--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But the anger is not related to him. Long…" description: "\"“But the anger is not related to him. Long ago, in the course of the sessions with Mother Sugar, I learned that the resentment, the anger, is impersona..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ca/doris-lessing-501_anger_but-the-anger-is-not-related-to-him-long_835655.png" --- # But the anger is not related to him. Long ago, in the… ![“But the anger is not related to him. Long ago, in the course of the sessions with Mother Sugar, I learned that the resentment, the anger, is impersonal. It is the disease of women in our time. I can see it in women’s faces, their voices, every day, or in the letters that come to the office. The…” quote by Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ca/doris-lessing-501_anger_but-the-anger-is-not-related-to-him-long_835655.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ca/doris-lessing-501_anger_but-the-anger-is-not-related-to-him-long_835655.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ca/doris-lessing-501_anger_but-the-anger-is-not-related-to-him-long_835655.png) > ““But the anger is not related to him. Long ago, in the course of the sessions with Mother Sugar, I learned that the resentment, the anger, is impersonal. It is the disease of women in our time. I can see it in women’s faces, their voices, every day, or in the letters that come to the office. The woman’s emotion: resentment against injustice, an impersonal poison. The unlucky ones, who do not know it is impersonal, turn it against their men. The lucky ones like me—fight it. It is a tiring fight.”” [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Resentment in women is portrayed as a collective, impersonal disease stemming from injustice, which can be misdirected or fought. **In simple terms:** Women’s anger is a shared, impersonal poison caused by unfairness. Key Takeaway Recognize and confront systemic injustice rather than personalizing anger. Themes gender justice psychology resilience Mood frustrated hopeful determined Type critical reflective inspirational When to use this quote - workplace - family dynamics - activism - personal relationships Key Concepts collective trauma impersonal anger social critique Questions to Reflect On - How does societal injustice fuel personal resentment? - What strategies can prevent misdirected anger? A Different Perspective Personal anger may mask deeper systemic issues, making change harder. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Anger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) [Anger Impersonal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger-impersonal-597748/) [Emotion Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotion-resentment-597750/) [Every day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/every-day/) [Long ago](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/long-ago/) [Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment/) [Resentment Anger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment-anger-597749/) [Resentment Injustice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment-injustice-597751/) ## Related quotes > [I feel that rich women are soft targets… There's a lot of legitimate resentment and anger about inequality in our culture, about money... I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wednesday-martin/i-feel-that-rich-women-are-soft-targets-there-s-a-lot-of-legitimate/) [Wednesday Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wednesday-martin/) > [I believe in any kind of personal growth practice that can help you gather the tools that you can then apply to resentment, anger,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-bernstein/i-believe-in-any-kind-of-personal-growth-practice-that-can-help-you/) [Gabrielle Bernstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-bernstein/) > [Don't let bitterness, resentment or anger against someone take root in your life, it could be stopping you from your breakthrough. Learn to forgive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/don-t-let-bitterness-resentment-or-anger-against-someone-take-root-in/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [ There was no civility, there was no sophistication, there was nothing but raw resentment and anger on the part of the Hillary \[Clinton\] campaign… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rush-limbaugh/there-was-no-civility-there-was-no-sophistication-there-was-nothing/) [Rush Limbaugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rush-limbaugh/) > [Feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pema-ch-dr-n/feelings-like-disappointment-embarrassment-irritation-resentment-2/) [Pema Chodron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pema-ch-dr-n/) > [“Yes, it's hard to start seeing your mother as she is, hard to push aside all the resentment and anger that you may feel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathleen-gilles-seidel/yes-it-s-hard-to-start-seeing-your-mother-as-she-is-hard-to-push/) [Kathleen Gilles Seidel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathleen-gilles-seidel/) > [The internal conflict due to passive behavior can lead to stress,resentment, anger feelings of victimization, desire to exact revenge.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dranil-kr-sinha/the-internal-conflict-due-to-passive-behavior-can-lead-to-stress/) [DrAnil Kr Sinha](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dranil-kr-sinha/) > [Resentment and anger are bad for your blood pressure and your digestion.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/desmond-tutu/resentment-and-anger-are-bad-for-your-blood-pressure-and-your/) [Desmond Tutu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/desmond-tutu/) > [Guilt is anger directed at ourselves - at what we did or did not do. Resentment is anger directed at others - at what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-mcwilliams/guilt-is-anger-directed-at-ourselves-at-what-we-did-or-did-not-do/) [Peter McWilliams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-mcwilliams/) > [Resentment, anger, frustration, worry, disappointment-negative emotional states, justified or not, take a toll on your heart, brain and body. Don't let justified emotions rob…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-martin/resentment-anger-frustration-worry-disappointment-negative-emotional/) [Howard Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-martin/) > [“Resentment is anger looking for payback. It's also a high-interest-earning emotion. Each new resentment is added to the ones from before. Long marriages have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/augusten-burroughs/resentment-is-anger-looking-for-payback-it-s-also-a-high-interest/) [Augusten Burroughs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/augusten-burroughs/) > […feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pema-ch-dr-n/feelings-like-disappointment-embarrassment-irritation-resentment-3/) [Pema Chodron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pema-ch-dr-n/) > [“The only alternative to talking is the building up of resentment and anger, which in the time must inevitably become open hostility and conflict.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gustav-niebuhr/the-only-alternative-to-talking-is-the-building-up-of-resentment-and/) [Gustav Niebuhr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gustav-niebuhr/) > [Feelings like disappointment,í embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/feelings-like-disappointment-embarrassment-irritation-resentment/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [“Your difficulty can be hard enough, but the resentment or anger you drag along with it can be even more debilitating than the difficulty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-rothschild/your-difficulty-can-be-hard-enough-but-the-resentment-or-anger-you/) [Jennifer Rothschild](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-rothschild/) ## More by Doris Lessing > [Some books are not read in the right way because they have skipped a stage of opinion, assume a crystallization of information in society…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/some-books-are-not-read-in-the-right-way-because-they-have-skipped-a/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [“In the morning, when she wishes me to wake, she crouches on my chest, and pats my face with her paw. Or, if I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/in-the-morning-when-she-wishes-me-to-wake-she-crouches-on-my-chest/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [You know, whenever women make imaginary female kingdoms in literature, they are always very permissive, to use the jargon word, and easy and generous…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/you-know-whenever-women-make-imaginary-female-kingdoms-in-literature/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [There is only one real sin and that is to persuade oneself that the second best is anything but second best.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/there-is-only-one-real-sin-and-that-is-to-persuade-oneself-that-the/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [“She was using the water as she had used the fruit earlier—to calm herself, to assure herself of the possibility of normality. Yet all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/she-was-using-the-water-as-she-had-used-the-fruit-earlier-to-calm/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [I remember World War II when there were very few books, very little paper available. For me to walk into a shop or look…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/i-remember-world-war-ii-when-there-were-very-few-books-very-little/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [They can't give a Nobel to someone who's dead so I think they were probably thinking they had better give it to me now…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/they-can-t-give-a-nobel-to-someone-who-s-dead-so-i-think-they-were/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [“While she strode rapidly through the ward to the door at the other end, she was able to see that every bed or cot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/while-she-strode-rapidly-through-the-ward-to-the-door-at-the-other/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [I do not think that marriage is one of my talents. I've been much happier unmarried than married.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/i-do-not-think-that-marriage-is-one-of-my-talents-i-ve-been-much/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [I haven't got the energy to write now.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/i-haven-t-got-the-energy-to-write-now/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [What really fascinates me is this need that is so strong now that if you read a work of the imagination you instantly have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/what-really-fascinates-me-is-this-need-that-is-so-strong-now-that-if/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [“The charge that the United Nations are using bacteriological warfare in Korea cannot be dismissed merely because it would be insane.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/the-charge-that-the-united-nations-are-using-bacteriological-warfare/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [What I did have, which others perhaps didn't, was a capacity for sticking at it, which really is the point, not the talent at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/what-i-did-have-which-others-perhaps-didn-t-was-a-capacity-for/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [The human community is evolving... . We can survive anything you care to mention. We are supremely equipped to survive, to adapt and even…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/the-human-community-is-evolving-we-can-survive-anything-you-care-to/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [So love is rest? The cosy corner? The little nook? Sometimes it ought to be. Sometimes it is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/so-love-is-rest-the-cosy-corner-the-little-nook-sometimes-it-ought-to/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) [Explore all 508 Doris Lessing quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) ## More Anger quotes > [“If I let myself think of it the pain and anger were still fresh, adrenalin racing down my limbs to pool, hot and itchy,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kylie-ladd/if-i-let-myself-think-of-it-the-pain-and-anger-were-still-fresh/) [Kylie Ladd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kylie-ladd/) > [I receive something we might euphemistically call an 'inappropriately hostile' response - that is to say, more than fair criticism or even fair anger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-beard/i-receive-something-we-might-euphemistically-call-an-inappropriately/) [Mary Beard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-beard/) > [The vision of the left, full of envy and resentment, takes its worst toll on those at the bottom - whether black or white…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-sowell/the-vision-of-the-left-full-of-envy-and-resentment-takes-its-worst/) [Thomas Sowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-sowell/) > [Anger is a rough water; if you can canalize it into a water mill, you can benefit from it. Anything bad can be transformed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/anger-is-a-rough-water-if-you-can-canalize-it-into-a-water-mill-you/) [Mehmet Murat Ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/) > [“Some say the Earth is angry Because he wants no company; I say the Earth is angry Because he lives alone.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/some-say-the-earth-is-angry-because-he-wants-no-company-i-say-the/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“When you feel terribly angry, you're possessed by anger ghost.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/toba-beta/when-you-feel-terribly-angry-you-re-possessed-by-anger-ghost/) [Toba Beta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/toba-beta/) > [“Medical studies have shown that cursing reduces levels of stress and pain. Repressing your anger is not healthy. It's much better to verbalize it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oliver-markus-malloy/medical-studies-have-shown-that-cursing-reduces-levels-of-stress-and/) [Oliver Markus Malloy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oliver-markus-malloy/) > [My care will be in the heart n not in words My anger will be in Words n not in the Heart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/my-care-will-be-in-the-heart-n-not-in-words-my-anger-will-be-in-words/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [You should be angry. You must not be bitter. Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. It doesn't do anything to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/you-should-be-angry-you-must-not-be-bitter-bitterness-is-like-cancer/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/to-be-a-negro-in-this-country-and-to-be-relatively-conscious-is-to-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/god-you-had-enough-time-to-have-been-through-it-three-times-you-ve/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [The present contains nothing more than the past, and what is found in the effect was already in the cause.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henri-bergson/the-present-contains-nothing-more-than-the-past-and-what-is-found-in/) [Henri Bergson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henri-bergson/) > [Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-wright/depression-is-merely-anger-without-enthusiasm/) [Steven Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-wright/) > [I always fight better when my opponent's angry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-haye/i-always-fight-better-when-my-opponent-s-angry/) [David Haye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-haye/) > [ “Where there are kashays (anger-pride-deceit-greed), there is worldly life. As long as anger-pride-deceit-greed exist; one is a sansaari \[living a worldly life\] regardless of… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dada-bhagwan/where-there-are-kashays-anger-pride-deceit-greed-there-is-worldly/) [Dada Bhagwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dada-bhagwan/) [Browse all 7,469 Anger quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“But the anger is not related to him. Long ago, in the course of the sessions with Mother Sugar, I learned that the resentment, the anger, is impersonal. It is the disease of women in our time. I can see it in women’s faces, their voices, every day, or in the letters that come to the office. The woman’s emotion: resentment against injustice, an impersonal poison. The unlucky ones, who do not know it is impersonal, turn it against their men. The lucky ones like me—fight it. 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