--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The only thing we accomplish by accenting…" description: "\"“The only thing we accomplish by accenting the child’s constitution, his temperament, his natural dilemmas and his own synthesizing activity, is to tak..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/becker-ernest-86902_children_the-only-thing-we-accomplish-by-accentin_1145458.jpg" --- # The only thing we accomplish by accenting the child’s… ![“The only thing we accomplish by accenting the child’s constitution, his temperament, his natural dilemmas and his own synthesizing activity, is to take the parents “off the hook" of their own burden of guilt for how their children turn out. But why should they have such unreasonable guilt anyway?…” quote by Becker Ernest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/becker-ernest-86902_children_the-only-thing-we-accomplish-by-accentin_1145458.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/becker-ernest-86902_children_the-only-thing-we-accomplish-by-accentin_1145458.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/becker-ernest-86902_children_the-only-thing-we-accomplish-by-accentin_1145458.jpg) > ““The only thing we accomplish by accenting the child’s constitution, his temperament, his natural dilemmas and his own synthesizing activity, is to take the parents “off the hook" of their own burden of guilt for how their children turn out. But why should they have such unreasonable guilt anyway? Didn’t Nietzsche point out that the only creatures who deserve to feel guilt (or pride) are gods, since only they have undisputed freedom of action? Perhaps we could say that if parents want to feel a bit godlike they are entitled to feel a little guilt; and if they were gods they would deserve to feel plenty.”” Becker Ernest ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The quote argues that blaming children’s traits shifts responsibility from parents, questioning why parents should feel guilt, and suggesting only beings with true freedom (like gods) deserve guilt or pride. **In simple terms:** Blaming kids lets parents avoid guilt; only truly free beings should feel guilt. Key Takeaway Recognize personal responsibility instead of shifting blame. Themes responsibility guilt parenting freedom philosophy Mood reflective critical thoughtful Type analytical philosophical ethical When to use this quote - parent‑child relationships - therapy sessions - educational workshops - family counseling Key Concepts ethics psychology existentialism Questions to Reflect On - How do you hold yourself accountable without blaming others? - Can guilt ever be constructive? A Different Perspective Guilt may still arise from societal expectations despite philosophical arguments. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Guilt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/guilt/) [Nature](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nature/) ## Related quotes > [I don't believe in collective guilt. The children of killers are not killers, but children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elie-wiesel/i-don-t-believe-in-collective-guilt-the-children-of-killers-are-not/) [Elie Wiesel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elie-wiesel/) > [The essence of having fun is enjoying without guilt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-essence-of-having-fun-is-enjoying-without-guilt/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [No amount of guilt can solve the past & No amount of anxiety can change the future](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ananymous/no-amount-of-guilt-can-solve-the-past-no-amount-of-anxiety-can-change/) [Ananymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ananymous/) > [“Phil and Hannah had decided that Christian guilt was better than bad math”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rhoda-janzen/phil-and-hannah-had-decided-that-christian-guilt-was-better-than-bad/) [rhoda janzen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rhoda-janzen/) > [Anger was better than tears, better than grief, better than guilt.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/anger-was-better-than-tears-better-than-grief-better-than-guilt/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Food ... love ... mother ... career ... Live every day to the fullest. Partake of the four basic guilt groups.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cathy-guisewite/food-love-mother-career-live-every-day-to-the-fullest-partake-of-the/) [Cathy Guisewite](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cathy-guisewite/) > [Money should not be in the hands of individuals; otherwise it will create this problem of being burdened with guilt. And money can make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rajneesh/money-should-not-be-in-the-hands-of-individuals-otherwise-it-will/) [Rajneesh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rajneesh/) > [(I)f we are going to be kind, let it be out of simple generosity, not because we fear guilt or retribution.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-f-we-are-going-to-be-kind-let-it-be-out-of-simple-generosity-not/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Regrets are just a way for the foolish and the guilty to pass the time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gensoumaden-saiyuki/regrets-are-just-a-way-for-the-foolish-and-the-guilty-to-pass-the-time/) Gensoumaden Saiyuki > [But victimhood was seductive, a release from responsibility and caring. Fear would be transmuted into weary resignation; failure would no longer generate guilt but,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/but-victimhood-was-seductive-a-release-from-responsibility-and-caring/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [“The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-dsouza/the-sole-reason-i-stand-to-open-it-up-now-is-that-lots-of-people-who/) [Patricia Dsouza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-dsouza/) > [“Even in the miserable guilt we feel over our beastlike insensitivity, the glory of God shines. If God were not gloriously desirable, why would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-piper/even-in-the-miserable-guilt-we-feel-over-our-beastlike-insensitivity/) [John Piper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-piper/) > [When the Lord Jesus Christ became my surety . . . He went to Calvary's cross, and all my guilt was charged against Him.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-allen-ironside/when-the-lord-jesus-christ-became-my-surety-he-went-to-calvary-s/) [Henry Allen Ironside](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-allen-ironside/) > [“As parents who make every effort we can to raise our children in loving security, we do not need to feel more guilt than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabor-mat/as-parents-who-make-every-effort-we-can-to-raise-our-children-in/) [Gabor Maté](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabor-mat/) > [Never fight on the wrong side; you might win but the burden of guilt is more than a loss.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lilian-salan/never-fight-on-the-wrong-side-you-might-win-but-the-burden-of-guilt/) [Lilian Salan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lilian-salan/) ## More by Becker Ernest > [“By the time we grow up we become masters at dissimulation, at cultivating a self that the world cannot probe. But we pay a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becker-ernest/by-the-time-we-grow-up-we-become-masters-at-dissimulation-at/) Becker Ernest > [“Try repeating “man is an animal" a few times, just to notice how unconvincing it sounds. There seems to be no way to get…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becker-ernest/try-repeating-man-is-an-animal-a-few-times-just-to-notice-how/) Becker Ernest Explore all 3 Becker Ernest quotes ## More Children quotes > [I am certain that children always know more than they are able to tell, and that makes the big difference between them and adults,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacques-lusseyran/i-am-certain-that-children-always-know-more-than-they-are-able-to/) [Jacques Lusseyran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacques-lusseyran/) > [Behind every successful child is an adult who believed in him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-warren/behind-every-successful-child-is-an-adult-who-believed-in-him/) [Rick Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-warren/) > [I believe in freedom to do what you want if you aren't hurting others, but pictures of obese protesters giving their children big gulps.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-defranco/i-believe-in-freedom-to-do-what-you-want-if-you-aren-t-hurting-others/) [Philip DeFranco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-defranco/) > [If the audience likes your work, if they like you, they don't think whether you are married or have children or not. 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