--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We can ask and ask but we can't have…" description: "\"“We can ask and ask but we can't have again what once seemed ours for ever - the way things looked, that church alone in the fields, a bed on a belfry ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a4/j-l-carr-39640_long-ago_we-can-ask-and-ask-but-we-can-t-have-aga_2970482.png" --- # We can ask and ask but we can't have again what once… ![“We can ask and ask but we can't have again what once seemed ours for ever - the way things looked, that church alone in the fields, a bed on a belfry floor, a remembered voice, the touch of a hand, a loved face. They've gone and you can only wait for the pain to pass. All this happened so long…” quote by J.L. Carr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a4/j-l-carr-39640_long-ago_we-can-ask-and-ask-but-we-can-t-have-aga_2970482.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a4/j-l-carr-39640_long-ago_we-can-ask-and-ask-but-we-can-t-have-aga_2970482.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a4/j-l-carr-39640_long-ago_we-can-ask-and-ask-but-we-can-t-have-aga_2970482.png) > ““We can ask and ask but we can't have again what once seemed ours for ever - the way things looked, that church alone in the fields, a bed on a belfry floor, a remembered voice, the touch of a hand, a loved face. They've gone and you can only wait for the pain to pass. All this happened so long ago. And I never returned, never wrote, never met anyone who might have given me news of Oxgodby. So, in memory, it stays as I left it, a sealed room furnished by the past, airless, still, ink long dry on a put-down pen. But this was something I knew nothing of as I closed the gate and set off across the meadow.”” [J.L. Carr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-l-carr/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker mourns lost moments and places, realizing that memory preserves them as static, unchanging scenes while life moves on. **In simple terms:** Memories hold past scenes unchanged, but we must let go. Key Takeaway Accept loss, cherish memory, move forward. Themes loss memory time acceptance loneliness Mood melancholy reflective Type literary philosophical When to use this quote - grieving a loved one - revisiting childhood places - dealing with unresolved past - writing about loss - coping with change Key Concepts nostalgia impermanence grief reflection Questions to Reflect On - How do you balance honoring memory with living now? - What does letting go look like for you? A Different Perspective Memory can trap us in static nostalgia, hindering present growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Long ago](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/long-ago/) ## Related quotes > [Suspense left my life a long time ago, now it has returned. I do not care for it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ben-marcus/suspense-left-my-life-a-long-time-ago-now-it-has-returned-i-do-not/) [Ben Marcus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ben-marcus/) > [“outside the garage, closed the gate, and was just about to enter through the side door when I was met by Amanda and Bob.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/blair-howard/outside-the-garage-closed-the-gate-and-was-just-about-to-enter/) Blair Howard > [“As she closed the gate behind her she noticed her own name on one of the big envelopes. 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Annie Proulx (Author > [So here is my story, may it bring Some smiles and a tear or so, It happened once upon a time, Far away, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-jacques/so-here-is-my-story-may-it-bring-some-smiles-and-a-tear-or-so-it/) [Brian Jacques](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-jacques/) > [“In the middle of the cemetery is a grassy plane, strangely vacant. 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