---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: In marriage, each partner is to be an…"
description: "\"In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts, an enabler rather than a reformer.\"..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg"
---

#  In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather…

![“In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts, an enabler rather than a reformer.” quote by H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg)

> “In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts, an enabler rather than a reformer.”

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Marriage should foster encouragement, forgiveness, and support rather than criticism and hurt.

**In simple terms:** Marriage encourages support.

Key Takeaway

Be an encourager, forgiver, and enabler.

Themes

marriage support forgiveness

Mood

loving constructive

Type

relationship ethical

When to use this quote

- couples counseling
- daily affirmations
- conflict resolution

Key Concepts

criticism hurt reformation

Questions to Reflect On

- How can you practice encouragement today?
- What hurts need forgiving?

A Different Perspective

Expecting perfection is unrealistic.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Enabler Reformer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/enabler-reformer-4395687/) [Encourager Critic](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/encourager-critic-4395685/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Hurts Enabler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurts-enabler-4395686/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Marriage Partner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage-partner-431855/) [Partner Encourager](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/partner-encourager-4395684/) [Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationships/)

## Related quotes

> [I once read that in any good marriage, one partner is the gardener and the other is the garden. We take it in turns…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meryl-streep/i-once-read-that-in-any-good-marriage-one-partner-is-the-gardener-and/)

[Meryl Streep](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meryl-streep/)

> [Maybe you once were excited about that person God supernaturally brought into your life as a marriage partner, but now all the excitement has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/maybe-you-once-were-excited-about-that-person-god-supernaturally/)

[Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/)

> [The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries on the contrary, a good marriage is one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/the-point-of-marriage-is-not-to-create-a-quick-commonality-by-tearing-2/)

[Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/)

> [Both men and women today see marriage not as a way of creating character and community but as a way to reach personal life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/timothy-keller/both-men-and-women-today-see-marriage-not-as-a-way-of-creating/)

[Timothy Keller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/timothy-keller/)

> [I couldn't bear a marriage in which one partner hinges on the other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clive-owen/i-couldn-t-bear-a-marriage-in-which-one-partner-hinges-on-the-other/)

[Clive Owen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clive-owen/)

> [In a marriage, you and your partner come first. And unless you and your partner are happy, that kid's never going to be happy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mila-kunis/in-a-marriage-you-and-your-partner-come-first-and-unless-you-and-your/)

[Mila Kunis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mila-kunis/)

> [“One excruciating problem faced by single women-more so in past generations than today-is caused by the unwritten rule of our society that allows men…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-c-sproul-2/one-excruciating-problem-faced-by-single-women-more-so-in-past/)

[R.C. Sproul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-c-sproul-2/)

> [In a marriage, you and your partner come first.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mila-kunis/in-a-marriage-you-and-your-partner-come-first/)

[Mila Kunis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mila-kunis/)

> [The marriage partner is not really the problem. No other person can ultimately make you happy. You must learn how to be happy within…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/the-marriage-partner-is-not-really-the-problem-no-other-person-can/)

[Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/)

> [“The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries; on the contrary, a good marriage is one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/the-point-of-marriage-is-not-to-create-a-quick-commonality-by-tearing/)

[Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/)

> [The public, more often than not, will forgive mistakes, but it will not forgive trying to wiggle out of one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-grizzard/the-public-more-often-than-not-will-forgive-mistakes-but-it-will-not/)

[Lewis Grizzard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-grizzard/)

> [Do what is given to you, and do it well, and you will have done enough...live together in the forgiveness of your sins. Forgive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/do-what-is-given-to-you-and-do-it-well-and-you-will-have-done-enough/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“So in practicing blanket forgiveness you first assume that in any current condition of pain or discomfort there is some anger involved, even if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/serge-kahili-king/so-in-practicing-blanket-forgiveness-you-first-assume-that-in-any/)

[Serge Kahili King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/serge-kahili-king/)

> [Forgiveness is not saying, What you did to me is okay. It is saying, Im not going to let what you did to me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nate/forgiveness-is-not-saying-what-you-did-to-me-is-okay-it-is-saying-im/)

[Nate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nate/)

> [“Lord I come before you, I repent all my sins; forgive me. I repent on behalf of my children forgive them Lord. Help them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/euginia-herlihy/lord-i-come-before-you-i-repent-all-my-sins-forgive-me-i-repent-on/)

[Euginia Herlihy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/euginia-herlihy/)

## More by H. Norman Wright

> [“Everyone has quirks of behavior and personality that at times irritate us. Yet in most cases the problem isn't that they are bad; its…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/everyone-has-quirks-of-behavior-and-personality-that-at-times/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“It is easier for most of us to affirm positive behavior than to deal with negative behavior in a positive way.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/it-is-easier-for-most-of-us-to-affirm-positive-behavior-than-to-deal/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“In a sense, you're also a sculptor fashioning the other party. The words and looks you use are the tools that leave imprints. Nurturing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-a-sense-you-re-also-a-sculptor-fashioning-the-other-party-the/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“trigger the same emotional, and resulting chemical, responses in the brain. Instead, the new thought actually creates activity in the neocortex—the thinking part of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/trigger-the-same-emotional-and-resulting-chemical-responses-in-the/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Instead, the new thought actually creates activity in the neocortex—the thinking part of the brain. Depressive thoughts activate the subcortex, the feeling part of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/instead-the-new-thought-actually-creates-activity-in-the-neocortex/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Is constructive criticism really constructive? Not really. You can't make a child better by pointing out what you think is wrong with him or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/is-constructive-criticism-really-constructive-not-really-you-can-t/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“worrying by following these tips: Don’t spend so much time thinking. Begin experiencing the world without the running commentary in your mind. Don’t take…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/worrying-by-following-these-tips-don-t-spend-so-much-time-thinking/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“In The Depression Cure, Ilardi writes: There’s evidence that depression can leave a toxic imprint on the brain. It can etch its way into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-the-depression-cure-ilardi-writes-there-s-evidence-that-depression/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Sometimes we disfigure ourselves by what we think about ourselves rather than by what we do to ourselves. Some people have been disfigured emotionally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/sometimes-we-disfigure-ourselves-by-what-we-think-about-ourselves/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [ “and restart. This time, put in realistic thoughts. Rewind your story and write a new ending. Determine a new outcome.\[91\]” ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/and-restart-this-time-put-in-realistic-thoughts-rewind-your-story-and/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“When you are depressed, you have a chemical imbalance in your brain. Thoughts trigger emotions, which dump an overload of stress chemicals into the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/when-you-are-depressed-you-have-a-chemical-imbalance-in-your-brain/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“When you are depressed, you have a chemical imbalance in your brain. Thoughts trigger emotions, which dump an overload of stress chemicals into the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/when-you-are-depressed-you-have-a-chemical-imbalance-in-your-brain-2/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Listening is a gift of spiritual significance that you can learn to give to others. When you listen, you give one a sense of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/listening-is-a-gift-of-spiritual-significance-that-you-can-learn-to/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Every person is different. Yet often, those differences are not understood or valued by others.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/every-person-is-different-yet-often-those-differences-are-not/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

> [“Convey nurturing messages both verbally and nonverbally. If you fill one's life with positive messages of their value to you and to God, they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/convey-nurturing-messages-both-verbally-and-nonverbally-if-you-fill/)

[H. Norman Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

[Explore all 18 H. Norman Wright quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/)

## More Forgiveness quotes

> [“Lord I come before you, I repent all my sins; forgive me. I repent on behalf of my children forgive them Lord. Help them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/euginia-herlihy/lord-i-come-before-you-i-repent-all-my-sins-forgive-me-i-repent-on/)

[Euginia Herlihy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/euginia-herlihy/)

> [Forgiveness is not saying, What you did to me is okay. It is saying, Im not going to let what you did to me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nate/forgiveness-is-not-saying-what-you-did-to-me-is-okay-it-is-saying-im/)

[Nate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nate/)

> [“So in practicing blanket forgiveness you first assume that in any current condition of pain or discomfort there is some anger involved, even if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/serge-kahili-king/so-in-practicing-blanket-forgiveness-you-first-assume-that-in-any/)

[Serge Kahili King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/serge-kahili-king/)

> [Do what is given to you, and do it well, and you will have done enough...live together in the forgiveness of your sins. Forgive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/do-what-is-given-to-you-and-do-it-well-and-you-will-have-done-enough/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [The public, more often than not, will forgive mistakes, but it will not forgive trying to wiggle out of one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-grizzard/the-public-more-often-than-not-will-forgive-mistakes-but-it-will-not/)

[Lewis Grizzard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-grizzard/)

> [A Real Boyfriend does the sweetest things randomly because he never wants her to feel unappreciated.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/enhance-dreams/a-real-boyfriend-does-the-sweetest-things-randomly-because-he-never/)

[Enhance Dreams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/enhance-dreams/)

> [“(Evil people) do not believe in forgiveness. Their transgressions are either punished or not punished. That is the only result that matters.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-mchugh/evil-people-do-not-believe-in-forgiveness-their-transgressions-are/)

[Daniel McHugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-mchugh/)

> [Friendship means understanding, not argument. it means forgiveness, not forgetting. it means the memories last, even if contact is lost.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sokhom/friendship-means-understanding-not-argument-it-means-forgiveness-not/)

[Sokhom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sokhom/)

> [Grace is the wonderful spirit that imbues every fiber of our being when we practice the fruits of the spirit: kindness, patience, understanding, forgiveness,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-cayce/grace-is-the-wonderful-spirit-that-imbues-every-fiber-of-our-being/)

[Edgar Cayce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-cayce/)

> [One of the most basic principles for making and keeping peace within and between nations. . . is that in political, military, moral, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-carter/one-of-the-most-basic-principles-for-making-and-keeping-peace-within/)

[Jimmy Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-carter/)

> [“Have an open mind and heart. Learn to journey in understanding and forgiveness. It's not always going to be easy but it will be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexandra-elle/have-an-open-mind-and-heart-learn-to-journey-in-understanding-and/)

[Alexandra Elle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexandra-elle/)

> [Forgive us our trespasses," says Margarethe, "and get out of our way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-maguire/forgive-us-our-trespasses-says-margarethe-and-get-out-of-our-way/)

[Gregory Maguire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-maguire/)

> [“ving self and others is an every second of every day of every week, of every month, of every year gift that should not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sanjo-jendayi/ving-self-and-others-is-an-every-second-of-every-day-of-every-week-of/)

[Sanjo Jendayi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sanjo-jendayi/)

> [Forgive yourself for not being the richest, the thinnest, the tallest, the one with the best hair. Forgive yourself for not being the most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-godin/forgive-yourself-for-not-being-the-richest-the-thinnest-the-tallest/)

[Seth Godin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-godin/)

> [If you can't forgive and forget, pick only one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-brault/if-you-can-t-forgive-and-forget-pick-only-one/)

[Robert Brault](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-brault/)

[Browse all 8,311 Forgiveness quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts, an enabler rather than a reformer.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "H. Norman Wright"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-encourager-rather-than-a-critic/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Forgiveness"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-encourager-rather-than-a-critic/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9cc/h-norman-wright-29195_forgiveness_in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-enc_2942815.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of…” — H. Norman Wright",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "H. Norman Wright",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-norman-wright/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "In marriage, each partner is to...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-encourager-rather-than-a-critic/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-norman-wright/in-marriage-each-partner-is-to-be-an-encourager-rather-than-a-critic/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
