--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Some parents were awful back then and are…" description: "\"Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The process of raising you didn't turn them into grown-ups. Parents who were clearly imperfect c..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg" --- # Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The… ![“Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The process of raising you didn't turn them into grown-ups. Parents who were clearly imperfect can be helpful to you. As you were trying to grow up despite their fumbling efforts, you had to develop skills and tolerances other kids missed out…” quote by Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg) > “Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The process of raising you didn't turn them into grown-ups. Parents who were clearly imperfect can be helpful to you. As you were trying to grow up despite their fumbling efforts, you had to develop skills and tolerances other kids missed out on. Some of the strongest people I know grew up taking care of inept, invalid, or psychotic parents--but they know the parents weren't normal, healthy, or whole.” [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Children of imperfect parents often develop resilience and unique coping skills because they must compensate for parental shortcomings. **In simple terms:** Growing up with flawed parents builds strength and adaptability. Key Takeaway Cultivate self‑reliance and empathy. Themes resilience family dynamics personal growth Mood reflective hopeful Type advice inspirational When to use this quote - parenting challenges - self‑development - support groups - therapy sessions Key Concepts psychology attachment theory self‑efficacy Questions to Reflect On - How have you turned parental flaws into personal strengths? - What support helped you cope with parental inadequacy? A Different Perspective Not all children can turn adversity into strength without external support. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Care](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/care/) [Effort](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/effort/) [Growing up](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/growing-up/) [Kids](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/kids/) [Parent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parent/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Process](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/process/) [Skills](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/skills/) [Tolerance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/tolerance/) ## Related quotes > [I think it's helpful for kids to know that their parents weren't perfect, that they messed up and learned from their mistakes. So be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-yoffe/i-think-it-s-helpful-for-kids-to-know-that-their-parents-weren-t/) [Emily Yoffe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-yoffe/) > [Always make sure to treat your parents with respect to make up for the years of hell you put them through as an adolescent.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melchor-lim/always-make-sure-to-treat-your-parents-with-respect-to-make-up-for/) [Melchor Lim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melchor-lim/) > [I get so sick and tired of hearing people gripe about what their parents did to them. You know what your parents did to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-buscaglia/i-get-so-sick-and-tired-of-hearing-people-gripe-about-what-their/) [Leo Buscaglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-buscaglia/) > [I'm famous by default. I came out of the womb, and people wanted to know who I was because of my parents.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frances-bean-cobain/i-m-famous-by-default-i-came-out-of-the-womb-and-people-wanted-to/) [Frances Bean Cobain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frances-bean-cobain/) > [In many Asian households, to not go on to higher education, that's like a big no-no. I know my parents' discouragement was for my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandra-oh/in-many-asian-households-to-not-go-on-to-higher-education-that-s-like/) [Sandra Oh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandra-oh/) > [Growing up, I didn't know my parents were famous. I just thought they knew everybody. Everyone was always saying, 'Hi, Billy,' 'Hi, Christie.' I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexa-ray-joel/growing-up-i-didn-t-know-my-parents-were-famous-i-just-thought-they/) [Alexa Ray Joel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexa-ray-joel/) > [Now, Max, I think we both know your parents aren't missionaries." I opened my eyes wide. "No? Well, for God's sake, don't tell them.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-patterson/now-max-i-think-we-both-know-your-parents-aren-t-missionaries-i/) [James Patterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-patterson/) > [Let me be clear: All I really care about is my kids know that their parents love them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kenneth-c-griffin/let-me-be-clear-all-i-really-care-about-is-my-kids-know-that-their/) [Kenneth C. Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kenneth-c-griffin/) > [I know that my parents are proud of me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myron-rolle/i-know-that-my-parents-are-proud-of-me/) [Myron Rolle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myron-rolle/) > [There are four people in my life, not counting my reps who know everything, two of whom are my parents, that know everything, so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/natalie-zea/there-are-four-people-in-my-life-not-counting-my-reps-who-know/) [Natalie Zea](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/natalie-zea/) > [ Decent responsible parents are a royal pain- that's how you know when you have them \[such parents\]. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-schlessinger/decent-responsible-parents-are-a-royal-pain-that-s-how-you-know-when/) [Laura Schlessinger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-schlessinger/) > [It's sad that children cannot know their parents when they were younger; when they were loving, courting, and being nice to one another. By…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/virginia-satir/it-s-sad-that-children-cannot-know-their-parents-when-they-were/) [Virginia Satir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/virginia-satir/) > [The only reason I always try to meet and know the parents better is because it helps me to forgive their children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-johannot/the-only-reason-i-always-try-to-meet-and-know-the-parents-better-is/) Louis Johannot > [I don't know how our parents have dealt with us after all these years. We were pretty angsty teens.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alana-haim/i-don-t-know-how-our-parents-have-dealt-with-us-after-all-these-years/) [Alana Haim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alana-haim/) > [“To have the opportunity to know your parents is to have the opportunity to truly know yourself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-denise/to-have-the-opportunity-to-know-your-parents-is-to-have-the/) Amy Denise ## More by Frank Pittman > [In colonial America, the father was the primary parent. . . . Over the past two hundred years, each generation of fathers has hadless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/in-colonial-america-the-father-was-the-primary-parent-over-the-past/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [We long for our father. We wear his clothes, and actually try to fill his shoes. . . . We hang on to him,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/we-long-for-our-father-we-wear-his-clothes-and-actually-try-to-fill/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Our ability to fall in love requires enough comfort with our masculinity to join it with someone's femininity and feel enhanced. .. . If…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/our-ability-to-fall-in-love-requires-enough-comfort-with-our/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [The mother must teach her son how to respect and follow the rules. She must teach him how to compete successfully with the other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/the-mother-must-teach-her-son-how-to-respect-and-follow-the-rules-she/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Parents can fail to cheer your successes as wildly as you expected, pointing out that you are sharing your Nobel Prize with a couple…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/parents-can-fail-to-cheer-your-successes-as-wildly-as-you-expected/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Every boy was supposed to come into the world equipped with a father whose prime function was to be our father and show us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/every-boy-was-supposed-to-come-into-the-world-equipped-with-a-father/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [At the heart of male bonding is this experience of boys in early puberty: they know they must break free from their mothers and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/at-the-heart-of-male-bonding-is-this-experience-of-boys-in-early/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [We know how powerful our mother was when we were little, but is our wife that powerful to us now? Must we relive our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/we-know-how-powerful-our-mother-was-when-we-were-little-but-is-our/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Mothers who are strong people, who can pursue a life of their own when it is time to let their children go, empower their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/mothers-who-are-strong-people-who-can-pursue-a-life-of-their-own-when/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Fidelity is the single most important element in solidly enduring marriages.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/fidelity-is-the-single-most-important-element-in-solidly-enduring/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [To insult a friend implies that you respect his masculinity enough to know he can take it without acting like a crybaby. The swapping…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/to-insult-a-friend-implies-that-you-respect-his-masculinity-enough-to/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects the man.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/fathering-is-not-something-perfect-men-do-but-something-that-perfects/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Happy people learn that happiness, like sweat, is a by-product of activity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/happy-people-learn-that-happiness-like-sweat-is-a-by-product-of/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [In time, after a dozen years of centering their lives around the games boys play with one another, the boys' bodies change and that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/in-time-after-a-dozen-years-of-centering-their-lives-around-the-games/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) > [Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/marriage-like-a-submarine-is-only-safe-if-you-get-all-the-way-inside/) [Frank Pittman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) [Explore all 77 Frank Pittman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/) ## More Awful quotes > [It must be that I am dreaming, and that I shall awaken in a moment to see that awful knife descending toward my heart-…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-rice-burroughs/it-must-be-that-i-am-dreaming-and-that-i-shall-awaken-in-a-moment-to/) [Edgar Rice Burroughs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-rice-burroughs/) > [I spent two years in Palo Alto - what an awful, suffocating place for those of us who don't care about yoga, yogurts and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evgeny-morozov/i-spent-two-years-in-palo-alto-what-an-awful-suffocating-place-for/) [Evgeny Morozov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evgeny-morozov/) > [Layla brought her arms around herself, no doubt because she was remembering the feel of another, stronger set. "I have wanted to, but he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-r-ward/layla-brought-her-arms-around-herself-no-doubt-because-she-was/) [J.R. Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-r-ward/) > [You've seen the first issue and what happened in the last page. Some pretty awful stuff. I don't know why I seem to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/declan-shalvey/you-ve-seen-the-first-issue-and-what-happened-in-the-last-page-some/) [Declan Shalvey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/declan-shalvey/) > [It is not like studying German, where you mull along, in a groping, uncertain way, for thirty years; and at last, just as you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/it-is-not-like-studying-german-where-you-mull-along-in-a-groping/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [There was a special challenge in describing the awful childhood of a person who happens to be my own husband. It was very painful…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pamela-stephenson/there-was-a-special-challenge-in-describing-the-awful-childhood-of-a/) [Pamela Stephenson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pamela-stephenson/) > [On balance the moral influence of religion has been awful.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-weinberg/on-balance-the-moral-influence-of-religion-has-been-awful/) [Steven Weinberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-weinberg/) > [When you finish a poem, it clicks shut like the top of a jewel box, but prose is endless. I haven't experienced an awful…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kenneth-koch/when-you-finish-a-poem-it-clicks-shut-like-the-top-of-a-jewel-box-but/) [Kenneth Koch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kenneth-koch/) > [Fascism: awful stench of saw and axe.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michel-leiris/fascism-awful-stench-of-saw-and-axe/) [Michel Leiris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michel-leiris/) > [No one with a bad tie is getting my vote. Some Lib Dems wear the most shockingly awful ties.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/freddie-fox/no-one-with-a-bad-tie-is-getting-my-vote-some-lib-dems-wear-the-most/) [Freddie Fox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/freddie-fox/) > [“Here she was back in the brightly lit world she had been avoiding for twenty years, and it was exactly as awful as she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-charles-wilson/here-she-was-back-in-the-brightly-lit-world-she-had-been-avoiding-for/) [Robert Charles Wilson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-charles-wilson/) > [I'm pretty indiscriminating, and I have awful taste, generally.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nellie-mckay/i-m-pretty-indiscriminating-and-i-have-awful-taste-generally/) [Nellie McKay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nellie-mckay/) > [The blessed Religion revealed in the word of God will remain an eternal and awful monument to prove that the best Institution may be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-washington/the-blessed-religion-revealed-in-the-word-of-god-will-remain-an/) [George Washington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-washington/) > [“I am awful. I am heartless. I am scared that these things are actually true.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-am-awful-i-am-heartless-i-am-scared-that-these-things-are-actually/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Democracy is an awful way to run a country, but it's the best system we have.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/winston-churchill/democracy-is-an-awful-way-to-run-a-country-but-it-s-the-best-system/) [Winston Churchill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/winston-churchill/) Browse all 1,826 Awful quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The process of raising you didn't turn them into grown-ups. Parents who were clearly imperfect can be helpful to you. As you were trying to grow up despite their fumbling efforts, you had to develop skills and tolerances other kids missed out on. Some of the strongest people I know grew up taking care of inept, invalid, or psychotic parents--but they know the parents weren't normal, healthy, or whole.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Frank Pittman" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-are-awful-still-the-process-of/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Awful" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-are-awful-still-the-process-of/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/frank-pittman-8860_awful_some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-ar_473526.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Some parents were awful back then and are awful still. The process of raising you didn't turn them into…” — Frank Pittman", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Frank Pittman", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-pittman/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Some parents were awful back then...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-are-awful-still-the-process-of/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-pittman/some-parents-were-awful-back-then-and-are-awful-still-the-process-of/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```