--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I used to take hostages in my…" description: "\"I used to take hostages in my relationships and not let people be independent. It always ended in disaster, because you take away people's identity and..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80c/elton-john-849_disaster_i-used-to-take-hostages-in-my-relationsh_1128347.png" --- # I used to take hostages in my relationships and not let… ![“I used to take hostages in my relationships and not let people be independent. It always ended in disaster, because you take away people's identity and they end up full of resentment.” quote by Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80c/elton-john-849_disaster_i-used-to-take-hostages-in-my-relationsh_1128347.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80c/elton-john-849_disaster_i-used-to-take-hostages-in-my-relationsh_1128347.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80c/elton-john-849_disaster_i-used-to-take-hostages-in-my-relationsh_1128347.png) > “I used to take hostages in my relationships and not let people be independent. It always ended in disaster, because you take away people's identity and they end up full of resentment.” [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Describes controlling behavior in relationships that destroys independence and breeds resentment **In simple terms:** Control harms relationships and creates resentment Key Takeaway Release control to foster healthy connections Themes relationships control independence Mood reflective empathetic Type advice insightful When to use this quote - Personal growth - relationship counseling - team leadership Key Concepts Attachment theory emotional intelligence power dynamics Questions to Reflect On - What freedoms do you unintentionally limit? - How can you encourage autonomy in others? A Different Perspective May be difficult to change entrenched habits ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Disaster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/disaster/) [End Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/end-resentment-3087588/) [Ends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ends/) [Hostage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hostage/) [Hostages Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hostages-relationships-3087587/) [Identity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/identity/) [Independent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/independent/) [Independent Ended](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/independent-ended-3087589/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [People Independent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people-independent-1475944/) [Relationships Let](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationships-let-2086166/) [Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment/) [Used](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/used/) ## Related quotes > [“We have to teach our children how to love, how to bond, how to deal with their emotions, how to have healthy relationships, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-eanes/we-have-to-teach-our-children-how-to-love-how-to-bond-how-to-deal/) [Rebecca Eanes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-eanes/) > [When you let God be God you can let humans be humans. 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I have to give it my all every time I go onstage.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/for-me-music-is-so-passionate-i-have-to-give-it-my-all-every-time-i/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [No tears to damn you when jealousy burns.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/no-tears-to-damn-you-when-jealousy-burns/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [And we have come so far like that. I mean, the advances on the medication side have been enormous, and the advances on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/and-we-have-come-so-far-like-that-i-mean-the-advances-on-the/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids, in fact it's cold as hell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/mars-ain-t-the-kind-of-place-to-raise-your-kids-in-fact-it-s-cold-as/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [I love the idea of the teachings of Jesus Christ and the beautiful stories about it, which I loved in Sunday school and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/i-love-the-idea-of-the-teachings-of-jesus-christ-and-the-beautiful/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [I'm not bored with my life. 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Oh, don't believe that woman please.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/you-can-beat-her-but-don-t-mistreat-her-oh-don-t-believe-that-woman/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [The Backstreet Boys can sing their asses off. I'm not so sure about those other boy bands. But Backstreet Boys have my ultimate respect.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/the-backstreet-boys-can-sing-their-asses-off-i-m-not-so-sure-about/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [I grew up at my grandmother's house, and she had a beautiful garden. I used to hate mowing the lawn and weeding, which is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/i-grew-up-at-my-grandmother-s-house-and-she-had-a-beautiful-garden-i/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [ He \[Ryan White\] had a kind of angelic aura about him. And his family, too, it's like, they are going through all this suffering,… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/he-ryan-white-had-a-kind-of-angelic-aura-about-him-and-his-family-too/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [Welcome to the world of bullshit, my dear. You have arrived.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/welcome-to-the-world-of-bullshit-my-dear-you-have-arrived/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) [Explore all 352 Elton John quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) ## More Disaster quotes > [Public infrastructure around the world is facing unprecedented stress, with hurricanes, cyclones, floods and forest fires all increasing in frequency and intensity. 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In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster; an unexpected affliction that strikes hard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ambrose-bierce/whangdepootenawah-n-in-the-ojibwa-tongue-disaster-an-unexpected/) [Ambrose Bierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ambrose-bierce/) > [Architects mostly work for privileged people, people who have money and power, Power and money are invisible, so people hire us to visualize their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shigeru-ban/architects-mostly-work-for-privileged-people-people-who-have-money/) [Shigeru Ban](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shigeru-ban/) > [The only aspect of our travels that is interesting to others is disaster.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martha-gellmanmartha-gellman/the-only-aspect-of-our-travels-that-is-interesting-to-others-is/) [Martha GellmanMartha Gellman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martha-gellmanmartha-gellman/) [Browse all 2,239 Disaster quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/disaster/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I used to take hostages in my relationships and not let people be independent. 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