---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The problem is, for men and women, the…"
description: "\"The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality is about dominance and submission, when, in fact, cooperation is a lot more fun, to put it m..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg"
---

#  The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality…

![“The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality is about dominance and submission, when, in fact, cooperation is a lot more fun, to put it my way. So some of it, a lot of it, is just about empathy.” quote by Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg)

> “The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality is about dominance and submission, when, in fact, cooperation is a lot more fun, to put it my way. So some of it, a lot of it, is just about empathy.”

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Sexual relationships thrive on mutual empathy rather than power dynamics.

**In simple terms:** Cooperation beats dominance in intimacy.

Key Takeaway

Cultivate empathy with partners.

Themes

relationships sexuality gender equality

Mood

reflective thoughtful

Type

philosophical social

When to use this quote

- dating
- long‑term partnership
- sexual education

Key Concepts

power dynamics empathy communication

Questions to Reflect On

- What role does empathy play in your intimate connections?
- Can power play coexist with mutual respect?

A Different Perspective

Some may view dominance as a consensual preference.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Cooperation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cooperation/) [Dominance And Submission](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dominance-and-submission/) [Empathy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/empathy/) [Facts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/facts/) [Fun](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fun/) [Ideas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ideas/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) [Men and women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men-and-women/) [Problem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/problem/) [Sexuality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sexuality/) [Submission](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/submission/)

## Related quotes

> [“What do you mean, dominance and submission?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sara-fawkes/what-do-you-mean-dominance-and-submission/)

Sara Fawkes

> [“Dominance and submission is an intimate binding. Those who submit must trust that those who dominate will never take more than they can give.”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-a-knight/dominance-and-submission-is-an-intimate-binding-those-who-submit-must/)

[Patricia A. Knight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-a-knight/)

> [“It’s up to you, Toby, always. But I suppose it comes down to whether you think dominance and submission are about acts or about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexis-hall/it-s-up-to-you-toby-always-but-i-suppose-it-comes-down-to-whether-you/)

[Alexis Hall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexis-hall/)

> [“Pain is not the most important tool in Dominance and submission, yet it is a most worthy tool. Pain breaks down barriers and defences.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikki-sex/pain-is-not-the-most-important-tool-in-dominance-and-submission-yet/)

[Nikki Sex](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikki-sex/)

> [“Male and female are created through the erotization of dominance and submission.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catharine-mackinnon/male-and-female-are-created-through-the-erotization-of-dominance-and/)

[Catharine MacKinnon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catharine-mackinnon/)

> [“Do you know about it, Kelsey?” he asked after a while. “Dominance and submission? This thing we’re doing? I don’t know so good how…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/annabel-joseph/do-you-know-about-it-kelsey-he-asked-after-a-while-dominance-and/)

[Annabel Joseph](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/annabel-joseph/)

> [“Sensuality is beautiful, and dominance and submission in the right context is a passionate art. A muse which ignites the flame of femininity, which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sai-marie-johnson/sensuality-is-beautiful-and-dominance-and-submission-in-the-right/)

[Sai Marie Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sai-marie-johnson/)

> [“The American idea of sexuality appears to be rooted in the American idea of masculinity. Idea may not be the precise word, for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-baldwin/the-american-idea-of-sexuality-appears-to-be-rooted-in-the-american/)

[James Baldwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-baldwin/)

> [Women and men are divided by gender, made into the sexes as we know them, by the social requirements of heterosexuality, which institutionalizes male…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catharine-mackinnon/women-and-men-are-divided-by-gender-made-into-the-sexes-as-we-know/)

[Catharine MacKinnon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catharine-mackinnon/)

> [I believe that the fundamental alternative for man is the choice between "life" and "death"; between creativity and destructive violence; between reality and illusions;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erich-fromm/i-believe-that-the-fundamental-alternative-for-man-is-the-choice/)

[Erich Fromm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erich-fromm/)

> [“Who am I to deny my Master pleasure, simply because it is not at the hands of myself? He is free to do as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/astrid-knowles/who-am-i-to-deny-my-master-pleasure-simply-because-it-is-not-at-the/)

Astrid Knowles

> [“The craft of a master is not imposing dominance, but winning submission.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ann-somerville/the-craft-of-a-master-is-not-imposing-dominance-but-winning-submission/)

[Ann Somerville](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ann-somerville/)

> [“Relinquishing control to another person is like death: it’s only scary until it finally happens.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/agnostic-zetetic/relinquishing-control-to-another-person-is-like-death-it-s-only-scary/)

Agnostic Zetetic

> [“I want to touch the parts of you no one else has touched. I want to own the piece of you that has yet…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/riley-murphy/i-want-to-touch-the-parts-of-you-no-one-else-has-touched-i-want-to/)

[Riley Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/riley-murphy/)

> [“I’m not going to deny that I want to fuck you. I can’t promise a future or that I’ll be some sniveling boyfriend who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/d-l-hess/i-m-not-going-to-deny-that-i-want-to-fuck-you-i-can-t-promise-a/)

[D.L. Hess](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/d-l-hess/)

## More by Gloria Steinem

> [People waste more time waiting for someone to take charge of their lives than they do in any other pursuit.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/people-waste-more-time-waiting-for-someone-to-take-charge-of-their/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Nothing will happen automatically. Change depends on what you and I do every day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/nothing-will-happen-automatically-change-depends-on-what-you-and-i-do/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Women are never again going to be mindless coffee-makers or mindless policy-makers in politics.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/women-are-never-again-going-to-be-mindless-coffee-makers-or-mindless/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [The state of female artists is very good. But the very definition of art has been biased in that 'art' was what men did…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/the-state-of-female-artists-is-very-good-but-the-very-definition-of/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [We will live to see the day that St. Patrick's Cathedral is a child-care center and the pope is no longer a disgrace to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/we-will-live-to-see-the-day-that-st-patrick-s-cathedral-is-a-child/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Just when you thought multi-nationals and crazed consumerism were too big to fight, along comes Naomi Klein with facts, spirit, and news of successful…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/just-when-you-thought-multi-nationals-and-crazed-consumerism-were-too/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [I don't know Beyoncé, but I have the impression that she's sincere, that she really is a feminist and wanted to put the word…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/i-don-t-know-beyonc-but-i-have-the-impression-that-she-s-sincere-that/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [I started out life as a writer, and writers write in part because they don't want to talk.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/i-started-out-life-as-a-writer-and-writers-write-in-part-because-they/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Proust's tea cake has nothing on one hour in a college dorm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/proust-s-tea-cake-has-nothing-on-one-hour-in-a-college-dorm/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Sadomasochiasm - which we know very well doesn't exist in societies that don't have child abuse - is regarded some sort of natural sexual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/sadomasochiasm-which-we-know-very-well-doesn-t-exist-in-societies/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Behave like everything you do matters.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/behave-like-everything-you-do-matters/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [“Part of traveling over years means coming back to the same place and knowing it for the first time.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/part-of-traveling-over-years-means-coming-back-to-the-same-place-and/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [If you say, I'm for equal pay, that's a reform. But if you say. I'm a feminist, that's a transformation of society.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/if-you-say-i-m-for-equal-pay-that-s-a-reform-but-if-you-say-i-m-a/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [I think that part of everybody's success is due to their looks, but it just works in different ways. If you're whatever society calls…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/i-think-that-part-of-everybody-s-success-is-due-to-their-looks-but-it/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

> [Of course, we can change. We're very adaptable. But it takes a while.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/of-course-we-can-change-we-re-very-adaptable-but-it-takes-a-while/)

[Gloria Steinem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

[Explore all 766 Gloria Steinem quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/)

## More Cooperation quotes

> [I wish I had played team sports. I think every kid should. Teamwork builds character - teaches people about leadership and cooperation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mo-rocca/i-wish-i-had-played-team-sports-i-think-every-kid-should-teamwork/)

[Mo Rocca](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mo-rocca/)

> [The U.S.-China relationship, of course, has elements of both cooperation and competition.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-e-donilon/the-u-s-china-relationship-of-course-has-elements-of-both-cooperation/)

[Thomas E. Donilon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-e-donilon/)

> [Every step by which an individual substitutes concerted action for isolated action results in an immediate and recognizable improvement in his conditions. The advantages…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ludwig-von-mises/every-step-by-which-an-individual-substitutes-concerted-action-for/)

[Ludwig von Mises](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ludwig-von-mises/)

> [We have to deal with where we are. We have to create cooperatives, we have to create intentional communities, we have to work for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-brown/we-have-to-deal-with-where-we-are-we-have-to-create-cooperatives-we/)

[Jerry Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-brown/)

> [Cooperation isn't the absence of conflict but a means of managing conflict.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deborah-tannen/cooperation-isn-t-the-absence-of-conflict-but-a-means-of-managing/)

[Deborah Tannen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deborah-tannen/)

> [We must never lose sight of the fact that we must take part in the development, not only of ourselves but of all humanity...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jewel/we-must-never-lose-sight-of-the-fact-that-we-must-take-part-in-the/)

[Jewel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jewel/)

> [Management means, in the last analysis, the substitution of thought for brawn and muscle, of knowledge for folkways and superstition, and of cooperation for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-drucker/management-means-in-the-last-analysis-the-substitution-of-thought-for/)

[Peter Drucker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-drucker/)

> [Women lead in ways different from men's. Men, I think, have been programmed to give orders. Women have been programmed to motivate people, to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/muriel-fox/women-lead-in-ways-different-from-men-s-men-i-think-have-been/)

[Muriel Fox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/muriel-fox/)

> [I sometimes try to imagine what would have happened if we’d known the bonobo first and the chimpanzee only later—or not at all. The…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frans-de-waal/i-sometimes-try-to-imagine-what-would-have-happened-if-we-d-known-the/)

[Frans de Waal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frans-de-waal/)

> [In spite of my great admiration for individual splendid talents I do not accept the star system. Collective creative effort is the root of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/constantin-stanislavski/in-spite-of-my-great-admiration-for-individual-splendid-talents-i-do/)

[Constantin Stanislavski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/constantin-stanislavski/)

> [The peace we seek, founded upon decent trust and cooperation among nations, can be fortified not by weapons of war but by wheat and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dwight-d-eisenhower/the-peace-we-seek-founded-upon-decent-trust-and-cooperation-among/)

[Dwight D. Eisenhower](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dwight-d-eisenhower/)

> [The main achievement of economics is that it has provided a theory of peaceful human cooperation. This is why the harbingers of violent conflict…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ludwig-von-mises/the-main-achievement-of-economics-is-that-it-has-provided-a-theory-of/)

[Ludwig von Mises](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ludwig-von-mises/)

> [The war in Iraq is a rare opportunity to move toward an historic period of cooperation. Out of these troubled times a new world…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/the-war-in-iraq-is-a-rare-opportunity-to-move-toward-an-historic/)

[George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/)

> [We also exchange oil for software technology. Uruguay is one of the biggest producers of software. We are breaking with the neoliberal model. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hugo-chavez/we-also-exchange-oil-for-software-technology-uruguay-is-one-of-the/)

[Hugo Chavez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hugo-chavez/)

> [It is true that the virtues which are less esteemed and practiced now--independence, self-reliance, and the willingness to bear risks, the readiness to back…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/friedrich-august-von-hayek/it-is-true-that-the-virtues-which-are-less-esteemed-and-practiced-now/)

[Friedrich August von Hayek](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/friedrich-august-von-hayek/)

[Browse all 942 Cooperation quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cooperation/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality is about dominance and submission, when, in fact, cooperation is a lot more fun, to put it my way. So some of it, a lot of it, is just about empathy.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Gloria Steinem"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-idea-that-sexuality-is-about/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Cooperation"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-idea-that-sexuality-is-about/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63b/gloria-steinem-277_cooperation_the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-ide_1105321.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“The problem is, for men and women, the idea that sexuality is about dominance and submission, when, in fact…” — Gloria Steinem",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Gloria Steinem",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-steinem/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "The problem is, for men and...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-idea-that-sexuality-is-about/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-steinem/the-problem-is-for-men-and-women-the-idea-that-sexuality-is-about/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
