--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The best defenses against the terrors of…" description: "\"“The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the homely comforts of love, work, and family life, which connect us to a world that is indepen..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg" --- # The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the… ![“The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the homely comforts of love, work, and family life, which connect us to a world that is independent of our wishes yet responsive to our needs. It is through love and work, as Freud noted in a characteristically pungent remark, that we exchange…” quote by Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg) > ““The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the homely comforts of love, work, and family life, which connect us to a world that is independent of our wishes yet responsive to our needs. It is through love and work, as Freud noted in a characteristically pungent remark, that we exchange crippling emotional conflict for ordinary unhappiness. Love and work enable each of us to explore a small corner of the world and to come to accept it on its own terms. But our society tends either to devalue small comforts or else to expect too much of them. Our standards of "creative, meaningful work" are too exalted to survive disappointment. Our ideal of "true romance" puts an impossible burden on personal relationships. We demand too much of life, too little of ourselves.”” [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. We find safety and meaning in love, work, and family, which ground us amid life's uncertainties, but society often over‑idealizes these comforts, leading to disappointment. **In simple terms:** Love, work, and family give stability but are often over‑valued. Key Takeaway Cherish simple comforts without unrealistic expectations. Themes stability meaning societal pressure expectations disappointment Mood reflective thoughtful balanced Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - marriage - career choices - parenting - personal growth - managing expectations Key Concepts existential security psychological trade‑off social critique Questions to Reflect On - What simple comforts truly sustain you? - How can you balance expectations with reality? A Different Perspective Idealizing comfort can cause frustration when reality falls short. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Family life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/family-life/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Love And Work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-and-work/) [Meaningful work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/meaningful-work/) [Personal relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/personal-relationships/) [Sadness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sadness/) [True romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/true-romance/) [War](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/war/) ## Related quotes > [“We all look for strategies or techniques that will free us from the pain of relationships and the hard work good relationships demand. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-david-tripp/we-all-look-for-strategies-or-techniques-that-will-free-us-from-the/) [Paul David Tripp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-david-tripp/) > [Life's not so rocky now. It was very volatile when you're young: you've got no experience. Your sense of disappointment is far greater; your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ian-gillan/life-s-not-so-rocky-now-it-was-very-volatile-when-you-re-young-you-ve/) [Ian Gillan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ian-gillan/) > [“However, family and friends can be in a financial or emotional conflict of interest with the welfare of an incompetent patient.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edmund-d-pellegrino/however-family-and-friends-can-be-in-a-financial-or-emotional/) Edmund D. Pellegrino > [I love watching the N.Y.C. Marathon - it might even be the best day of the year. I'm already in a true romance with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-ruhle/i-love-watching-the-n-y-c-marathon-it-might-even-be-the-best-day-of/) [Stephanie Ruhle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-ruhle/) > [I love Elmore Leonard. To me, True Romance is basically like an Elmore Leonard movie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/quentin-tarantino/i-love-elmore-leonard-to-me-true-romance-is-basically-like-an-elmore/) [Quentin Tarantino](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/quentin-tarantino/) > [I have done love stories; they've just been in my other movies. True Romance's title was not ironic. Sure, James Gandolfini almost beats Patricia…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/quentin-tarantino/i-have-done-love-stories-they-ve-just-been-in-my-other-movies-true/) [Quentin Tarantino](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/quentin-tarantino/) > [“Romance meant more to me now. More than laughter and longing. I couldn’t explain it. Romance, true romance, killed my childish dreams and replaced…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marilyn-grey/romance-meant-more-to-me-now-more-than-laughter-and-longing-i-couldn/) [Marilyn Grey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marilyn-grey/) > [For me, romance is only 'true' when there are two sides to it. I think to have true romance you have to have the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charli-xcx/for-me-romance-is-only-true-when-there-are-two-sides-to-it-i-think-to/) [Charli XCX](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charli-xcx/) > [True romance isn't romeo and Juliet who died together. But grandma and grandpa who grew old together](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/true-romance-isn-t-romeo-and-juliet-who-died-together-but-grandma-and/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The life of man is the true romance, which when it is valiantly conduced, will yield the imagination a higher joy than any fiction.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ralph-waldo-emerson/the-life-of-man-is-the-true-romance-which-when-it-is-valiantly/) [Ralph Waldo Emerson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ralph-waldo-emerson/) > [“A true romance is not something that happens between the skins. It is something that burns our souls beautifully and leaves us craving to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/akshay-vasu/a-true-romance-is-not-something-that-happens-between-the-skins-it-is/) [Akshay Vasu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/akshay-vasu/) > [Now, my mom did not read well and she read 'True Romance' magazines, but she read with me. And she would spend 30 minutes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walter-dean-myers/now-my-mom-did-not-read-well-and-she-read-true-romance-magazines-but/) [Walter Dean Myers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walter-dean-myers/) > [Films like 'True Romance' and 'The Last Boy Scout' stuck with me since I saw them when I was young, on every different format.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gareth-evans/films-like-true-romance-and-the-last-boy-scout-stuck-with-me-since-i/) [Gareth Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gareth-evans/) > [Is it weird that I think of myself as a 'Gary Oldman in True Romance' type?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonah-hill/is-it-weird-that-i-think-of-myself-as-a-gary-oldman-in-true-romance/) [Jonah Hill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonah-hill/) > [No, I was never that kind of guy. I believed in true romance; one-night stands are always going to leave you feeling cold and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/channing-tatum/no-i-was-never-that-kind-of-guy-i-believed-in-true-romance-one-night/) [Channing Tatum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/channing-tatum/) ## More by Christopher Lasch > [The news appeals to the same jaded appetite that makes a child tire of a toy as soon as it becomes familiar and demand…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-news-appeals-to-the-same-jaded-appetite-that-makes-a-child-tire/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Most women are pragmatists who have allowed extremists on the left and right to manipulate the family issue for their own purposes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/most-women-are-pragmatists-who-have-allowed-extremists-on-the-left/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [“Members of the educated elite upheld open-mindedness as the supreme political virtue but refused to debate their own idea of the good life, perhaps…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/members-of-the-educated-elite-upheld-open-mindedness-as-the-supreme/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Neoclassical economics insists that advertising cannot force consumers to buy anything they don't already want to buy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/neoclassical-economics-insists-that-advertising-cannot-force/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [It is the logic of consumerism that undermines the values of loyalty and permanence and promotes a different set of values that is destructive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/it-is-the-logic-of-consumerism-that-undermines-the-values-of-loyalty/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [It is a tribute to the peculiar horror of contemporary life that it makes the worst features of earlier times -- the stupefaction of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/it-is-a-tribute-to-the-peculiar-horror-of-contemporary-life-that-it/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Relentless improvement of the product and upgrading of consumer tastes are the heart of mass merchandising.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/relentless-improvement-of-the-product-and-upgrading-of-consumer/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [The model of ownership, in a society organized round mass consumption, is addiction.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-model-of-ownership-in-a-society-organized-round-mass-consumption/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [We demand too much of life, too little of ourselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/we-demand-too-much-of-life-too-little-of-ourselves/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [We live in a historical period characterized by a sharp discrepancy between the intellectual development of man... and his mental-emotional development, which has left…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/we-live-in-a-historical-period-characterized-by-a-sharp-discrepancy/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [The intellectual debility of contemporary conservatism is indicated by its silence on all important matters.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-intellectual-debility-of-contemporary-conservatism-is-indicated/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Ostensibly rigorous and realistic, contemporary conservatism is an ideology of denial. Its symbol is a smile button.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/ostensibly-rigorous-and-realistic-contemporary-conservatism-is-an/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Adherents of the new religious right reject the separation of politics and religion, but they bring no spiritual insights to politics.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/adherents-of-the-new-religious-right-reject-the-separation-of/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Today Americans are overcome not by the sense of endless possibility but by the banality of the social order they have erected against it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/today-americans-are-overcome-not-by-the-sense-of-endless-possibility/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) > [Propaganda in the ordinary sense of the term plays a less important part in a consumer society, where people greet all official pronouncements with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/propaganda-in-the-ordinary-sense-of-the-term-plays-a-less-important/) [Christopher Lasch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) [Explore all 82 Christopher Lasch quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/) ## More Family life quotes > [I mean family is more important than anything in life. Family is important than my crew, D-Block, my rap career anything... It's the most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/styles-p/i-mean-family-is-more-important-than-anything-in-life-family-is/) [Styles P](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/styles-p/) > [“For within the very structure of family life, in families that do or did embrace the male religions, are the almost invisibly accepted social…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/merlin-stone/for-within-the-very-structure-of-family-life-in-families-that-do-or/) [Merlin Stone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/merlin-stone/) > [Family is life; acting is making a living.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/denzel-washington/family-is-life-acting-is-making-a-living/) [Denzel Washington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/denzel-washington/) > [In Roslyn, Pennsylvania, we started our real-life family circus. They provided the inspiration for my cartoons. I provided the perspiration.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bil-keane/in-roslyn-pennsylvania-we-started-our-real-life-family-circus-they/) [Bil Keane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bil-keane/) > [Obviously, your family life is the priority, but there's still other stuff you have to get done in a day. I think the way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cindy-crawford/obviously-your-family-life-is-the-priority-but-there-s-still-other/) [Cindy Crawford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cindy-crawford/) > [My father was in real estate, banking, and land management. As family life, it was very conventional, happy, and comfortable. We weren't wealthy, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-child/my-father-was-in-real-estate-banking-and-land-management-as-family/) [Julia Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-child/) > [“Generally speaking, most of our vital, spontaneous, instinctual life gets shamed. Children are shamed for being too rambunctious, for wanting things and for laughing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-bradshaw/generally-speaking-most-of-our-vital-spontaneous-instinctual-life/) [John Bradshaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-bradshaw/) > [Once you run for office, you're in it - sort of like going into the military. You'd better be damned sure it is what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-f-kennedy-jr/once-you-run-for-office-you-re-in-it-sort-of-like-going-into-the/) [John F. Kennedy Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-f-kennedy-jr/) > [The moment you realize your stuck with your crazy family for life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sinahi-martinez/the-moment-you-realize-your-stuck-with-your-crazy-family-for-life/) [Sinahi Martinez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sinahi-martinez/) > [“Sarah drew a deep breath and released it slowly, waiting for her voice to steady before she spoke. “It’s a ve ry good story.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bonnie-dee/sarah-drew-a-deep-breath-and-released-it-slowly-waiting-for-her-voice/) [Bonnie Dee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bonnie-dee/) > [My family life reads a bit like 'Little House on the Prairie.' I was big sister to Joan, Renee, and brother William, and we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maeve-binchy/my-family-life-reads-a-bit-like-little-house-on-the-prairie-i-was-big/) [Maeve Binchy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maeve-binchy/) > [“Love transcends all barriers. Age, Gender, Caste et al are the diktats of society to thwart love, promote strait jacketed family life . .…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jayant-swamy/love-transcends-all-barriers-age-gender-caste-et-al-are-the-diktats/) [Jayant Swamy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jayant-swamy/) > [ If \[people\] place such things as friendship and family ties above their own productive work, yes, then they are immoral. Friendship, family life and… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayn-rand/if-people-place-such-things-as-friendship-and-family-ties-above-their/) [Ayn Rand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayn-rand/) > [“The worst part of it has been, I think, the adverse effect on family life. It kills off family conversation. And it’s harder to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-wayne/the-worst-part-of-it-has-been-i-think-the-adverse-effect-on-family/) [John Wayne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-wayne/) > [“To live the same family life as his father and forefathers—that is, in the same condition of culture—and to bring up his children in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anton-chekhov/to-live-the-same-family-life-as-his-father-and-forefathers-that-is-in/) [Anton Chekhov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anton-chekhov/) [Browse all 670 Family life quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/family-life/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the homely comforts of love, work, and family life, which connect us to a world that is independent of our wishes yet responsive to our needs. It is through love and work, as Freud noted in a characteristically pungent remark, that we exchange crippling emotional conflict for ordinary unhappiness. Love and work enable each of us to explore a small corner of the world and to come to accept it on its own terms. But our society tends either to devalue small comforts or else to expect too much of them. Our standards of \"creative, meaningful work\" are too exalted to survive disappointment. Our ideal of \"true romance\" puts an impossible burden on personal relationships. We demand too much of life, too little of ourselves.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Christopher Lasch" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of-existence-are-the-homely/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Family life" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of-existence-are-the-homely/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edd/christopher-lasch-8262_family-life_the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of_1800781.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The best defenses against the terrors of existence are the homely comforts of love, work, and family life…” — Christopher Lasch", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Christopher Lasch", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-lasch/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“The best defenses against the terrors...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of-existence-are-the-homely/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-lasch/the-best-defenses-against-the-terrors-of-existence-are-the-homely/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```