re-in/) [Thrity Umrigar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thrity-umrigar/) > [... how much of our inner substance is it good for us to give to public griefs? The whole modern tendency to agonize over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-bogan/how-much-of-our-inner-substance-is-it-good-for-us-to-give-to-public/) [Louise Bogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-bogan/) > [You dont choose your life; it chooses you. Theres no point asking why life has reserved certain joys or griefs, you just accept them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/you-dont-choose-your-life-it-chooses-you-theres-no-point-asking-why/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [“When we learn to attribute meaning to the events in our lives, we connect with our Higher Purpose, Higher Wisdom, or Source; we become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-barbara-apollon/when-we-learn-to-attribute-meaning-to-the-events-in-our-lives-we/) [Susan Barbara Apollon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-barbara-apollon/) > [Only to have a grief equal to all these tears!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-rich/only-to-have-a-grief-equal-to-all-these-tears/) [Adrienne Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-rich/) > [Nowadays most people wear black most of the time anyway: go to a literary party and one would imagine everyone there was in perpetual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-weldon/nowadays-most-people-wear-black-most-of-the-time-anyway-go-to-a/) [Fay Weldon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-weldon/) > [Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/suppressed-grief-suffocates-it-rages-within-the-breast-and-is-forced/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [That Woman is in love with her own grief.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-zevin/that-woman-is-in-love-with-her-own-grief/) [Gabrielle Zevin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-zevin/) > [Short time seems long in sorrow's sharp sustaining.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/short-time-seems-long-in-sorrow-s-sharp-sustaining/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [These days grief seems like walking on a frozen river; most of the time he feels safe enough, but there is always that danger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/these-days-grief-seems-like-walking-on-a-frozen-river-most-of-the/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [“You've been my beacon of light in my storm of grief, and I don't know if I could live without you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-ashley/you-ve-been-my-beacon-of-light-in-my-storm-of-grief-and-i-don-t-know/) [Katie Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-ashley/) > [Ancient eyes had stared at me, filled with ancient grief. And something more. Something so alien and unexpected that I'd almost burst into tears.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/ancient-eyes-had-stared-at-me-filled-with-ancient-grief-and-something/) [Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/) > [Meanwhile, the trees were just as green as before; the birds sang and the sun shone as clearly now as ever. The familiar surroundings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/meanwhile-the-trees-were-just-as-green-as-before-the-birds-sang-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) [Browse all 8,012 Grief quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“It preoccupies me until it's time to leave. It seems such the right expression of grief. I am sad, so in whatever small way I can, I will tear myself apart. They've taken what's on the inside and made it visible. 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