--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You sap our self-confidence until we…" description: "\"“You sap our self-confidence until we exist merely to court your approval (...) You keep us perpetually off balance, unpleasantly aware of our inferior..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e65/han-suyin-17665_colonialism_you-sap-our-self-confidence-until-we-exi_2672687.jpg" --- # You sap our self-confidence until we exist merely to court… ![“You sap our self-confidence until we exist merely to court your approval (...) You keep us perpetually off balance, unpleasantly aware of our inferiority, and that's the whole secret of your skill and power.” quote by Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e65/han-suyin-17665_colonialism_you-sap-our-self-confidence-until-we-exi_2672687.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e65/han-suyin-17665_colonialism_you-sap-our-self-confidence-until-we-exi_2672687.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e65/han-suyin-17665_colonialism_you-sap-our-self-confidence-until-we-exi_2672687.jpg) > ““You sap our self-confidence until we exist merely to court your approval (...) You keep us perpetually off balance, unpleasantly aware of our inferiority, and that's the whole secret of your skill and power.”” [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker describes how another person's manipulation erodes self‑esteem, keeping them dependent on external approval and feeling inferior. **In simple terms:** Manipulation destroys confidence and creates dependency. Key Takeaway Recognize and resist toxic influence. Themes psychology power dynamics self‑esteem manipulation relationships Mood frustrated defensive Type psychological critical When to use this quote - personal relationships - workplace environments - family dynamics - online interactions Key Concepts control insecurity social influence Questions to Reflect On - What signs indicate you’re being manipulated? - How can you reclaim personal agency? A Different Perspective The accused may claim benevolence while harming. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Approval Perpetually](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/approval-perpetually-2515262/) [Aware Inferiority](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/aware-inferiority-2515261/) [Colonialism](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/colonialism/) [Confidence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/confidence/) [Inferiority Secret](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inferiority-secret-2515260/) [Self confidence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self-confidence/) ## Related quotes > [“And what do we do to fit our English-speaking Chinese, our docile and happy, our truly loyal servants, for the Asia of the future?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/and-what-do-we-do-to-fit-our-english-speaking-chinese-our-docile-and/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [“And that's what Mahudin calls our thought control...an induced hypnosis of inferiority, destroying confidence and initiative, prolonging the period of tutelage which we would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/and-that-s-what-mahudin-calls-our-thought-control-an-induced-hypnosis/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [“There it was: the tactless severity of vital male youth, not a single doubt about his coherence, blind with self-confidence and the virtue of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-roth/there-it-was-the-tactless-severity-of-vital-male-youth-not-a-single/) [Philip Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-roth/) > [The gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labour is immense.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arnold-bennett/the-gain-in-self-confidence-of-having-accomplished-a-tiresome-labour/) [Arnold Bennett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arnold-bennett/) > [I've studied the lives of the 20th century's great businessmen and concluded self-confidence was instrumental in all their success.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alex-spanos/i-ve-studied-the-lives-of-the-20th-century-s-great-businessmen-and/) [Alex Spanos](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alex-spanos/) > [The best way to help Burma is to empower the people of Burma, to help us have enough self-confidence to obtain what we want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aung-san-suu-kyi/the-best-way-to-help-burma-is-to-empower-the-people-of-burma-to-help/) [Aung San Suu Kyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aung-san-suu-kyi/) > [Jealousy is the result of one's lack of self-confidence, self-worth, and self-acceptance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sasha-azevedo/jealousy-is-the-result-of-one-s-lack-of-self-confidence-self-worth/) [Sasha Azevedo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sasha-azevedo/) > [A parent does not do everything for their kid. 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But if you don't have self-confidence sweetheart, forget about looking sexy, you can't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/glen-rambharack/you-can-have-a-nice-body-dress-with-the-latest-fashion-but-if-you-don/) [Glen Rambharack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/glen-rambharack/) > [I had always been scared of the unknown, and I think it had a lot to do with a lack of self-confidence (and wearing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-levy/i-had-always-been-scared-of-the-unknown-and-i-think-it-had-a-lot-to/) [Dan Levy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-levy/) > [“Take care of your costume and your confidence will take care of itself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amit-kalantri/take-care-of-your-costume-and-your-confidence-will-take-care-of-itself/) [Amit Kalantri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amit-kalantri/) > [One of the most powerful concepts, one which is a sure cure for lack of confidence, is the thought that God is with you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/norman-vincent-peale/one-of-the-most-powerful-concepts-one-which-is-a-sure-cure-for-lack/) [Norman Vincent Peale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/norman-vincent-peale/) ## More by Han Suyin > [Persecution matures young rebels.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/persecution-matures-young-rebels/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [And there is not anything in the world stronger than tenderness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/and-there-is-not-anything-in-the-world-stronger-than-tenderness/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [Goldfish are flowers ... flowers that move.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/goldfish-are-flowers-flowers-that-move/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [I had to learn that there is more to the human being than material comfort, more than success, more even than national spirit or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/i-had-to-learn-that-there-is-more-to-the-human-being-than-material/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [People bring to what they see and feel, the inner weather of their souls and complexion of their minds.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/people-bring-to-what-they-see-and-feel-the-inner-weather-of-their/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [Sadness is so ungrateful.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/han-suyin/sadness-is-so-ungrateful/) [Han Suyin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/han-suyin/) > [The rice bowl is to me the most valid reason in the world for doing anything. 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