--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: And this is how I know that it's all just…" description: "\"And this is how I know that it's all just words, words, words - that fundamentally, they make no difference... Our relationship, for as long as things ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82f/curtis-sittenfeld-1731_argument_and-this-is-how-i-know-that-it-s-all-jus_3076784.png" --- # And this is how I know that it's all just words, words… ![“And this is how I know that it's all just words, words, words - that fundamentally, they make no difference... Our relationship, for as long as things were good, and in that moment when they could have been good again, was about the irrelevance of words. You feel what you feel, you act as you act…” quote by Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82f/curtis-sittenfeld-1731_argument_and-this-is-how-i-know-that-it-s-all-jus_3076784.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82f/curtis-sittenfeld-1731_argument_and-this-is-how-i-know-that-it-s-all-jus_3076784.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82f/curtis-sittenfeld-1731_argument_and-this-is-how-i-know-that-it-s-all-jus_3076784.png) > “And this is how I know that it's all just words, words, words - that fundamentally, they make no difference... Our relationship, for as long as things were good, and in that moment when they could have been good again, was about the irrelevance of words. You feel what you feel, you act as you act, who in the history of the world has ever been convinced by a well-reasoned argument?” [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Words often fail to change deep emotions; actions speak louder than arguments. **In simple terms:** Words can be empty. Key Takeaway Prioritize actions over rhetoric. Themes communication authenticity emotion Mood contemplative melancholic Type literary inspirational When to use this quote - relationships - political discourse - personal growth Key Concepts literature psychology human behavior Questions to Reflect On - When do words matter most? - How can you align words with actions? A Different Perspective Relying solely on action may ignore nuance of dialogue. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Argument](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/argument/) [Differences](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/differences/) [Irrelevance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/irrelevance/) [Language](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/language/) [Moments](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/moments/) [Our relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/our-relationship/) [World](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/) [World history](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world-history/) ## Related quotes > [I enjoy a good reasoned argument. I love the power of logic.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/luke-roberts/i-enjoy-a-good-reasoned-argument-i-love-the-power-of-logic/) [Luke Roberts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/luke-roberts/) > [Disagreements between incompatible beliefs cannot be settled by reasoned argument because reasoned argument is drummed out of those trained in religion from the cradle.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-dawkins/disagreements-between-incompatible-beliefs-cannot-be-settled-by/) [Richard Dawkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-dawkins/) > [“In modern life outside of the academy, however, arguments and debates have no external review. Facts come and go as people find convenient at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-m-nichols/in-modern-life-outside-of-the-academy-however-arguments-and-debates/) [Thomas M. Nichols](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-m-nichols/) > [A delusion that encourages belief where there is no evidence is asking for trouble. Disagreements between incompatible beliefs cannot be settled by reasoned argument…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-dawkins/a-delusion-that-encourages-belief-where-there-is-no-evidence-is/) [Richard Dawkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-dawkins/) > [Trump will not respond to reasoned argument. He will not be held accountable for the things he said. All you can do is point…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/trump-will-not-respond-to-reasoned-argument-he-will-not-be-held/) [Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/) > [I will have this done, so I order it done; let my will replace reasoned judgement.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/juvenal/i-will-have-this-done-so-i-order-it-done-let-my-will-replace-reasoned/) [Juvenal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/juvenal/) > [“Galinda didn't see the verdant world through the glass of the carriage; she saw her own reflection instead. She had the nearsightedness of youth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-maguire/galinda-didn-t-see-the-verdant-world-through-the-glass-of-the/) [Gregory Maguire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-maguire/) > [“She had reasoned that cooking them would make them safe.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-grant/she-had-reasoned-that-cooking-them-would-make-them-safe/) [Michael Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-grant/) > [“You don't grow up, she reasoned now, until you begin to evaluate yourself, to recognize your good traits and acknowledge that you have a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maud-hart-lovelace/you-don-t-grow-up-she-reasoned-now-until-you-begin-to-evaluate/) [Maud Hart Lovelace](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maud-hart-lovelace/) > [“The art of reasoned persuasion is an iterative, recursive heuristic, meaning that we must go back and forth between the facts and the rules…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-p-trachtman/the-art-of-reasoned-persuasion-is-an-iterative-recursive-heuristic/) [Joel P. Trachtman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-p-trachtman/) > [You can't reason someone out of something that they weren't reasoned into in the first place.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/you-can-t-reason-someone-out-of-something-that-they-weren-t-reasoned/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [“If a reasoned creator set the stars in their place then we must be capable of understanding them - we must also be creatures…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-perry/if-a-reasoned-creator-set-the-stars-in-their-place-then-we-must-be/) [Sarah Perry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-perry/) > [Irrationally held truths may be more harmful than reasoned errors.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-huxley/irrationally-held-truths-may-be-more-harmful-than-reasoned-errors/) [Thomas Huxley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-huxley/) > [You cannot reason a person out of something they were not reasoned into.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-swift/you-cannot-reason-a-person-out-of-something-they-were-not-reasoned/) [Jonathan Swift](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-swift/) > [“For I had felt too much and reasoned too little, hearing what I was ready to hear, not what had been said. There”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-renault/for-i-had-felt-too-much-and-reasoned-too-little-hearing-what-i-was/) [Mary Renault](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-renault/) ## More by Curtis Sittenfeld > [The best part of being a writer for me is immersing myself in a fictional world, which is the opposite of being on social…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/the-best-part-of-being-a-writer-for-me-is-immersing-myself-in-a/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“I think adults forget just how much faith teenagers can have in them, just how willing to believe that adults, by virtue of being…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/i-think-adults-forget-just-how-much-faith-teenagers-can-have-in-them/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“She came down to my dorm that night, knocking on the door around nine o'clock. Martha was at the library, and I was eating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/she-came-down-to-my-dorm-that-night-knocking-on-the-door-around-nine/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [My boarding school experience was the only thing I had strong enough feelings to write about for hundreds and hundreds of pages. I can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/my-boarding-school-experience-was-the-only-thing-i-had-strong-enough/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [Of course a magazine is usually more interesting than a conversation, because so much more time and preparation has gone into it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/of-course-a-magazine-is-usually-more-interesting-than-a-conversation/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [I feel that Pride and Prejudice is an incredibly well constructed novel on every level. The dialogue is great. The character development is great.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/i-feel-that-pride-and-prejudice-is-an-incredibly-well-constructed/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [I should probably be careful admitting this, but sometimes, when my characters are having a disagreement, it's a disagreement I'm having with myself. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/i-should-probably-be-careful-admitting-this-but-sometimes-when-my/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“Approaching each other, him from the gym, me from the library- this was when I walked down the aisle and he was waiting, this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/approaching-each-other-him-from-the-gym-me-from-the-library-this-was/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [After I’d told her – the mall, the taxi, Cross stroking my hair – she said, ‘Did he kiss you?’ ‘John and Martin totally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/after-i-d-told-her-the-mall-the-taxi-cross-stroking-my-hair-she-said/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [There's an ongoing 'water, water everywhere, and not a drop to drink' situation at my house in terms of both pens and paper.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/there-s-an-ongoing-water-water-everywhere-and-not-a-drop-to-drink/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [She opened her mouth but did not immediately speak, and I felt, simultaneously, the impulse to coax the words from her and the impulse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/she-opened-her-mouth-but-did-not-immediately-speak-and-i-felt/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“But the truth was that I didn't want to stay in Riley. The pulls of familial love and obligation could not, for the moment,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/but-the-truth-was-that-i-didn-t-want-to-stay-in-riley-the-pulls-of/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“Profii de aici le-au vazut pe toate. Noi ne percepem ca individualitati distincte, dar in ochii lor nu suntem decat o masa de nevoi…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/profii-de-aici-le-au-vazut-pe-toate-noi-ne-percepem-ca/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [When I was writing my first two books I was also freelancing and teaching and doing other odd jobs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/when-i-was-writing-my-first-two-books-i-was-also-freelancing-and/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) > [“When I think of Henry and Oliver and Mike, I feel as if they are three different models - templates, almost - and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/when-i-think-of-henry-and-oliver-and-mike-i-feel-as-if-they-are-three/) [Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) [Explore all 212 Curtis Sittenfeld quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/) ## More Argument quotes > [A flourishing, morally credible media is a vital component in the maintenance of genuinely public talk, argument about common good.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rowan-williams/a-flourishing-morally-credible-media-is-a-vital-component-in-the/) [Rowan Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rowan-williams/) > [Preaching to the choir actually arms the choir with arguments and elevates the choir's discourse. 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They consist of a kind of magic aura which the mind builds around cherished belief. Arguments which penetrate into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-koestler/the-inner-defenses-are-unconscious-they-consist-of-a-kind-of-magic/) [Arthur Koestler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-koestler/) > [On the stage, the characters express themselves more through words than images. So the arguments of the characters and the tension between characters -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/on-the-stage-the-characters-express-themselves-more-through-words/) [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) > [One argument goes that recessions are good for female artists because when money flies out the window, women are allowed in the house. The…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-saltz/one-argument-goes-that-recessions-are-good-for-female-artists-because/) [Jerry Saltz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-saltz/) > [All of the barriers to innovation in the energy sector are arguments for a big commitment to public investment. Only the public sector can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ted-nordhaus/all-of-the-barriers-to-innovation-in-the-energy-sector-are-arguments/) [Ted Nordhaus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ted-nordhaus/) > [“Arguments led by subjectivity are a waste of time. And, if they take place online, add to that, a waste of one’s keyboard.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/arguments-led-by-subjectivity-are-a-waste-of-time-and-if-they-take/) [Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) > [If in the middle of an argument I suddenly fall silent it does not mean you have won... 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