--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us…" description: "\"Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us miserable. It was supposed to make us free; to give women the power to shape their fortunes and work for a more jus..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3c/debora-spar-24663_and-love_feminism-wasn-t-supposed-to-make-us-mise_1638489.png" --- # Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us miserable. It was… ![“Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us miserable. It was supposed to make us free; to give women the power to shape their fortunes and work for a more just world. Today, women have choices that their grandmothers could not have imagined. The challenge lies in recognizing that having choices carries…” quote by Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3c/debora-spar-24663_and-love_feminism-wasn-t-supposed-to-make-us-mise_1638489.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3c/debora-spar-24663_and-love_feminism-wasn-t-supposed-to-make-us-mise_1638489.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3c/debora-spar-24663_and-love_feminism-wasn-t-supposed-to-make-us-mise_1638489.png) > “Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us miserable. It was supposed to make us free; to give women the power to shape their fortunes and work for a more just world. Today, women have choices that their grandmothers could not have imagined. The challenge lies in recognizing that having choices carries the responsibility to make them wisely, striving not for perfection or the ephemeral all, but for lives and loves that matter.” [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Feminism aims for freedom and responsibility; choices empower women but require wise, purposeful decisions. **In simple terms:** Freedom brings responsibility for choices. Key Takeaway Make thoughtful choices that align with values. Themes feminism empowerment responsibility Mood inspirational thoughtful Type philosophical motivational When to use this quote - career planning - family decisions - activism - financial independence Key Concepts agency ethical decision‑making social justice Questions to Reflect On - How do you balance freedom with responsibility? - What criteria guide your most important decisions? A Different Perspective Overemphasis on choice can cause anxiety. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [And love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/and-love/) [Carrie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/carrie/) [Challenges](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/challenges/) [Choices](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choices/) [Choices Grandmothers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choices-grandmothers-546532/) [Ephemeral](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ephemeral/) [Feminism](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feminism/) [Feminism Wasn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feminism-wasn-546530/) [Fortune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fortune/) [Giving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/giving/) [Grandmother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grandmother/) [Life and love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-and-love/) [Lying](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lying/) [Make Miserable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/make-miserable/) [Matter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/matter/) [Miserable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/miserable/) [Miserable Supposed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/miserable-supposed-546533/) [Perfection](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perfection/) [Recognizing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/recognizing/) [Responsibility](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/responsibility/) [Shapes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/shapes/) [Strive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/strive/) [Today](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/today/) [Women Choices](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/women-choices-546531/) [World](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/) [World today](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world-today/) ## Related quotes > [If you're always strict with yourself, life gets miserable. And we're supposed to enjoy life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mia-maestro/if-you-re-always-strict-with-yourself-life-gets-miserable-and-we-re/) [Mia Maestro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mia-maestro/) > [When I grew up, feminism wasn’t something that was really talked about. There’s a really negative stereotype about feminism in the media. That really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-zeilinger/when-i-grew-up-feminism-wasn-t-something-that-was-really-talked-about/) [Julie Zeilinger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-zeilinger/) > [I never really considered myself much of a feminist until I left Wall Street. I did all the right things - such as put…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sallie-krawcheck/i-never-really-considered-myself-much-of-a-feminist-until-i-left-wall/) [Sallie Krawcheck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sallie-krawcheck/) > [If feminism wasn't powerful, if feminism wasn't influential, people wouldn't spend so much time putting it down.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jessica-valenti/if-feminism-wasn-t-powerful-if-feminism-wasn-t-influential-people/) [Jessica Valenti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jessica-valenti/) > [I wish feminism wasn't so scary to people. It should be an evolving concept. I think it's an umbrella term to embrace conflicting ideas.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/merritt-wever/i-wish-feminism-wasn-t-so-scary-to-people-it-should-be-an-evolving/) [Merritt Wever](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/merritt-wever/) > [Feminism wasn't really at the top of my vocabulary. I think what's been interesting for me - let me say this delicately - when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/whitney-wolfe-herd/feminism-wasn-t-really-at-the-top-of-my-vocabulary-i-think-what-s/) [Whitney Wolfe Herd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/whitney-wolfe-herd/) > [“Your life can be different, Young Ju. Study and be strong. In America, women have choices.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/an-na/your-life-can-be-different-young-ju-study-and-be-strong-in-america/) [An Na](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/an-na/) > [I do consider myself a postfeminist. I just want women to have choices - they can be CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, or they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meghan-mccain/i-do-consider-myself-a-postfeminist-i-just-want-women-to-have-choices/) [Meghan McCain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meghan-mccain/) > [“All these much-celebrated choices that we have, apparently, us modern women. There are no choices, only higher expectations. Except”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jo-furniss/all-these-much-celebrated-choices-that-we-have-apparently-us-modern/) [Jo Furniss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jo-furniss/) > [Women have choices, and men have responsibilities.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-martin/women-have-choices-and-men-have-responsibilities/) [Steve Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-martin/) > [When we frame women's choices in terms of extreme work or extreme mothering, women think they have to define themselves in terms of a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-simmons/when-we-frame-women-s-choices-in-terms-of-extreme-work-or-extreme/) [Rachel Simmons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-simmons/) > [Women have to be the biggest champions in the world of other women's choices.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dee-dee-myers/women-have-to-be-the-biggest-champions-in-the-world-of-other-women-s/) [Dee Dee Myers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dee-dee-myers/) > [Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-allen/women-now-have-choices-they-can-be-married-not-married-have-a-job-not/) [Tim Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-allen/) > [I love my sons, I love my husband, and I love my country. But in kingdoms of men, there are few - if any…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manal-al-sharif/i-love-my-sons-i-love-my-husband-and-i-love-my-country-but-in/) [Manal al-Sharif](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manal-al-sharif/) > [I'm pro-choice because I've never been a fourteen-year-old incest victim pregnant by her father, or a woman who's going to die if the pregnancy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurell-k-hamilton/i-m-pro-choice-because-i-ve-never-been-a-fourteen-year-old-incest/) [Laurell K. Hamilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurell-k-hamilton/) ## More by Debora Spar > [I think sometimes by portraying our lives as being too perfect, as being too balanced, we're actually selling younger women a bill of goods…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-think-sometimes-by-portraying-our-lives-as-being-too-perfect-as/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [I think what women are doing to themselves is that they're seeing these different images of perfection - the perfect wife, the perfect mother,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-think-what-women-are-doing-to-themselves-is-that-they-re-seeing/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [I think one thing that women can do is to just be more honest, with themselves and with their friends, and be more willing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-think-one-thing-that-women-can-do-is-to-just-be-more-honest-with/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [I really don't see any men sitting in the corner office plotting to keep women out. All the men I know are actively trying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-really-don-t-see-any-men-sitting-in-the-corner-office-plotting-to/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [Don't take too much credit for your children - or too much blame!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/don-t-take-too-much-credit-for-your-children-or-too-much-blame/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [We've reached the point where the demand for rules is about to replace the demand for chaos.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/we-ve-reached-the-point-where-the-demand-for-rules-is-about-to/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [I certainly wouldn't go back and blame feminism, because all that feminism was really trying to do, which was huge, was to create a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-certainly-wouldn-t-go-back-and-blame-feminism-because-all-that/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [It's oppressive. ... It's food, it's clothing, it's all the magazines that come under the heading of things looking simple. Men's magazines don't seem…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/it-s-oppressive-it-s-food-it-s-clothing-it-s-all-the-magazines-that/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [They're coming out of high school exhausted. The pressure in high school is killing these kids. By the time they get to college, they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/they-re-coming-out-of-high-school-exhausted-the-pressure-in-high/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [We must...forge partnerships with those around us, and begin to dismantle the myth of solitary perfection.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/we-must-forge-partnerships-with-those-around-us-and-begin-to/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [If two people have a couple of kids, somebody does have to take care of the kids. Somebody does have to cook dinner; somebody…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/if-two-people-have-a-couple-of-kids-somebody-does-have-to-take-care/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [I think what we need to do is to step back as a society and say okay, we've kind of turned things upside-down. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/i-think-what-we-need-to-do-is-to-step-back-as-a-society-and-say-okay/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [Rather than seeing the opportunities that feminism created they very easy morph into expectations.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/rather-than-seeing-the-opportunities-that-feminism-created-they-very/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > ['Maybe' is what gets us into trouble, because I think constantly women are saying I'll try to do it, maybe I'll do it, I'll…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/maybe-is-what-gets-us-into-trouble-because-i-think-constantly-women/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) > [Women are racing all the time to try to have a perfect house and perfect kids and be a perfect cook. Men, somehow, for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debora-spar/women-are-racing-all-the-time-to-try-to-have-a-perfect-house-and/) [Debora Spar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) [Explore all 24 Debora Spar quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debora-spar/) ## More And love quotes > [Broken by hardships, disappointments and tragedy, people can become discouraged and cynical. But lives can also be mended. Put back together well, they won't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-goodier/broken-by-hardships-disappointments-and-tragedy-people-can-become/) [Steve Goodier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-goodier/) > [By making conscious choices in our behavior and where we focus our attention, we can transform our experience of our body, decrease our biological…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/by-making-conscious-choices-in-our-behavior-and-where-we-focus-our/) [Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/) > [We need, in a special way, to work twice as hard to help people understand that animals are fellow creatures, that we must protect…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cesar-chavez/we-need-in-a-special-way-to-work-twice-as-hard-to-help-people/) [Cesar Chavez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cesar-chavez/) > [There are few husbands whom the wife cannot win in the long run, by patience and love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-of-valois/there-are-few-husbands-whom-the-wife-cannot-win-in-the-long-run-by/) [Margaret of Valois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-of-valois/) > [There's little in taking or giving, There's little in water or wine: This living, this living, this living, Was never a project of mine.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-parker/there-s-little-in-taking-or-giving-there-s-little-in-water-or-wine/) [Dorothy Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-parker/) > [We'll walk together holding hands, and kiss in broad daylight, and love each other as much as we want to, and no one will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-oliver/we-ll-walk-together-holding-hands-and-kiss-in-broad-daylight-and-love/) [Lauren Oliver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-oliver/) > [Anyone who knows me knows that I am really into hair. 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You have to find the redeeming quality and love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeannette-walls/you-should-never-hate-anyone-even-your-worst-enemies-everyone-has/) [Jeannette Walls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeannette-walls/) > [I rejoice that the reign of Christ is such, while it thrills the soul with emotions, and opens before the highest intellect the most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matthew-simpson/i-rejoice-that-the-reign-of-christ-is-such-while-it-thrills-the-soul/) [Matthew Simpson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matthew-simpson/) > [If you abide in the love of Christ, rooted in the faith, you will encounter, even amid setbacks and suffering, the source of true…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-benedict-xvi/if-you-abide-in-the-love-of-christ-rooted-in-the-faith-you-will/) [Pope Benedict XVI](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-benedict-xvi/) [Browse all 2,635 And love quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/and-love/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Feminism wasn’t supposed to make us miserable. 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