--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: There is an unfair responsibility that…" description: "\"“There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an only child - you grow up knowing you aren't allowed to disappoint, you're not even allowed ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/69a/gillian-flynn-316_children_there-is-an-unfair-responsibility-that-c_3040217.jpg" --- # There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an… ![“There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an only child - you grow up knowing you aren't allowed to disappoint, you're not even allowed to die. There isn't a replacement toddling around; you're it. It makes you desperate to be flawless, and it also makes you drunk with the power. In…” quote by Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/69a/gillian-flynn-316_children_there-is-an-unfair-responsibility-that-c_3040217.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/69a/gillian-flynn-316_children_there-is-an-unfair-responsibility-that-c_3040217.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/69a/gillian-flynn-316_children_there-is-an-unfair-responsibility-that-c_3040217.jpg) > ““There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an only child - you grow up knowing you aren't allowed to disappoint, you're not even allowed to die. There isn't a replacement toddling around; you're it. It makes you desperate to be flawless, and it also makes you drunk with the power. In such ways are despots made.”” [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Being an only child creates intense pressure to be perfect, fostering a dangerous sense of power that can lead to authoritarian behavior. **In simple terms:** Only children may feel extreme pressure to be flawless. Key Takeaway Balance expectations with self‑compassion. Themes family pressure perfectionism power dynamics Mood tense reflective Type psychological cautionary When to use this quote - family counseling - personal development - leadership training - mental health support Key Concepts psychology parenting authoritarianism Questions to Reflect On - How does sibling presence affect personal pressure? - What strategies reduce the fear of failure? A Different Perspective Perfectionism can cause burnout and resentment. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Despots](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/despots/) ## Related quotes > [“There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an only child - you grow up knowing you aren't allowed to disappoint, you're not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/there-is-an-unfair-responsibility-that-comes-with-being-an-only-child/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“I do not fear death if I am allowed to die on my own terms.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-gray-calvert/i-do-not-fear-death-if-i-am-allowed-to-die-on-my-own-terms/) [Michael Gray Calvert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-gray-calvert/) > [“The scary part is not being allowed to die for what you're living for. That's the problem”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-robertson/the-scary-part-is-not-being-allowed-to-die-for-what-you-re-living-for/) Ray Robertson > [I watched a bunch of kids movies on Christmas. I was kind of joking with our family by asking, "Is anyone allowed to die…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-saunders/i-watched-a-bunch-of-kids-movies-on-christmas-i-was-kind-of-joking/) [George Saunders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-saunders/) > [“Dead, but not allowed to die. Alive, but as good as dead.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/dead-but-not-allowed-to-die-alive-but-as-good-as-dead/) [Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/) > [Children who die young are some of our greatest teachers. We are allowed to die when we have taught what we came to teach…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elisabeth-kubler-ross/children-who-die-young-are-some-of-our-greatest-teachers-we-are/) [Elisabeth Kubler-Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elisabeth-kubler-ross/) > [“Trapped for days, years, centuries maybe. Dead, but not allowed to die. Alive, but as good as dead.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/trapped-for-days-years-centuries-maybe-dead-but-not-allowed-to-die-2/) [Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/) > [“Just as I allowed them to live in my mind, I allowed them to die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-sobon/just-as-i-allowed-them-to-live-in-my-mind-i-allowed-them-to-die/) [Nicole Sobon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-sobon/) > [Trapped for days, years, centuries maybe. Dead, but not allowed to die. Alive, but as good as dead. So alone that anyone, anything no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/trapped-for-days-years-centuries-maybe-dead-but-not-allowed-to-die/) [Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/) > [“No one here is allowed to die without my permission.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-macleod/no-one-here-is-allowed-to-die-without-my-permission/) [Doug MacLeod](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-macleod/) > [“if life is such a painful experience and we can’t change that, why can’t this person just be allowed to die?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jo-nesb/if-life-is-such-a-painful-experience-and-we-can-t-change-that-why-can/) [Jo Nesbø](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jo-nesb/) > [Donald Trump ought to realise that being a president is different to being a candidate and that there is a responsibility that comes with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julian-castro/donald-trump-ought-to-realise-that-being-a-president-is-different-to/) [Julian Castro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julian-castro/) > [I think of a hero as someone who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with his freedom.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-dylan/i-think-of-a-hero-as-someone-who-understands-the-degree-of/) [Bob Dylan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-dylan/) > [“With great responsibility comes great power.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-manson/with-great-responsibility-comes-great-power/) [Mark Manson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-manson/) > [“With great power comes great responsibility.” It is true. But there’s a better version of this quote, a version that actually is profound, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-manson/with-great-power-comes-great-responsibility-it-is-true-but-there-s-a/) [Mark Manson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-manson/) ## More by Gillian Flynn > [“Our kind of love can go into remission, but it's always waiting to return. Like the world sweetest cancer.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/our-kind-of-love-can-go-into-remission-but-it-s-always-waiting-to/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [The midwest is great because it hasn't been entirely claimed. There's more room to write about it; it's harder to write about New York,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/the-midwest-is-great-because-it-hasn-t-been-entirely-claimed-there-s/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“Sometimes it is all too loud.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/sometimes-it-is-all-too-loud/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“My thank-yous always come out rather labored. I often don't give them at all. People do what they're supposed to do and then wait…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/my-thank-yous-always-come-out-rather-labored-i-often-don-t-give-them/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [There’s something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/there-s-something-disturbing-about-recalling-a-warm-memory-and/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“My life has begun to feel like an epilogue.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/my-life-has-begun-to-feel-like-an-epilogue/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“The Victorians, especially southern Victorians, needed a lot of room to stray away from each other, to duck tuberculosis and flu, to avoid rapacious…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/the-victorians-especially-southern-victorians-needed-a-lot-of-room-to/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“You think: Oh, here is the rest of my life. It’s finally arrived.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/you-think-oh-here-is-the-rest-of-my-life-it-s-finally-arrived/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [What a generous thing that is, I realize, for a husband to try to make his wife laugh.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/what-a-generous-thing-that-is-i-realize-for-a-husband-to-try-to-make/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [I am a great believer in jobs for teens. 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I used to see men - friends, coworkers, strangers - giddy over these awful pretender women,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/for-a-long-time-cool-girl-offended-me-i-used-to-see-men-friends/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) [Explore all 668 Gillian Flynn quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) ## More Children quotes > [I am certain that children always know more than they are able to tell, and that makes the big difference between them and adults,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacques-lusseyran/i-am-certain-that-children-always-know-more-than-they-are-able-to/) [Jacques Lusseyran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacques-lusseyran/) > [Behind every successful child is an adult who believed in him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-warren/behind-every-successful-child-is-an-adult-who-believed-in-him/) [Rick Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-warren/) > [I believe in freedom to do what you want if you aren't hurting others, but pictures of obese protesters giving their children big gulps.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-defranco/i-believe-in-freedom-to-do-what-you-want-if-you-aren-t-hurting-others/) [Philip DeFranco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-defranco/) > [If the audience likes your work, if they like you, they don't think whether you are married or have children or not. I made…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dimple-kapadia/if-the-audience-likes-your-work-if-they-like-you-they-don-t-think/) [Dimple Kapadia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dimple-kapadia/) > [It doesnt seem to me strange that children should like the macabre, the sensational, and the forbidden.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-hecht/it-doesnt-seem-to-me-strange-that-children-should-like-the-macabre/) [Anthony Hecht](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-hecht/) > [Let children support their parents or be imprisoned.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/let-children-support-their-parents-or-be-imprisoned/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Gratitude isn't just a feeling, it's an action. Expressing gratitude by writing in a journal, taking a photo, or shooting a video creates a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janice-kaplan/gratitude-isn-t-just-a-feeling-it-s-an-action-expressing-gratitude-by/) [Janice Kaplan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janice-kaplan/) > [My embarrassing confession is that my father is a 'Camelot: The Musical' obsessive. So as a child, when we were going to visit relatives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-chibnall/my-embarrassing-confession-is-that-my-father-is-a-camelot-the-musical/) [Chris Chibnall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-chibnall/) > [I have many who keep me going, I am very fortunate in this sense. There is nothing like a child who knows more about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/floyd-cooper/i-have-many-who-keep-me-going-i-am-very-fortunate-in-this-sense-there/) [Floyd Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/floyd-cooper/) > [My school was one of the most beautiful places a child can grow up in. You are surrounded by nature - cats, dogs, birds…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amala-akkineni/my-school-was-one-of-the-most-beautiful-places-a-child-can-grow-up-in/) [Amala Akkineni](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amala-akkineni/) > [A lesser complaint: hair extensions. There are moments on 'All My Children' when half the women actors, young and old, seem to be afflicted…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/camille-paglia/a-lesser-complaint-hair-extensions-there-are-moments-on-all-my/) [Camille Paglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/camille-paglia/) > [As a child, I had a lot of older gay men taking care of me. There's a trust there. I feel like little girls…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-cho/as-a-child-i-had-a-lot-of-older-gay-men-taking-care-of-me-there-s-a/) [Margaret Cho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-cho/) > [If my child had prejudice in his head, I'd be ashamed. 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