--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: And then suddenly I realized that I was…" description: "\"“And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well, that I was actually feeling. My old personality was, after months of pills and pleasant nothing..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg" --- # And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well… ![“And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well, that I was actually feeling. My old personality was, after months of pills and pleasant nothingness, returning. Just the littlest bit- for I had only stopped taking my little yellow pills the day before- but my essence was already asserting…” quote by Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg) > ““And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well, that I was actually feeling. My old personality was, after months of pills and pleasant nothingness, returning. Just the littlest bit- for I had only stopped taking my little yellow pills the day before- but my essence was already asserting itself, however weakly at this point. I felt a lump in my throat, and I spent the rest of the day walking around this strange and beautiful city, remembering myself, what it used to feel like to be me, before I switched myself off, before I stopped listening to my inner voices.”” [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator becomes aware of his authentic self reemerging after medication suppressed his emotions, leading to a renewed, vivid experience of life. **In simple terms:** Self-awareness returns after suppression. Key Takeaway Listen to inner voice. Themes identity awakening mental health self-discovery Mood reflective hopeful introspective Type personal philosophical narrative When to use this quote - post‑medication reflection - city exploration - personal journaling Key Concepts psychology authenticity recovery Questions to Reflect On - How do you recognize when you’re “off” emotionally? - What practices keep your inner voice audible? A Different Perspective Self‑awareness can be fragile and may require ongoing effort. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Actually Feeling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/actually-feeling-592670/) [Feel Like](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feel-like/) [Feeling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feeling/) [Feeling Actually](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feeling-actually-719000/) [Life-after-god](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-after-god-106871/) [Realized Feeling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/realized-feeling-4677870/) [Walking around](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/walking-around/) ## Related quotes > [“I had been feeling permanently on the cusp of a flu, feeling at that point where I just wanted to borrow somebody else's coat-…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-had-been-feeling-permanently-on-the-cusp-of-a-flu-feeling-at-that/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“Some day you cross this thin line and you really realize that we need to protect ourselves from ourselves.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/some-day-you-cross-this-thin-line-and-you-really-realize-that-we-need/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“For there was once a time when we expected the worst. But then the worst happened, did it not? And so we will never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/for-there-was-once-a-time-when-we-expected-the-worst-but-then-the/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“Life was charmed but without politics or religion. It was the life of children of the children of the pioneers -life after God- a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/life-was-charmed-but-without-politics-or-religion-it-was-the-life-of/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“I realized that feeling isolated while with someone is the worst kind of loneliness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-james/i-realized-that-feeling-isolated-while-with-someone-is-the-worst-kind/) [Laura James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-james/) > [Love isn't actually a feeling at all--it's an illness, a certain condition of body and soul… Usually it takes possession of someone without his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ivan-turgenev/love-isn-t-actually-a-feeling-at-all-it-s-an-illness-a-certain/) [Ivan Turgenev](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ivan-turgenev/) > [“We won’t go any further than this, I promise. But please don’t ask me to stop where we already are. I need to watch…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/we-won-t-go-any-further-than-this-i-promise-but-please-don-t-ask-me/) [Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/) > [When I get into the moment of actually feeling like I want to write, to finish something, I do what I've always read authors…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ted-leo/when-i-get-into-the-moment-of-actually-feeling-like-i-want-to-write/) [Ted Leo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ted-leo/) > [There are these moments in life when two people just click and realize there's something special between them. The sad part is we often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/there-are-these-moments-in-life-when-two-people-just-click-and/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Sky, if you’re asking me to stop, I will. But I’m hoping you’re not, because I really don’t want to stop, so please.” He…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/sky-if-you-re-asking-me-to-stop-i-will-but-i-m-hoping-you-re-not/) [Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/) > [That horrible feeling, when you actually consider what'd it'd be like to get run over by a car…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/princess/that-horrible-feeling-when-you-actually-consider-what-d-it-d-be-like/) [Princess](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/princess/) > [A lot of us have a trauma response of over-explaining and taking you away from what you're actually feeling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-lou-wood/a-lot-of-us-have-a-trauma-response-of-over-explaining-and-taking-you/) [Aimee Lou Wood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-lou-wood/) > [When you're actually feeling a character and you're going through the real emotions, and you're not fake acting, that energy stays with you and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tinsel-korey/when-you-re-actually-feeling-a-character-and-you-re-going-through-the/) [Tinsel Korey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tinsel-korey/) > [I never have the feeling that I actually know what I'm doing or anything that I'm writing is any good.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-cameron/i-never-have-the-feeling-that-i-actually-know-what-i-m-doing-or/) [Sharon Cameron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-cameron/) > [Melancholy is a state that I very much enjoy being in, actually. It's not the same as feeling sad. It's a more complex emotion;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johann-johannsson/melancholy-is-a-state-that-i-very-much-enjoy-being-in-actually-it-s/) [Johann Johannsson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johann-johannsson/) ## More by Douglas Coupland > [And in your new lives you'll have to live entirely for that one sensation-that of imminent truth. And you're going to have to holler…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-in-your-new-lives-you-ll-have-to-live-entirely-for-that-one/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [A man in a bookstore buys a book on loneliness and every woman in the store hits on him. A woman buys a book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/a-man-in-a-bookstore-buys-a-book-on-loneliness-and-every-woman-in-the/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [The future and eternity are two entirely different things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/the-future-and-eternity-are-two-entirely-different-things/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Do you remember how you felt at seventeen? I do and I don't (...) Imagine you came from outer space and someone showed you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/do-you-remember-how-you-felt-at-seventeen-i-do-and-i-don-t-imagine/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [You can't fake competence, creativity, or sexual arousal.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/you-can-t-fake-competence-creativity-or-sexual-arousal/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“But Dag, for all of his efforts, might as well have been talking to a cat. Our parents’ generation seems neither able nor interested…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/but-dag-for-all-of-his-efforts-might-as-well-have-been-talking-to-a/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Negative? Moi? I think realistic might be a better word. You mean to tell me we can drive all the way here from L.A.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/negative-moi-i-think-realistic-might-be-a-better-word-you-mean-to/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [It was pivotal in making you but you don't remember it. Or do you? Do we understand the events that make us who we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/it-was-pivotal-in-making-you-but-you-don-t-remember-it-or-do-you-do/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Your ability to rationalize your own bad deeds makes you believe that the whole world is as amoral as you are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/your-ability-to-rationalize-your-own-bad-deeds-makes-you-believe-that/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“I like to go beach-combing, and I like to find interestingly shaped rocks. When I really get into the groove I start finding beautiful…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-like-to-go-beach-combing-and-i-like-to-find-interestingly-shaped/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“You know, Dag and Claire smile a lot, as do many people I know. But I always wondered if there is something either mechanical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/you-know-dag-and-claire-smile-a-lot-as-do-many-people-i-know-but-i/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/brain-research-tells-us-that-only-twenty-percent-of-human-beings-have/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [I keep vampire hours, going to bed at 2 A.M. and waking up at about 10:30-11 A.M.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-keep-vampire-hours-going-to-bed-at-2-a-m-and-waking-up-at-about-10/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [“Anna-Louise leans over and whispers in my ear. "This is so surreal," she says, "I think I'm turning into a melting clock.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/anna-louise-leans-over-and-whispers-in-my-ear-this-is-so-surreal-she/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) > [When you grow up these days, you're told you're going to have four or five different careers during your lifetime. But what they don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/when-you-grow-up-these-days-you-re-told-you-re-going-to-have-four-or/) [Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) [Explore all 704 Douglas Coupland quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/) ## More Feeling quotes > [Being betrayed by the one you love is the worst feeling in the world...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-betrayed-by-the-one-you-love-is-the-worst-feeling-in-the-world/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [My feeling has always been that 'Good Eats' would have never happened had it been left to a committee.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alton-brown/my-feeling-has-always-been-that-good-eats-would-have-never-happened/) [Alton Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alton-brown/) > [“THE ESSENCE OF YOUR DESIRE IS A FEELING”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danielle-laporte/the-essence-of-your-desire-is-a-feeling/) [Danielle LaPorte](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danielle-laporte/) > [Tryna hide this pain with these pain killers, she said the storms only will last a little while but shit it got me feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myself/tryna-hide-this-pain-with-these-pain-killers-she-said-the-storms-only/) [Myself](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myself/) > [If the media is sending girls the message that their value lies in their bodies, this can only leave them feeling disempowered and distract…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-siebel-newsom/if-the-media-is-sending-girls-the-message-that-their-value-lies-in/) [Jennifer Siebel Newsom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-siebel-newsom/) > [Hate not knowing when things are going to happen feeling different every single day. It is called LIFE…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-valdovinos/hate-not-knowing-when-things-are-going-to-happen-feeling-different/) [Stephanie Valdovinos](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-valdovinos/) > [The best feeling comes when you realise, that you are perfectly happy without the things, once you thought you needed the most…!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-best-feeling-comes-when-you-realise-that-you-are-perfectly-happy/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I love transforming myself constantly because it gives me that 'new' feeling that I'm very much addicted to.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-mondo/i-love-transforming-myself-constantly-because-it-gives-me-that-new/) [Brad Mondo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-mondo/) > [I have to feel the audience. I enjoy that feeling of community.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-gahan/i-have-to-feel-the-audience-i-enjoy-that-feeling-of-community/) [Dave Gahan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-gahan/) > [There has always been a feeling with people that they love my singing but not always the choice of material.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-moyet/there-has-always-been-a-feeling-with-people-that-they-love-my-singing/) [Alison Moyet](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-moyet/) > [It definitely helps to have the acting experience going into singing, because when you're singing, you have to portray the emotion you were feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryan-newman/it-definitely-helps-to-have-the-acting-experience-going-into-singing/) [Ryan Newman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryan-newman/) > [What I do miss that I don't get anymore? You're going to think I'm crazy, but you want the truth, so here it is.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barbara-mandrell/what-i-do-miss-that-i-don-t-get-anymore-you-re-going-to-think-i-m/) [Barbara Mandrell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barbara-mandrell/) > [I think kids growing up, if they were picked on and feeling inferior at 12, they're going to feel that way at 72. You…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvester-stallone/i-think-kids-growing-up-if-they-were-picked-on-and-feeling-inferior/) [Sylvester Stallone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvester-stallone/) > [I don't think Alfonso was a big expert on Potter either. He was feeling his way through it more than I was.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-thewlis/i-don-t-think-alfonso-was-a-big-expert-on-potter-either-he-was/) [David Thewlis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-thewlis/) > [The most difficult part for me is feeling connected to the people that I love but always being on the go to different places.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-franti/the-most-difficult-part-for-me-is-feeling-connected-to-the-people/) [Michael Franti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-franti/) [Browse all 8,809 Feeling quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feeling/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well, that I was actually feeling. My old personality was, after months of pills and pleasant nothingness, returning. Just the littlest bit- for I had only stopped taking my little yellow pills the day before- but my essence was already asserting itself, however weakly at this point. I felt a lump in my throat, and I spent the rest of the day walking around this strange and beautiful city, remembering myself, what it used to feel like to be me, before I switched myself off, before I stopped listening to my inner voices.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Douglas Coupland" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was-feeling-well-that-i-was/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Feeling" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was-feeling-well-that-i-was/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a40/douglas-coupland-305_life-after-god_and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was_2227322.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“And then suddenly I realized that I was feeling- well, that I was actually feeling. My old personality was…” — Douglas Coupland", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Douglas Coupland", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“And then suddenly I realized that...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was-feeling-well-that-i-was/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/and-then-suddenly-i-realized-that-i-was-feeling-well-that-i-was/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```