---
title: "Best T.J. Klune Lines"
description: "Travis John Klune is an American writer of fantasy and romantic stories with gay and LGBTQ+ characters. His novel The House in the Cerulean Sea became a..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e8a/t-j-klune-1425_humor_he-ll-probably-end-up-angling-for-a-thre_934312.jpg"
---

# T.J. Klune

(1982)   Novelist

 **241** quotes in **289** categories

Rate this collection:  ★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

T.J. Klune is a novelist.

## Quick Facts About T.J. Klune

Born May 20, 1982

Profession Novelist

## About T.J. Klune

Travis John Klune is an American author who writes fantasy and romantic stories that feature gay and LGBTQ+ characters. His novel The House in the Cerulean Sea became a New York Times bestseller and won the 2021 Alex and Mythopoeic Awards. He also received the Lambda Literary Award for Gay Romance.

##  Quotes by T.J. Klune · Page 6

> [“He'll probably end up angling for a threesome. Then I'll have to get my animal name so I can be a part…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/he-ll-probably-end-up-angling-for-a-threesome-then-i-ll-have-to-get/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Humor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e8a/t-j-klune-1425_humor_he-ll-probably-end-up-angling-for-a-thre_934312.jpg)

> [“The bastard. How dare he? I was drowning in a fucking river that he was still attempting to save me from, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/the-bastard-how-dare-he-i-was-drowning-in-a-fucking-river-that-he-was/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Death](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/death/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/62c/t-j-klune-1425_death_the-bastard-how-dare-he-i-was-drowning-i_1762164.jpg)

> [“The choices humans make are like a ripple in a pond. They carry from one to another, bouncing, dancing. Colliding. And still…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/the-choices-humans-make-are-like-a-ripple-in-a-pond-they-carry-from/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Choice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choice/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bbb/t-j-klune-1425_choice_the-choices-humans-make-are-like-a-rippl_2487198.jpg)

> [“He said… he said he wants you to know that those we love are never really gone.” Michael closes his eyes. “We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/he-said-he-said-he-wants-you-to-know-that-those-we-love-are-never/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Remember](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/remember/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d3b/t-j-klune-1425_quote_he-said-he-said-he-wants-you-to-know-tha_1756286.jpg)

> [“Wait until you meet the therapist. That bad? Let's just say i can't believe he's a real person. Like Santa Claus? More…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/wait-until-you-meet-the-therapist-that-bad-let-s-just-say-i-can-t/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Believe in santa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/believe-in-santa/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f97/t-j-klune-1425_believe-in-santa_wait-until-you-meet-the-therapist-that-b_1578180.jpg)

> [“After what happened to the Toyota, Seven says you aren't allowed to drive a vehicle again worth more than fifteen grand.' 'What!'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/after-what-happened-to-the-toyota-seven-says-you-aren-t-allowed-to/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Clock-twins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/clock-twins-33825/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d19/t-j-klune-1425_clock-twins_after-what-happened-to-the-toyota-seven_402757.jpg)

> [“I asked him once why he wanted to see the sun rise every morning, what it was that caused him to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/i-asked-him-once-why-he-wanted-to-see-the-sun-rise-every-morning-what/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Every day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/every-day/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b62/t-j-klune-1425_every-day_i-asked-him-once-why-he-wanted-to-see-th_1152487.jpg)

> [“Don’t even try to figure out where that came from. I assure you the logic chain in Bear’s head makes sense if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/don-t-even-try-to-figure-out-where-that-came-from-i-assure-you-the/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Boatk-short](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boatk-short-21936/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/55b/t-j-klune-1425_boatk-short_don-t-even-try-to-figure-out-where-that_2767837.jpg)

> [“Do some magic,” Ryan whispered to me, right in my ear. “Slowly. So I can watch.” “When we get out of here,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/do-some-magic-ryan-whispered-to-me-right-in-my-ear-slowly-so-i-can/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Gaze](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gaze/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/105/t-j-klune-1425_stop-talking_do-some-magic-ryan-whispered-to-me-right_2085683.jpg)

> [“If one were to ask if Linus Baker was lonely, he would have scrunched up his face in surprise. The thought would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/if-one-were-to-ask-if-linus-baker-was-lonely-he-would-have-scrunched/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Loneliness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loneliness/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e92/t-j-klune-1425_loneliness_if-one-were-to-ask-if-linus-baker-was-lo_2904720.jpg)

> [“I think it’d be nice,” he said, words slurring slightly. “If you came here. If you stayed. We’d drink tea and talk…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/i-think-it-d-be-nice-he-said-words-slurring-slightly-if-you-came-here/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Emotional-moment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotional-moment/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/29a/t-j-klune-1425_emotional-moment_i-think-it-d-be-nice-he-said-words-slurr_768461.jpg)

> [“Ungh,” Ryan said. “That shit is so hot.” Everyone turned to stare at him. He was bright red. “I said that out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/ungh-ryan-said-that-shit-is-so-hot-everyone-turned-to-stare-at-him-he/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Gaze](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gaze/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d8b/t-j-klune-1425_gaze_ungh-ryan-said-that-shit-is-so-hot-every_3233178.jpg)

> [“Demi means you need to have a connection with someone before you can have romantic and/or sexual attraction,” Serge said. “And dude,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/demi-means-you-need-to-have-a-connection-with-someone-before-you-can/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Cute moments](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cute-moments/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb0/t-j-klune-1425_cute-moments_demi-means-you-need-to-have-a-connection_394822.jpg)

> [“Everyone grieves differently. No one handles the loss of a loved one the same. Some put on a brave face for others,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/everyone-grieves-differently-no-one-handles-the-loss-of-a-loved-one/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Brave face](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brave-face/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b7c/t-j-klune-1425_brave-face_everyone-grieves-differently-no-one-hand_378102.jpg)

> [“With him, I don’t have to worry about all the other bullshit that’s going on. I don’t have to wonder why I’m…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/with-him-i-don-t-have-to-worry-about-all-the-other-bullshit-that-s/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Good enough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good-enough/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8c0/t-j-klune-1425_good-enough_with-him-i-don-t-have-to-worry-about-all_1561684.jpg)

> [“You told me it was like the fight for me is all you’ve ever known. I think about that a lot and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/you-told-me-it-was-like-the-fight-for-me-is-all-you-ve-ever-known-i/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Come home](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/come-home/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c58/t-j-klune-1425_fighting_you-told-me-it-was-like-the-fight-for-me_1721510.jpg)

> [“Remember what I told you about need versus want? We don't need you because that implies you had to fix something in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/remember-what-i-told-you-about-need-versus-want-we-don-t-need-you/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Belonging-to-someone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/belonging-to-someone/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/445/t-j-klune-1425_belonging-to-someone_remember-what-i-told-you-about-need-vers_518579.jpg)

> [“Otter pulls me up to the bar and leans over. “What’s wrong? You stink!” he shouts. I glare at him. “I smell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/otter-pulls-me-up-to-the-bar-and-leans-over-what-s-wrong-you-stink-he/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Otter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/otter/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/996/t-j-klune-1425_quote_otter-pulls-me-up-to-the-bar-and-leans-o_1993574.jpg)

> [“once something is shattered, it can never be put back together in its original shape. Undoubtedly some pieces are lost or fit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/once-something-is-shattered-it-can-never-be-put-back-together-in-its/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Falling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/falling/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df6/t-j-klune-1425_quote_once-something-is-shattered-it-can-never_926903.jpg)

> [“I bet there’s like an Easter egg on one of the DVDs,” Sandy said, taking a drink of his tea. “A deleted…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/i-bet-there-s-like-an-easter-egg-on-one-of-the-dvds-sandy-said-taking/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Easter egg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/easter-egg/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/315/t-j-klune-1425_easter-egg_i-bet-there-s-like-an-easter-egg-on-one_1346318.jpg)

> [“Otter. Otter. Otter,” I mutter. “Yes, Bear?” he says beautifully. “Don’t lead cows to slaughter,” I say. He arches an eyebrow. “Come…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/otter-otter-otter-i-mutter-yes-bear-he-says-beautifully-don-t-lead/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Otter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/otter/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/043/t-j-klune-1425_otter_otter-otter-otter-i-mutter-yes-bear-he-s_2729728.jpg)

> [“When you stand up for yourself, you never know if you’re standing up for someone who isn’t ready to do the same.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/when-you-stand-up-for-yourself-you-never-know-if-you-re-standing-up/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Courage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/courage/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5c0/t-j-klune-1425_courage_when-you-stand-up-for-yourself-you-never_96330.jpg)

> [“My fairy drag mother. The woman who had taught me to trust myself and my instincts. Morgan could teach me magic. My…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/my-fairy-drag-mother-the-woman-who-had-taught-me-to-trust-myself-and/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73c/t-j-klune-1425_mother_my-fairy-drag-mother-the-woman-who-had-t_1400647.jpg)

> [“Stop that.” “Stop what?” “You’re thinking too hard. I can see it on your face. Just be here. Right now. With me.”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/stop-that-stop-what-you-re-thinking-too-hard-i-can-see-it-on-your/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Emotional-moment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotional-moment/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e6/t-j-klune-1425_emotional-moment_stop-that-stop-what-you-re-thinking-too_6397.jpg)

> [“Oh boy,” the unicorn said. “You do that, Robert Smith.” I frowned at him. “Who?” The unicorn shook his head. “This guy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/oh-boy-the-unicorn-said-you-do-that-robert-smith-i-frowned-at-him-who/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Old people](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/old-people/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d5/t-j-klune-1425_old-people_oh-boy-the-unicorn-said-you-do-that-robe_535005.jpg)

> [“Life is like this: it aches. It’s biting, and you ache from it. You are strong, because they tell you that you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/life-is-like-this-it-aches-it-s-biting-and-you-ache-from-it-you-are/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/39c/t-j-klune-1425_life_life-is-like-this-it-aches-it-s-biting-a_465005.jpg)

> [“The big kid hasn't said anything yet. 'I do like hearing myself talk,' I say, 'only because I have a lot of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/the-big-kid-hasn-t-said-anything-yet-i-do-like-hearing-myself-talk-i/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Communication](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/communication/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5db/t-j-klune-1425_communication_the-big-kid-hasn-t-said-anything-yet-i-d_2610055.jpg)

> [“And if there is one last thing I would have you know before we reach these final pages, it's that sometimes, no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/and-if-there-is-one-last-thing-i-would-have-you-know-before-we-reach/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Burn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/burn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd8/t-j-klune-1425_burn_and-if-there-is-one-last-thing-i-would-h_288364.jpg)

> [“I may not be the biggest Kid in the world, and I may not be the smartest, and I may not have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/i-may-not-be-the-biggest-kid-in-the-world-and-i-may-not-be-the/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ed/t-j-klune-1425_love_i-may-not-be-the-biggest-kid-in-the-worl_2393429.jpg)

> [“He’s on money though, right?” Creed asks. “Yeah, he is. How’d he do that if he wasn’t president?” “He probably had a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/he-s-on-money-though-right-creed-asks-yeah-he-is-how-d-he-do-that-if/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Big dick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/big-dick/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/449/t-j-klune-1425_big-dick_he-s-on-money-though-right-creed-asks-ye_1230141.jpg)

> [“But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise.” His voice cracked and my hands shook.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/but-you-have-to-believe-me-that-it-s-always-been-you-i-promise-i/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Promise](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/promise/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee3/t-j-klune-1425_quote_but-you-have-to-believe-me-that-it-s-alw_882799.jpg)

> [“He gave me a lot, but it would have never been enough.” He looks thoughtful as he gazes back down at me.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/he-gave-me-a-lot-but-it-would-have-never-been-enough-he-looks/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Boatk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boatk-21934/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b3/t-j-klune-1425_boatk_he-gave-me-a-lot-but-it-would-have-never_2190702.jpg)

> [“Are they speaking in code?” Mom asked Dad, trying to be quiet but failing miserably. “I don’t know,” Dad said. “I don’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/are-they-speaking-in-code-mom-asked-dad-trying-to-be-quiet-but/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Programming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/programming/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/941/t-j-klune-1425_programming_are-they-speaking-in-code-mom-asked-dad_226930.jpg)

> [“Michael doesn't flinch. 'You can't know,' he says quietly, 'how much you truly love something until it's gone.' 'That's not fair,' I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/michael-doesn-t-flinch-you-can-t-know-he-says-quietly-how-much-you/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Angels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/angels/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c87/t-j-klune-1425_angels_michael-doesn-t-flinch-you-can-t-know-he_2483368.jpg)

> [“Otter says nothing and as I turn to look at him, he’s watching me, that gold-green shining with that regard that always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/otter-says-nothing-and-as-i-turn-to-look-at-him-he-s-watching-me-that/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Asks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cde/t-j-klune-1425_asks_otter-says-nothing-and-as-i-turn-to-look_2515257.jpg)

> [“Bear, I think having sand in your butt crack must be really uncomfortable. Maybe you should go change your clothes. You don’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/bear-i-think-having-sand-in-your-butt-crack-must-be-really/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Butt Crack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/butt-crack-1522602/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e9/t-j-klune-1425_butt-crack_bear-i-think-having-sand-in-your-butt-cr_595705.jpg)

> [“Time is a river, I've learned. Always moving forward. But for people like me, people who have loved and lost, the river…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/time-is-a-river-i-ve-learned-always-moving-forward-but-for-people/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Loved and lost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loved-and-lost/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e72/t-j-klune-1425_loved-and-lost_time-is-a-river-i-ve-learned-always-movi_940337.jpg)

> [“I’ve never told anyone this, but anytime that I’ve felt sad or alone or angry or upset, I would pray to God…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/i-ve-never-told-anyone-this-but-anytime-that-i-ve-felt-sad-or-alone/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Boatk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boatk-21934/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26e/t-j-klune-1425_boatk_i-ve-never-told-anyone-this-but-anytime_1426442.jpg)

> [“The whole gay thing. You know, I’ve been doing some research about that.” Uh-oh. “Have you?” “Yes.” I wait, but he just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/the-whole-gay-thing-you-know-i-ve-been-doing-some-research-about-that/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Homosexuality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/homosexuality/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ecb/t-j-klune-1425_homosexuality_the-whole-gay-thing-you-know-i-ve-been-d_2493235.jpg)

> [“So while I drove my little and planned his fantasy night of how I was going to give Otter the key to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-j-klune/so-while-i-drove-my-little-and-planned-his-fantasy-night-of-how-i-was/)

[T.J. Klune](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-j-klune/)

[Activism](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/activism/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/676/t-j-klune-1425_activism_so-while-i-drove-my-little-and-planned-h_455858.jpg)

## T.J. Klune by topic

[Humor (24)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/t-j-klune/) [Time (20)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/t-j-klune/) [Love (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/t-j-klune/) [Life (13)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/t-j-klune/) [Gaze (12)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gaze/t-j-klune/) [Emotional-moment (11)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotional-moment/t-j-klune/) [Who we are (10)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/who-we-are/t-j-klune/)

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                        "text": "“The bastard. How dare he? I was drowning in a fucking river that he was still attempting to save me from, and he was telling me he was going to push me back in and hold me under. My father's death had nearly destroyed me. Cal's death would finish me.”",
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                        "text": "“Don’t even try to figure out where that came from. I assure you the logic chain in Bear’s head makes sense if you actually know him (and by ‘makes sense’ I mean in a Bear way), but for a newbie like you, it’ll probably just break your mind”",
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                        "text": "“Do some magic,” Ryan whispered to me, right in my ear. “Slowly. So I can watch.” “When we get out of here, I’m going to do so much magic all over you,” I told him. “You’re going to be covered in it.” At that moment, I really wished I’d been born mute and had never set eyes on Ryan Foxheart. “Make it stop!” Gary wailed. “Yeah. Cover me in your magic.” Ryan was blushing so hard, I thought his face was about to explode. “I want to stop talking. You have no idea how much I want to stop talking.” He leaned closer and I could feel his breath on my face. It smelled of corn and eroticism. “Um,” Eloise said. “Maybe you guys could—” We ignored her completely. “I’m going to do so many spells,” I said, because it seemed impossible for me to stop. “You won’t even believe how many spells I can do. Flora Bora Slam, motherfucker.” Our lips were inches apart. “I want you to Flora Bora Slam me,” Ryan said and I just choked. “Therapy,” Gary said. “I’m going to need so much therapy. It’s like watching cows mating and it’s wet and sticky and uncomfortable but I can’t look away because I’m worried some of it is going to get on me.”",
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                        "text": "“If one were to ask if Linus Baker was lonely, he would have scrunched up his face in surprise. The thought would be foreign, almost shocking. And though the smallest of lies hurt his head and made his stomach twist, there was a chance he would still say no, even though he was, and almost desperately so. And maybe part of him would believe it. He'd accepted long ago that some people, no matter how good their heart was or how much love they had to give, would always be alone. It was their lot in life, and Linus had figured out, at the age of twenty-seven, that it seemed to be that way for him. Oh, there was no specific event that brought along this line of thinking. It was just that he felt. . . dimmer than others. Like he was faded in a crystal-clear world. He wasn't meant to be seen.”",
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                        "text": "“I think it’d be nice,” he said, words slurring slightly. “If you came here. If you stayed. We’d drink tea and talk and one day, I’d tell you that I loved you. That I couldn’t imagine my life without you. You made me want more than I ever thought I could have. Such a funny little dream.” His eyes closed and didn’t reopen. He breathed in and out, lips parting. After a time, Wallace said, “And I would tell you that you made me happier than I’d ever been. You and Mei and Nelson and Apollo. That if I could, I’d stay with you forever. That I love you too. Of course I do. How could I not? Look at you. Just look at you. Such a funny little dream.”",
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                        "text": "“Ungh,” Ryan said. “That shit is so hot.” Everyone turned to stare at him. He was bright red. “I said that out loud, didn’t I? Dammit.” “What?” I squeaked. “When you do magic, it turns me on,” Ryan said, shaking his head frantically. “Ah gods. I can’t—stop. Just stop. Ahhh, I get erections when you cast spells. Oh shit.” “Sweet molasses,” I managed to say. “This… this is not what I thought was going to happen today,” Gary said. “What you think happen?” Tiggy asked. “I thought Ryan and Sam would continue to ignore how much they want to bone each other and we would all be suffering in silence because Sam won’t pull his head out of his ass to see that Ryan wants to eat said ass for dinner.” “I do,” Ryan said through gritted teeth. “For breakfast, even. And lunch. And a midnight snack. Especially when you do magic.” “You have a magic kink?” I said, because that was the only thing I could focus on. “Yes. But only for you. Your magic gets me hard,” he said, looking like he wished he could be anywhere but where he was. “When you do anything, I get hard, really. Even your ridiculous sex puns. You remember when you wrapped those Dark wizards in stone at the restaurant?” “Yeah,” I managed to say. “I wanted to tell you that you gave me an e-rock-tion.” He bent over and banged his forehead against the table. “Why, why, why did I say that out loud? Please. Someone. Anyone. Kill me.” “Sex puns,” I breathed. “Knight Delicious Face said a sex pun.” “There it is again!” he exclaimed. “Knight Delicious Face. What is that?” “You’re a knight,” I said. “And your face is delicious.” “You think I’m delicious?” he said, suddenly shy. “Oh my gods,” Gary moaned. “This is so awkward I can’t even stand it. I physically hurt from how awkward this is. I don’t even care that we’re apparently in mortal danger. I just don’t want to listen to you two flirt anymore. Eloise? Yoo-hoo, Eloise? If you’re going to kill us, can you please do it now? I can’t take this anymore.”",
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                        "text": "“Demi means you need to have a connection with someone before you can have romantic and/or sexual attraction,” Serge said. “And dude, you have a connection with him. Like a hard-core connection. You’re connecting all over the place.” “That’s not what this is,” Josy said faintly, though he was starting to doubt his own words. “You care about him, right?” “Yeah.” “Do you want to hold his hand?” “Oh yeah.” “Hug him?” “Such good hugs,” Josy whispered fervently. “Kiss him?” Yes. Yes he did. “Holy freaking crap,” Josy breathed. “I find Quincy Moore attractive.” Xander threw up his hands. “Good god, finally.” “I think he’s sexy.” “Good for you, man,” Serge said. “I want to put my mouth on his mouth.” “Okay,” Serge said. “That’s… good.” “He’s hot,” Josy said. “Like, frigging hot. I mean, the whole sex thing can wait or whatever, but goddamn. Have you seen him? I wish I was a blanket so I could lay on top of him all the time and keep him warm.”",
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                        "text": "“Everyone grieves differently. No one handles the loss of a loved one the same. Some put on a brave face for others, keeping everything internal. Others let it all out at once and shatter, only to pick up the pieces just as quickly as they came apart. Still others don't grieve at all, implying they are incapable of emotion. Then there are the ones like me, where grief is a badge we wear, where it's hard to let go because we don't want to. We probably wouldn't know how even is we wanted to. There's unanswered questions, unresolved feelings. Tere is anger that this person could even conceive of leaving us behind. We are the furious ones, the ones that scream at the injustice and the pain. We are the ones who obsess and slowly lose rational thought, knowing it is happening but unable to find a way to care. We are the ones who drown.”",
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                        "text": "“With him, I don’t have to worry about all the other bullshit that’s going on. I don’t have to wonder why I’m not smart enough, or why I’m not good enough. Paul doesn’t care about that stuff. I’m not smart, Matty. I know that. I say dumb stuff sometimes, and most of the time, I don’t know what I’m talking about. I don’t even understand what Paul says half the time, but it doesn’t matter to me because it doesn’t matter to him. I think he likes me just the way I am, and I’ve never had that before. Not really. I don’t have to be anyone else but myself with Paul, and I think that’s okay with him.”",
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                        "text": "“You told me it was like the fight for me is all you’ve ever known. I think about that a lot and someplace inside me, some secret place that I can only look at for a little bit at a time, I know you’re right. I know this because I’ve been fighting for you to come home. I’ve been screaming and dying and praying for you to come home, and it’s taken so long, but now it’s like you never left, and I can’t seem to fit that together in my mind.”",
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                        "text": "“Remember what I told you about need versus want? We don't need you because that implies you had to fix something in us. We were never broken. We want you, Wallace. Every piece. Every part. Because we're family. Can you see the difference?”",
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                        "text": "“Otter pulls me up to the bar and leans over. “What’s wrong? You stink!” he shouts. I glare at him. “I smell fine, you asshole. I used your cologne.” He rolls his eyes and comes closer, his lips against my ear. I shiver. “I said, what do you want to drink?”",
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                        "text": "“once something is shattered, it can never be put back together in its original shape. Undoubtedly some pieces are lost or fit into incorrect places. The whole will never be as strong as it was once before.”",
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                        "text": "“I bet there’s like an Easter egg on one of the DVDs,” Sandy said, taking a drink of his tea. “A deleted scene that shows Eeyore jerking off to a photo of Pooh fucking Piglet while hanging himself with his tail in the closet.”",
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                        "text": "“Otter. Otter. Otter,” I mutter. “Yes, Bear?” he says beautifully. “Don’t lead cows to slaughter,” I say. He arches an eyebrow. “Come again?” I take a deep breath. “I… love you and I know I should’ve told ya soon-a.” His eyes widen slightly. “Wait, what? You… me?” I shake my head. “But you didn’t buy the dolphin-safe tuna.” “Bear, what the hell? Did you just… rhyme?”",
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                        "text": "“When you stand up for yourself, you never know if you’re standing up for someone who isn’t ready to do the same. And you might be giving them the courage to do it somewhere down the road. And when they do, they help someone else. And it keeps on going down the line.”",
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                        "text": "“My fairy drag mother. The woman who had taught me to trust myself and my instincts. Morgan could teach me magic. My parents could teach me morals. Gary and Tiggy could teach me brotherhood. But Mama taught me that while life had sharp edges, it would only cut you if you allowed it to.”",
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                        "text": "“Stop that.” “Stop what?” “You’re thinking too hard. I can see it on your face. Just be here. Right now. With me.” And how could I refuse that? I said, “I’m here.” “You are.” “Right now.” “Yes.” “With you.” And god, how he smiled at me.”",
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                        "text": "“Oh boy,” the unicorn said. “You do that, Robert Smith.” I frowned at him. “Who?” The unicorn shook his head. “This guy I knew. Crazy hair. Sad all the time. Used to sing about it. It got old real fast. Before your time.” Whatever. It was probably stupid old people music, anyway.”",
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                        "text": "“The big kid hasn't said anything yet. 'I do like hearing myself talk,' I say, 'only because I have a lot of neat things to say, but eventually the conversation will run out in, like, four or five years, and then where will we be?' Wonder of all wonders, he cracks a little smile. I don't blame him. I am pretty funny.”",
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                        "text": "“He’s on money though, right?” Creed asks. “Yeah, he is. How’d he do that if he wasn’t president?” “He probably had a big dick.” I grin. “Like the bigger it was, the higher the bill you would be on or something?” “Yeah. Poor George,” Creed says, laughing. “Of course, I would be on the million-dollar bill.”",
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                        "text": "“But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise.” His voice cracked and my hands shook. “I promise, because when I look upon these stars, there is nothing I wish for more than you.”",
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                        "text": "“Are they speaking in code?” Mom asked Dad, trying to be quiet but failing miserably. “I don’t know,” Dad said. “I don’t speak wizard.” “Neither do I. I feel like we’ve failed as parents.” “Nah,” Dad said easily. “Look at him. He’s adorable and knows how to put on his own pants. We did good.”",
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                        "text": "“Michael doesn't flinch. 'You can't know,' he says quietly, 'how much you truly love something until it's gone.' 'That's not fair,' I say as I tremble. 'No one said it would be. He tests you, Benji, and he tests Calliel for a supremely simple reason. You are tested because if you aren't, how could you know what you believe in?' ”",
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                        "text": "“Otter says nothing and as I turn to look at him, he’s watching me, that gold-green shining with that regard that always leaves me breathless. I don’t know what he’s thinking right now. I don’t think I want to know. Are you sure? the voice in my head asks. Are you absolutely sure you don’t want to know?]”",
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                        "text": "“Bear, I think having sand in your butt crack must be really uncomfortable. Maybe you should go change your clothes. You don’t want to catch sand crabs. What’s the point of getting crabs when you weren’t having any fun doing it?”",
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                        "text": "“Time is a river, I've learned. Always moving forward. But for people like me, people who have loved and lost, the river is something we fight. We swim against the current, trying to get back to the way we once were, trying to hold onto anything to keep us from getting swept away. It's exhausting and eventually we tire. Still we push on.”",
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                        "text": "“I’ve never told anyone this, but anytime that I’ve felt sad or alone or angry or upset, I would pray to God to just make you come back. That I would do anything He wanted me to do if only you would walk through my door. You were the only thing that made me feel safe when the earthquakes threatened to break me. I needed you to come home because when you’re not here, I don’t have a home.”",
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                        "text": "“The whole gay thing. You know, I’ve been doing some research about that.” Uh-oh. “Have you?” “Yes.” I wait, but he just stares at me. “And what was the conclusion of your research?” I finally ask, unsure if that’s the smart thing to do. “That there’s absolutely nothing wrong with homosexuality,” he says. “It’s perfectly natural. Anyone who says otherwise is completely irresponsible.”",
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                        "text": "“So while I drove my little and planned his fantasy night of how I was going to give Otter the key to my soul (his words, not mine), I silently panicked and wrote lines of bad poetry. Normally, I am quite adept at writing poems and lyrics to songs I'l never sing, but this stuff was just atrocious. For example: I love you You love me Thank God for that I'm so happy And Ty's personal favorite (which he helped me on): Otter! Otter! Otter! Don't lead cows to slaughter I love you and I know I should've told you soon-a But you didn't buy the dolphin-safe tuna! TY asked me if I got the hidden message in his poem. I told him it was loud and clear.”",
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