--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We did not learn how to feel or…" description: "\"“We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how to appreciate our own strengths, how to value or respect or understand the packages we came..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg" --- # We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how… ![“We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how to appreciate our own strengths, how to value or respect or understand the packages we came in. Instead, we learned how to look at them, to pair sexuality with desirability, to measure the worth of our bodies by their capacity to elicit…” quote by Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg) > ““We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how to appreciate our own strengths, how to value or respect or understand the packages we came in. Instead, we learned how to look at them, to pair sexuality with desirability, to measure the worth of our bodies by their capacity to elicit admiration from others.”” [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. We are taught to view bodies as objects of desire and validation rather than sources of feeling and self‑respect. **In simple terms:** Bodies are judged by others, not felt by ourselves. Key Takeaway Cultivate body awareness beyond external approval. Themes self‑esteem body image societal pressure Mood reflective empathetic Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - therapy - personal growth - media literacy - relationship building Key Concepts objectification self‑knowledge Questions to Reflect On - How can you reconnect with your body’s sensations? - What practices help you value yourself beyond others’ admiration? A Different Perspective Overemphasis on external validation can ignore internal health needs. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Appreciate Strengths](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/appreciate-strengths-4176052/) [Beauty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/beauty/) [Bodies Appreciate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bodies-appreciate-5113657/) [Body](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/body/) [Experience Bodies](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/experience-bodies-1313890/) [Learn Feel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/learn-feel-371253/) [Respect](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/respect/) [Sexuality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sexuality/) [Sexuality Desirability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sexuality-desirability-5113658/) [Women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/women/) ## Related quotes > [Here in America, we don't let our differences tear us apart. Not here. Because we know that our greatness comes from when we appreciate…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-obama/here-in-america-we-don-t-let-our-differences-tear-us-apart-not-here/) [Michelle Obama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-obama/) > [Sexuality, desirability has nothing to do with body type. It has to do with how you feel from within. I was at my fattest…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vidya-balan/sexuality-desirability-has-nothing-to-do-with-body-type-it-has-to-do/) [Vidya Balan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vidya-balan/) > [My consuming lust was to experience their bodies. I viewed them as objects, as strangers. It is hard for me to believe a human…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-dahmer/my-consuming-lust-was-to-experience-their-bodies-i-viewed-them-as/) [Jeffrey Dahmer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-dahmer/) > [“We are experiencing changes across the full spectrum of our experience: to our bodies, our diet, our sleep, and so much more. many of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/heather-e-heying/we-are-experiencing-changes-across-the-full-spectrum-of-our/) [Heather E. Heying](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/heather-e-heying/) > [“We are not human beings having a human experience. Our bodies are temporary. We are souls. We are immortal; we are eternal. We never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/we-are-not-human-beings-having-a-human-experience-our-bodies-are/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [How we see and hold the full range of our experiences in our minds and in our hearts makes an enormous difference in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-kabat-zinn/how-we-see-and-hold-the-full-range-of-our-experiences-in-our-minds/) [Jon Kabat-Zinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-kabat-zinn/) > [I think listening to real classic soul material made me learn how to feel music that's sung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gavin-degraw/i-think-listening-to-real-classic-soul-material-made-me-learn-how-to/) [Gavin DeGraw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gavin-degraw/) > [Love isn't something you learn it's something you feel...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/love-isn-t-something-you-learn-it-s-something-you-feel/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I'm still young and everyday I want to learn more. I feel I am beginning to find myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thierry-henry/i-m-still-young-and-everyday-i-want-to-learn-more-i-feel-i-am/) [Thierry Henry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thierry-henry/) > [Observe, record, tabulate, communicate. Use your five senses. Learn to see, learn to hear, learn to feel, learn to smell, and know that by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-osler/observe-record-tabulate-communicate-use-your-five-senses-learn-to-see/) [William Osler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-osler/) > [Every experience you have is an opportunity to see yourself in a new way and if you close your mind and say you didn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/every-experience-you-have-is-an-opportunity-to-see-yourself-in-a-new/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [To learn, sometimes you have to feel the fool.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/to-learn-sometimes-you-have-to-feel-the-fool/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I've learned it as I've gotten older, but just really enjoy your own company. Especially as a woman, that's something that's really empowering and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andi-dorfman/i-ve-learned-it-as-i-ve-gotten-older-but-just-really-enjoy-your-own/) [Andi Dorfman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andi-dorfman/) > [I look at it somewhat as a way - when you learn juggling, what you learn is how to feel with your eyes and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-moschen/i-look-at-it-somewhat-as-a-way-when-you-learn-juggling-what-you-learn/) [Michael Moschen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-moschen/) > [It's astonishing what you learn and feel and see along the way. That's why a reporter's job, as you know, is such a joy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-wallace/it-s-astonishing-what-you-learn-and-feel-and-see-along-the-way-that-s/) [Mike Wallace](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-wallace/) ## More by Caroline Knapp > [I'm 38 and I'm single, and I'm having my most intense and gratifying relationship with a dog. But we all learn about love in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/i-m-38-and-i-m-single-and-i-m-having-my-most-intense-and-gratifying/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [The kinds of roles dogs fill can be hard to come by in human relationships. We touch the dog or the pet at whim.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/the-kinds-of-roles-dogs-fill-can-be-hard-to-come-by-in-human/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [It happened this way: I fell in love and then, because the love was ruining everything I cared about, I had to fall out.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/it-happened-this-way-i-fell-in-love-and-then-because-the-love-was/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Was he smart enough? Introspective enough? Was it just enough to love him, or should I attach myself to someone who seemed farther ahead…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/was-he-smart-enough-introspective-enough-was-it-just-enough-to-love/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Who has the best features? This was a little game, conducted several times and always with the same results, in seventh grade, the time…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/who-has-the-best-features-this-was-a-little-game-conducted-several/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [“Life had this unmoored quality, full of voids and barely acknowledged yearnings, and if I'd made a list of things I wanted desperately at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/life-had-this-unmoored-quality-full-of-voids-and-barely-acknowledged/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [The hard things in life, the things you really learn from, happen with a clear mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/the-hard-things-in-life-the-things-you-really-learn-from-happen-with/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [When you're starving or wrapped up in a cycle of binge-ing-and-purging, or sexually obsessed with (someone), it is very hard to think about anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/when-you-re-starving-or-wrapped-up-in-a-cycle-of-binge-ing-and/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Dogs are fantasies that don't disappoint.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/dogs-are-fantasies-that-don-t-disappoint/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [The clothes are different: pre-dog, I used to be very finicky and self-conscious about how I looked; now I schlep around in the worst…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/the-clothes-are-different-pre-dog-i-used-to-be-very-finicky-and-self/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Dogs have such short life spans, it's like a concentrated version of a human life. When they get older, they become much more like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/dogs-have-such-short-life-spans-it-s-like-a-concentrated-version-of-a/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Anorexia is a response to cultural images of the female body - waiflike, angular - that both capitulates to the ideal and also mocks…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/anorexia-is-a-response-to-cultural-images-of-the-female-body-waiflike/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [By definition, memoir demands a certain degree of introspection and self-disclosure: In order to fully engage a reader, the narrator has to make herself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/by-definition-memoir-demands-a-certain-degree-of-introspection-and/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [Academic achievement was something I'd always sought as a form of reward. Good grades pleased my parents, good grades pleased my teachers; you got…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/academic-achievement-was-something-i-d-always-sought-as-a-form-of/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) > [These are big trade-offs for a simple piece of cake - add five hundred calories, subtract well-being, allure, and self-esteem - and the feelings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/these-are-big-trade-offs-for-a-simple-piece-of-cake-add-five-hundred/) [Caroline Knapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) [Explore all 89 Caroline Knapp quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/) ## More Beauty quotes > [We do not want nowadays temples of worship and outward rites and ceremonies. What we really want is an Asram. We want a place…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rabindranath-tagore/we-do-not-want-nowadays-temples-of-worship-and-outward-rites-and/) [Rabindranath Tagore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rabindranath-tagore/) > [How could anybody confuse truth with beauty, I thought as I looked at him. Truth came with sunken eyes, bony or scarred, decayed. Its…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-fitch/how-could-anybody-confuse-truth-with-beauty-i-thought-as-i-looked-at/) [Janet Fitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-fitch/) > [A thing of beauty is a joy for ever;It's loveliness increase;it will never pass into nothingness;but still will keep a bower quiet for us,and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-keats/a-thing-of-beauty-is-a-joy-for-ever-it-s-loveliness-increase-it-will/) [John Keats](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-keats/) > [To fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity, and still be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tool/to-fathom-the-power-to-witness-the-beauty-to-bathe-in-the-fountain-to/) [Tool](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tool/) > [The term "black metal" has become a lot looser, or can include a larger range of sounds and extra-musical aesthetics, not just Satan and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-marston/the-term-black-metal-has-become-a-lot-looser-or-can-include-a-larger/) [Colin Marston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-marston/) > [“We've all met people who are beautiful on the outside, however, when they open their mouths to speak, they have nothing of substance to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-c-young/we-ve-all-met-people-who-are-beautiful-on-the-outside-however-when/) [Susan C. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-c-young/) > [There are various orders of beauty, causing men to make fools of themselves in various styles.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-eliot/there-are-various-orders-of-beauty-causing-men-to-make-fools-of/) [George Eliot](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-eliot/) > [To me, the beauty of a quilt or a dress lies within the stitches and the thought of the person who made them. When…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/natalie/to-me-the-beauty-of-a-quilt-or-a-dress-lies-within-the-stitches-and/) [Natalie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/natalie/) > [“do not misunderstand person by beauty You really do not know its real or Mask on dirty thoughts”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohammed-zaki-ansari/do-not-misunderstand-person-by-beauty-you-really-do-not-know-its-real/) [Mohammed Zaki Ansari](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohammed-zaki-ansari/) > [“I already love in you your beauty, but I am only beginning to love in you that which is eternal and ever precious –…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-tolstoy/i-already-love-in-you-your-beauty-but-i-am-only-beginning-to-love-in/) [Leo Tolstoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-tolstoy/) > [The more perfect the sight is the more delightful the beautiful object. The more perfect the appetite, the sweeter the food. The more musical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-baxter/the-more-perfect-the-sight-is-the-more-delightful-the-beautiful/) [Richard Baxter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-baxter/) > [Call her beautiful a million times and she won't believe you. Call her ugly once, and she will never forget it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tumblr/call-her-beautiful-a-million-times-and-she-won-t-believe-you-call-her/) [Tumblr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tumblr/) > [Time can but make her beauty over again.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-butler-yeats/time-can-but-make-her-beauty-over-again/) [William Butler Yeats](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-butler-yeats/) > [ The social \[media channel\] isn't about beauty contests and popularity contests. They're a distortion, a caricature of the real thing. It's about trust, connection,… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/umair-haque/the-social-media-channel-isn-t-about-beauty-contests-and-popularity/) [Umair Haque](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/umair-haque/) > [“What about you? What do you do?” I needed to ask questions, draw him out. I needed to find out all the information I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-avery-ellison/what-about-you-what-do-you-do-i-needed-to-ask-questions-draw-him-out/) [Kate Avery Ellison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-avery-ellison/) [Browse all 24,662 Beauty quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/beauty/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how to appreciate our own strengths, how to value or respect or understand the packages we came in. Instead, we learned how to look at them, to pair sexuality with desirability, to measure the worth of our bodies by their capacity to elicit admiration from others.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Caroline Knapp" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experience-our-bodies-how-to/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Beauty" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experience-our-bodies-how-to/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09f/caroline-knapp-7652_beauty_we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experien_1434129.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We did not learn how to feel or experience our bodies, how to appreciate our own strengths, how to value or…” — Caroline Knapp", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Caroline Knapp", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-knapp/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“We did not learn how to...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experience-our-bodies-how-to/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-knapp/we-did-not-learn-how-to-feel-or-experience-our-bodies-how-to/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```