--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We also fought about everything -- like…" description: "\"“We also fought about everything -- like real sisters. We fought about money, bedrooms, whose car to take. Everyone of these fights was actually about ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6fb/erica-jong-445_fought_we-also-fought-about-everything-like-rea_2946204.jpg" --- # We also fought about everything -- like real sisters. We… ![“We also fought about everything -- like real sisters. We fought about money, bedrooms, whose car to take. Everyone of these fights was actually about something else -- usually abandonment. I wanted to be first on her list and she wanted to be first on mine. I wanted all her attention, all her…” quote by Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6fb/erica-jong-445_fought_we-also-fought-about-everything-like-rea_2946204.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6fb/erica-jong-445_fought_we-also-fought-about-everything-like-rea_2946204.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6fb/erica-jong-445_fought_we-also-fought-about-everything-like-rea_2946204.jpg) > ““We also fought about everything -- like real sisters. We fought about money, bedrooms, whose car to take. Everyone of these fights was actually about something else -- usually abandonment. I wanted to be first on her list and she wanted to be first on mine. I wanted all her attention, all her love, all her care. I wanted her to be my mommy, my daddy, my sister. She wanted the same from me. She wanted to be fed, cared for, nurtured without limit. She wanted backrubs, poems, pastas, and to be left alone when she needed to be left alone. She wanted to come before my writing, my child, my man. And I wanted no less from her. She was sick at first, so I took care of her. Then I was jealous of the attention and she took care of me. We had gone down into the primal cave of our friendship. we had felt loved enough to rage and fight, to show the inside of our naked throats and our bared fags, and the friendship took another leap toward intimacy. Without rage, intimacy can't be.”” [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The quote describes how deep friendships can involve intense conflict that actually reflects underlying needs for love, care, and fear of abandonment, and that such raw emotion is a prerequisite for true intimacy. **In simple terms:** Friendship fights hide deeper needs for love and belonging. Key Takeaway Embrace honest conflict to deepen intimacy. Themes friendship intimacy conflict emotional needs vulnerability Mood reflective intense hopeful Type personal relationship psychological When to use this quote - close friendships - caregiver relationships - creative collaborations - family dynamics - personal growth Key Concepts attachment theory psychology of relationships emotional honesty Questions to Reflect On - What hidden needs drive your arguments? - How can you turn rivalry into deeper connection? A Different Perspective If conflict is suppressed, intimacy may remain superficial. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Felt Loved](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/felt-loved/) [Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship/) [Intimacy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/intimacy/) [Money](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/money/) [Romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/romance/) ## Related quotes > [“how do i welcome in kindness when i have only practiced spreading my legs for the terrifying what am i to do with you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rupi-kaur/how-do-i-welcome-in-kindness-when-i-have-only-practiced-spreading-my/) [Rupi Kaur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rupi-kaur/) > [“If you were lucky enough to feel safe enough to fight and struggle, then you were lucky indeed. If you felt loved enough to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/if-you-were-lucky-enough-to-feel-safe-enough-to-fight-and-struggle/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [I always wanted to be a mommy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-seymour/i-always-wanted-to-be-a-mommy/) [Stephanie Seymour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-seymour/) > [When I started on the 'Burnett' show, I was just out of high school, and when we went off the air, I was 28…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vicki-lawrence/when-i-started-on-the-burnett-show-i-was-just-out-of-high-school-and/) [Vicki Lawrence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vicki-lawrence/) > [I've always wanted to be a mommy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-mixon/i-ve-always-wanted-to-be-a-mommy/) [Katy Mixon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katy-mixon/) > [“It wasn't okay. I didn't want her to leave. I didn't care if Jesus wanted her or not. She was my mommy. He could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamie-mcguire/it-wasn-t-okay-i-didn-t-want-her-to-leave-i-didn-t-care-if-jesus/) [Jamie McGuire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamie-mcguire/) > [“My brothers nodded their heads in unison. All of them but me. It wasn’t okay. I didn’t want her to leave. I didn’t care…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamie-mcguire/my-brothers-nodded-their-heads-in-unison-all-of-them-but-me-it-wasn-t/) [Jamie McGuire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamie-mcguire/) > [Part of their problem was Percy. He fought like a demon, whirling through the defender's ranks in a completely unorthodox style, rolling under their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-riordan/part-of-their-problem-was-percy-he-fought-like-a-demon-whirling/) [Rick Riordan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-riordan/) > [We fought like brothers, somethin we never should should do. We could've used time spent arguin tellin the truth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dr-dre-2/we-fought-like-brothers-somethin-we-never-should-should-do-we-could/) [Dr Dre](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dr-dre-2/) > [“The fights they had now were much worse. Isabella had never fought like this with anyone before. With Ben, she had all-out, drunken marathon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-close/the-fights-they-had-now-were-much-worse-isabella-had-never-fought/) [Jennifer Close](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-close/) > [“They fought like champions. For a minute. Just when it was getting interesting, both boys were hauled away their collars. A watchful parent.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/markus-zusak/they-fought-like-champions-for-a-minute-just-when-it-was-getting/) [Markus Zusak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/markus-zusak/) > [Even though we constantly fought like soldiers. Together we 'sposed to fall down like boulders.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william/even-though-we-constantly-fought-like-soldiers-together-we-sposed-to/) [WillIAm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william/) > [“Even love couldn’t cushion a fall like ours. My love for Tristan was so big that I felt consumed by it, and even so,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-k-lilley/even-love-couldn-t-cushion-a-fall-like-ours-my-love-for-tristan-was/) [R.K. Lilley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-k-lilley/) > [We fought like heck for every player and every advantage, but we knew we were part of something bigger than ourselves. To me, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pat-gillick/we-fought-like-heck-for-every-player-and-every-advantage-but-we-knew/) [Pat Gillick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pat-gillick/) > [“Left with nothing but my own bloody fingertips, I let out a war cry of my own, raked my nails over its face, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-lynn-barnes/left-with-nothing-but-my-own-bloody-fingertips-i-let-out-a-war-cry-of/) [Jennifer Lynn Barnes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-lynn-barnes/) ## More by Erica Jong > [“It took me years to learn to sit at my desk for more than two minutes at a time, to put up with the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/it-took-me-years-to-learn-to-sit-at-my-desk-for-more-than-two-minutes/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Will you ever? I dont think you will ever fully understand how you've touched my life and made me who I am.I don't think…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/will-you-ever-i-dont-think-you-will-ever-fully-understand-how-you-ve/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Give advice to your children while they're young enough to believe you know what you're talking about.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/give-advice-to-your-children-while-they-re-young-enough-to-believe/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Perhaps all artists were, in a sense, housewives: tenders of the earth household.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/perhaps-all-artists-were-in-a-sense-housewives-tenders-of-the-earth/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [I have lived my life according to this principle: If I'm afraid of it, then I must do it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/i-have-lived-my-life-according-to-this-principle-if-i-m-afraid-of-it/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [I thought to spend my declining years writing poetry and teaching - but that won't pay the Bergdorf's bill. I think I'll move to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/i-thought-to-spend-my-declining-years-writing-poetry-and-teaching-but/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [“Naomi Wolf dares to explode the myth of 'victim feminism' and pleads for allowing women to be as full of good and bad desires…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/naomi-wolf-dares-to-explode-the-myth-of-victim-feminism-and-pleads/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [I knew I was in England by the smell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/i-knew-i-was-in-england-by-the-smell/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [The Lives of Great Men are more oft' at variance with their profess'd Phillosophies than consistent with 'em.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/the-lives-of-great-men-are-more-oft-at-variance-with-their-profess-d/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Women's books are kind of discriminated against. If a man writes a book about his family stories, people think of it as literature. If…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/women-s-books-are-kind-of-discriminated-against-if-a-man-writes-a/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Many, many people have done a lot more sexual experimentation than I have.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/many-many-people-have-done-a-lot-more-sexual-experimentation-than-i/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [“Is life much too long for an immortal?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/is-life-much-too-long-for-an-immortal/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Don't ye know that ev'ry Soul on Earth feels itself to be an Orphan?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/don-t-ye-know-that-ev-ry-soul-on-earth-feels-itself-to-be-an-orphan/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Critics write out of intellectual exercise, not poets. Poets write straight from the heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/critics-write-out-of-intellectual-exercise-not-poets-poets-write/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) > [Once I worshipped Keats for dying young. Now I think it's braver to die old.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jong/once-i-worshipped-keats-for-dying-young-now-i-think-it-s-braver-to/) [Erica Jong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) [Explore all 542 Erica Jong quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-jong/) ## More Fought quotes > [I thought I fought a really good Orlando Salido. I never let him get into his fight. I knew what I needed to do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mikey-garcia/i-thought-i-fought-a-really-good-orlando-salido-i-never-let-him-get/) [Mikey Garcia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mikey-garcia/) > [I've fought a lot of good girls and I think Valentina is one level above any other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jessica-andrade/i-ve-fought-a-lot-of-good-girls-and-i-think-valentina-is-one-level/) [Jessica Andrade](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jessica-andrade/) > [“I hurt too. For six years I fought every day not to think of you, and I lost, because every day you were all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-mccarthy/i-hurt-too-for-six-years-i-fought-every-day-not-to-think-of-you-and-i/) [Kate McCarthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-mccarthy/) > [I fought when there was no money from fighting really.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/josh-barnett/i-fought-when-there-was-no-money-from-fighting-really/) [Josh Barnett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/josh-barnett/) > [The battle for our hearts is fought on the pages of our calendar.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-goff/the-battle-for-our-hearts-is-fought-on-the-pages-of-our-calendar/) [Bob Goff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-goff/) > [How did you escape? (Syd) I fought my way out in a manner that would have made Rambo proud. And when I got home…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherrilyn-kenyon/how-did-you-escape-syd-i-fought-my-way-out-in-a-manner-that-would/) [Sherrilyn Kenyon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherrilyn-kenyon/) > [“You fought the fight over and over, and you never won the milkshake.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/you-fought-the-fight-over-and-over-and-you-never-won-the-milkshake/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [I fought Miguel Cotto in Madison Square Garden on the eve of the Puerto Rican Day parade - it was like fighting the devil…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulie-malignaggi/i-fought-miguel-cotto-in-madison-square-garden-on-the-eve-of-the/) [Paulie Malignaggi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulie-malignaggi/) > [I've already fought my share. God gave me a rich, eventful career, and I thank God for everything, but I'm done fighting.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fedor-emelianenko/i-ve-already-fought-my-share-god-gave-me-a-rich-eventful-career-and-i/) [Fedor Emelianenko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fedor-emelianenko/) > [It is interesting that Nehru fought and kept saying that if you break India into languages, there is no end to it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shekhar-kapur/it-is-interesting-that-nehru-fought-and-kept-saying-that-if-you-break/) [Shekhar Kapur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shekhar-kapur/) > [I would have loved to have fought 15-rounders, because I always come on strong at the end.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-froch/i-would-have-loved-to-have-fought-15-rounders-because-i-always-come/) [Carl Froch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-froch/) > [I could have fought in any era and a lot of the old warriors feel I'm like an old-school fighter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-toney/i-could-have-fought-in-any-era-and-a-lot-of-the-old-warriors-feel-i-m/) [James Toney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-toney/) > [“Wars are never won, they’re only fought.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-hildreth/wars-are-never-won-they-re-only-fought/) [Scott Hildreth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-hildreth/) > [“There are some who said I should have fought harder or longer than I did for my marriage, but in the end fighting for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paula-mclain/there-are-some-who-said-i-should-have-fought-harder-or-longer-than-i/) [Paula McLain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paula-mclain/) > [“Always fight until you can't anymore, and then be fought for...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerose/always-fight-until-you-can-t-anymore-and-then-be-fought-for/) [Jerose](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerose/) Browse all 831 Fought quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“We also fought about everything -- like real sisters. 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