--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I could have hidden in Boston and lived…" description: "\"I could have hidden in Boston and lived at home for three years, gone through my transition, taken voice lessons to make my voice more feminine, gotten..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/415/hari-nef-4518_gender_i-could-have-hidden-in-boston-and-lived_846719.jpg" --- # I could have hidden in Boston and lived at home for three… ![“I could have hidden in Boston and lived at home for three years, gone through my transition, taken voice lessons to make my voice more feminine, gotten gender reassignment surgery, and spent time to complete my transition, but I didn't want to wait. I wanted to be in the world.” quote by Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/415/hari-nef-4518_gender_i-could-have-hidden-in-boston-and-lived_846719.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/415/hari-nef-4518_gender_i-could-have-hidden-in-boston-and-lived_846719.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/415/hari-nef-4518_gender_i-could-have-hidden-in-boston-and-lived_846719.jpg) > “I could have hidden in Boston and lived at home for three years, gone through my transition, taken voice lessons to make my voice more feminine, gotten gender reassignment surgery, and spent time to complete my transition, but I didn't want to wait. I wanted to be in the world.” [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Waiting for societal acceptance delayed personal transition, but the desire to live authentically outweighed the wait. **In simple terms:** I chose to transition now instead of waiting for a perfect moment. Key Takeaway Live authentically now, not later. Themes identity authenticity patience social pressure Mood courageous empowering Type personal inspirational When to use this quote - coming out - medical transition - public speaking Key Concepts gender studies personal agency activism Questions to Reflect On - What fears hold you back from being yourself? - How can you support others in their journeys? A Different Perspective Waiting can cause internal conflict and missed opportunities. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Boston Lived](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boston-lived-703472/) [Gender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gender/) [Gender Reassignment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gender-reassignment-703474/) [Home](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/home/) [Lived Home](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lived-home-703465/) [Three years](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/three-years/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Transition Didn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/transition-didn-703468/) [Transition Taken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/transition-taken-703470/) [Voice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/voice/) [World](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/) ## Related quotes > [I'm old enough to remember Bush v. Gore, and the transition there didn't start until mid-December, and yet it got done.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-c-o-brien/i-m-old-enough-to-remember-bush-v-gore-and-the-transition-there-didn/) [Robert C. O'Brien](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-c-o-brien/) > [When I was going through transition, I didn't push it on everyone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zoey-tur/when-i-was-going-through-transition-i-didn-t-push-it-on-everyone/) [Zoey Tur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zoey-tur/) > [Gender reassignment is an exorcism of the mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/germaine-greer/gender-reassignment-is-an-exorcism-of-the-mother/) [Germaine Greer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/germaine-greer/) > [Not unlike gender reassignment surgery, someone determines that they are of a different race on the inside and they wish to surgically correct that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jess-row/not-unlike-gender-reassignment-surgery-someone-determines-that-they/) [Jess Row](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jess-row/) > [“She just wanted to go home. And not home to the farmhouse where all the ghosts lived, but home to Tai, and to an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-scott/she-just-wanted-to-go-home-and-not-home-to-the-farmhouse-where-all/) [Jennifer Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-scott/) > [“What does the sign say?” “ ‘If you lived here, you’d be home now.’ ” She clenched her hands with excitement. “See, every day people will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susanna-kaysen/what-does-the-sign-say-if-you-lived-here-you-d-be-home-now-she/) [Susanna Kaysen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susanna-kaysen/) > [I lived at home till I was 29.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-romano/i-lived-at-home-till-i-was-29/) [Ray Romano](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-romano/) > [I lived at home while attending the University of Western Australia in Perth, while doing a gap year and - partly - while attending…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-minchin/i-lived-at-home-while-attending-the-university-of-western-australia/) [Tim Minchin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-minchin/) > [I lived at home for 2 1/2 months each time. I waited tables at Govnr's Park Tavern in Denver and then I moved on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dana-perino/i-lived-at-home-for-2-1-2-months-each-time-i-waited-tables-at-govnr-s/) [Dana Perino](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dana-perino/) > [When I went to Burnley I'd only been a pro for 14 months. I wasn't even entirely sure where it was! I always lived…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-austin/when-i-went-to-burnley-i-d-only-been-a-pro-for-14-months-i-wasn-t/) [Charlie Austin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-austin/) > [So when I was 13, I basically left home and never returned and lived at home again. I would come home for a week…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-jurasik/so-when-i-was-13-i-basically-left-home-and-never-returned-and-lived/) [Peter Jurasik](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-jurasik/) > [If I had a caterer that lived at home, it would be fabulous!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darcey-bussell/if-i-had-a-caterer-that-lived-at-home-it-would-be-fabulous/) [Darcey Bussell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/darcey-bussell/) > [I lived at home until I was 23.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/russell-howard/i-lived-at-home-until-i-was-23/) [Russell Howard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/russell-howard/) > [I went to college in Connecticut, which was when I still lived at home. I worked at a video store, a wine store, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-abbott/i-went-to-college-in-connecticut-which-was-when-i-still-lived-at-home/) [Christopher Abbott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-abbott/) > [I lived at home and I cycled every morning to the railway station to travel by train to Johannesburg followed by a walk to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sydney-brenner/i-lived-at-home-and-i-cycled-every-morning-to-the-railway-station-to/) [Sydney Brenner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sydney-brenner/) ## More by Hari Nef > [My only bookings this week came from within my friends. Trans people have been central to New York’s art and fashion scene for nearly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/my-only-bookings-this-week-came-from-within-my-friends-trans-people/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [Sexuality is who you want to be with. Gender identity is who you want to be in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/sexuality-is-who-you-want-to-be-with-gender-identity-is-who-you-want/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I can say with confidence that my trans/transfeminine identity emerges as the most heavily problematized aspect of my lived experience. My transness is not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-can-say-with-confidence-that-my-trans-transfeminine-identity/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I like shows for atmosphere. I don't know, I think a plot-driven show is so boring and masc4masc and gross.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-like-shows-for-atmosphere-i-don-t-know-i-think-a-plot-driven-show/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I think that just because I'm trans, and I feel like I have to prove to people that I'm a woman sometimes, I'm never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-think-that-just-because-i-m-trans-and-i-feel-like-i-have-to-prove/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [People make fun of me because I've been known to eat lunch things for breakfast. I'll eat a good salad. I'll maybe have some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/people-make-fun-of-me-because-i-ve-been-known-to-eat-lunch-things-for/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I like to let my skin breathe, I don't like to stress it out. I don't like to put it through very much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-like-to-let-my-skin-breathe-i-don-t-like-to-stress-it-out-i-don-t/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [Fashion gave me the platform that has made this transition from fashion to Hollywood, from East Coast to West Coast. Fashion gave me the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/fashion-gave-me-the-platform-that-has-made-this-transition-from/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I've certainly been in situations where I've been rejected and endangered and had my humanity put in question - just as almost every woman…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-ve-certainly-been-in-situations-where-i-ve-been-rejected-and/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [Brands like RMS Beauty and Kat Burki are my skincare heroes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/brands-like-rms-beauty-and-kat-burki-are-my-skincare-heroes/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [If I get too glam and polished and pretty, people are like, 'Hari, why aren't you speaking up about issues?' And if I start…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/if-i-get-too-glam-and-polished-and-pretty-people-are-like-hari-why/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I think the skin is the most important part of a strong makeup look, and if you take care of that, the rest will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-think-the-skin-is-the-most-important-part-of-a-strong-makeup-look/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I had family who exposed me to all sorts of different media involving actors - films, theatrical productions touring through Boston. My grandparents, particularly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-had-family-who-exposed-me-to-all-sorts-of-different-media-involving/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [I got the Fire Stick as a gift at the Amazon Emmys after-party in 2015, and because I haven't lived in a house with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hari-nef/i-got-the-fire-stick-as-a-gift-at-the-amazon-emmys-after-party-in/) [Hari Nef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hari-nef/) > [Trans-dating is hardcore, and it's really scary. 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Koch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-h-koch/) > [We need policymakers to keep an eye on gender and write policies that are explicitly designed to include underserved populations like girls in computer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/reshma-saujani/we-need-policymakers-to-keep-an-eye-on-gender-and-write-policies-that/) [Reshma Saujani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/reshma-saujani/) > [UN peacekeeping operations are now increasingly complex and multi-dimensional, going beyond monitoring a ceasefire to actually bringing failed States back to life, often after…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kofi-annan/un-peacekeeping-operations-are-now-increasingly-complex-and-multi/) [Kofi Annan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kofi-annan/) > [As far as the adjectives that I lead with, I think a writer and a comedienne are first. I have never qualified my experience…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/natasha-rothwell/as-far-as-the-adjectives-that-i-lead-with-i-think-a-writer-and-a/) [Natasha Rothwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/natasha-rothwell/) > [Yeah, maybe that's the way to solve the gender inequality that's naturally in relationships: to have a lot more power in the woman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/celine-song/yeah-maybe-that-s-the-way-to-solve-the-gender-inequality-that-s/) [Celine Song](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/celine-song/) > [It's almost comical how un-liberal liberal Hollywood is when it comes to fighting gender and racial bias.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lexi-alexander/it-s-almost-comical-how-un-liberal-liberal-hollywood-is-when-it-comes/) [Lexi Alexander](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lexi-alexander/) > [We've been socialised and told that there is a way to describe people, and that way is by their gender or their sex.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/asia-kate-dillon/we-ve-been-socialised-and-told-that-there-is-a-way-to-describe-people/) [Asia Kate Dillon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/asia-kate-dillon/) > [“If men could see us as we really are, they would be a little amazed; but the cleverest, the acutest men are often under…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlotte-bronte/if-men-could-see-us-as-we-really-are-they-would-be-a-little-amazed/) [Charlotte Brontë](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlotte-bronte/) > [It's very important to me that people accept me as a transgendered female. 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