--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I had always been in love with someone…" description: "\"“I had always been in love with someone. It was the only thing that made it feasible to live that way, getting up at six and remaining conscious until ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg" --- # I had always been in love with someone. It was the only… ![“I had always been in love with someone. It was the only thing that made it feasible to live that way, getting up at six and remaining conscious until late at night. It was like religion for medieval people. It gave you energy to face injustice, powerlessness, and drudgery. The guys I was in love…” quote by Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg) > ““I had always been in love with someone. It was the only thing that made it feasible to live that way, getting up at six and remaining conscious until late at night. It was like religion for medieval people. It gave you energy to face injustice, powerlessness, and drudgery. The guys I was in love with always ignored me, but were never unkind. There was something abstract and gentle about the feeling of being ignored, a feeling of being spared, an impossibility of anything happening, which was consonant with my understanding of love. In theory, of course, I knew love could be reciprocated. It was something that happened, often, to other people. But I was unlike other people in so many ways.”” [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator finds a solitary, almost religious devotion to an unreciprocated love that sustains her through daily hardships, despite its one‑sided nature. **In simple terms:** A one‑sided love gives purpose and comfort despite being ignored. Key Takeaway Embrace the comfort of solitary devotion while seeking reciprocal connection. Themes loneliness unrequited love resilience spirituality Mood melancholic reflective hopeful Type literary personal philosophical When to use this quote - daily routine - personal hardship - creative work - social isolation Key Concepts existentialism psychology literary narrative Questions to Reflect On - How does unreciprocated love shape your sense of self? - Can solitary devotion become a barrier to real connection? A Different Perspective The love may prevent growth in mutual relationships and self‑esteem. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Coping](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/coping/) [Growing up](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/growing-up/) [High school](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/high-school/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Religion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/religion/) [Romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/romance/) [Understanding love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understanding-love/) [Understanding Of Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understanding-of-love/) ## Related quotes > [“Our understanding of love has been hijacked and beguiled by its first distractingly moving moments. We have allowed our love stories to end way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alain-de-botton/our-understanding-of-love-has-been-hijacked-and-beguiled-by-its-first/) [Alain de Botton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alain-de-botton/) > [“When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kahlil-gibran/when-love-beckons-to-you-follow-him-though-his-ways-are-hard-and-3/) [Kahlil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kahlil-gibran/) > [“God is love, but this is quite different from affirming that our culture’s understanding of love must be God.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-deyoung/god-is-love-but-this-is-quite-different-from-affirming-that-our/) [Kevin DeYoung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-deyoung/) > [What we typically call love is only the start of love. Our understanding of love has been hijacked and beguiled by its first distractingly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alain-de-botton/what-we-typically-call-love-is-only-the-start-of-love-our/) [Alain de Botton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alain-de-botton/) > [“But the way we exercise authority and define our marital roles often doesn’t seem informed by a biblical understanding of love at all. Some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/winston-t-smith/but-the-way-we-exercise-authority-and-define-our-marital-roles-often/) [Winston T. Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/winston-t-smith/) > [You can do marvels and miracles if you have developed the understanding of love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nirmala-srivastava/you-can-do-marvels-and-miracles-if-you-have-developed-the/) [Nirmala Srivastava](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nirmala-srivastava/) > [“When love beckons to you, follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kahlil-gibran/when-love-beckons-to-you-follow-him-though-his-ways-are-hard-and-2/) [Kahlil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kahlil-gibran/) > [“When love beckons to you, follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And When his wings enfold you yield to him, Though…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kahlil-gibran/when-love-beckons-to-you-follow-him-though-his-ways-are-hard-and/) [Kahlil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kahlil-gibran/) > [“Musicians have always had a better understanding of love than the rest of us. Over the years they have told us that love: is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cuthbert-soup/musicians-have-always-had-a-better-understanding-of-love-than-the/) [Cuthbert Soup](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cuthbert-soup/) > [“There can be great depths of love that are not reciprocated.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-h-eg/there-can-be-great-depths-of-love-that-are-not-reciprocated/) [Peter Høeg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-h-eg/) > [Evidence of trust begets trust, and love is reciprocated by love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/plutarch/evidence-of-trust-begets-trust-and-love-is-reciprocated-by-love/) [Plutarch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/plutarch/) > [At times it so happens, when we know we cant live without someone very special to us, and also know that, our love for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/santanu-mishra/at-times-it-so-happens-when-we-know-we-cant-live-without-someone-very/) [Santanu Mishra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/santanu-mishra/) > [If you think you love me, then you don’t know what love is,' Gabriel said. 'Love has to be reciprocated for it to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexandra-adornetto/if-you-think-you-love-me-then-you-don-t-know-what-love-is-gabriel/) [Alexandra Adornetto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexandra-adornetto/) > [“Its such a nice feeling to be in love, but its such a blessing for love reciprocated..to love and be loved back..”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cindy-maria/its-such-a-nice-feeling-to-be-in-love-but-its-such-a-blessing-for/) Cindy Maria > [Love has to be reciprocated for it to be real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexandra-adornetto/love-has-to-be-reciprocated-for-it-to-be-real/) [Alexandra Adornetto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexandra-adornetto/) ## More by Elif Batuman > [My parents were born into a secular country. They met in Turkey's top medical school, moved to America in the nineteen-seventies, and became researchers…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/my-parents-were-born-into-a-secular-country-they-met-in-turkey-s-top/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“I leafed through the phrase book. If a Martian read it, the Martian would probably decide to avoid Hungary.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-leafed-through-the-phrase-book-if-a-martian-read-it-the-martian/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [You can't invent something you have no epistemological access to. In a way, it's all recombination.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/you-can-t-invent-something-you-have-no-epistemological-access-to-in-a/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [Poetry is another space, like love, where we extend that extra credit to the writer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/poetry-is-another-space-like-love-where-we-extend-that-extra-credit/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“Svetlana said that she identified with that Madonna more than with any other woman in any other painting. She kept asking me what painting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/svetlana-said-that-she-identified-with-that-madonna-more-than-with/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [One of the most painful parts of a breakup is having the feeling that your life is a story, and then the other person…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/one-of-the-most-painful-parts-of-a-breakup-is-having-the-feeling-that/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“Dracula visited the Wolf Department at the Zoological Gardens. "These wolves seem upset at something," he observed. The next morning the cage was all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/dracula-visited-the-wolf-department-at-the-zoological-gardens-these/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [I like to think that I know a lot of words, but I definitely don't know all of them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-like-to-think-that-i-know-a-lot-of-words-but-i-definitely-don-t/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“I don't know if I ended up siding with the academics just because I happened to end up in graduate school, or if I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-don-t-know-if-i-ended-up-siding-with-the-academics-just-because-i/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [People don't become writers because they love having spontaneous, real-world interactions with living people as bodies with clothes in time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/people-don-t-become-writers-because-they-love-having-spontaneous-real/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“Each work of criticism is supposed to build on the body of work, to increase the total sum of human understanding. It's not like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/each-work-of-criticism-is-supposed-to-build-on-the-body-of-work-to/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [Humor is really important to me. All my favorite writers are writers I consider to be funny, including Tolstoy and Dostoevsky, even though that's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/humor-is-really-important-to-me-all-my-favorite-writers-are-writers-i/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [Every time a meteor comes close to the earth, we all think about the end of the world - but our internal soundtrack doesn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/every-time-a-meteor-comes-close-to-the-earth-we-all-think-about-the/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [I felt grateful to Ataturk that my parents were so well educated, that they weren't held back by superstition or religion, that they were…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-felt-grateful-to-ataturk-that-my-parents-were-so-well-educated-that/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) > [“For a moment it felt like we weren’t in the Danube at all but in the river of time, and everyone was at a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/for-a-moment-it-felt-like-we-weren-t-in-the-danube-at-all-but-in-the/) [Elif Batuman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) [Explore all 182 Elif Batuman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/) ## More Coping quotes > [Imperfections are what make you perfect.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nia-tell/imperfections-are-what-make-you-perfect/) [Nia Tellé](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nia-tell/) > [I think for the rest of the day I'll turn to my comfort/coping mechanisms...red wine and online shopping.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-think-for-the-rest-of-the-day-i-ll-turn-to-my-comfort-coping/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The body is thus not simply an 'entity', but is experienced as a practical mode of coping with external situations and events.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-giddens/the-body-is-thus-not-simply-an-entity-but-is-experienced-as-a/) [Anthony Giddens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-giddens/) > ['Johnny' was a coping mechanism who could take those things which could have ordinarily destroyed me, by tweaking my past and throwing it back…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johnny-vegas/johnny-was-a-coping-mechanism-who-could-take-those-things-which-could/) [Johnny Vegas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johnny-vegas/) > [In terms of humor, it's a really powerful coping mechanism, and it gets you through really dark days.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eva-victor/in-terms-of-humor-it-s-a-really-powerful-coping-mechanism-and-it-gets/) [Eva Victor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eva-victor/) > [Occasionally some individuals let the seeming ordinariness of life dampen their spirits. Though actually coping and growning, others lack the quiet, inner-soul satisfaction that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neal-a-maxwell/occasionally-some-individuals-let-the-seeming-ordinariness-of-life/) [Neal A. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neal-a-maxwell/) > [Punishment by definition isn't going to help. So what you need to do is to help people to change and recover is to help…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maia-szalavitz/punishment-by-definition-isn-t-going-to-help-so-what-you-need-to-do/) [Maia Szalavitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maia-szalavitz/) > [Remaining calm in adversity is a sign of great spiritual strength. No matter what's going on in your life right now, Hold your peace!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kemmy-nola/remaining-calm-in-adversity-is-a-sign-of-great-spiritual-strength-no/) [Kemmy Nola](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kemmy-nola/) > [If something is bothering you right now, try not to make any decision in hurry instead take some time to think.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anurag-prakash-ray/if-something-is-bothering-you-right-now-try-not-to-make-any-decision/) [Anurag Prakash Ray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anurag-prakash-ray/) > [No one would feel embarrassed about seeking help for a child if they broke their arm and we really should be equally ready to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-middleton/no-one-would-feel-embarrassed-about-seeking-help-for-a-child-if-they/) [Kate Middleton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-middleton/) > [“When I can’t fight, I need you to fight harder. When I can’t be strong anymore, I need you to be stronger." - Neela…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-seril/when-i-can-t-fight-i-need-you-to-fight-harder-when-i-can-t-be-strong/) Steven Seril > [“For every evil under the sun, There is a remedy, or there is none. If there be one, try and find it; If there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mother-goose-rhymes/for-every-evil-under-the-sun-there-is-a-remedy-or-there-is-none-if/) Mother Goose Rhymes > [This is my life now. Absurd, but unpredictable. Not absurd because unpredictable but unpredictable because absurd. If I have lost the meaning of my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joyce-carol-oates/this-is-my-life-now-absurd-but-unpredictable-not-absurd-because/) [Joyce Carol Oates](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joyce-carol-oates/) > [Some say time heals the broken, but I say it gives answers for the unanswered questions and thoughts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/some-say-time-heals-the-broken-but-i-say-it-gives-answers-for-the/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“To get through the night, I sometimes imagined the sky filled with a canopy of stars. I imagined that each star contained the soul…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-bialosky/to-get-through-the-night-i-sometimes-imagined-the-sky-filled-with-a/) [Jill Bialosky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-bialosky/) [Browse all 462 Coping quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/coping/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I had always been in love with someone. It was the only thing that made it feasible to live that way, getting up at six and remaining conscious until late at night. It was like religion for medieval people. It gave you energy to face injustice, powerlessness, and drudgery. The guys I was in love with always ignored me, but were never unkind. There was something abstract and gentle about the feeling of being ignored, a feeling of being spared, an impossibility of anything happening, which was consonant with my understanding of love. In theory, of course, I knew love could be reciprocated. It was something that happened, often, to other people. But I was unlike other people in so many ways.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Elif Batuman" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-it-was-the-only-thing-that/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Coping" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-it-was-the-only-thing-that/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c55/elif-batuman-2172_coping_i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-i_2859163.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I had always been in love with someone. It was the only thing that made it feasible to live that way…” — Elif Batuman", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Elif Batuman", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elif-batuman/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“I had always been in love...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-it-was-the-only-thing-that/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elif-batuman/i-had-always-been-in-love-with-someone-it-was-the-only-thing-that/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```