--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Kindness connects to who you are, while…" description: "\"Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to who you want to be.\" — David Levithan" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg" --- # Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects… ![“Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to who you want to be.” quote by David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg) > “Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to who you want to be.” [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Kindness reflects authentic self, while niceness is a performance aimed at approval. **In simple terms:** Kindness is genuine; niceness is superficial. Key Takeaway Be authentic in caring. Themes authenticity relationships self‑image Mood reflective insightful Type ethical psychological When to use this quote - friendship - workplace dynamics - personal growth Key Concepts kindness niceness social perception Questions to Reflect On - Do you value kindness over niceness? - When does niceness become harmful? ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Connects Niceness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/connects-niceness-579236/) [Connects Want](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/connects-want-1395316/) [Kindness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/kindness/) [Kindness Connects](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/kindness-connects-1395315/) [Nice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nice/) [Niceness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/niceness/) [Niceness Connects](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/niceness-connects-579235/) [Personality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/personality/) ## Related quotes > [“Kindness connects to who you are, niceness connects to how you want to be seen.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-niceness-connects-to-how-you-want-to/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to how you want to be seen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-niceness-connects-to-how-you/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“She's being kind. Which is much more a sign of character than mere niceness. Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/she-s-being-kind-which-is-much-more-a-sign-of-character-than-mere/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [I no longer think she's just being nice. She's being kind. Which is much more a sign of character than mere niceness. Kindness connects…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/i-no-longer-think-she-s-just-being-nice-she-s-being-kind-which-is/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“(Kindness) is much more a sign of character than mere niceness. Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to how you want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-is-much-more-a-sign-of-character-than-mere-niceness-kindness-2/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [ “\[Kindness\] is much more a sign of character than mere niceness. Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to how you want… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-is-much-more-a-sign-of-character-than-mere-niceness-kindness/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“The pleasure of kindness is that it connects us with others; but the terror of kindness is that it makes us too immediately aware…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-phillips/the-pleasure-of-kindness-is-that-it-connects-us-with-others-but-the/) [Adam Phillips](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-phillips/) > [This is what happens when nice people are pushed too far. We give too many chances, and so when we've finally had enough, we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deb-caletti/this-is-what-happens-when-nice-people-are-pushed-too-far-we-give-too/) [Deb Caletti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deb-caletti/) > [Human beings need to watch out for reasonless niceness too. It's never reasonless and its reason's not usually nice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-mitchell/human-beings-need-to-watch-out-for-reasonless-niceness-too-it-s-never/) [David Mitchell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-mitchell/) > [It's a dirty little secret that most New Yorkers are pleasant, thoughtful, patient, and polite. The Chamber of Commerce must work overtime to maintain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-kelman/it-s-a-dirty-little-secret-that-most-new-yorkers-are-pleasant/) [Judith Kelman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-kelman/) > [“they were nice in a useless sort of way, which is, after all, the only way to be truly nice.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-r-delany/they-were-nice-in-a-useless-sort-of-way-which-is-after-all-the-only/) [Samuel R. Delany](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-r-delany/) > [A lot of warm vulgarity is incomparably preferable to a little bit of pinched niceness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caitlin-thomas/a-lot-of-warm-vulgarity-is-incomparably-preferable-to-a-little-bit-of/) [Caitlin Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caitlin-thomas/) > [One thing that I think never goes out of style is just purity. Niceness and purity. And the Muppets have never lost that. Kermit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jason-segel/one-thing-that-i-think-never-goes-out-of-style-is-just-purity/) [Jason Segel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jason-segel/) > [I hate niceness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-starkey/i-hate-niceness/) [David Starkey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-starkey/) > [“People who switch their niceness on and off are not to be trusted.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lucy-diamond/people-who-switch-their-niceness-on-and-off-are-not-to-be-trusted/) [Lucy Diamond](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lucy-diamond/) ## More by David Levithan > [“When you jump, all you're going to do is fall. But leaping? Leaping is when you think there's something on the other side.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/when-you-jump-all-you-re-going-to-do-is-fall-but-leaping-leaping-is/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“The past and the future are what's complicated. It's the present that's simple. And the simplicity is the sensation of it being just her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/the-past-and-the-future-are-what-s-complicated-it-s-the-present-that/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“I hate the way you talk to me And the way you cut your hair I hate the way you drive my car I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/i-hate-the-way-you-talk-to-me-and-the-way-you-cut-your-hair-i-hate/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [You could be the leaf that never falls from the tree you could be the sun that never leaves the sky this might be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/you-could-be-the-leaf-that-never-falls-from-the-tree-you-could-be-the/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“Patrick: Is she worth the trouble? Cameron: I thought she was- Patrick: Either she is, or she isn't. So give it a shot, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/patrick-is-she-worth-the-trouble-cameron-i-thought-she-was-patrick/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“We saw our friends die. But we also see our friends live. So many of them live, and we often toast their long and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/we-saw-our-friends-die-but-we-also-see-our-friends-live-so-many-of/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [maybe tonight you're scared of falling, and maybe there's somebody here or somewhere else you're thinking about, worrying over, fretting over, trying to figure…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/maybe-tonight-you-re-scared-of-falling-and-maybe-there-s-somebody/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“You never told me what you saw in him, not convincingly.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/you-never-told-me-what-you-saw-in-him-not-convincingly/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“i nod to the other will grayson, up onstage. he nods to me. we have something between us, him and me. but the truth?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/i-nod-to-the-other-will-grayson-up-onstage-he-nods-to-me-we-have/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [The terrorists-those nineteen people, with hundreds or maybe thousands behind them-did the worst thing you can possibly imagine. But tens of millions people did…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/the-terrorists-those-nineteen-people-with-hundreds-or-maybe-thousands/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [But I still has enough longing for that concept that I didn't want to dispel it completely. Meaning: I didn't want to tell Lily…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/but-i-still-has-enough-longing-for-that-concept-that-i-didn-t-want-to/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“When you break someone's heart, you also break yours.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/when-you-break-someone-s-heart-you-also-break-yours/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“Because toward the end all the words started leaving. Except for the ones that had to lock up at the end of the night.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/because-toward-the-end-all-the-words-started-leaving-except-for-the/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“ misgivings , n . Last night, I got up the courage to ask you if you regretted us. "There are things I miss,"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/misgivings-n-last-night-i-got-up-the-courage-to-ask-you-if-you/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) > [“Saving others is always more important than saving yourself. It has to be, or none of us would do any good.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/saving-others-is-always-more-important-than-saving-yourself-it-has-to/) [David Levithan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) [Explore all 1,648 David Levithan quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/) ## More Kindness quotes > [Half the misery of human life might be extinguished if men would alleviate the general curse they lie under by mutual offices of compassion,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-addison/half-the-misery-of-human-life-might-be-extinguished-if-men-would/) [Joseph Addison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-addison/) > [Each of our acts makes a statement as to our purpose.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-buscaglia/each-of-our-acts-makes-a-statement-as-to-our-purpose/) [Leo Buscaglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-buscaglia/) > [“I fight with love and kindness as my weapons and compassion as my defense.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debasish-mridha/i-fight-with-love-and-kindness-as-my-weapons-and-compassion-as-my/) [Debasish Mridha](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debasish-mridha/) > [Liesel observed the strangeness of her foster father's eyes. They were made of kindness, and silver.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/markus-zusak/liesel-observed-the-strangeness-of-her-foster-father-s-eyes-they-were/) [Markus Zusak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/markus-zusak/) > [Kindness unlocks doors that were thought to be closed forever.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/unkown/kindness-unlocks-doors-that-were-thought-to-be-closed-forever/) [Unkown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/unkown/) > [“You are very kind and very intelligent and those elements are not always found together. Mrs. Eleanor Roosevelt, Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune, and my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/you-are-very-kind-and-very-intelligent-and-those-elements-are-not/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [Grace is the wonderful spirit that imbues every fiber of our being when we practice the fruits of the spirit: kindness, patience, understanding, forgiveness,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-cayce/grace-is-the-wonderful-spirit-that-imbues-every-fiber-of-our-being/) [Edgar Cayce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-cayce/) > [Praise will come to those whose kindness leaves you without debt.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-finn/praise-will-come-to-those-whose-kindness-leaves-you-without-debt/) [Neil Finn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-finn/) > [“A little bit of kindness goes a long way with women.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barry-unsworth/a-little-bit-of-kindness-goes-a-long-way-with-women/) [Barry Unsworth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barry-unsworth/) > [The smartest people are the ones who can bring a little bit of heaven to earth by using there kindness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/isiahnunn/the-smartest-people-are-the-ones-who-can-bring-a-little-bit-of-heaven/) [IsiahNunn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/isiahnunn/) > [If you take all the food aid, America is by far the most generous country. If you take the direct aid, we're very generous.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/if-you-take-all-the-food-aid-america-is-by-far-the-most-generous/) [George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/) > [“No one has any right to tell you that the way you perceive yourself is wrong. Because by doing so, they also discourage the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kamand-kojouri/no-one-has-any-right-to-tell-you-that-the-way-you-perceive-yourself/) [Kamand Kojouri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kamand-kojouri/) > [“la ilaha ilallah muhammadun rasulullah, alaihi salatullah wa alihi wal ahibba "shine your mercy like the sun, and be gracious as the earth let…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/talib-al-habib/la-ilaha-ilallah-muhammadun-rasulullah-alaihi-salatullah-wa-alihi-wal/) [Talib al Habib](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/talib-al-habib/) > [“A man full of warm, speculative benevolence may wish his society otherwise constituted than he finds it; but a good patriot, and a true…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edmund-burke/a-man-full-of-warm-speculative-benevolence-may-wish-his-society/) [Edmund Burke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edmund-burke/) > [(I)f we are going to be kind, let it be out of simple generosity, not because we fear guilt or retribution.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-f-we-are-going-to-be-kind-let-it-be-out-of-simple-generosity-not/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) [Browse all 6,600 Kindness quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/kindness/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to who you want to be.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "David Levithan" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-niceness-connects-to-who-you/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Kindness" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-niceness-connects-to-who-you/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ae/david-levithan-67_kindness_kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-n_1048945.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Kindness connects to who you are, while niceness connects to who you want to be.” — David Levithan", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "David Levithan", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-levithan/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Kindness connects to who you are,...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-niceness-connects-to-who-you/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan/kindness-connects-to-who-you-are-while-niceness-connects-to-who-you/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```