--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to”…" description: "\"“But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when, truthfully, we already know “how to” yet we’re still standing in the same place longing for ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg" --- # But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when… ![“But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when, truthfully, we already know “how to” yet we’re still standing in the same place longing for more joy, connection, and meaning?” quote by Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg) > ““But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when, truthfully, we already know “how to” yet we’re still standing in the same place longing for more joy, connection, and meaning?”” [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. People are drawn to “how‑to” guides even though they already know the basics, because they seek deeper fulfillment and connection that simple instructions don’t provide. **In simple terms:** We chase guides for deeper meaning despite knowing basics. Key Takeaway Seek authentic experiences over quick fixes. Themes growth meaning connection self‑improvement Mood inspirational thought‑provoking Type philosophical motivational When to use this quote - personal development - coaching - team building - spiritual practice Key Concepts psychology motivation existential search Questions to Reflect On - Why do we prefer step‑by‑step solutions? - How can we balance knowledge with deeper purpose? A Different Perspective Quick fixes can ignore underlying issues and create dependency. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Dilemma](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dilemma/) [Dilemma Alluring](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dilemma-alluring-4786328/) [Longing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/longing/) [Longing Joy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/longing-joy-1397206/) [Place Longing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/place-longing-2632380/) ## Related quotes > [You said you knew the perfect place to run to. A place that was empty of people, and buildings, and far, far away. A…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lucy-christopher/you-said-you-knew-the-perfect-place-to-run-to-a-place-that-was-empty/) [Lucy Christopher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lucy-christopher/) > [ “The culmination of Sehnsucht \[Longing, Joy\] in the rhapsodic joy of heaven is, for me at least, the strongest single element in Lewis. 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Only then can we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lysa-terkeurst/it-is-good-for-god-s-people-to-be-put-in-a-place-of-longing-so-they/) [Lysa TerKeurst](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lysa-terkeurst/) > [As the Hindu gods are 'immortal' only in a very particular sense - for they had born and they die - they experience most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/as-the-hindu-gods-are-immortal-only-in-a-very-particular-sense-for-2/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“It was the dilemma all three of us had. Every choice we made cut us off permanently from someone we loved.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hyeonseo-lee/it-was-the-dilemma-all-three-of-us-had-every-choice-we-made-cut-us/) [Hyeonseo Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hyeonseo-lee/) > [This is our problem, our dilemma, yes? We cannot celebrate and declare ourselves to belong to the victorious nations because our brothers and our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manfred-rommel/this-is-our-problem-our-dilemma-yes-we-cannot-celebrate-and-declare/) [Manfred Rommel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manfred-rommel/) > [“Such elusive puzzles recall the historian's basic dilemma: the absence of evidence does not always signify evidence of absence. In the end, we will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-markel/such-elusive-puzzles-recall-the-historian-s-basic-dilemma-the-absence/) [Howard Markel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-markel/) > [On earth where love lives, Also the place where dilemma exists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/buddhachild/on-earth-where-love-lives-also-the-place-where-dilemma-exists/) [BuddhaChild](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/buddhachild/) > [Pure, hard-core liberals believe in a superior race. They think they're it. They believe they're more intelligent than the general run of mankind, better…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/pure-hard-core-liberals-believe-in-a-superior-race-they-think-they-re/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [“How can we get what we really want and at the same time deal with the needs of others in our lives? Perhaps no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-ury/how-can-we-get-what-we-really-want-and-at-the-same-time-deal-with-the/) [William Ury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-ury/) > [I understand why creative people like dark, but American audiences dont like dark. They like story. They do not respond to nervous breakdowns and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leslie-moonves/i-understand-why-creative-people-like-dark-but-american-audiences/) [Leslie Moonves](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leslie-moonves/) > [The person who is ignorant enough to believe that his nourishment depends on meat is in a horrible dilemma.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-bernard-shaw/the-person-who-is-ignorant-enough-to-believe-that-his-nourishment/) [George Bernard Shaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-bernard-shaw/) > [Anyone who will look at my life from the outside won't see the struggles inside. Sometimes, things are not always as we see or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chanda-kaushik/anyone-who-will-look-at-my-life-from-the-outside-won-t-see-the/) [Chanda Kaushik](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chanda-kaushik/) > [“When in dilemma, pause.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sravani-saha-nakhro/when-in-dilemma-pause/) [Sravani Saha Nakhro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sravani-saha-nakhro/) ## More by Brené Brown > [We're raising children who have little tolerance for disappointment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/we-re-raising-children-who-have-little-tolerance-for-disappointment/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“always put off writing by reorganizing my entire house and spending way too much time and money buying office supplies and organizing systems. Every…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/always-put-off-writing-by-reorganizing-my-entire-house-and-spending/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [When you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/when-you-ask-people-about-love-they-tell-you-about-heartbreak/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“I can recognize shame when it’s happening.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/i-can-recognize-shame-when-it-s-happening/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [I carry a small sheet of paper in my wallet that has written on it the names of people whose opinions of me matter.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/i-carry-a-small-sheet-of-paper-in-my-wallet-that-has-written-on-it/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/courage-starts-with-showing-up-and-letting-ourselves-be-seen/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [Waking up every day and loving someone who may or may not love us back, whose safety we can't ensure, who may stay in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/waking-up-every-day-and-loving-someone-who-may-or-may-not-love-us/) [Brene Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“No matter how separated we are by what we think and believe, we are part of the same spiritual story.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/no-matter-how-separated-we-are-by-what-we-think-and-believe-we-are/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect. Perfection is an unattainable goal. Additionally, perfectionism is more about perception -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/perfectionism-is-self-destructive-simply-because-there-is-no-such/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/shame-corrodes-the-very-part-of-us-that-believes-we-are-capable-of/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [If you're also in the arena and you're putting your ideas out and you're owning them and you're saying "I disagree with you about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/if-you-re-also-in-the-arena-and-you-re-putting-your-ideas-out-and-you/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“I found that men and women with high levels of shame resilience share these four elements: They understand shame and recognize what messages and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/i-found-that-men-and-women-with-high-levels-of-shame-resilience-share/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [Connection gives purpose and meaning to our lives.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/connection-gives-purpose-and-meaning-to-our-lives/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“But here’s the tricky part about compassion and connecting: We can’t call just anyone. It’s not that simple. I have a lot of good…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/but-here-s-the-tricky-part-about-compassion-and-connecting-we-can-t/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) > [“It turns out to be the place of true belonging, and it's the bravest and most sacred place you'll stand.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/it-turns-out-to-be-the-place-of-true-belonging-and-it-s-the-bravest/) [Brené Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) [Explore all 759 Brené Brown quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/) ## More Dilemma quotes > [“When in dilemma, pause.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sravani-saha-nakhro/when-in-dilemma-pause/) [Sravani Saha Nakhro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sravani-saha-nakhro/) > [Anyone who will look at my life from the outside won't see the struggles inside. Sometimes, things are not always as we see or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chanda-kaushik/anyone-who-will-look-at-my-life-from-the-outside-won-t-see-the/) [Chanda Kaushik](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chanda-kaushik/) > [The person who is ignorant enough to believe that his nourishment depends on meat is in a horrible dilemma.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-bernard-shaw/the-person-who-is-ignorant-enough-to-believe-that-his-nourishment/) [George Bernard Shaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-bernard-shaw/) > [I understand why creative people like dark, but American audiences dont like dark. They like story. They do not respond to nervous breakdowns and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leslie-moonves/i-understand-why-creative-people-like-dark-but-american-audiences/) [Leslie Moonves](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leslie-moonves/) > [“How can we get what we really want and at the same time deal with the needs of others in our lives? Perhaps no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-ury/how-can-we-get-what-we-really-want-and-at-the-same-time-deal-with-the/) [William Ury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-ury/) > [Pure, hard-core liberals believe in a superior race. They think they're it. They believe they're more intelligent than the general run of mankind, better…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/pure-hard-core-liberals-believe-in-a-superior-race-they-think-they-re/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [On earth where love lives, Also the place where dilemma exists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/buddhachild/on-earth-where-love-lives-also-the-place-where-dilemma-exists/) [BuddhaChild](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/buddhachild/) > [“Such elusive puzzles recall the historian's basic dilemma: the absence of evidence does not always signify evidence of absence. In the end, we will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-markel/such-elusive-puzzles-recall-the-historian-s-basic-dilemma-the-absence/) [Howard Markel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-markel/) > [This is our problem, our dilemma, yes? We cannot celebrate and declare ourselves to belong to the victorious nations because our brothers and our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manfred-rommel/this-is-our-problem-our-dilemma-yes-we-cannot-celebrate-and-declare/) [Manfred Rommel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manfred-rommel/) > [“It was the dilemma all three of us had. Every choice we made cut us off permanently from someone we loved.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hyeonseo-lee/it-was-the-dilemma-all-three-of-us-had-every-choice-we-made-cut-us/) [Hyeonseo Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hyeonseo-lee/) > [As the Hindu gods are 'immortal' only in a very particular sense - for they had born and they die - they experience most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/as-the-hindu-gods-are-immortal-only-in-a-very-particular-sense-for-2/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Science is important, but so is ethics, so is balancing life. To destroy life to save life - it's one of the real ethical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/science-is-important-but-so-is-ethics-so-is-balancing-life-to-destroy/) [George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/) > [The great thing about the dilemma we're in is that we get to re-imagine every single thing we do...There isn't a single thing that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-hawken/the-great-thing-about-the-dilemma-we-re-in-is-that-we-get-to-re/) [Paul Hawken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-hawken/) > [Our only goal is to strengthen the opposition and to avoid the dilemma whereby we only have the choice between Bashar Assad and al-Qaeda.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francois-hollande/our-only-goal-is-to-strengthen-the-opposition-and-to-avoid-the/) [Francois Hollande](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francois-hollande/) > [Developed and benefited from the unsustainable patterns of production and consumption which have produced our present dilemma. It is clear that current lifestyles and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maurice-strong/developed-and-benefited-from-the-unsustainable-patterns-of-production/) [Maurice Strong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maurice-strong/) [Browse all 417 Dilemma quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dilemma/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when, truthfully, we already know “how to” yet we’re still standing in the same place longing for more joy, connection, and meaning?”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brené Brown" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so-alluring-when-truthfully-we/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Dilemma" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so-alluring-when-truthfully-we/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6eb/bren-brown-280_quote_but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so_1381291.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“But here’s the dilemma: Why is “how-to” so alluring when, truthfully, we already know “how to” yet we’re…” — Brené Brown", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Brené Brown", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bren-brown/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“But here’s the dilemma: Why is...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so-alluring-when-truthfully-we/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bren-brown/but-here-s-the-dilemma-why-is-how-to-so-alluring-when-truthfully-we/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```