--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut…" description: "\"“If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter,”\" — Gillian Flynn" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg" --- # If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter, ![“If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter,” quote by Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg) > ““If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter,”” [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A vulgar, hyperbolic expression of sexual frustration and desire for absurdity. **In simple terms:** Explicitly humorous sexual frustration. Key Takeaway Recognize the absurdity and avoid vulgarity. Themes humor sexuality absurdity Mood irreverent provocative Type satire humor When to use this quote - casual conversation - online memes - stand‑up comedy - creative writing Key Concepts hyperbole frustration Questions to Reflect On - Is this humor effective or off‑putting? - How does shock value affect reception? A Different Perspective May offend or alienate audiences. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Dick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dick/) [Dick Fuck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dick-fuck-1221597/) [Fuck Peanut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fuck-peanut-1141458/) [Peanut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/peanut/) [Peanut butter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/peanut-butter/) ## Related quotes > [“Go didn't like grilled cheese; she was scooping peanut butter out of the jar onto saltines. When a commercial break came on, she paused…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/go-didn-t-like-grilled-cheese-she-was-scooping-peanut-butter-out-of/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [Lifes like a dick, fuck it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/lifes-like-a-dick-fuck-it/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“And it’s the only whorehouse in town. They say if you can sprout up twelve inches of dick you get to fuck free.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/larry-mcmurtry/and-it-s-the-only-whorehouse-in-town-they-say-if-you-can-sprout-up/) [Larry McMurtry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/larry-mcmurtry/) > [If you don't like me cut your dick and fuck yourself](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katleho/if-you-don-t-like-me-cut-your-dick-and-fuck-yourself/) [Katleho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katleho/) > [I didn't know that my son had allergies until he spit up eggs one day, and one day he had a little peanut butter…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kym-whitley/i-didn-t-know-that-my-son-had-allergies-until-he-spit-up-eggs-one-day/) [Kym Whitley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kym-whitley/) > [I must admit - I don't really like peanut butter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-morocco/i-must-admit-i-don-t-really-like-peanut-butter/) [Chris Morocco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-morocco/) > [The act of exercising at 6 A.M. really helped me. It made me not dread the workout part of my day all day long.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marissa-jaret-winokur/the-act-of-exercising-at-6-a-m-really-helped-me-it-made-me-not-dread/) [Marissa Jaret Winokur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marissa-jaret-winokur/) > [I'm obsessed with peanut butter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chrishell-stause/i-m-obsessed-with-peanut-butter/) [Chrishell Stause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chrishell-stause/) > [Ah-la peanut-butter sandwiches!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/the-amazing-mumferd/ah-la-peanut-butter-sandwiches/) [The Amazing Mumferd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/the-amazing-mumferd/) > [“Peanut butter is my frenemy.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/coco-j-ginger/peanut-butter-is-my-frenemy/) [Coco J. Ginger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/coco-j-ginger/) > [I hate how people aren't peanut butter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikhil-saluja/i-hate-how-people-aren-t-peanut-butter/) [Nikhil Saluja](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikhil-saluja/) > [I had peanut butter once. It was awful.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/grumpy-cat/i-had-peanut-butter-once-it-was-awful/) [Grumpy Cat](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/grumpy-cat/) > [There are no more white linen sofas in my house. We have a rule here: Anything below 36 inches has to be brown or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/candice-olson/there-are-no-more-white-linen-sofas-in-my-house-we-have-a-rule-here/) [Candice Olson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/candice-olson/) > [Peanut butter - the pâté of childhood.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/florence-fabricant/peanut-butter-the-p-t-of-childhood/) [Florence Fabricant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/florence-fabricant/) > [“FACT: One pound of peanut butter can contain up to 150 bug fragments and 5 rodent hairs. Up to 150. That means there could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cary-mcneal/fact-one-pound-of-peanut-butter-can-contain-up-to-150-bug-fragments/) [Cary McNeal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cary-mcneal/) ## More by Gillian Flynn > [“Our kind of love can go into remission, but it's always waiting to return. Like the world sweetest cancer.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/our-kind-of-love-can-go-into-remission-but-it-s-always-waiting-to/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [The midwest is great because it hasn't been entirely claimed. There's more room to write about it; it's harder to write about New York,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/the-midwest-is-great-because-it-hasn-t-been-entirely-claimed-there-s/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“Sometimes it is all too loud.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/sometimes-it-is-all-too-loud/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“My thank-yous always come out rather labored. I often don't give them at all. People do what they're supposed to do and then wait…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/my-thank-yous-always-come-out-rather-labored-i-often-don-t-give-them/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [There’s something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/there-s-something-disturbing-about-recalling-a-warm-memory-and/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“My life has begun to feel like an epilogue.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/my-life-has-begun-to-feel-like-an-epilogue/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“The Victorians, especially southern Victorians, needed a lot of room to stray away from each other, to duck tuberculosis and flu, to avoid rapacious…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/the-victorians-especially-southern-victorians-needed-a-lot-of-room-to/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“You think: Oh, here is the rest of my life. It’s finally arrived.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/you-think-oh-here-is-the-rest-of-my-life-it-s-finally-arrived/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [What a generous thing that is, I realize, for a husband to try to make his wife laugh.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/what-a-generous-thing-that-is-i-realize-for-a-husband-to-try-to-make/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [I am a great believer in jobs for teens. They teach important life lessons, build character, and inflict just the right amount of humiliation…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/i-am-a-great-believer-in-jobs-for-teens-they-teach-important-life/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“you'd literally lie, cheat, and steal -hell, kill- to convince people you are a good guy”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/you-d-literally-lie-cheat-and-steal-hell-kill-to-convince-people-you/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [My imagination is more tweaked by imagining the lives of the people who were there before us. I don't need to give myself the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/my-imagination-is-more-tweaked-by-imagining-the-lives-of-the-people/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“Given my druthers now, I’d prefer a snapshot of Warren Harding’s wife, “the Duchess,” who recorded the smallest offenses in a little red notebook…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/given-my-druthers-now-i-d-prefer-a-snapshot-of-warren-harding-s-wife/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [A town so suffocating and small, you tripped over people you hated every day. People who knew things about you. It's the kind of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/a-town-so-suffocating-and-small-you-tripped-over-people-you-hated/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) > [“For a long time Cool Girl offended me. I used to see men - friends, coworkers, strangers - giddy over these awful pretender women,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/for-a-long-time-cool-girl-offended-me-i-used-to-see-men-friends/) [Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) [Explore all 668 Gillian Flynn quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/) ## More Dick quotes > [Aye girl, you hungry? How bout some Dick-fil-A?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kingsley/aye-girl-you-hungry-how-bout-some-dick-fil-a/) [Kingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kingsley/) > [U aint never seen a long dick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-hart/u-aint-never-seen-a-long-dick/) [Kevin Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-hart/) > [“You broke up with me, and I spend one night with one guy who turns out to be the reason I’m even here, in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tere-michaels/you-broke-up-with-me-and-i-spend-one-night-with-one-guy-who-turns-out/) [Tere Michaels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tere-michaels/) > [“I told you. I'm always hard for you, I'm just good at hiding it. Which, actually, isn't easy when your dick is the size…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karina-halle/i-told-you-i-m-always-hard-for-you-i-m-just-good-at-hiding-it-which/) [Karina Halle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karina-halle/) > [You looking for a dick punch?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hank-moody/you-looking-for-a-dick-punch/) [Hank Moody](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hank-moody/) > [“His cock was beautiful. He had low hanging balls. His dick, which was long like the rest of him, was standing proud. The skin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-cox/his-cock-was-beautiful-he-had-low-hanging-balls-his-dick-which-was/) [James Cox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-cox/) > [“I hope your dick gets whore poisoning and shrivels to its death! And then I hope all the girls see it and laugh at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-mclean/i-hope-your-dick-gets-whore-poisoning-and-shrivels-to-its-death-and/) [Jay McLean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-mclean/) > [What up haters I'm back so how's my dick taste.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sammy-adams/what-up-haters-i-m-back-so-how-s-my-dick-taste/) [Sammy Adams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sammy-adams/) > [“Be true to your Dick.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vladimir-nabokov/be-true-to-your-dick/) [Vladimir Nabokov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vladimir-nabokov/) > [Damn I'm on my own dick/ i dont see nobody blinded by my own shit/ i dont need nobody, I'm grindin out in my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kr/damn-i-m-on-my-own-dick-i-dont-see-nobody-blinded-by-my-own-shit-i/) [KR](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kr/) > [If I had a dick I would pull it out and piss on em .](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicki-minaj/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-pull-it-out-and-piss-on-em/) [Nicki Minaj](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicki-minaj/) > [“It being the first time in his life that he had touched female fingers under water, Dick duly registered the sensation as rather a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/it-being-the-first-time-in-his-life-that-he-had-touched-female/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“You could take the entirety of the common sense of humans and put it in the palm of your hand and still have room…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-carson/you-could-take-the-entirety-of-the-common-sense-of-humans-and-put-it/) [Anne Carson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-carson/) > [“We're testing each other. Seeing how far we can take this before something snaps. Most likely my dick.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-mclean/we-re-testing-each-other-seeing-how-far-we-can-take-this-before/) [Jay McLean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-mclean/) > [“I thought you seemed a lot nicer lately. Dick will do that. Thank god, too, because you’re usually one mood swing away from snapping…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ebony-brewer/i-thought-you-seemed-a-lot-nicer-lately-dick-will-do-that-thank-god/) [Ebony Brewer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ebony-brewer/) [Browse all 475 Dick quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dick/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter,”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gillian Flynn" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut-butter/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Dick" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut-butter/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c6/gillian-flynn-316_dick_if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut_487723.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If I had a dick, I would fuck this peanut butter,” — Gillian Flynn", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Gillian Flynn", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“If I had a dick, I...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut-butter/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-fuck-this-peanut-butter/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```