---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't…"
description: "\"To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be forgiven. But we can only believe this is possible if we ourselves can forgive.\" — Dag Hammars..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png"
---

#  To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be…

![“To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be forgiven. But we can only believe this is possible if we ourselves can forgive.” quote by Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png)

> “To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be forgiven. But we can only believe this is possible if we ourselves can forgive.”

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Self‑forgiveness is insufficient; true healing requires being forgiven by others, which depends on our capacity to forgive ourselves.

**In simple terms:** We need others to forgive us, and that starts with self‑forgiveness.

Key Takeaway

Cultivate self‑compassion to enable mutual forgiveness.

Themes

forgiveness self‑acceptance spirituality

Mood

thoughtful hopeful

Type

philosophical inspirational

When to use this quote

- counseling
- conflict resolution
- personal growth

Key Concepts

interpersonal healing inner peace

Questions to Reflect On

- Can you forgive without external validation?
- What limits forgiveness?

A Different Perspective

Forgiveness may be impossible without accountability.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work/)

## Related quotes

> [If you show me a man deliberately living an unholy and licentious life, and yet boasting that his sins are forgiven, I answer, 'He…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-c-ryle/if-you-show-me-a-man-deliberately-living-an-unholy-and-licentious/)

[J. C. Ryle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-c-ryle/)

> [Good advice is one of those injuries which a good man ought, if possible, to forgive, but at all events to forget at once.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/horace-smith/good-advice-is-one-of-those-injuries-which-a-good-man-ought-if/)

[Horace Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/horace-smith/)

> [It 's possible to forgive someone a great deal if he makes you laugh.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-llewellyn/it-s-possible-to-forgive-someone-a-great-deal-if-he-makes-you-laugh/)

[Caroline Llewellyn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-llewellyn/)

> [“You will find it possible to forgive when you realize that forgiveness is a remedy to self.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gift-gugu-mona/you-will-find-it-possible-to-forgive-when-you-realize-that/)

[Gift Gugu Mona](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gift-gugu-mona/)

> [Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/forgiveness-does-not-create-a-relationship-unless-people-speak-the/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Most people behave badly when wounded. If you can remember the wounds, it is far more possible to forgive the behavior.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/most-people-behave-badly-when-wounded-if-you-can-remember-the-wounds/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“I believe like a child that suffering will be healed and made up for, that all the humiliating absurdity of human contradictions will vanish…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fyodor-dostoevsky/i-believe-like-a-child-that-suffering-will-be-healed-and-made-up-for/)

[Fyodor Dostoevsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fyodor-dostoevsky/)

> [“It is a difficult thing―if not impossible―to forgive oneself for foolish errors, not for trampling a life or goring another with sharp horns, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richelle-e-goodrich/it-is-a-difficult-thing-if-not-impossible-to-forgive-oneself-for/)

[Richelle E. Goodrich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richelle-e-goodrich/)

> [“In order to truly forgive oneself, one must either explicitly or implicitly acknowledge that one’s behavior was wrong and accept responsibility or blame for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/desmond-tutu/in-order-to-truly-forgive-oneself-one-must-either-explicitly-or/)

[Desmond Tutu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/desmond-tutu/)

> [To understand is to forgive, even oneself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-chase/to-understand-is-to-forgive-even-oneself/)

[Alexander Chase](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-chase/)

> [“A major issue with estrangement is that it really is a two-fold forgiveness journey. It’s never just one side’s fault … so there’s an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roger-macdonald-andrew/a-major-issue-with-estrangement-is-that-it-really-is-a-two-fold/)

[Roger Macdonald Andrew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roger-macdonald-andrew/)

> [“order to truly forgive oneself, one must either explicitly or implicitly acknowledge that one’s behavior was wrong and accept responsibility or blame for such…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/desmond-tutu/order-to-truly-forgive-oneself-one-must-either-explicitly-or/)

[Desmond Tutu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/desmond-tutu/)

> [“It seems we need someone to know us as we are--with all we have done--and forgive us. We need to tell. We need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sue-miller/it-seems-we-need-someone-to-know-us-as-we-are-with-all-we-have-done-2/)

[Sue Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sue-miller/)

> [In the range of my character at any given moment, I have acted in the only way it seemed to me I could have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-truitt/in-the-range-of-my-character-at-any-given-moment-i-have-acted-in-the/)

[Anne Truitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-truitt/)

> [To forgive and to be forgiven are the two points of holy magnificence and holy modesty; round these two centres the whole doctrine of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-williams/to-forgive-and-to-be-forgiven-are-the-two-points-of-holy-magnificence/)

[Charles Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-williams/)

## More by Dag Hammarskjold

> [“Didst thou give me this inescapable loneliness so that it would be easier for me to give thee all?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/didst-thou-give-me-this-inescapable-loneliness-so-that-it-would-be/)

[Dag Hammarskjöld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Beneath the hush a whisper from long ago, promising peace of mind and a burden shared. No peace which is not peace for all,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/beneath-the-hush-a-whisper-from-long-ago-promising-peace-of-mind-and/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [For the sacrificed, in the hour of sacrifice, only one thing counts: faith-alone among enemies and skeptics. Faith, in spite of the humiliation which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/for-the-sacrificed-in-the-hour-of-sacrifice-only-one-thing-counts/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Friendship needs no words.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/friendship-needs-no-words/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [If even dying is to be made a social function, then, grant me the favor of sneaking out on tiptoe without disturbing the party.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/if-even-dying-is-to-be-made-a-social-function-then-grant-me-the-favor/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Your position never gives you the right to command. It only imposes on you the duty of so living your life that others can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/your-position-never-gives-you-the-right-to-command-it-only-imposes-on/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [I have only my own burden to bear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/i-have-only-my-own-burden-to-bear/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Life yields only to the conqueror. Never accept whatcan be gained by giving in. You will be living off stolen goods, and your muscles…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/life-yields-only-to-the-conqueror-never-accept-whatcan-be-gained-by/)

[Dag Hammarskjöld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [I never discuss discussions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/i-never-discuss-discussions/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [We all have within us a center of stillness surrounded by silence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/we-all-have-within-us-a-center-of-stillness-surrounded-by-silence/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [There is a point at which everything becomes simple and there is no longer any question of choice, because all you have staked will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/there-is-a-point-at-which-everything-becomes-simple-and-there-is-no/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [God does not die on the day when we cease to believe in a personal deity, but we die on the day when our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/god-does-not-die-on-the-day-when-we-cease-to-believe-in-a-personal/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [The concept of loyalty is distorted when it is understood to mean blind acceptance. It is correctly interpreted when it is assumed to cover…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/the-concept-of-loyalty-is-distorted-when-it-is-understood-to-mean/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Those who invoke history will certainly be heard by history. And they will have to accept its verdict.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/those-who-invoke-history-will-certainly-be-heard-by-history-and-they/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

> [Your body must become familiar with its death - in all its possible forms and degrees - as a self-evident, imminent, and emotionally neutral…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/your-body-must-become-familiar-with-its-death-in-all-its-possible/)

[Dag Hammarskjold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

[Explore all 155 Dag Hammarskjold quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/)

## More Believe quotes

> [I actually think acting is a form of self-hypnosis. You have to be hyper, hyper aware of what's going on around you. You have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julianne-moore/i-actually-think-acting-is-a-form-of-self-hypnosis-you-have-to-be/)

[Julianne Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julianne-moore/)

> [Some people still believe you should just fall in line with what's going on - and that's scary. It makes a mockery of freedom…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-robison/some-people-still-believe-you-should-just-fall-in-line-with-what-s/)

[Emily Robison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-robison/)

> [The truth seems to be that propaganda on its own cannot force its way into unwilling minds; neither can it inculcate something wholly new;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-hoffer/the-truth-seems-to-be-that-propaganda-on-its-own-cannot-force-its-way/)

[Eric Hoffer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-hoffer/)

> [Resist discouragement by speaking His Word over your future. Keep standing. Keep hoping; keep believing because He is working behind the scenes. He's going…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/resist-discouragement-by-speaking-his-word-over-your-future-keep/)

[Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/)

> [I can't believe that I'm sitting in meetings with Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks, and Annette Bening. I want to take on that responsibility to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roger-ross-williams/i-can-t-believe-that-i-m-sitting-in-meetings-with-steven-spielberg/)

[Roger Ross Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roger-ross-williams/)

> [There is no such word as item girl in the dictionary. People have created this word and I don't believe that I am an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shefali-zariwala/there-is-no-such-word-as-item-girl-in-the-dictionary-people-have/)

[Shefali Zariwala](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shefali-zariwala/)

> [I understand that it's the music that keeps me alive... That's my lifeblood. And to give that up for, like, the TV, the cars,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bruce-springsteen/i-understand-that-it-s-the-music-that-keeps-me-alive-that-s-my/)

[Bruce Springsteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bruce-springsteen/)

> [I don't really like too much credit. I know nobody's going to believe this, but I'd rather be able to score goals and nobody…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bradley-wright-phillips/i-don-t-really-like-too-much-credit-i-know-nobody-s-going-to-believe/)

[Bradley Wright-Phillips](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bradley-wright-phillips/)

> [“What I have a problem with is not so much religion or god, but faith. When you say you believe something in your heart…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/penn-jillette/what-i-have-a-problem-with-is-not-so-much-religion-or-god-but-faith/)

[Penn Jillette](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/penn-jillette/)

> [Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-leno/bush-reiterated-his-stand-to-conservatives-opposing-his-decision-on/)

[Jay Leno](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-leno/)

> [Never underestimate the power of the human mind to believe what it wants to believe, no matter the conflicting evidence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-herbert/never-underestimate-the-power-of-the-human-mind-to-believe-what-it/)

[Brian Herbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-herbert/)

> [To believe in love, to be ready to give up anything for it, to be willing to risk your life for it, is the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leonardo-dicaprio/to-believe-in-love-to-be-ready-to-give-up-anything-for-it-to-be/)

[Leonardo DiCaprio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leonardo-dicaprio/)

> [That's why I don't generally talk about endorsements because I don't believe we have to tell people who to vote for.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-luther-king-iii/that-s-why-i-don-t-generally-talk-about-endorsements-because-i-don-t/)

[Martin Luther King III](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-luther-king-iii/)

> [Mankind have been slow to believe that order reigns in the universe-that the world is a cosmos and a chaos.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-a-garfield/mankind-have-been-slow-to-believe-that-order-reigns-in-the-universe/)

[James A. Garfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-a-garfield/)

> [We instantly believe everything we think. Isn't that insane? It's good for us to explore the depravity of our minds, so we know we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/krishna-das/we-instantly-believe-everything-we-think-isn-t-that-insane-it-s-good/)

[Krishna Das](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/krishna-das/)

Browse all 47,704 Believe quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be forgiven. But we can only believe this is possible if we ourselves can forgive.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Dag Hammarskjold"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work-we-have-to-be-forgiven-but-we/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Believe"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work-we-have-to-be-forgiven-but-we/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26d/dag-hammarskj-ld-2606_believe_to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work_1578146.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't work: we have to be forgiven. But we can only believe this is possible…” — Dag Hammarskjold",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Dag Hammarskjold",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dag-hammarskj-ld/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "To forgive oneself? No, that doesn't...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work-we-have-to-be-forgiven-but-we/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dag-hammarskj-ld/to-forgive-oneself-no-that-doesn-t-work-we-have-to-be-forgiven-but-we/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
