--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that." description: "\"You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that.\" — Byron Katie" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png" --- # You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that. ![“You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that.” quote by Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png) > “You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that.” [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Self-inflicted pain is the only true harm; external events cannot hurt you without your consent. **In simple terms:** Only self-harm hurts you. Key Takeaway Recognize internal control over pain. Themes self-awareness psychology pain responsibility mindset Mood reflective calming Type philosophical self-help When to use this quote - mental health treatment - personal growth - conflict resolution - stress management Key Concepts cognitive therapy self-empowerment inner dialogue Questions to Reflect On - What thoughts cause you suffering? - How can you shift perception? A Different Perspective External events can cause genuine injury. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Can do](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/can-do/) [Hurt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurt/) [Hurt me](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurt-me/) [I can](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/i-can/) [Inspirational](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) ## Related quotes > [Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be cause by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That’s not a possibility.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-cause-by-another/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [No one can hurt me - that's my job.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/no-one-can-hurt-me-that-s-my-job/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [People are just afraid of things too much … Sure, evil exists, extremism exists. Somebody could commit a hate crime and hurt me. But…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-ocean/people-are-just-afraid-of-things-too-much-sure-evil-exists-extremism/) [Frank Ocean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-ocean/) > [If you want to hurt me, fine. Take my books. Burn down my house. Shave my head while I am sleeping. But nobody, nobody…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/molly-harper/if-you-want-to-hurt-me-fine-take-my-books-burn-down-my-house-shave-my/) [Molly Harper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/molly-harper/) > [I had these kind of unrealistic expectations that were fueled by romantic comedies, and it has both helped me and hurt me in many…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mindy-kaling/i-had-these-kind-of-unrealistic-expectations-that-were-fueled-by/) [Mindy Kaling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mindy-kaling/) > [Colin thought about the dork mantra: sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. What a dirty lie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/colin-thought-about-the-dork-mantra-sticks-and-stones-may-break-my/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I guess my height has hurt me as much as it's helped me. In comedy people don't mind casting tall women next to shorter…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allison-janney/i-guess-my-height-has-hurt-me-as-much-as-it-s-helped-me-in-comedy/) [Allison Janney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allison-janney/) > [I feel pain everyday of my life. When you see me perform, it's that pain you're seeing coming out. I put all my emotions,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-rollins/i-feel-pain-everyday-of-my-life-when-you-see-me-perform-it-s-that/) [Henry Rollins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-rollins/) > [All criticism hurts me. I'm so in the wrong business.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/all-criticism-hurts-me-i-m-so-in-the-wrong-business/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [You can't drop concepts. You can only shine a little flashlight on them as you do inquiry, an you see that what you thought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-can-t-drop-concepts-you-can-only-shine-a-little-flashlight-on/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [When a thought hurts, that’s the signal that it isn’t true.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/when-a-thought-hurts-that-s-the-signal-that-it-isn-t-true/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [We're not all perfect. People always say to me: "Oh you seem happy all the time." But I'm not happy all the time. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dolly-parton/we-re-not-all-perfect-people-always-say-to-me-oh-you-seem-happy-all/) [Dolly Parton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dolly-parton/) > [If people don't have their own vision, all they can do is 'sign-up' for someone else's.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-senge/if-people-don-t-have-their-own-vision-all-they-can-do-is-sign-up-for/) [Peter Senge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-senge/) > [Supposing Catherine Lim was writing about me and not the prime minister...She would not dare, right? Because my posture, my response has been such…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-kuan-yew/supposing-catherine-lim-was-writing-about-me-and-not-the-prime/) [Lee Kuan Yew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lee-kuan-yew/) > [I don't want to hurt you, Mistress Weatherwax," said Mrs Gogol. "That's good," said Granny. "I don't want you to hurt me either.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-pratchett/i-don-t-want-to-hurt-you-mistress-weatherwax-said-mrs-gogol-that-s/) [Terry Pratchett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-pratchett/) ## More by Byron Katie > [The moment it begins to question itself, the mind becomes so clear that it starts working with itself rather than with the body's identification.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/the-moment-it-begins-to-question-itself-the-mind-becomes-so-clear/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [People don't need sudden revelations. They get what they need when they need it, thought by thought by thought. It's a constant thing when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/people-don-t-need-sudden-revelations-they-get-what-they-need-when/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [Your parents are your projection-nothing more.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/your-parents-are-your-projection-nothing-more/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [When a thought hurts, that’s the signal that it isn’t true.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/when-a-thought-hurts-that-s-the-signal-that-it-isn-t-true/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [Since the past is unreal and the future is unreal, all your thoughts are about nothing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/since-the-past-is-unreal-and-the-future-is-unreal-all-your-thoughts/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [I used to sleep on the floor next to the bed, because I believed that I didn't even deserve a bed to sleep in.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/i-used-to-sleep-on-the-floor-next-to-the-bed-because-i-believed-that/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [You can never make yourself believe that you're loveable, however hard you try, because when the chips are down what you really believe rises…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-can-never-make-yourself-believe-that-you-re-loveable-however-hard/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [“Your story is your identity, and you’d do almost anything to prove that it’s true. Inquiry into self is the only thing that has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/your-story-is-your-identity-and-you-d-do-almost-anything-to-prove/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [It's not what happens in life that bothers us. It's what we're believing about it that bothers us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/it-s-not-what-happens-in-life-that-bothers-us-it-s-what-we-re/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [Love asks for nothing. Only personalities want something.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/love-asks-for-nothing-only-personalities-want-something/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [I love what I think, and I'm never tempted to believe it. Thoughts are like the wind or the leaves on the trees or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/i-love-what-i-think-and-i-m-never-tempted-to-believe-it-thoughts-are/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [Reality doesn't wait for your opinion, vote, or permission, sweetheart. It just keeps being what it is and doing what it does.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/reality-doesn-t-wait-for-your-opinion-vote-or-permission-sweetheart/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [As long as we believe our thoughts, there will always be war.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/as-long-as-we-believe-our-thoughts-there-will-always-be-war/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [“Reality doesn’t wait for our agreement or approval. It is what it is. You can count on it. Gary:”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/reality-doesn-t-wait-for-our-agreement-or-approval-it-is-what-it-is/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [You can't drop concepts. You can only shine a little flashlight on them as you do inquiry, an you see that what you thought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-can-t-drop-concepts-you-can-only-shine-a-little-flashlight-on/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) [Explore all 480 Byron Katie quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) ## More Can do quotes > [Changes before your eyes, things you can do and things you can't. My attitude is always let it keep rolling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terrence-malick/changes-before-your-eyes-things-you-can-do-and-things-you-can-t-my/) [Terrence Malick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terrence-malick/) > [The happy medium is television. And if you find a good suitor, you can do it for years. With movies, you roll the dice.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bruce-campbell/the-happy-medium-is-television-and-if-you-find-a-good-suitor-you-can/) [Bruce Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bruce-campbell/) > [If I had a million dollars, I just wouldn't just completely set back. I'd have to get out there and show my face to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/muddy-waters/if-i-had-a-million-dollars-i-just-wouldn-t-just-completely-set-back-i/) [Muddy Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/muddy-waters/) > [Anybody can be Prince Charming one day a year, with the dinner and the flowers and all that. But you know what impresses me?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryan-howard/anybody-can-be-prince-charming-one-day-a-year-with-the-dinner-and-the/) [Ryan Howard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryan-howard/) > [And if the mind thinks with a believing attitude one can do amazing things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/norman-vincent-peale/and-if-the-mind-thinks-with-a-believing-attitude-one-can-do-amazing/) [Norman Vincent Peale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/norman-vincent-peale/) > [The amount of things you can do with a kettlebell is unsurpassed by any other training equipment - dumbbells, resistance machines, free weights.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laird-hamilton/the-amount-of-things-you-can-do-with-a-kettlebell-is-unsurpassed-by/) [Laird Hamilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laird-hamilton/) > [It's nice when you've done enough movies that you can do your own anthology.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-lithgow/it-s-nice-when-you-ve-done-enough-movies-that-you-can-do-your-own/) [John Lithgow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-lithgow/) > [If people don't have their own vision, all they can do is 'sign-up' for someone else's.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-senge/if-people-don-t-have-their-own-vision-all-they-can-do-is-sign-up-for/) [Peter Senge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-senge/) > [The one thing that flies in the face of all human history and experience, is that the government can do a superior job than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-cook/the-one-thing-that-flies-in-the-face-of-all-human-history-and/) [James Cook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-cook/) > [...what I can do is offer myself, wholehearted and present, to walk with the people I love through the fear and the mess. That's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shauna-niequist/what-i-can-do-is-offer-myself-wholehearted-and-present-to-walk-with/) [Shauna Niequist](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shauna-niequist/) > [Whether that's speaking up in your job or asking for a promotion or saying, 'I think I can do that.' Using your voice in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maria-shriver/whether-that-s-speaking-up-in-your-job-or-asking-for-a-promotion-or/) [Maria Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maria-shriver/) > [The average ordinary citizen can do a lot of different things when it comes to the climate crisis.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lawrence-bender/the-average-ordinary-citizen-can-do-a-lot-of-different-things-when-it/) [Lawrence Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lawrence-bender/) > [A professional is a man who can do his job when he doesn't feel like it. An amateur is a man who can't do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-agate/a-professional-is-a-man-who-can-do-his-job-when-he-doesn-t-feel-like/) [James Agate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-agate/) > [The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, as it pleases him, for he can do all things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/homer/the-lord-gives-and-the-lord-takes-away-as-it-pleases-him-for-he-can/) [Homer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/homer/) > [I'm not an educated man. I only know what I'm told, and I'm not told that much; I have no frame of reference for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maynard-james-keenan/i-m-not-an-educated-man-i-only-know-what-i-m-told-and-i-m-not-told/) [Maynard James Keenan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maynard-james-keenan/) [Browse all 5,673 Can do quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/can-do/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Byron Katie" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Can do" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/byron-katie-553_can-do_you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that-21_2178134.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You cannot hurt me. Only I can do that.” — Byron Katie", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Byron Katie", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "You cannot hurt me. Only I...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-cannot-hurt-me-only-i-can-do-that/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```