--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The only way to end grief was to go…" description: "\"“The only way to end grief was to go through it.”\" — Holly Black" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png" --- # The only way to end grief was to go through it. ![“The only way to end grief was to go through it.” quote by Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png) > ““The only way to end grief was to go through it.”” [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Grieving must be experienced fully to heal; avoidance prolongs pain. **In simple terms:** Feel grief to heal. Key Takeaway Allow yourself to process loss. Themes grief healing emotions Mood somber empathetic Type psychological inspirational When to use this quote - personal loss - therapy sessions - support groups Key Concepts acceptance psychology resilience Questions to Reflect On - What emotions surface when you face grief? - How can you support others in their mourning? A Different Perspective Some may find confronting grief overwhelming. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Death](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/death/) [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) ## Related quotes > [There is no end to grief. Nor no end to poetry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/babette-deutsch/there-is-no-end-to-grief-nor-no-end-to-poetry/) [Babette Deutsch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/babette-deutsch/) > [“...for you can grieve your heart out and in the end you are still where you were. All your grief hasn't changed a thing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-frazier/for-you-can-grieve-your-heart-out-and-in-the-end-you-are-still-where/) [Charles Frazier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-frazier/) > [“Grief isn't something you can finish; it isn't something with a beginning and an end. Grief is something you absorb, something you accept. But…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-m-darhower/grief-isn-t-something-you-can-finish-it-isn-t-something-with-a/) [J.M. Darhower](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-m-darhower/) > [“...it was pointless to think how those years could have been put to better use, for he could hardly have put them to worse.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-frazier/it-was-pointless-to-think-how-those-years-could-have-been-put-to/) [Charles Frazier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-frazier/) > [“Grief is not a feeling it is a capacity. It is not something that disables you, we are not on the receiving end of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-jenkinson/grief-is-not-a-feeling-it-is-a-capacity-it-is-not-something-that/) Stephen Jenkinson > [“Dropping into a thorn bush can lead to no end of grief.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-lawrence/dropping-into-a-thorn-bush-can-lead-to-no-end-of-grief/) [Mark Lawrence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-lawrence/) > [“And thus they form a perfect group; he walks back two or three paces, selects his point of sight, and begins to sketch a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-elizabeth-braddon/and-thus-they-form-a-perfect-group-he-walks-back-two-or-three-paces/) [Mary Elizabeth Braddon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-elizabeth-braddon/) > [The tortures of present death disturb him not, but the recollection of his fall, fills him with a holy sorrow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-strachan/the-tortures-of-present-death-disturb-him-not-but-the-recollection-of/) [John Strachan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-strachan/) > [“...our loves ones truly are ever-present. We may bury their bodies or scatter their ashes, but their spirits are boundless and do not accompany…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/april-slaughter/our-loves-ones-truly-are-ever-present-we-may-bury-their-bodies-or/) April Slaughter > [“...what happens when you return and find nothing but a hollowed shell, shingles and floor, walls and echoes and the light that lead you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kellie-elmore/what-happens-when-you-return-and-find-nothing-but-a-hollowed-shell/) [Kellie Elmore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kellie-elmore/) > [These days grief seems like walking on a frozen river; most of the time he feels safe enough, but there is always that danger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/these-days-grief-seems-like-walking-on-a-frozen-river-most-of-the/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/suppressed-grief-suffocates-it-rages-within-the-breast-and-is-forced/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [Only to have a grief equal to all these tears!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-rich/only-to-have-a-grief-equal-to-all-these-tears/) [Adrienne Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-rich/) > [... how much of our inner substance is it good for us to give to public griefs? The whole modern tendency to agonize over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-bogan/how-much-of-our-inner-substance-is-it-good-for-us-to-give-to-public/) [Louise Bogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-bogan/) > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) ## More by Holly Black > [“What they don’t realize is this: Yes, they frighten me, but I have always been scared, since the day I got here. I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/what-they-don-t-realize-is-this-yes-they-frighten-me-but-i-have/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [When you don't know what you're searching for, you have to look absolutely everywhere.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/when-you-don-t-know-what-you-re-searching-for-you-have-to-look/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“Madoc makes a snorting sound, then turns to me. 'I am sure that Wren here wouldn't mind taking Lady Nore's castle and lands for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/madoc-makes-a-snorting-sound-then-turns-to-me-i-am-sure-that-wren/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [That’s family for you. Can’t live with them, can’t murder them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/that-s-family-for-you-can-t-live-with-them-can-t-murder-them/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“No, I won't help you. No I won't hear you explain why I should. It really is a magical word: no. You say whatever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/no-i-won-t-help-you-no-i-won-t-hear-you-explain-why-i-should-it/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [Let her alone,' said the enkanto, 'or I will curse you blind, lame, and worse.' The old man laughed. 'I'm a curse breaker, fool.'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/let-her-alone-said-the-enkanto-or-i-will-curse-you-blind-lame-and/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“lt's an honor and a delight to meet you and a tragedy you're here”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/lt-s-an-honor-and-a-delight-to-meet-you-and-a-tragedy-you-re-here/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“No fire at all.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/no-fire-at-all/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“His wax-white skin was cool to the touch when she brushed his neck to find the knot of cloth. She'd never been this close…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/his-wax-white-skin-was-cool-to-the-touch-when-she-brushed-his-neck-to/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [So what are you really wearing?" The words left her mouth before she could consider them. She winced. He didn't seem to mind; in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/so-what-are-you-really-wearing-the-words-left-her-mouth-before-she/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“I grab a chair. "I don't mean to pry," I say, "but we're in a hospital. You sure you're fine?" She sighs heavily. "No…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/i-grab-a-chair-i-don-t-mean-to-pry-i-say-but-we-re-in-a-hospital-you/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [Kaye: You know what the sun looks like? Janet: No, What? Kaye: Like he slit his wrists in a bathtub and the blood is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/kaye-you-know-what-the-sun-looks-like-janet-no-what-kaye-like-he-slit/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“That was how she felt, right then. As if there was too much of her, as if her skin was tight with muchness. She…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/that-was-how-she-felt-right-then-as-if-there-was-too-much-of-her-as/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“It was a vow, a piece of a chant, their scripture, something they took so seriously that saying it aloud embarrassed them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/it-was-a-vow-a-piece-of-a-chant-their-scripture-something-they-took/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) > [“Some broken things stay broken”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/some-broken-things-stay-broken/) [Holly Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) [Explore all 666 Holly Black quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/) ## More Death quotes > [“He wondered how it was fair that your dying should depend so much on when you were born.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/he-wondered-how-it-was-fair-that-your-dying-should-depend-so-much-on/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [What sets worlds in motion is the interplay of differences, their attractions and repulsions. Life is plurality, death is uniformity. By suppressing differences and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/octavio-paz/what-sets-worlds-in-motion-is-the-interplay-of-differences-their/) [Octavio Paz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/octavio-paz/) > [Most of us are convinced that we are our egos, which is who we think we are. The ego is part of our incarnation.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ram-dass/most-of-us-are-convinced-that-we-are-our-egos-which-is-who-we-think/) [Ram Dass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ram-dass/) > [I do not want to live at the cost of the life even of a snake. I should let him bite me to death…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mahatma-gandhi/i-do-not-want-to-live-at-the-cost-of-the-life-even-of-a-snake-i/) [Mahatma Gandhi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mahatma-gandhi/) > [“It was beautiful. He thought he had never seen anything so beautiful in all his life; that, having seen it, he could die content,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mira-grant/it-was-beautiful-he-thought-he-had-never-seen-anything-so-beautiful/) [Mira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mira-grant/) > [Retirement? You're talking about death, right?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-altman/retirement-you-re-talking-about-death-right/) [Robert Altman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-altman/) > [With multiplayer, permanent death, and an ever-changing world to explore and conquer, 'A Valley Without Wind' might be the place you're looking for if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-manuel/with-multiplayer-permanent-death-and-an-ever-changing-world-to/) [Rob Manuel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-manuel/) > [“What did you see?” she asked gently. His brow furrowed, as if he could not understand the question. Then his eyes turned to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-anthony-torino/what-did-you-see-she-asked-gently-his-brow-furrowed-as-if-he-could/) J. Anthony Torino > [Those whose life is long still strive for gain, and for all mortals all things take second place to money.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophocles/those-whose-life-is-long-still-strive-for-gain-and-for-all-mortals/) [Sophocles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophocles/) > [“I practice Dying--every night-- But have not learned to, still-- Though Talented--by Mortal bones-- For such a common Skill.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-w-powers/i-practice-dying-every-night-but-have-not-learned-to-still-though/) Alan W. Powers > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [I am not a depressive person at all, but I reflect a lot on my life, and life in general, from the perspective of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alejandro-gonzalez-inarritu/i-am-not-a-depressive-person-at-all-but-i-reflect-a-lot-on-my-life/) [Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alejandro-gonzalez-inarritu/) > [“Death is a reality that calls the rest of life and all of our assorted strivings into sharp relief.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/craig-d-lounsbrough/death-is-a-reality-that-calls-the-rest-of-life-and-all-of-our/) [Craig D. Lounsbrough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/craig-d-lounsbrough/) > [I love life. I love life to death.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emmanuelle-riva/i-love-life-i-love-life-to-death/) [Emmanuelle Riva](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emmanuelle-riva/) > [I think when you’re dying you start looking for important things in the corners. You can’t let anything that seems even semi-important pass, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-crutcher/i-think-when-you-re-dying-you-start-looking-for-important-things-in/) [Chris Crutcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-crutcher/) [Browse all 39,127 Death quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/death/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“The only way to end grief was to go through it.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Holly Black" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-through-it/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Death" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-through-it/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b89/holly-black-329_death_the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-thro_2263964.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The only way to end grief was to go through it.” — Holly Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Holly Black", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-black/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“The only way to end grief...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-through-it/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-black/the-only-way-to-end-grief-was-to-go-through-it/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```