--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Forgiveness does not mean that we have to…" description: "\"Forgiveness does not mean that we have to continue to relate to those who have done us harm. In some cases the best practice may be to end our connecti..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af3/jack-kornfield-936_amends_forgiveness-does-not-mean-that-we-have-t_220735.jpg" --- # Forgiveness does not mean that we have to continue to… ![“Forgiveness does not mean that we have to continue to relate to those who have done us harm. In some cases the best practice may be to end our connection, to never speak to or be with a harmful person again. Sometimes in the process of forgiveness a person who hurts or betrayed us may wish to make…” quote by Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af3/jack-kornfield-936_amends_forgiveness-does-not-mean-that-we-have-t_220735.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af3/jack-kornfield-936_amends_forgiveness-does-not-mean-that-we-have-t_220735.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af3/jack-kornfield-936_amends_forgiveness-does-not-mean-that-we-have-t_220735.jpg) > “Forgiveness does not mean that we have to continue to relate to those who have done us harm. In some cases the best practice may be to end our connection, to never speak to or be with a harmful person again. Sometimes in the process of forgiveness a person who hurts or betrayed us may wish to make amends, but even this does not require us to put ourselves in the way of further harm.” [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Forgiveness frees us from resentment but does not obligate continued contact with harmful people; we can set boundaries to protect ourselves. **In simple terms:** Forgiveness doesn’t require staying with toxic people. Key Takeaway Set healthy boundaries after forgiving. Themes forgiveness boundaries self‑care Mood reflective empowering Type advice philosophical When to use this quote - leaving abusive relationships - setting limits - healing after betrayal Key Concepts psychology personal growth relationships Questions to Reflect On - How do you balance forgiveness with self‑protection? - When is it safe to reconnect? A Different Perspective Forgiveness alone may not heal deep wounds without further action. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Amends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/amends/) [Best practices](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/best-practices/) [Betrayed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/betrayed/) [Cases](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cases/) [Connections](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/connections/) [Doe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/doe/) [Done](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/done/) [Ends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ends/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Forgiveness Does](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness-does-404090/) [Forgiveness Person](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness-person-2187958/) [Harm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/harm/) [Hurt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurt/) [May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/may/) [Mean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mean/) [Persons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/) [Practice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/practice/) [Process](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/process/) [Process Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/process-forgiveness-410141/) [Relate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relate/) [Relate Harm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relate-harm-2256227/) [Sometimes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sometimes/) [Speak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/speak/) [Way](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/) [Wish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wish/) ## Related quotes > [“See, forgiveness doesn't happen all at once. It's not an event -- it's a process. Forgiveness happens while you're asleep, while you're dreaming, while…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barry-lyga/see-forgiveness-doesn-t-happen-all-at-once-it-s-not-an-event-it-s-a/) [Barry Lyga](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barry-lyga/) > [“Forgiveness is not a “hope it will be” thing. It’s an “accomplished and done” thing. You do not have to hope that you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-david-tripp/forgiveness-is-not-a-hope-it-will-be-thing-it-s-an-accomplished-and/) [Paul David Tripp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-david-tripp/) > [Forgiveness is not for the other person, forgiveness is for you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-ferguson/forgiveness-is-not-for-the-other-person-forgiveness-is-for-you/) [Bill Ferguson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-ferguson/) > [Million of my apologizes, million of her forgiveness , one person Mom.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrea-g-matias/million-of-my-apologizes-million-of-her-forgiveness-one-person-mom/) [Andrea G Matias](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrea-g-matias/) > [“Forgiveness is not mine to give,” Mrs. Saint said. “It belongs to God. And as to whether he will, she will have to wait…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-lawson-timmer/forgiveness-is-not-mine-to-give-mrs-saint-said-it-belongs-to-god-and/) [Julie Lawson Timmer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-lawson-timmer/) > [Forgiveness is not about the other person or what they did. Forgiveness is for YOU and about YOU.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iyanla-vanzant/forgiveness-is-not-about-the-other-person-or-what-they-did/) [Iyanla Vanzant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/iyanla-vanzant/) > [The first and often only person to be healed by forgiveness is the person who does the forgiveness... When we genuinely forgive, we set…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-b-smedes/the-first-and-often-only-person-to-be-healed-by-forgiveness-is-the/) [Lewis B. Smedes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-b-smedes/) > [Forgiveness is only as sincere as the person who says it. I FORGIVE YOU!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-thompson/forgiveness-is-only-as-sincere-as-the-person-who-says-it-i-forgive-you/) [Carl Thompson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-thompson/) > [“People think that forgiveness is for the person who wronged you, but it's not. Because when we allow things to bottle up inside of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vanessa-miller/people-think-that-forgiveness-is-for-the-person-who-wronged-you-but/) [Vanessa Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vanessa-miller/) > [Sometimes, of all the people in the world, the one who is the hardest to forgive-as well as perhaps the one who is most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dieter-f-uchtdorf/sometimes-of-all-the-people-in-the-world-the-one-who-is-the-hardest/) [Dieter F. Uchtdorf](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dieter-f-uchtdorf/) > [Forgiveness is not to give the other person peace. Forgiveness is for you. Take that opportunity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mackenzie-phillips/forgiveness-is-not-to-give-the-other-person-peace-forgiveness-is-for/) [Mackenzie Phillips](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mackenzie-phillips/) > [Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/forgiveness-does-not-change-the-past-but-it-does-enlarge-the-future/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Forgiveness does not overlook the deed. It rises above it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pumla-gobodo-madikizela/forgiveness-does-not-overlook-the-deed-it-rises-above-it/) [Pumla Gobodo-Madikizela](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pumla-gobodo-madikizela/) > [“If forgiveness does take place it will be but an echo of the forgiveness granted by the just and loving God-- the only forgiveness…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/miroslav-volf/if-forgiveness-does-take-place-it-will-be-but-an-echo-of-the/) [Miroslav Volf](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/miroslav-volf/) > [Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does make the future pleasant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/forgiveness-does-not-change-the-past-but-it-does-make-the-future/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Jack Kornfield > [“When we let go of our battles and open our heart to things as they are, then we come to rest in the present…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/when-we-let-go-of-our-battles-and-open-our-heart-to-things-as-they/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [In opening we can see how many times we have mistaken small identities and fearful beliefs for our true nature and how limiting this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/in-opening-we-can-see-how-many-times-we-have-mistaken-small/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [Wherever you are is the perfect place to awaken. This moment is the exact place to practice compassion and loving awareness. You have all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/wherever-you-are-is-the-perfect-place-to-awaken-this-moment-is-the/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [Acceptance does not mean inaction. We may need to respond, strongly at times...From a peaceful center we can respond instead of react. Unconscious reactions…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/acceptance-does-not-mean-inaction-we-may-need-to-respond-strongly-at/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [To live in this precious animal body on this earth is as great a part of spiritual life as anything else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/to-live-in-this-precious-animal-body-on-this-earth-is-as-great-a-part/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [We do not have to improve ourselves; we just have to let go of what blocks our heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/we-do-not-have-to-improve-ourselves-we-just-have-to-let-go-of-what/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [To open deeply, as genuine spiritual life requires, we need tremendous courage and strength, a kind of warrior spirit.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/to-open-deeply-as-genuine-spiritual-life-requires-we-need-tremendous/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [As we step out of the way new things are born.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/as-we-step-out-of-the-way-new-things-are-born/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [For most of us, generosity is a quality that must be developed. We have to respect that it will grow gradually; otherwise our spirituality…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/for-most-of-us-generosity-is-a-quality-that-must-be-developed-we-have/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [What is truly a part of our spiritual path is that which brings us alive. If gardening brings us alive, that is part of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/what-is-truly-a-part-of-our-spiritual-path-is-that-which-brings-us/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [“Working with these distractions, steadying the canoe, letting the waves pass by, and coming back again and again in a quiet and collected way,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/working-with-these-distractions-steadying-the-canoe-letting-the-waves/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [To understand ourselves and our life is the point of insight meditation: to understand and to be free.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/to-understand-ourselves-and-our-life-is-the-point-of-insight/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [To let go in the deepest recesses of the heart, to release all struggle and wanting, leads us to that knowing which is timeless.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/to-let-go-in-the-deepest-recesses-of-the-heart-to-release-all/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [Wisdom says we are nothing. Love says we are everything. Between these two our life flows.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/wisdom-says-we-are-nothing-love-says-we-are-everything-between-these/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) > [Breathing meditation can quiet the mind, open the body, and develop a great power of concentration.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kornfield/breathing-meditation-can-quiet-the-mind-open-the-body-and-develop-a/) [Jack Kornfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) [Explore all 324 Jack Kornfield quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kornfield/) ## More Amends quotes > [I am making amends and seeking forgiveness. My only hope is that some good can come out of my situation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jayson-blair/i-am-making-amends-and-seeking-forgiveness-my-only-hope-is-that-some/) [Jayson Blair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jayson-blair/) > [Put that pride/stubbornness aside and reach out to someone n make amends.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/put-that-pride-stubbornness-aside-and-reach-out-to-someone-n-make/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [We make stupid mistakes when we're young; we do our best to make amends for them as we get older. We survive by learning;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allen-steele/we-make-stupid-mistakes-when-we-re-young-we-do-our-best-to-make/) [Allen Steele](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allen-steele/) > [ Sadly, \[Pablo Escobar\] ended up throwing away the one opportunity he had. I naively thought, as a son and as many other Colombians, that… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/juan-pablo-escobar/sadly-pablo-escobar-ended-up-throwing-away-the-one-opportunity-he-had/) [Juan Pablo Escobar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/juan-pablo-escobar/) > [If you did something in 1975 that you deeply regret and that you now can recognize as having been profoundly irresponsible, for example, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/if-you-did-something-in-1975-that-you-deeply-regret-and-that-you-now/) [Marianne Williamson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marianne-williamson/) > [Karma means that all actions have consequences. Grace means that in a moment of atonement -taking responsibility, making amends, asking for forgiveness - all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/karma-means-that-all-actions-have-consequences-grace-means-that-in-a/) [Marianne Williamson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marianne-williamson/) > [“The difference between humility and humiliation is willingness. Ultimately, it's not for them. It's for me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-hart/the-difference-between-humility-and-humiliation-is-willingness/) [Rob Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-hart/) > [Like the Puritans, live in terms of the settled judgement that the joy of heaven will make amends of any losses and crosses, strains…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-beeke/like-the-puritans-live-in-terms-of-the-settled-judgement-that-the-joy/) [Joel Beeke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-beeke/) > [As long as you live, it is never too late to make amends. Take my advice, child. Don't waste your precious life with regrets…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-hesse/as-long-as-you-live-it-is-never-too-late-to-make-amends-take-my/) [Karen Hesse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-hesse/) > [Making amends with some people just for the sake of it is a sign of maturity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/making-amends-with-some-people-just-for-the-sake-of-it-is-a-sign-of/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-think-we-are-well-advised-to-keep-on-nodding-terms-with-the-people/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“Not to know that no space of regret can make amends for one life's misused oppurtunities!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/not-to-know-that-no-space-of-regret-can-make-amends-for-one-life-s/) [Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/) > [Let a man do what he will by a single woman, the world is encouragingly apt to think Marriage a sufficient amends.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-richardson/let-a-man-do-what-he-will-by-a-single-woman-the-world-is/) [Samuel Richardson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-richardson/) > [“The past is the past, and he can't make amends, only hope that the gain will outlast the damage.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikram-seth/the-past-is-the-past-and-he-can-t-make-amends-only-hope-that-the-gain/) [Vikram Seth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikram-seth/) > [A child who's been injured by a parent waits her whole life for some acknowledgment of the wrong that's been done, some validation from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-unger/a-child-who-s-been-injured-by-a-parent-waits-her-whole-life-for-some/) [Lisa Unger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-unger/) [Browse all 90 Amends quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/amends/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Forgiveness does not mean that we have to continue to relate to those who have done us harm. 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