--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: An intimate relationship is one in which…" description: "\"An intimate relationship is one in which neither party silences, sacrifices, or betrays the self and each party expresses strength and vulnerability, w..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/569/harriet-lerner-4248_balanced_an-intimate-relationship-is-one-in-which_2127751.jpg" --- # An intimate relationship is one in which neither party… ![“An intimate relationship is one in which neither party silences, sacrifices, or betrays the self and each party expresses strength and vulnerability, weakness and competence in a balanced way.” quote by Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/569/harriet-lerner-4248_balanced_an-intimate-relationship-is-one-in-which_2127751.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/569/harriet-lerner-4248_balanced_an-intimate-relationship-is-one-in-which_2127751.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/569/harriet-lerner-4248_balanced_an-intimate-relationship-is-one-in-which_2127751.jpg) > “An intimate relationship is one in which neither party silences, sacrifices, or betrays the self and each party expresses strength and vulnerability, weakness and competence in a balanced way.” [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Advocates relationships where both partners maintain authenticity, expressing both strength and vulnerability equally **In simple terms:** Healthy intimacy balances honesty with empathy, without losing self Key Takeaway Foster balanced, authentic connections Themes intimacy authenticity emotional balance Mood supportive honest empathetic Type psychology relationship advice When to use this quote - couples therapy - friendship - team projects - conflict resolution Key Concepts self‑respect mutual vulnerability Questions to Reflect On - How do you ensure you don’t sacrifice self in a relationship? - What signs show a partnership is truly balanced? A Different Perspective Maintaining balance can be challenging when power dynamics shift ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Balanced](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/balanced/) [Betray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/betray/) [Competence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/competence/) [Intimate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/intimate/) [Intimate Relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/intimate-relationship/) [Intimate relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/intimate-relationships/) [Party](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/party/) [Relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationship/) [Relationship Party](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationship-party-4342378/) [Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationships/) [Sacrifice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sacrifice/) [Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self/) [Silence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/silence/) [Strength Vulnerability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/strength-vulnerability-1121018/) [Vulnerability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/vulnerability/) [Way](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/) [Weakness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/weakness/) ## Related quotes > [Intimate relationships cannot substitute for a life plan. But to have any meaning or viability at all, a life plan must include intimate relationships.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/intimate-relationships-cannot-substitute-for-a-life-plan-but-to-have/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [“working on key emotional issues at their source, lays the groundwork for more solid intimate relationships in the present or future.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/working-on-key-emotional-issues-at-their-source-lays-the-groundwork/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [If you are getting married it's about the person you are marrying, it's about the relationship. For me it's not about the party.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gyles-brandreth/if-you-are-getting-married-it-s-about-the-person-you-are-marrying-it/) [Gyles Brandreth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gyles-brandreth/) > [“The more aware individuals are of the themes that are central to their own sense of personal identity, the better they can recognize the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barbara-m-newman/the-more-aware-individuals-are-of-the-themes-that-are-central-to/) [Barbara M. Newman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barbara-m-newman/) > [Tenderness and respect-never selfishness-must be the guiding principles in the intimate relationship between husband and wife](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-w-hunter/tenderness-and-respect-never-selfishness-must-be-the-guiding/) [Howard W. Hunter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-w-hunter/) > [The body and mind are one. When the intimate relationship between mind and body is disrupted, aging and entropy accelerate. Restoring mind/body integration brings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/the-body-and-mind-are-one-when-the-intimate-relationship-between-mind/) [Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/) > [What is Christianity all about? It is about an intimate relationship with God. And I HATE a christendom, a churchianity that God is not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-washer/what-is-christianity-all-about-it-is-about-an-intimate-relationship/) [Paul Washer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-washer/) > [People are talking about sex. They're talking about sex with their husbands. They're talking about sex with their girlfriends. They're talking about sex with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/e-l-james-2/people-are-talking-about-sex-they-re-talking-about-sex-with-their/) [E. L. James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/e-l-james-2/) > [In order to be able to make and keep commitments... to enduring, intimate relationships... you need to be a certain kind of person. You…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-silk/in-order-to-be-able-to-make-and-keep-commitments-to-enduring-intimate/) [Danny Silk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danny-silk/) > [Skillfully engaging in intimate relationships can be one of the most potent spiritual practices.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-friend/skillfully-engaging-in-intimate-relationships-can-be-one-of-the-most/) [John Friend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-friend/) > [You cannot have a private relationship in a public arena. You must look to an inner circle of people who really know you. Don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-d-jakes/you-cannot-have-a-private-relationship-in-a-public-arena-you-must/) [T. D. Jakes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-d-jakes/) > [I've never had any intimate relationships with a dolphin.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-freeman/i-ve-never-had-any-intimate-relationships-with-a-dolphin/) [Morgan Freeman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-freeman/) > [It's not how a photographer looks at the world that is important. It's their intimate relationship with it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antoine-d-agata/it-s-not-how-a-photographer-looks-at-the-world-that-is-important-it-s/) [Antoine D'Agata](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antoine-d-agata/) > [I don't believe love is real love if it remains cloistered within the confines of an intimate relationship; it should transcend the private sphere.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/c-e-morgan/i-don-t-believe-love-is-real-love-if-it-remains-cloistered-within-the/) [C.E. Morgan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/c-e-morgan/) > [When adults come together to form an intimate relationship, each person releases into it unresolved issues from their trans-generational pool of unconscious fantasies. Partners…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-raphael-leff/when-adults-come-together-to-form-an-intimate-relationship-each/) [Joan Raphael-Leff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-raphael-leff/) ## More by Harriet Lerner > [“Letting go of anger and hate requires us to give up the hope for a different past, along with the hope of a fantasized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/letting-go-of-anger-and-hate-requires-us-to-give-up-the-hope-for-a/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [“There’s a widespread belief that if you have solid self-esteem you don’t need outside affirmation and praise. This is patently untrue, by the way.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/there-s-a-widespread-belief-that-if-you-have-solid-self-esteem-you/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [It is an act of courage to acknowledge our own uncertainty and sit with it for a while.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/it-is-an-act-of-courage-to-acknowledge-our-own-uncertainty-and-sit/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Silence can pose a greater threat than the difficult truth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/silence-can-pose-a-greater-threat-than-the-difficult-truth/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Nothing you say can ensure that the other person will get it, or respond the way you want. You may never exceed his threshold…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/nothing-you-say-can-ensure-that-the-other-person-will-get-it-or/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [If you exchanged wedding vows, tape them to your bathroom mirror and read them aloud to yourself every morning along with the ritual brushing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/if-you-exchanged-wedding-vows-tape-them-to-your-bathroom-mirror-and/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Kids want nothing more than for all the important adults in their life to get along.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/kids-want-nothing-more-than-for-all-the-important-adults-in-their/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [“People's sense of self worth is pivotal to their ability to look clearly at the hurt they've caused. The more solid one's sense of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/people-s-sense-of-self-worth-is-pivotal-to-their-ability-to-look/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Being able to make a sincere apology - one that says, "Yes, I get it; I screwed up. Your feelings make sense, and I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/being-able-to-make-a-sincere-apology-one-that-says-yes-i-get-it-i/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [“Everyone freaks out. Sometimes the best we can do with fear is befriend it. Expect it and understand that fear will always reappear. Eventually…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/everyone-freaks-out-sometimes-the-best-we-can-do-with-fear-is/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [The bolder and more courageous you are, the more you will learn about yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/the-bolder-and-more-courageous-you-are-the-more-you-will-learn-about/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Underground issues from one relationship or context invariably fuel our fires in another.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/underground-issues-from-one-relationship-or-context-invariably-fuel/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [There are some things for which there is no apology, and on the question of slavery, there is no adequate apology for ripping people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/there-are-some-things-for-which-there-is-no-apology-and-on-the/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [Don't count on the power of your love or your nagging to create something that wasn't there to begin with.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/don-t-count-on-the-power-of-your-love-or-your-nagging-to-create/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [If we only listened with the same passion that we feel about being heard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/if-we-only-listened-with-the-same-passion-that-we-feel-about-being/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) [Explore all 113 Harriet Lerner quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) ## More Balanced quotes > [There were moments, of course. 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