---
title: "Best Kinky Friedman Sayings"
description: "Kinky Friedman was an American singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician and Texas Monthly columnist. Browse 165 Kinky Friedman quotes."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b072/author-kinky-friedman-2471.jpg"
---

![Portrait of Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b072/author-kinky-friedman-2471.jpg)

# Kinky Friedman

(1944–2024)   Actor   United States

 **165** quotes in **661** categories

Rate this collection:  ★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

Kinky Friedman was an actor from the United States, best known for *Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned*.

## Quick Facts About Kinky Friedman

Born October 31, 1944

Died June 27, 2024

Nationality United States

Profession Actor

Notable works Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned

## About Kinky Friedman

He described his style after famous satirists Will Rogers and Mark Twain.

##  Quotes by Kinky Friedman · Page 3

> [Remember, the Legislature is the joke, not our campaign.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/remember-the-legislature-is-the-joke-not-our-campaign/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Campaigns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/campaigns/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e45/kinky-friedman-2471_campaigns_remember-the-legislature-is-the-joke-not_682233.png)

> [I believe that Willy Nelson is the hillbilly Dalai Lama.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-believe-that-willy-nelson-is-the-hillbilly-dalai-lama/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f6d/kinky-friedman-2471_believe_i-believe-that-willy-nelson-is-the-hillb_512937.png)

> [We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/we-ve-had-to-be-creative-to-get-on-the-ballot/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Ballot](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ballot/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7b/kinky-friedman-2471_ballot_we-ve-had-to-be-creative-to-get-on-the-b_1834644.png)

> [The Ten Commandments being taken out of the public schools. I want them back.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-ten-commandments-being-taken-out-of-the-public-schools-i-want/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Commandments](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/commandments/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9af/kinky-friedman-2471_commandments_the-ten-commandments-being-taken-out-of_1945487.png)

> [The teachers are getting screwed, blued, and tattooed by the system.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-teachers-are-getting-screwed-blued-and-tattooed-by-the-system/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Education](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/education/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/72f/kinky-friedman-2471_education_the-teachers-are-getting-screwed-blued-a_147418.png)

> [Man's ability to delude himself is infinite.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/man-s-ability-to-delude-himself-is-infinite/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Ability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ability/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d5f/kinky-friedman-2471_ability_man-s-ability-to-delude-himself-is-infin_365264.png)

> [I'm ready for anything. That's probably why it never happens.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-m-ready-for-anything-that-s-probably-why-it-never-happens/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24e/kinky-friedman-2471_happens_i-m-ready-for-anything-that-s-probably-w_1881826.png)

> [There is a difference between who is important and who is significant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/there-is-a-difference-between-who-is-important-and-who-is-significant/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Difference](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/difference/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/065/kinky-friedman-2471_difference_there-is-a-difference-between-who-is-imp_1837846.png)

> [Always beware of people offering you one-time money. That only works in an election year. How are you going to permanently pay…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/always-beware-of-people-offering-you-one-time-money-that-only-works/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Education](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/education/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fbf/kinky-friedman-2471_education_always-beware-of-people-offering-you-one_2002191.png)

> [“The only thing wrong with Southern Baptists was they didn't hold them underwater long enough.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-only-thing-wrong-with-southern-baptists-was-they-didn-t-hold-them/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Baptists](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/baptists/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d2f/kinky-friedman-2471_baptists_the-only-thing-wrong-with-southern-bapti_1383729.png)

> [You have to work at it if you want to be a good smoker. Especially today with all the non-smoking world constantly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/you-have-to-work-at-it-if-you-want-to-be-a-good-smoker-especially/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc4/kinky-friedman-2471_ifs_you-have-to-work-at-it-if-you-want-to-be_2663433.png)

> [I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-rarely-meddled-in-the-cat-s-personal-affairs-and-she-rarely-meddled/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Affair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affair/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bbe/kinky-friedman-2471_affair_i-rarely-meddled-in-the-cat-s-personal-a_227430.png)

> [I believe that voices like Ross Perot, Pat Buchanan, Ralph Nader should be heard. They don't have to be president. Give 'em…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-believe-that-voices-like-ross-perot-pat-buchanan-ralph-nader-should/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d20/kinky-friedman-2471_believe_i-believe-that-voices-like-ross-perot-pa_49551.png)

> [Seventeen publishers rejected the manuscript, at which time we knew we had something pretty hot.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/seventeen-publishers-rejected-the-manuscript-at-which-time-we-knew-we/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/adf/kinky-friedman-2471_hot_seventeen-publishers-rejected-the-manusc_2751700.png)

> [There will be a whole new spirit blowing through Texas. There will be a smile on everybody's face and a chill up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/there-will-be-a-whole-new-spirit-blowing-through-texas-there-will-be/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/kinky-friedman-2471_chill_there-will-be-a-whole-new-spirit-blowing_895526.png)

> [You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/you-have-to-pretend-that-your-life-is-a-financial-pleasure-even-when/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Autographs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/autographs/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44e/kinky-friedman-2471_autographs_you-have-to-pretend-that-your-life-is-a_2516194.png)

> [Remember, I'm not running against Rick Perry; I'm running against apathy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/remember-i-m-not-running-against-rick-perry-i-m-running-against-apathy/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Apathy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/apathy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ef/kinky-friedman-2471_apathy_remember-i-m-not-running-against-rick-pe_2801320.png)

> [“why did i so passionately require the truth? because all great fiction is true”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/why-did-i-so-passionately-require-the-truth-because-all-great-fiction/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Truth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/truth/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e3/kinky-friedman-2471_truth_why-did-i-so-passionately-require-the-tr_1732494.png)

> [I'll tell you right now. I'm for prayer in school.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-ll-tell-you-right-now-i-m-for-prayer-in-school/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Prayer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/prayer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/433/kinky-friedman-2471_prayer_i-ll-tell-you-right-now-i-m-for-prayer-i_2563027.png)

> [It wasn't a healthy attitude, but it wasn't really a healthy world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/it-wasn-t-a-healthy-attitude-but-it-wasn-t-really-a-healthy-world/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Attitude](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/attitude/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/227/kinky-friedman-2471_attitude_it-wasn-t-a-healthy-attitude-but-it-wasn_1890144.png)

> [When I'm governor... I'll be the first governor with a listed telephone number.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/when-i-m-governor-i-ll-be-the-first-governor-with-a-listed-telephone/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d8b/kinky-friedman-2471_governor_when-i-m-governor-i-ll-be-the-first-gove_457781.png)

> [My goal as a young man, to be fat, famous and financially fixed by 50.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/my-goal-as-a-young-man-to-be-fat-famous-and-financially-fixed-by-50/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/853/kinky-friedman-2471_fats_my-goal-as-a-young-man-to-be-fat-famous_2484656.png)

> [You never marry the person you first see 'Casablanca' with.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/you-never-marry-the-person-you-first-see-casablanca-with/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Casablanca](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/casablanca/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0a2/kinky-friedman-2471_casablanca_you-never-marry-the-person-you-first-see_2922402.png)

> [He looked a shade too healthy and nobody likes that. Particularly in New York.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/he-looked-a-shade-too-healthy-and-nobody-likes-that-particularly-in/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Health](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/health/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/40d/kinky-friedman-2471_health_he-looked-a-shade-too-healthy-and-nobody_3100567.png)

> [If you ain't Texan, I ain't got time for you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-you-ain-t-texan-i-ain-t-got-time-for-you/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Texan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/texan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6f3/kinky-friedman-2471_texan_if-you-ain-t-texan-i-ain-t-got-time-for_1067479.png)

> [The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-folks-in-mississippi-are-saying-thank-god-for-texas/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e4/kinky-friedman-2471_folks_the-folks-in-mississippi-are-saying-than_2676975.png)

> [I'll sign anything except bad legislation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-ll-sign-anything-except-bad-legislation/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Legislation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/legislation/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9ba/kinky-friedman-2471_legislation_i-ll-sign-anything-except-bad-legislatio_1276331.png)

> [Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/students-don-t-know-who-mark-twain-was-because-he-wasn-t-on-the-test/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Education](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/education/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1f2/kinky-friedman-2471_education_students-don-t-know-who-mark-twain-was-b_2605660.png)

> [Poly means more than one, and ticks are bloodsucking parasites.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/poly-means-more-than-one-and-ticks-are-bloodsucking-parasites/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Inspirational](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e72/kinky-friedman-2471_inspirational_poly-means-more-than-one-and-ticks-are-b_2145609.png)

> [We're going to make that Lone Star shine again](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/we-re-going-to-make-that-lone-star-shine-again/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Inspirational](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66a/kinky-friedman-2471_inspirational_we-re-going-to-make-that-lone-star-shine_2931198.png)

> [Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/money-can-buy-you-a-fine-dog-but-only-love-can-make-him-wag-his-tail/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Animal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/animal/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c3/kinky-friedman-2471_animal_money-can-buy-you-a-fine-dog-but-only-lo_1669529.png)

> [The distance between the limousine and the gutter is a short one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-distance-between-the-limousine-and-the-gutter-is-a-short-one/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da8/kinky-friedman-2471_distance_the-distance-between-the-limousine-and-t_296027.png)

> [ I want to be governor \[of Texas\] because I need the closet space. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-want-to-be-governor-of-texas-because-i-need-the-closet-space/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dee/kinky-friedman-2471_closets_i-want-to-be-governor-of-texas-because-i_189106.png)

> [Now I have a cat. Well, that's not quite accurate. A cat and I have each other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/now-i-have-a-cat-well-that-s-not-quite-accurate-a-cat-and-i-have-each/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/97d/kinky-friedman-2471_accurate_now-i-have-a-cat-well-that-s-not-quite-a_1991999.png)

> [I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-admit-i-was-drinking-a-guinness-but-i-did-not-swallow/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Drinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/drinking/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64c/kinky-friedman-2471_drinking_i-admit-i-was-drinking-a-guinness-but-i_2711658.png)

> [If you're going to be an artist, you need to be an original.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-you-re-going-to-be-an-artist-you-need-to-be-an-original/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Art](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/art/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/634/kinky-friedman-2471_art_if-you-re-going-to-be-an-artist-you-need_1092597.png)

> [We were a country band with a social conscience.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/we-were-a-country-band-with-a-social-conscience/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fd/kinky-friedman-2471_band_we-were-a-country-band-with-a-social-con_3182057.png)

> [There are more inspirational people in music than there are in politics.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/there-are-more-inspirational-people-in-music-than-there-are-in/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Inspirational](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7f/kinky-friedman-2471_inspirational_there-are-more-inspirational-people-in-m_2635032.png)

> [God created whiskey to keep the Irish from taking over the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/god-created-whiskey-to-keep-the-irish-from-taking-over-the-world/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Inspirational](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f8f/kinky-friedman-2471_inspirational_god-created-whiskey-to-keep-the-irish-fr_142770.png)

> [Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/musicians-can-run-this-state-better-than-politicians-we-won-t-get-a/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c3a/kinky-friedman-2471_done_musicians-can-run-this-state-better-than_2382409.png)

## Kinky Friedman by topic

[People (21)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/kinky-friedman/) [Texas (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/texas/kinky-friedman/) [Politics (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/politics/kinky-friedman/) [Inspirational (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/kinky-friedman/) [Love (13)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/kinky-friedman/) [World (11)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/kinky-friedman/) [Life (10)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/kinky-friedman/)

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