--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: There was only one hope she didn't and…" description: "\"“There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow herself to hold on to: that if, in almost thirty years, she hadn't found a man, not a single one..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg" --- # There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow… ![“There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow herself to hold on to: that if, in almost thirty years, she hadn't found a man, not a single one, who was exclusively significant for her, who had become inevitable to her, someone who was strong and brought her the mystery she had been waiting…” quote by Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg) > ““There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow herself to hold on to: that if, in almost thirty years, she hadn't found a man, not a single one, who was exclusively significant for her, who had become inevitable to her, someone who was strong and brought her the mystery she had been waiting for, not a single one who was really a man and not an eccentric, a weakling or one of the needy the world was full of - then the man simply didn't exist, and as long as this New Man did not exist, one could only be friendly and kind to one another, for a while. There was nothing more to make of it, and it would be best if women and men kept their distance and had nothing to do with each other until both had found their way out of the tangle and confusion, the discrepancy inherent in all relationships.”” [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. She describes a yearning for an ideal partner, suggesting that without such a figure, people remain distant and cautious. **In simple terms:** Waiting for a perfect love can keep us apart. Key Takeaway Accept imperfection in relationships. Themes love expectations loneliness Mood melancholic thoughtful Type literary philosophical When to use this quote - dating - friendship - self‑growth - emotional healing Key Concepts idealization relationship dynamics Questions to Reflect On - What expectations do you hold for partners? - Can connections thrive without perfection? A Different Perspective The notion of a singular “New Man” may be unrealistic. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Incompatibility](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/incompatibility/) [Men & women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men-women-2/) [Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationships/) ## Related quotes > [When these guitar mags bring up that stuff up and say such and such came up with this and that which is pushing the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-satriani/when-these-guitar-mags-bring-up-that-stuff-up-and-say-such-and-such/) [Joe Satriani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-satriani/) > [So it was just a case of getting a bunch of songs that I had been writing for years but hadn't recorded together, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-marx/so-it-was-just-a-case-of-getting-a-bunch-of-songs-that-i-had-been/) [Richard Marx](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-marx/) > [“She’d been back not two days and that was all it had taken to realize that, for the last seventeen years, I hadn’t been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aly-martinez/she-d-been-back-not-two-days-and-that-was-all-it-had-taken-to-realize/) [Aly Martinez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aly-martinez/) > [One of the downfalls of not being in Stone Sour was I sat at home for two and a half years, and I hadn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-root/one-of-the-downfalls-of-not-being-in-stone-sour-was-i-sat-at-home-for/) [Jim Root](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-root/) > [He put his hand on his forehead and scoured the French department of his memory for a word. He knew it was in there.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-cotterill/he-put-his-hand-on-his-forehead-and-scoured-the-french-department-of/) [Colin Cotterill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-cotterill/) > [I hope I didn't bore you too much with my life story.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elvis-presley/i-hope-i-didn-t-bore-you-too-much-with-my-life-story/) [Elvis Presley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elvis-presley/) > [Dan: 'Ah, well, I hope this didn't have anything to do with me.' Ellen: 'No, not unless you played Cat Woman in Batman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-degeneres/dan-ah-well-i-hope-this-didn-t-have-anything-to-do-with-me-ellen-no/) [Ellen DeGeneres](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-degeneres/) > [“Anna, I hope I didn’t wake”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deborah-raney/anna-i-hope-i-didn-t-wake/) [Deborah Raney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deborah-raney/) > [I hope I didn't brain my damage!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikhil-saluja/i-hope-i-didn-t-brain-my-damage/) [Nikhil Saluja](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikhil-saluja/) > [“Fuckin' A... hope didn't so much spring eternal as it drowned out common sense and self-preservation.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-r-ward/fuckin-a-hope-didn-t-so-much-spring-eternal-as-it-drowned-out-common/) [J.R. Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-r-ward/) > [“down quickly. I hope he didn’t see me because I had an”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-rennison/down-quickly-i-hope-he-didn-t-see-me-because-i-had-an/) [Louise Rennison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-rennison/) > [“Hope it didn't come easy. It had to be continuously created and called upon or it would disappear as soon as something else took…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-morris/hope-it-didn-t-come-easy-it-had-to-be-continuously-created-and-called/) [James Morris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-morris/) > [“Easy enough to fight when the monster kept its distance, easy enough to draw the line. But when the moster was literally outside the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carla-buckley/easy-enough-to-fight-when-the-monster-kept-its-distance-easy-enough/) Carla Buckley > [“I told you. I want to talk to you." "So talk," she said. "Not like this." His hand wrapped around her arm and made…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-addison-allen/i-told-you-i-want-to-talk-to-you-so-talk-she-said-not-like-this-his/) [Sarah Addison Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-addison-allen/) > [“I’ve always liked you, from the first moment I saw you at the Pigafetta Stadium.” He kept his distance because he wanted her too…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mirella-muffarotto/i-ve-always-liked-you-from-the-first-moment-i-saw-you-at-the/) [Mirella Muffarotto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mirella-muffarotto/) ## More by Ingeborg Bachmann > [If we had the right words, if we had the language, we would need no weapons.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/if-we-had-the-right-words-if-we-had-the-language-we-would-need-no/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [I don't take drugs, I take books.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/i-don-t-take-drugs-i-take-books/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [I myself am a person who has never resigned myself, who is absolutely never resigned, who can’t imagine it at all. I simply observe,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/i-myself-am-a-person-who-has-never-resigned-myself-who-is-absolutely/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“Nonetheless even in capitulation there is still hope, and this hope of human beings never ends, will never end.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/nonetheless-even-in-capitulation-there-is-still-hope-and-this-hope-of/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“If I had not immersed myself in books, in stories and legends, in newspapers, in reports, if everything communicable had not grown up in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/if-i-had-not-immersed-myself-in-books-in-stories-and-legends-in/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“...all of this is such a long and dark and untellable story (untellable as all stories are). Meanwhile, one can only hold onto what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/all-of-this-is-such-a-long-and-dark-and-untellable-story-untellable/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“...the simple task of getting dressed and undressed was a real strain, but nothing could compare with her addiction to deep sleep...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/the-simple-task-of-getting-dressed-and-undressed-was-a-real-strain/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [I am writing with my burnt hand about the nature of fire.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/i-am-writing-with-my-burnt-hand-about-the-nature-of-fire/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“Never was there so much magic over things as when you spoke, and never were words so powerful. You could make speech flare up,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/never-was-there-so-much-magic-over-things-as-when-you-spoke-and-never/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“Hello! It could only have been Andre, but she replaced the receiver instantly, reaching for the tiny, crumpled scrap of paper and tucking it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/hello-it-could-only-have-been-andre-but-she-replaced-the-receiver/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [Silent night, holy night, when the bough flies from the tree and is hung everywhere, when from tables the crusts fly, when the gifts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/silent-night-holy-night-when-the-bough-flies-from-the-tree-and-is/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“My share, it should be lost.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/my-share-it-should-be-lost/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“I am a dead man who wanders registered nowhere”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/i-am-a-dead-man-who-wanders-registered-nowhere/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“As it was all was lost. He was alive, yes, he was alive, he felt this for the first time. But he knew now…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/as-it-was-all-was-lost-he-was-alive-yes-he-was-alive-he-felt-this-for/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) > [“Yaşayacak bir niçin'i bulunan, hemen her nasıla dayanabilir.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/ya-ayacak-bir-ni-in-i-bulunan-hemen-her-nas-la-dayanabilir/) [Ingeborg Bachmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) [Explore all 35 Ingeborg Bachmann quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/) ## More Incompatibility quotes > [There are degrees of incompatibility, and there are more factors relevant to upholding democracy and human rights than the operation of neoliberal markets. Perhaps…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-a-falk/there-are-degrees-of-incompatibility-and-there-are-more-factors/) [Richard A. Falk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-a-falk/) > [People don't scream or swear or pout or sulk when there's compatibility. But most growth occurs when there's incompatibility. When it comes to resilience,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ross-w-greene/people-don-t-scream-or-swear-or-pout-or-sulk-when-there-s/) [Ross W. Greene](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ross-w-greene/) > [Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ambrose-bierce/incompatibility-in-matrimony-a-similarity-of-tastes-particularly-the/) [Ambrose Bierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ambrose-bierce/) > [“Together, we form a necessary paradox; not a senseless contradiction.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/criss-jami/together-we-form-a-necessary-paradox-not-a-senseless-contradiction/) [Criss Jami](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/criss-jami/) > [One of the leading causes of divorce is sexual incompatibility. Why not mandate premarital sex, overseen, of course, by the Marriage Board to ensure…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-rosen/one-of-the-leading-causes-of-divorce-is-sexual-incompatibility-why/) Mike Rosen > [The progressive Left can be in favor of Big Government or population control but not both. The mutual incompatibility is about to plunge Europe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-steyn/the-progressive-left-can-be-in-favor-of-big-government-or-population/) [Mark Steyn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-steyn/) > [“Millions of business people are each constantly forced to choose between their desire to not be a bad person and their desire to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/millions-of-business-people-are-each-constantly-forced-to-choose/) [Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) > [When there's a good fit between skills and expectations, there's what we call compatibility, and we would expect a good outcome. When there's a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ross-w-greene/when-there-s-a-good-fit-between-skills-and-expectations-there-s-what/) [Ross W. Greene](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ross-w-greene/) > [The notion that persons should be safe from extermination as long as they do not commit willful murder, or levy war against the Crown,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-bernard-shaw/the-notion-that-persons-should-be-safe-from-extermination-as-long-as/) [George Bernard Shaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-bernard-shaw/) > [“An omnipotent god can create a being whose acts are known only to itself. An omniscient god cannot do this. It would appear, then,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-r-la-croix/an-omnipotent-god-can-create-a-being-whose-acts-are-known-only-to/) Richard R. LA Croix > [I don't think there is any incompatibility between science and mysticism . . . Immanent religion is the only form of religion in which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aldous-huxley/i-don-t-think-there-is-any-incompatibility-between-science-and/) [Aldous Huxley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aldous-huxley/) > [as everybody knows, truthfulness and agreeable manners are often divorced on the ground of incompatibility.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-deland/as-everybody-knows-truthfulness-and-agreeable-manners-are-often/) [Margaret Deland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-deland/) > [What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/what-counts-in-making-a-happy-marriage-is-not-so-much-how-compatible/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“The hardest part about being back in the human world was relearning emotion. Everything a wolf does has a practical, simple reason. There is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/the-hardest-part-about-being-back-in-the-human-world-was-relearning/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [A style does not go out of style as long as it adapts itself to its period](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/coco-chanel/a-style-does-not-go-out-of-style-as-long-as-it-adapts-itself-to-its/) [Coco Chanel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/coco-chanel/) [Browse all 55 Incompatibility quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/incompatibility/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow herself to hold on to: that if, in almost thirty years, she hadn't found a man, not a single one, who was exclusively significant for her, who had become inevitable to her, someone who was strong and brought her the mystery she had been waiting for, not a single one who was really a man and not an eccentric, a weakling or one of the needy the world was full of - then the man simply didn't exist, and as long as this New Man did not exist, one could only be friendly and kind to one another, for a while. There was nothing more to make of it, and it would be best if women and men kept their distance and had nothing to do with each other until both had found their way out of the tangle and confusion, the discrepancy inherent in all relationships.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Ingeborg Bachmann" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-wouldn-t-allow-herself-to-hold/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Incompatibility" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-wouldn-t-allow-herself-to-hold/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9e/ingeborg-bachmann-12011_incompatibility_there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-w_1319007.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There was only one hope she didn't and wouldn't allow herself to hold on to: that if, in almost thirty…” — Ingeborg Bachmann", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Ingeborg Bachmann", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ingeborg-bachmann/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“There was only one hope she...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-wouldn-t-allow-herself-to-hold/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ingeborg-bachmann/there-was-only-one-hope-she-didn-t-and-wouldn-t-allow-herself-to-hold/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```