--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We want to hear the story first and let…" description: "\"We want to hear the story first and let the meaning unfold, rather than to be present with expectations of a certain significance into which all behavi..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg" --- # We want to hear the story first and let the meaning… ![“We want to hear the story first and let the meaning unfold, rather than to be present with expectations of a certain significance into which all behavior is then fitted.” quote by Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg) > “We want to hear the story first and let the meaning unfold, rather than to be present with expectations of a certain significance into which all behavior is then fitted.” [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Listening to narratives before imposing meaning allows authentic understanding to emerge naturally. **In simple terms:** Hear stories before judging. Key Takeaway Seek context before conclusions. Themes listening authenticity interpretation Mood curious reflective Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - therapy sessions - storytelling workshops - personal counseling Key Concepts Gestalt therapy open‑ended inquiry Questions to Reflect On - How does pre‑conceptions limit insight? - When is immediate interpretation valuable? A Different Perspective May miss urgent insights if over‑cautious. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Behavior](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/behavior/) [Certain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/certain/) [Expectations](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/expectations/) [Expectations Certain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/expectations-certain-2617777/) [Firsts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/firsts/) [Habits](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/habits/) [Hear Story](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hear-story/) [Significance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/significance/) [Stories](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/stories/) [Story Let](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/story-let-240744/) [Unfold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unfold/) [Unfold Present](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unfold-present-2617778/) [Want](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/want/) ## Related quotes > [Love yourself even when you don't measure up to your own expectations. You have a certain idea of what you should do and what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-lenz/love-yourself-even-when-you-don-t-measure-up-to-your-own-expectations/) [Frederick Lenz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-lenz/) > [I prefer to bring these to the service of story rather than to let them replace narrative.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-gunn/i-prefer-to-bring-these-to-the-service-of-story-rather-than-to-let/) [James Gunn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-gunn/) > [I think it's more interesting to throw people into a story and let them catch up instead of explaining and feeling like you have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/grant-heslov/i-think-it-s-more-interesting-to-throw-people-into-a-story-and-let/) [Grant Heslov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/grant-heslov/) > [I'm an actor first and foremost. My producing credentials are just to say, 'Yeah, I love this story and now let's bring the people,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pierce-brosnan/i-m-an-actor-first-and-foremost-my-producing-credentials-are-just-to/) [Pierce Brosnan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pierce-brosnan/) > [I judge no one...everyone has a story but never let it become an excuse.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-judge-no-one-everyone-has-a-story-but-never-let-it-become-an-excuse/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“When writing, don't try to lead the story; let the story lead you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/giuseppe-bianco/when-writing-don-t-try-to-lead-the-story-let-the-story-lead-you/) [Giuseppe Bianco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/giuseppe-bianco/) > [“We're all in this story together; let's write it well.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-harvey/we-re-all-in-this-story-together-let-s-write-it-well/) [Steve Harvey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-harvey/) > [You're the hero of your own story. I had let go of my own story from my own childhood and whatever anger I had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/baron-vaughn/you-re-the-hero-of-your-own-story-i-had-let-go-of-my-own-story-from/) [Baron Vaughn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/baron-vaughn/) > [“Hope, this is our story. Let’s write it together.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/hope-this-is-our-story-let-s-write-it-together/) [Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/) > ['Cod' was a great story. It let me talk about the environment without putting people to sleep.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-kurlansky/cod-was-a-great-story-it-let-me-talk-about-the-environment-without/) [Mark Kurlansky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-kurlansky/) > [“Now that I've let go of my story, I can let go of my life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/traudl-junge/now-that-i-ve-let-go-of-my-story-i-can-let-go-of-my-life/) [Traudl Junge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/traudl-junge/) > [“Sometimes you only get one chance to rewrite the qualities of the character you played in a person's life story. Always take it. Never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-l-alder/sometimes-you-only-get-one-chance-to-rewrite-the-qualities-of-the/) [Shannon L. Alder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-l-alder/) > [“You alone own your story. Do not let another tell it, and if you find yourself in the company of one determined to rewrite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeanette-leblanc/you-alone-own-your-story-do-not-let-another-tell-it-and-if-you-find/) [Jeanette LeBlanc](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeanette-leblanc/) > [“History is not a dead thing or a sure thing. It lived with our choices and our dreams. It is the story of our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-nestle/history-is-not-a-dead-thing-or-a-sure-thing-it-lived-with-our-choices/) [Joan Nestle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-nestle/) > [Long fiction is wonderful and you can lose yourself in it as a reader and as a writer, but short stories don't allow the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/isobelle-carmody/long-fiction-is-wonderful-and-you-can-lose-yourself-in-it-as-a-reader/) [Isobelle Carmody](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/isobelle-carmody/) ## More by Erving Polster > [Therapy is too good to be limited to the sick.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/therapy-is-too-good-to-be-limited-to-the-sick/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) > [When a person has swum, traveled, run a lathe, planted flowers, ridden a motorcycle, made wine, painted a picture, parachuted, he has increased the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/when-a-person-has-swum-traveled-run-a-lathe-planted-flowers-ridden-a/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) > [A new question for the psychotherapist to ask is whether a theory can go beyond mere effectiveness in achieving either a so-called cure or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/a-new-question-for-the-psychotherapist-to-ask-is-whether-a-theory-can/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) > [Theory and knowledge remain suspect, not because of inherent worthlessness, but because of their historic isolation from action. Without theoretical orientation, however, action is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/theory-and-knowledge-remain-suspect-not-because-of-inherent/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) > [Fascination is a key to productivity; it unites experiences; it is even its own reward.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/fascination-is-a-key-to-productivity-it-unites-experiences-it-is-even/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) > [The paradox is that, while a concern with past and future is obviously central to psychological functioning, to behave as though one were indeed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/the-paradox-is-that-while-a-concern-with-past-and-future-is-obviously/) [Erving Polster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) [Explore all 7 Erving Polster quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/) ## More Behavior quotes > [The vision of the left, full of envy and resentment, takes its worst toll on those at the bottom - whether black or white…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-sowell/the-vision-of-the-left-full-of-envy-and-resentment-takes-its-worst/) [Thomas Sowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-sowell/) > [By making conscious choices in our behavior and where we focus our attention, we can transform our experience of our body, decrease our biological…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/by-making-conscious-choices-in-our-behavior-and-where-we-focus-our/) [Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/) > [As you begin changing your thinking, start immediately to change your behaviour. Begin to act the part of the person you would like to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/as-you-begin-changing-your-thinking-start-immediately-to-change-your/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“I now know that deep within the human concept is something dark, selfish, and completely willing to do whatever is necessary to support the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-west/i-now-know-that-deep-within-the-human-concept-is-something-dark/) [Melissa West](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-west/) > [“We are endowed with genes which code out our reaction to beavers and otters, maybe our reaction to each other as well. We are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-thomas/we-are-endowed-with-genes-which-code-out-our-reaction-to-beavers-and/) [Lewis Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-thomas/) > [The number of poor, and poorly prepared, students who succeed in college and beyond undercuts the simplistic notion that economic or educational disadvantage is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roland-merullo/the-number-of-poor-and-poorly-prepared-students-who-succeed-in/) [Roland Merullo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roland-merullo/) > [To behave creatively in art means behavior with skill; and skill comes from discipline, not derangement. The artist who knows the rules -and proportion…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/burne-hogarth/to-behave-creatively-in-art-means-behavior-with-skill-and-skill-comes/) [Burne Hogarth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/burne-hogarth/) > [You don't put milk in chamomile tea - that's disgusting behavior! That's not right.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-fraser/you-don-t-put-milk-in-chamomile-tea-that-s-disgusting-behavior-that-s/) [Laura Fraser](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-fraser/) > [The laws of thermodynamics, as empirically determined, express the approximate and probable behavior of systems of a great number of particles, or, more precisely,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-willard-gibbs/the-laws-of-thermodynamics-as-empirically-determined-express-the/) [J. Willard Gibbs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-willard-gibbs/) > [I started with the belief that every person who came to the laboratory was free to accept or to reject the dictates of authority.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stanley-milgram/i-started-with-the-belief-that-every-person-who-came-to-the/) [Stanley Milgram](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stanley-milgram/) > [The tipping point is that magic moment when an idea, trend, or social behavior crosses a threshold, tips, and spreads like wildfire.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/malcolm-gladwell/the-tipping-point-is-that-magic-moment-when-an-idea-trend-or-social/) [Malcolm Gladwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/malcolm-gladwell/) > [I think we've told a lot of lies about human behavior through film.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-arquette/i-think-we-ve-told-a-lot-of-lies-about-human-behavior-through-film/) [Patricia Arquette](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-arquette/) > [The strongest rebellion may be expressed in quiet, undramatic behavior.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/benjamin-spock/the-strongest-rebellion-may-be-expressed-in-quiet-undramatic-behavior/) [Benjamin Spock](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/benjamin-spock/) > [The behavior of any bureaucratic organization can best be understood by assuming that it is controlled by a secret cabal of its enemies.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-conquest/the-behavior-of-any-bureaucratic-organization-can-best-be-understood/) [Robert Conquest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-conquest/) > [If you want good behavior, don't pay on a commission basis. Our judges aren't paid so much a case. We keep them pretty well…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-munger/if-you-want-good-behavior-don-t-pay-on-a-commission-basis-our-judges/) [Charlie Munger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-munger/) [Browse all 4,218 Behavior quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/behavior/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We want to hear the story first and let the meaning unfold, rather than to be present with expectations of a certain significance into which all behavior is then fitted.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Erving Polster" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let-the-meaning-unfold-rather/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Behavior" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let-the-meaning-unfold-rather/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/erving-polster-51045_behavior_we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let_1875790.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We want to hear the story first and let the meaning unfold, rather than to be present with expectations of a…” — Erving Polster", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Erving Polster", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erving-polster/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "We want to hear the story...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let-the-meaning-unfold-rather/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erving-polster/we-want-to-hear-the-story-first-and-let-the-meaning-unfold-rather/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```