--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I am reminded that no matter how hard you…" description: "\"I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can never be more than twelve years old with your parents. Parents earnestly try not to inflame, but..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg" --- # I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can… ![“I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can never be more than twelve years old with your parents. Parents earnestly try not to inflame, but their comments contain no scale and a strange focus. Discussing your private life with parents is like misguidedly looking at a zit in a car's…” quote by Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg) > “I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can never be more than twelve years old with your parents. Parents earnestly try not to inflame, but their comments contain no scale and a strange focus. Discussing your private life with parents is like misguidedly looking at a zit in a car's rearview mirror and being convinced, in the absence of contrast or context, that you have developed combined heat rash and skin cancer.” [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. He reflects on parental advice being limited, likening it to misreading a minor skin issue. **In simple terms:** Parental advice can be limited and misdirected. Key Takeaway Seek independent perspective beyond parental input. Themes family advice misinterpretation Mood critical reflective Type philosophical personal When to use this quote - decision making - personal development - mental health Key Concepts generational gap communication breakdown Questions to Reflect On - When should you trust your own judgment? - How to balance respect and autonomy? A Different Perspective Overreliance on parents may hinder growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Absence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/absence/) [Cancer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cancer/) [Car](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/car/) [Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child/) [Comment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/comment/) [Contrast](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/contrast/) [Convinced](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/convinced/) [Discussing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discussing/) [Discussing Private](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discussing-private-2246922/) [Focus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/focus/) [Hard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hard/) [Heat](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/heat/) [Matter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/matter/) [Mirrors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mirrors/) [Parent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parent/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents/) [Parents Earnestly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents-earnestly-3924786/) [Parents Like](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents-like/) [Parents Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents-parents/) [Private life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/private-life/) [Rearview mirror](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rearview-mirror/) [Scales](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/scales/) [Skin cancer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/skin-cancer/) [Skins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/skins/) [Strange](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/strange/) [Trying](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trying/) [Twelve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/twelve/) [Years](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/years/) [Zits](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/zits/) ## Related quotes > [I have no intention of discussing my private life with anyone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-bloom/i-have-no-intention-of-discussing-my-private-life-with-anyone/) [Claire Bloom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claire-bloom/) > [So I was ugly. I was never fat, really, and I never wore headgear or had zits or anything. But I was ugly. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/so-i-was-ugly-i-was-never-fat-really-and-i-never-wore-headgear-or-had/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [My biggest beauty tip would be exfoliation, exfoliation, exfoliation! After a lifetime of almost no breakouts, I started having some pretty embarrassing ones and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amanda-crew/my-biggest-beauty-tip-would-be-exfoliation-exfoliation-exfoliation-2/) [Amanda Crew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amanda-crew/) > [Normally if I met a guy who was unemployed and illiterate who hadn't bathed in a couple of weeks, I'd be standing in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/normally-if-i-met-a-guy-who-was-unemployed-and-illiterate-who-hadn-t/) [Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/) > [I remember once acting really cool on a bus with this girl named Stephanie. When I got home, I realized that I had a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-cusack/i-remember-once-acting-really-cool-on-a-bus-with-this-girl-named-2/) [John Cusack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-cusack/) > [Zits are beauty marks.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-cobain/zits-are-beauty-marks/) [Kurt Cobain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-cobain/) > [I don't mean to change the subject or anything, but have you tried concealer on that zit?" Cynthia Lotte - Hot Six](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-evanovich/i-don-t-mean-to-change-the-subject-or-anything-but-have-you-tried/) [Janet Evanovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-evanovich/) > [I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s. I wouldn’t trade the small thin-lipped mouth that makes me resemble my nephew.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tina-fey/i-would-not-trade-any-of-these-features-for-anybody-else-s-i-wouldn-t/) [Tina Fey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tina-fey/) > [Being a teenager is the worst thirty years of your life. But it all changes after that. You get a great car, a great…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-titus/being-a-teenager-is-the-worst-thirty-years-of-your-life-but-it-all/) [Christopher Titus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-titus/) > [My biggest beauty tip would be exfoliation, exfoliation, exfoliation! After a lifetime of almost no breakouts, I learned that if you don't exfoliate, your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amanda-crew/my-biggest-beauty-tip-would-be-exfoliation-exfoliation-exfoliation/) [Amanda Crew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amanda-crew/) > [I try to stay away from McDonald's I find it gives me more zits then anyone else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kings-of-leon/i-try-to-stay-away-from-mcdonald-s-i-find-it-gives-me-more-zits-then/) [Kings Of Leon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kings-of-leon/) > [ \[People say\]'You're always happy' and I'm, like, sometimes I have a huge zit on my face. But if you smile, people won't notice that.… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cheyenne-kimball/people-say-you-re-always-happy-and-i-m-like-sometimes-i-have-a-huge/) [Cheyenne Kimball](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cheyenne-kimball/) > [We are so hard on ourselves and you shouldn't be... We all have zits. We all have bad days.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/taylor-hill/we-are-so-hard-on-ourselves-and-you-shouldn-t-be-we-all-have-zits-we/) [Taylor Hill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/taylor-hill/) > [It's difficult to have everybody like everything you do. I don't know anybody that's perfect and doesn't have a zit somewhere.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gordon-bethune/it-s-difficult-to-have-everybody-like-everything-you-do-i-don-t-know/) [Gordon Bethune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gordon-bethune/) > [As far as girly-ness goes, I never wear makeup, if I've got zits on my face I just let them go. So I've always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trisha-paytas/as-far-as-girly-ness-goes-i-never-wear-makeup-if-i-ve-got-zits-on-my/) [Trisha Paytas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trisha-paytas/) ## More by Douglas Coupland > [And in your new lives you'll have to live entirely for that one sensation-that of imminent truth. And you're going to have to holler…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-in-your-new-lives-you-ll-have-to-live-entirely-for-that-one/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [A man in a bookstore buys a book on loneliness and every woman in the store hits on him. A woman buys a book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/a-man-in-a-bookstore-buys-a-book-on-loneliness-and-every-woman-in-the/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [The future and eternity are two entirely different things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/the-future-and-eternity-are-two-entirely-different-things/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Do you remember how you felt at seventeen? I do and I don't (...) Imagine you came from outer space and someone showed you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/do-you-remember-how-you-felt-at-seventeen-i-do-and-i-don-t-imagine/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [You can't fake competence, creativity, or sexual arousal.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/you-can-t-fake-competence-creativity-or-sexual-arousal/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“But Dag, for all of his efforts, might as well have been talking to a cat. Our parents’ generation seems neither able nor interested…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/but-dag-for-all-of-his-efforts-might-as-well-have-been-talking-to-a/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Negative? Moi? I think realistic might be a better word. You mean to tell me we can drive all the way here from L.A.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/negative-moi-i-think-realistic-might-be-a-better-word-you-mean-to/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [It was pivotal in making you but you don't remember it. Or do you? Do we understand the events that make us who we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/it-was-pivotal-in-making-you-but-you-don-t-remember-it-or-do-you-do/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Your ability to rationalize your own bad deeds makes you believe that the whole world is as amoral as you are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/your-ability-to-rationalize-your-own-bad-deeds-makes-you-believe-that/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“I like to go beach-combing, and I like to find interestingly shaped rocks. When I really get into the groove I start finding beautiful…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-like-to-go-beach-combing-and-i-like-to-find-interestingly-shaped/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“You know, Dag and Claire smile a lot, as do many people I know. But I always wondered if there is something either mechanical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/you-know-dag-and-claire-smile-a-lot-as-do-many-people-i-know-but-i/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/brain-research-tells-us-that-only-twenty-percent-of-human-beings-have/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [I keep vampire hours, going to bed at 2 A.M. and waking up at about 10:30-11 A.M.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-keep-vampire-hours-going-to-bed-at-2-a-m-and-waking-up-at-about-10/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“Anna-Louise leans over and whispers in my ear. "This is so surreal," she says, "I think I'm turning into a melting clock.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/anna-louise-leans-over-and-whispers-in-my-ear-this-is-so-surreal-she/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [When you grow up these days, you're told you're going to have four or five different careers during your lifetime. But what they don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/when-you-grow-up-these-days-you-re-told-you-re-going-to-have-four-or/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) [Explore all 704 Douglas Coupland quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) ## More Absence quotes > [Distance sometimes endears friendship, and absence sweeteneth it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-howell/distance-sometimes-endears-friendship-and-absence-sweeteneth-it/) [James Howell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-howell/) > [The work, the work, the work. This is what the business is all about. This is the fun, the glory, the pleasure. It's the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phil-dusenberry/the-work-the-work-the-work-this-is-what-the-business-is-all-about/) [Phil Dusenberry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phil-dusenberry/) > [Total depravity means the entire absence of holiness, not the highest intensity of sin. A totally depraved man is not as bad as he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-greenough-thayer-shedd/total-depravity-means-the-entire-absence-of-holiness-not-the-highest/) [William Greenough Thayer Shedd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-greenough-thayer-shedd/) > [Local and state governments have outrun the federal government. The EPA has served notice that it will enact a rule requiring CO2 reductions by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/al-gore/local-and-state-governments-have-outrun-the-federal-government-the/) [Al Gore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/al-gore/) > [There, in the center of that silence was not eternity but the death of time and a loneliness so profound the word itself had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/toni-morrison/there-in-the-center-of-that-silence-was-not-eternity-but-the-death-of/) [Toni Morrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/toni-morrison/) > [Of all the bewildering things about a new country, the absence of human landmarks is one of the most depressing and disheartening.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/willa-cather/of-all-the-bewildering-things-about-a-new-country-the-absence-of/) [Willa Cather](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/willa-cather/) > [Young men have strong passions and tend to gratify them indiscriminately. Of the bodily desires, it is the sexual by which they are most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aristotle/young-men-have-strong-passions-and-tend-to-gratify-them/) [Aristotle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aristotle/) > [It is suggested that in domestic violence at least the presence or absence of a firearm, or of any other type of weapon, is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-greenwood/it-is-suggested-that-in-domestic-violence-at-least-the-presence-or/) [Colin Greenwood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-greenwood/) > [The absence of God in most spheres of life is perceived to be normal, and even Christians feel it as normal - which is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-piper/the-absence-of-god-in-most-spheres-of-life-is-perceived-to-be-normal/) [John Piper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-piper/) > [Every person needs to take one day away. A day in which one consciously separates the past from the future. Jobs, family, employers, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/every-person-needs-to-take-one-day-away-a-day-in-which-one/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [“I was thinking how most people don't make you feel much of anything at all. Don't make you feel like time spent with them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-lotter/i-was-thinking-how-most-people-don-t-make-you-feel-much-of-anything/) [Jane Lotter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-lotter/) > [Cooperation isn't the absence of conflict but a means of managing conflict.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deborah-tannen/cooperation-isn-t-the-absence-of-conflict-but-a-means-of-managing/) [Deborah Tannen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deborah-tannen/) > [Many are observing Ferguson and witnessing the anger, demonstrations, looting and vandalism and calling for quiet. But quiet isn't enough. The absence of noise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-jackson/many-are-observing-ferguson-and-witnessing-the-anger-demonstrations/) [Jesse Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-jackson/) > [Will capitalist economies operate at full employment in the absence of routine intervention? Certainly not. Are deviations from full employment a social problem? Obviously.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-yellen/will-capitalist-economies-operate-at-full-employment-in-the-absence/) [Janet Yellen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-yellen/) > [We must begin by acknowledging that there is a complete absence of two things in Indian Society. One of these is equality. On the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/b-r-ambedkar/we-must-begin-by-acknowledging-that-there-is-a-complete-absence-of/) [B. R. Ambedkar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/b-r-ambedkar/) [Browse all 2,057 Absence quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/absence/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can never be more than twelve years old with your parents. Parents earnestly try not to inflame, but their comments contain no scale and a strange focus. Discussing your private life with parents is like misguidedly looking at a zit in a car's rearview mirror and being convinced, in the absence of contrast or context, that you have developed combined heat rash and skin cancer.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Douglas Coupland" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-you-try-you-can-never-be-more/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Absence" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-you-try-you-can-never-be-more/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/080/douglas-coupland-305_absence_i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-yo_2870644.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I am reminded that no matter how hard you try, you can never be more than twelve years old with your…” — Douglas Coupland", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Douglas Coupland", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I am reminded that no matter...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-you-try-you-can-never-be-more/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-am-reminded-that-no-matter-how-hard-you-try-you-can-never-be-more/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```