--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I wrote this book [ Desperate Marriages]…" description: "\"I wrote this book [ Desperate Marriages] because of my own marriage. My wife and I struggled greatly in the early years of marriage. In spite of the fa..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66d/gary-chapman-1325_book_i-wrote-this-book-desperate-marriages-be_209297.png" --- # I wrote this book \[ Desperate Marriages\] because of my own… ![“I wrote this book [ Desperate Marriages] because of my own marriage. My wife and I struggled greatly in the early years of marriage. In spite of the fact that we were Christians before we got married, we prayed about getting married, we believed it was God's will for us to get married, and we…” quote by Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66d/gary-chapman-1325_book_i-wrote-this-book-desperate-marriages-be_209297.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66d/gary-chapman-1325_book_i-wrote-this-book-desperate-marriages-be_209297.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66d/gary-chapman-1325_book_i-wrote-this-book-desperate-marriages-be_209297.png) > “I wrote this book \[ Desperate Marriages\] because of my own marriage. My wife and I struggled greatly in the early years of marriage. In spite of the fact that we were Christians before we got married, we prayed about getting married, we believed it was God's will for us to get married, and we still had great struggles.” [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The author wrote the book to share personal struggles in early marriage despite shared faith, highlighting that belief alone doesn’t guarantee ease. **In simple terms:** Personal marriage challenges motivated the book. Key Takeaway Seek help early in marriage. Themes marriage faith struggles growth Mood reflective hopeful Type advice personal narrative When to use this quote - early marriage counseling - faith discussions - marriage workshops - personal testimony Key Concepts Christian marriage relationship counseling Questions to Reflect On - How can couples combine faith with practical skills? - What resources help when belief feels insufficient? A Different Perspective Faith alone may not resolve deep relational issues. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Book](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/book/) [Books](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/books/) [Christian](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/christian/) [Christianity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/christianity/) [Desperate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/desperate/) [Facts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/facts/) [Getting married](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/getting-married/) [God 's will](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/god-s-will/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Spite](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/spite/) [Struggle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/struggle/) [Wife](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wife/) [Years of marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/years-of-marriage/) ## Related quotes > [ This book \[Desperate Marriages \] is really a book on how to be a positive change agent in a very, very difficult marriage. I… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/this-book-desperate-marriages-is-really-a-book-on-how-to-be-a/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [Oh, I've had terrible, terrible relationships! The fact that I ever got happily married to a great, normal man is kind of a miracle.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-leavitt/oh-i-ve-had-terrible-terrible-relationships-the-fact-that-i-ever-got/) [Caroline Leavitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-leavitt/) > [I didn't need to get married again. It's great to be in a situation in which you're happy. But, you know, I'm not tortured…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/franca-sozzani/i-didn-t-need-to-get-married-again-it-s-great-to-be-in-a-situation-in/) [Franca Sozzani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/franca-sozzani/) > [“In all of his products, technology would be married to great design, elegance, human touches and even romance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walter-isaacson/in-all-of-his-products-technology-would-be-married-to-great-design/) [Walter Isaacson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walter-isaacson/) > [I've had an absolutely charmed life in every aspect of it. I do for my job what I would do for a hobby if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/graeme-base/i-ve-had-an-absolutely-charmed-life-in-every-aspect-of-it-i-do-for-my/) [Graeme Base](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/graeme-base/) > [I have nothing against getting married. It's a great thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nadine-coyle/i-have-nothing-against-getting-married-it-s-a-great-thing/) [Nadine Coyle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nadine-coyle/) > [I am sober, grounded, focused, I'm writing again, I like where I am. I'm real positive and I got this great family that came…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-walsh/i-am-sober-grounded-focused-i-m-writing-again-i-like-where-i-am-i-m/) [Joe Walsh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-walsh/) > [Let us be very strange and well-bred:Let us be as strange as if we had been married a great while;And as well-bred as if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-congreve/let-us-be-very-strange-and-well-bred-let-us-be-as-strange-as-if-we/) [William Congreve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-congreve/) > [I love being married. Its so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/i-love-being-married-its-so-great-to-find-one-special-person-you-want/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/love-being-married-it-s-so-great-to-find-that-one-special-person-you/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Valerie saw Cesaire's eyes resting upon Suzette's reclining form. Valerie wondered whether he really saw her there anymore. After eighteen years of marriage, Cesaire…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catherine-hardwicke/valerie-saw-cesaire-s-eyes-resting-upon-suzette-s-reclining-form/) [Catherine Hardwicke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catherine-hardwicke/) > [My kids have moved more in their twenties, you know, than my parents have moved in nearly 40-something years of marriage before they died.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-huckabee/my-kids-have-moved-more-in-their-twenties-you-know-than-my-parents/) [Mike Huckabee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-huckabee/) > [“OLD JOKE Sadie and Moishe go to see a lawyer. “What can I do for you, folks?” Moishe: “We want a divorce.” “Well, this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-grunwald/old-joke-sadie-and-moishe-go-to-see-a-lawyer-what-can-i-do-for-you/) [Lisa Grunwald](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-grunwald/) > [The first year of marriage is like wet cement](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-wolgemuth/the-first-year-of-marriage-is-like-wet-cement/) Robert Wolgemuth > [“After about 20 years of marriage, I think I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of what women want. And I think the answer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mel-gibson/after-about-20-years-of-marriage-i-think-i-m-finally-starting-to/) [Mel Gibson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mel-gibson/) ## More by Gary Chapman > [Marriages are always moving from one season to another. Sometimes we find ourselves in winter--discouraged, detached, and dissatisfied; other times we experience springtime, with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/marriages-are-always-moving-from-one-season-to-another-sometimes-we/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [Something in our nature cries out to be loved by another. Isolation is devastating to the human psyche. That is why solitary confinement is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/something-in-our-nature-cries-out-to-be-loved-by-another-isolation-is/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [Most of us have more potential than we will ever develop. What holds us back is often a lack of courage.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/most-of-us-have-more-potential-than-we-will-ever-develop-what-holds/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [On the other hand, if I walk in the house, I don't even bother to find her, I just walk in the den and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/on-the-other-hand-if-i-walk-in-the-house-i-don-t-even-bother-to-find/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [“I look for three things in hiring people. The first is personal integrity, the second is intelligence, and the third is a high energy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/i-look-for-three-things-in-hiring-people-the-first-is-personal/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [Love is always freely given. Love cannot be demanded. We can request things of each other, but we must never demand anything. Requests give…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/love-is-always-freely-given-love-cannot-be-demanded-we-can-request/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [“Psychologist William James said that possibly the deepest human need is the need to feel appreciated.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/psychologist-william-james-said-that-possibly-the-deepest-human-need/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [I think that in today's world, by nature, we are all self-centered. And that often leads to selfishness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/i-think-that-in-today-s-world-by-nature-we-are-all-self-centered-and/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [Sometimes when the spouse is really the culprit, it is hard to admit what you consider your little failures, but if you are going…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/sometimes-when-the-spouse-is-really-the-culprit-it-is-hard-to-admit/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [“There is a third truth, which only the mature lover will be able to hear. My spouse’s criticisms about my behavior provide me with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/there-is-a-third-truth-which-only-the-mature-lover-will-be-able-to/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [ The getting out part \[of advise\] may well be true. Because if you have tried the tender love thing... typically the abuser is not… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/the-getting-out-part-of-advise-may-well-be-true-because-if-you-have/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [As a senior in high school, I had a strong sense that God wanted me in some kind of ministry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/as-a-senior-in-high-school-i-had-a-strong-sense-that-god-wanted-me-in/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [We all desperately need love. If a spouse in a difficult marriage will learn the love language of that spouse, and they will, with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/we-all-desperately-need-love-if-a-spouse-in-a-difficult-marriage-will/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [“If acts of service do not come naturally for you, it is still a love language worth acquiring. It is a way of expressing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/if-acts-of-service-do-not-come-naturally-for-you-it-is-still-a-love/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) > [“The best thing we can do with the failures of the past is to let them be history. Yes, it happened. Certainly it hurt.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-chapman/the-best-thing-we-can-do-with-the-failures-of-the-past-is-to-let-them/) [Gary Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) [Explore all 254 Gary Chapman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-chapman/) ## More Book quotes > [I think a new world will arise out of the religious mists when we approach our Bible with the idea that it is not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aiden-wilson-tozer/i-think-a-new-world-will-arise-out-of-the-religious-mists-when-we/) [Aiden Wilson Tozer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aiden-wilson-tozer/) > [If I had a dollar for every time I couldn’t sleep, I could buy a billion locks and finally read a book in peace.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aesop-rock/if-i-had-a-dollar-for-every-time-i-couldn-t-sleep-i-could-buy-a/) [Aesop Rock](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aesop-rock/) > [Young men, especially in America, write to me and ask me to recommend “a course of reading.” Distrust a course of reading! People who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-lang/young-men-especially-in-america-write-to-me-and-ask-me-to-recommend-a/) [Andrew Lang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-lang/) > [The Rosary is the book of the blind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fulton-j-sheen/the-rosary-is-the-book-of-the-blind/) [Fulton J. Sheen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fulton-j-sheen/) > [I have many who keep me going, I am very fortunate in this sense. There is nothing like a child who knows more about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/floyd-cooper/i-have-many-who-keep-me-going-i-am-very-fortunate-in-this-sense-there/) [Floyd Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/floyd-cooper/) > [I think books in which people are really happy and things are going well are probably the most challenging novels there are to write,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-quindlen/i-think-books-in-which-people-are-really-happy-and-things-are-going/) [Anna Quindlen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-quindlen/) > [It's like the query letter problem that I just mentioned, magnified a hundredfold. You might be good at telling a story, but that doesn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patrick-rothfuss/it-s-like-the-query-letter-problem-that-i-just-mentioned-magnified-a/) [Patrick Rothfuss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patrick-rothfuss/) > [I don't think I have made as much of my life as I should have. I should have written more books.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-m-schlesinger-jr/i-don-t-think-i-have-made-as-much-of-my-life-as-i-should-have-i/) [Arthur M. Schlesinger, Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-m-schlesinger-jr/) > [Some books are not read in the right way because they have skipped a stage of opinion, assume a crystallization of information in society…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/some-books-are-not-read-in-the-right-way-because-they-have-skipped-a/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [“People talk about books that write themselves, and it's a lie. Books don't write themselves. 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