--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: lover , n . Oh, how I hated this word. So…" description: "\"“ lover , n . Oh, how I hated this word. So pretentious, like it was always being translated from the French. The tint and taint of illicit, illegitima..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/706/david-levithan-67_love_lover-n-oh-how-i-hated-this-word-so-pret_1668249.jpg" --- # lover , n . Oh, how I hated this word. So pretentious… ![“lover , n . Oh, how I hated this word. So pretentious, like it was always being translated from the French. The tint and taint of illicit, illegitimate affections. Dictionary meaning: a person having a love affair . Impermanent. Unfamilial. Inextricably linked to sex. I have never wanted a lover…” quote by David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/706/david-levithan-67_love_lover-n-oh-how-i-hated-this-word-so-pret_1668249.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/706/david-levithan-67_love_lover-n-oh-how-i-hated-this-word-so-pret_1668249.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/706/david-levithan-67_love_lover-n-oh-how-i-hated-this-word-so-pret_1668249.jpg) > ““ lover , n . Oh, how I hated this word. So pretentious, like it was always being translated from the French. The tint and taint of illicit, illegitimate affections. Dictionary meaning: a person having a love affair . Impermanent. Unfamilial. Inextricably linked to sex. I have never wanted a lover. In order to have a lover, I must go back to the root of the word. For I have never wanted a lover, but I have always wanted lover, and to be loved. There is no word for the recipient of the love. There is only a word for the giver. There is the assumption that lovers come in pairs. When I say, Be my lover , I don't mean, Let's have an affair . I don't mean Sleep with me . I don't mean, Be my secret . I want us to go back to that root. I want you to be the one who loves me. I want to be the one who loves you.”” [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker critiques the word “lover” for its connotations of illicit, temporary, and sexual relationships, urging a return to its root meaning of mutual love without expectations. **In simple terms:** The term “lover” is seen as pretentious and limited to sexual affairs, missing the pure desire to be loved and to love. Key Takeaway Seek relationships based on genuine, reciprocal love rather than labels. Themes love language identity relationships sexuality Mood reflective thoughtful Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - romantic partnerships - friendships - family dynamics - personal self‑reflection Key Concepts semantic critique gender norms emotional intimacy Questions to Reflect On - How can we redefine “lover” to include non‑sexual love? - What labels limit our expression of love? A Different Perspective The word may still carry cultural baggage that resists reinterpretation. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Affair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affair/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Love affair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-affair/) [Lover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lover/) [Lovers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lovers/) ## Related quotes > [When I say, "Be my lover", I don't mean, "Let's have an affair." I don't mean "Sleep with me." 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Inextricably linked to sex. I have never wanted a lover. In order to have a lover, I must go back to the root of the word. For I have never wanted a lover, but I have always wanted lover, and to be loved. There is no word for the recipient of the love. There is only a word for the giver. There is the assumption that lovers come in pairs. When I say, Be my lover , I don't mean, Let's have an affair . I don't mean Sleep with me . I don't mean, Be my secret . I want us to go back to that root. I want you to be the one who loves me. 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