---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind…"
description: "\"“Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That's not a possibility. It's only when I ..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg"
---

#  Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused…

![“Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That's not a possibility. It's only when I believe a stressful thought that I get hurt. And I'm the one who's hurting me by believing what I think. This is very good news, because it means…” quote by Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg)

> ““Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That's not a possibility. It's only when I believe a stressful thought that I get hurt. And I'm the one who's hurting me by believing what I think. This is very good news, because it means that I don't have to get someone else to stop hurting me. I'm the one who can stop hurting me. It's within my power. What we are doing with inquiry is meeting our thoughts with some simple understanding, finally. Pain, anger, and frustration will let us know when it's time to inquire. We either believe what we think or we question it: there's no other choice. Questioning our thoughts is the kinder way. Inquiry always leaves us as more loving human beings.””

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Emotional pain arises from our own beliefs, not external events; by questioning thoughts we can stop self‑inflicted suffering and become more loving.

**In simple terms:** Pain comes from our thoughts, not others.

Key Takeaway

Question and release harmful thoughts.

Themes

mindfulness self‑responsibility emotional health inquiry

Mood

hopeful empowering

Type

self‑help psychological

When to use this quote

- stress management
- personal growth
- conflict resolution
- mental health

Key Concepts

cognitive restructuring inner peace self‑compassion

Questions to Reflect On

- What thought is causing your current pain?
- How can you practice inquiry in daily life?

A Different Perspective

Some may find it difficult to detach from deeply held beliefs.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Anger and frustration](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger-and-frustration/) [Good news](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good-news/) [Hurt feelings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurt-feelings/) [Pain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pain/)

## Related quotes

> [Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be cause by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That’s not a possibility.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-cause-by-another/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [“...I guess when someone's really hurt you, there always seems to be a possibility for more.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lorna-landvik/i-guess-when-someone-s-really-hurt-you-there-always-seems-to-be-a/)

[Lorna Landvik](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lorna-landvik/)

> [Friends can hurt you, but the possibility of pain with lovers is so much greater because your expectations are so high. You don't ask…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ethan-hawke/friends-can-hurt-you-but-the-possibility-of-pain-with-lovers-is-so/)

[Ethan Hawke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ethan-hawke/)

> [The ones you thought would fight for you and love you morethan youll ever know, is theone yuo never thought will hurt you the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wendy/the-ones-you-thought-would-fight-for-you-and-love-you-morethan-youll/)

[Wendy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wendy/)

> [Nothing hurts more than being disappointed by the single person you thought would never hurt you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/nothing-hurts-more-than-being-disappointed-by-the-single-person-you/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“He had lost the capacity of personal suffering, or he thought he had, and could only be hurt truly by what happened to others.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ernest-hemingway/he-had-lost-the-capacity-of-personal-suffering-or-he-thought-he-had/)

[Ernest Hemingway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ernest-hemingway/)

> [If I thought I had hurt my chances of winning another major just because I was chasing money around, I'd wind up kicking myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-weir/if-i-thought-i-had-hurt-my-chances-of-winning-another-major-just/)

[Mike Weir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-weir/)

> [Nothing hurts more than being disappointed by the person whom we thought would never hurt us !!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aaron-cchan/nothing-hurts-more-than-being-disappointed-by-the-person-whom-we/)

[AaRon CcHan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aaron-cchan/)

> [I Never Thought It Could Hurt This Much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-never-thought-it-could-hurt-this-much/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [In my opinion some dudes are fragile and the thought of being hurt becomes too real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/in-my-opinion-some-dudes-are-fragile-and-the-thought-of-being-hurt/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“I lied!' I spat my whisper at him. 'I knew you read my journal. I knew you read my dreams. I wrote there what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-hobb/i-lied-i-spat-my-whisper-at-him-i-knew-you-read-my-journal-i-knew-you/)

[Robin Hobb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-hobb/)

> [Nothing hurts more than being disappointed by the person you thought would never hurt you](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hussein-nishah/nothing-hurts-more-than-being-disappointed-by-the-person-you-thought/)

[Hussein Nishah](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hussein-nishah/)

> [I never thought that I would being hurt by you](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-never-thought-that-i-would-being-hurt-by-you/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Well I think its safe to say this week has been the worst week EVER I never I never thought I could get so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/talyiah/well-i-think-its-safe-to-say-this-week-has-been-the-worst-week-ever-i/)

[Talyiah](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/talyiah/)

> [“But as I looked up at him, I saw genuine worry in his eyes. I realized he really had thought I was hurt. “Mael,”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lesley-livingston/but-as-i-looked-up-at-him-i-saw-genuine-worry-in-his-eyes-i-realized/)

[Lesley Livingston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lesley-livingston/)

## More by Byron Katie

> [The moment it begins to question itself, the mind becomes so clear that it starts working with itself rather than with the body's identification.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/the-moment-it-begins-to-question-itself-the-mind-becomes-so-clear/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [People don't need sudden revelations. They get what they need when they need it, thought by thought by thought. It's a constant thing when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/people-don-t-need-sudden-revelations-they-get-what-they-need-when/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [Your parents are your projection-nothing more.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/your-parents-are-your-projection-nothing-more/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [When a thought hurts, that’s the signal that it isn’t true.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/when-a-thought-hurts-that-s-the-signal-that-it-isn-t-true/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [Since the past is unreal and the future is unreal, all your thoughts are about nothing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/since-the-past-is-unreal-and-the-future-is-unreal-all-your-thoughts/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [I used to sleep on the floor next to the bed, because I believed that I didn't even deserve a bed to sleep in.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/i-used-to-sleep-on-the-floor-next-to-the-bed-because-i-believed-that/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [You can never make yourself believe that you're loveable, however hard you try, because when the chips are down what you really believe rises…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-can-never-make-yourself-believe-that-you-re-loveable-however-hard/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [“Your story is your identity, and you’d do almost anything to prove that it’s true. Inquiry into self is the only thing that has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/your-story-is-your-identity-and-you-d-do-almost-anything-to-prove/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [It's not what happens in life that bothers us. It's what we're believing about it that bothers us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/it-s-not-what-happens-in-life-that-bothers-us-it-s-what-we-re/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [Love asks for nothing. Only personalities want something.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/love-asks-for-nothing-only-personalities-want-something/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [I love what I think, and I'm never tempted to believe it. Thoughts are like the wind or the leaves on the trees or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/i-love-what-i-think-and-i-m-never-tempted-to-believe-it-thoughts-are/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [Reality doesn't wait for your opinion, vote, or permission, sweetheart. It just keeps being what it is and doing what it does.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/reality-doesn-t-wait-for-your-opinion-vote-or-permission-sweetheart/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [As long as we believe our thoughts, there will always be war.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/as-long-as-we-believe-our-thoughts-there-will-always-be-war/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [“Reality doesn’t wait for our agreement or approval. It is what it is. You can count on it. Gary:”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/reality-doesn-t-wait-for-our-agreement-or-approval-it-is-what-it-is/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

> [You can't drop concepts. You can only shine a little flashlight on them as you do inquiry, an you see that what you thought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/you-can-t-drop-concepts-you-can-only-shine-a-little-flashlight-on/)

[Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

[Explore all 480 Byron Katie quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/)

## More Anger and frustration quotes

> [“God, and that in the relationship you are both being smoothed. Yes, it hurts, and the reality is we do not like it and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-mullek/god-and-that-in-the-relationship-you-are-both-being-smoothed-yes-it/)

[Andrew Mullek](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-mullek/)

> [“You’re right,” Jacks said. “You’re not part of my world. You’re not one of those girls. And maybe that’s why.” “Why what?” “Why I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-speer/you-re-right-jacks-said-you-re-not-part-of-my-world-you-re-not-one-of/)

[Scott Speer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-speer/)

> [“We must not let her uncle send her into the gloom, which is what he always does.” “Is there a means to stop him?”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-mcnaught/we-must-not-let-her-uncle-send-her-into-the-gloom-which-is-what-he/)

[Judith McNaught](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-mcnaught/)

> [Women, especially in rural India, have to undergo such suffering and pain. It is important for our cinema to address their pain, anger, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bhumi-pednekar/women-especially-in-rural-india-have-to-undergo-such-suffering-and/)

[Bhumi Pednekar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bhumi-pednekar/)

> [“Yamane leaned over until he was right in Rory's face. "Being with me isn't sweet and romantic. I like it messy, desperate, and sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/z-a-maxfield/yamane-leaned-over-until-he-was-right-in-rory-s-face-being-with-me/)

[Z.A. Maxfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/z-a-maxfield/)

> [As children, we said no, we rebelled, we had temper tantrums and meltdowns. We tested our limits. Our parents' limits. All limits. As parents,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/as-children-we-said-no-we-rebelled-we-had-temper-tantrums-and/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Red is such an interesting color to correlate with emotion, because it's on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/taylor-swift/red-is-such-an-interesting-color-to-correlate-with-emotion-because-it/)

[Taylor Swift](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/taylor-swift/)

> [“Byron, as he burns on, sees more and more of this pattern. He learns how to make contact with other kinds of electric appliances,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-pynchon/byron-as-he-burns-on-sees-more-and-more-of-this-pattern-he-learns-how/)

[Thomas Pynchon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-pynchon/)

> [I'm almost always trying to be funny, even when I'm on my own. I think it's the desire to channel my anger and frustration…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-richardson/i-m-almost-always-trying-to-be-funny-even-when-i-m-on-my-own-i-think/)

[Jon Richardson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-richardson/)

> [The Arab soul is broken by poverty, unemployment, and general recession. The Tunisian revolution is not far from us. The Arab citizen entered an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amr-moussa/the-arab-soul-is-broken-by-poverty-unemployment-and-general-recession/)

[Amr Moussa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amr-moussa/)

> [My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/my-recipe-for-dealing-with-anger-and-frustration-set-the-kitchen/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [People communicate anger of course through facial expressions, but in voice, there's a wider spectrum, like cold anger and hot anger and frustration and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rana-el-kaliouby/people-communicate-anger-of-course-through-facial-expressions-but-in/)

[Rana el Kaliouby](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rana-el-kaliouby/)

> [“These past two days, I’ve seen a fire in your eyes that I never have before. Granted, it’s mostly anger and frustration, but it’s…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-donovan/these-past-two-days-i-ve-seen-a-fire-in-your-eyes-that-i-never-have/)

[Rebecca Donovan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-donovan/)

> [“So it was all like, Caroline continues to have behavioral problems. She struggling a lot with anger and frustration over not being able to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/so-it-was-all-like-caroline-continues-to-have-behavioral-problems-she/)

[John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/)

> [Yeah, to me, acting is very therapeutic. I get out a lot of anger and frustration.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/diane-kruger/yeah-to-me-acting-is-very-therapeutic-i-get-out-a-lot-of-anger-and/)

[Diane Kruger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/diane-kruger/)

[Browse all 47 Anger and frustration quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger-and-frustration/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused by another person. No one outside me can hurt me. That's not a possibility. It's only when I believe a stressful thought that I get hurt. And I'm the one who's hurting me by believing what I think. This is very good news, because it means that I don't have to get someone else to stop hurting me. I'm the one who can stop hurting me. It's within my power. What we are doing with inquiry is meeting our thoughts with some simple understanding, finally. Pain, anger, and frustration will let us know when it's time to inquire. We either believe what we think or we question it: there's no other choice. Questioning our thoughts is the kinder way. Inquiry always leaves us as more loving human beings.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Byron Katie"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-caused-by-another/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Anger and frustration"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-caused-by-another/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b0/byron-katie-553_anger-and-frustratio_hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind_244318.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Hurt feelings or discomfort of any kind cannot be caused by another person. No one outside me can hurt me…” — Byron Katie",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Byron Katie",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“Hurt feelings or discomfort of any...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-caused-by-another/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/hurt-feelings-or-discomfort-of-any-kind-cannot-be-caused-by-another/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
