---
title: "Best Kinky Friedman Quotes"
description: "Kinky Friedman was an American singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician and Texas Monthly columnist. Browse 165 Kinky Friedman quotes."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b072/author-kinky-friedman-2471.jpg"
---

![Portrait of Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b072/author-kinky-friedman-2471.jpg)

# Kinky Friedman

(1944–2024)   Actor   United States

 **165** quotes in **661** categories

Rate this collection:  ★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

Kinky Friedman was an actor from the United States, best known for *Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned*.

## Quick Facts About Kinky Friedman

Born October 31, 1944

Died June 27, 2024

Nationality United States

Profession Actor

Notable works Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned

## About Kinky Friedman

He described his style after famous satirists Will Rogers and Mark Twain.

##  Quotes by Kinky Friedman · Page 2

> [I don't apologize to people with an agenda.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-don-t-apologize-to-people-with-an-agenda/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93e/kinky-friedman-2471_agenda_i-don-t-apologize-to-people-with-an-agen_1727449.png)

> [Young people are the key to this election.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/young-people-are-the-key-to-this-election/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Democracy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/democracy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a60/kinky-friedman-2471_democracy_young-people-are-the-key-to-this-electio_2773219.png)

> [No matter where you go, you always see yourself in the rearview mirror.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/no-matter-where-you-go-you-always-see-yourself-in-the-rearview-mirror/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/09c/kinky-friedman-2471_matter_no-matter-where-you-go-you-always-see-yo_2148918.png)

> [If Jesus Christ had run as an independent, Rick Perry would have beat him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-jesus-christ-had-run-as-an-independent-rick-perry-would-have-beat/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/kinky-friedman-2471_beats_if-jesus-christ-had-run-as-an-independen_2008134.png)

> [You struggle with your demons and you conquer them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/you-struggle-with-your-demons-and-you-conquer-them/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Adversity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/adversity/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/037/kinky-friedman-2471_adversity_you-struggle-with-your-demons-and-you-co_2436721.png)

> [They probably would've taken Jesus if he hadn't been nailed down.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/they-probably-would-ve-taken-jesus-if-he-hadn-t-been-nailed-down/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7d8/kinky-friedman-2471_ifs_they-probably-would-ve-taken-jesus-if-he_988453.png)

> [An editor's job is to take something great and make it good.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/an-editor-s-job-is-to-take-something-great-and-make-it-good/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f25/kinky-friedman-2471_editor_an-editor-s-job-is-to-take-something-gre_1895954.png)

> [Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/remember-y-all-is-singular-all-y-all-is-plural-all-y-all-s-is-plural/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a1/kinky-friedman-2471_plural_remember-y-all-is-singular-all-y-all-is_572400.png)

> [Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/politics-is-the-only-field-in-which-the-more-experience-you-have-the/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Experience](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/experience/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/74d/kinky-friedman-2471_experience_politics-is-the-only-field-in-which-the_1225961.png)

> [If Willie Nelson had been Rosa Parks, there never would have been a civil rights movement in this country, because he refuses…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-willie-nelson-had-been-rosa-parks-there-never-would-have-been-a/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/kinky-friedman-2471_bus_if-willie-nelson-had-been-rosa-parks-the_2983412.png)

> [Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independents, by the way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/yes-i-m-a-judeo-christian-jesus-and-moses-are-in-my-heart-and-both-of/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Christian](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/christian/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f5b/kinky-friedman-2471_christian_yes-i-m-a-judeo-christian-jesus-and-mose_2293759.png)

> [“He looked like an accountant or a serial-killer type. Definitely one of the service industries.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/he-looked-like-an-accountant-or-a-serial-killer-type-definitely-one/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Serial killer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/serial-killer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddc/kinky-friedman-2471_serial-killer_he-looked-like-an-accountant-or-a-serial_2176656.png)

> [If you have the choice between humble and cocky, go with cocky. There's always time to be humble later, once you've been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-you-have-the-choice-between-humble-and-cocky-go-with-cocky-there-s/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa6/kinky-friedman-2471_be-humble_if-you-have-the-choice-between-humble-an_2264048.png)

> [On the whole I prefer cats to women because cats seldom if ever use the word 'relationship'.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/on-the-whole-i-prefer-cats-to-women-because-cats-seldom-if-ever-use/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Cat](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cat/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9bc/kinky-friedman-2471_cat_on-the-whole-i-prefer-cats-to-women-beca_202703.png)

> [You don't accomplish much by swimming with the mainstream. Hell, a dead fish can do that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/you-don-t-accomplish-much-by-swimming-with-the-mainstream-hell-a-dead/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/890/kinky-friedman-2471_accomplish_you-don-t-accomplish-much-by-swimming-wi_1725432.png)

> [This system is really broken. No Child Left Behind has really failed and the only way to solve education is to leave…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/this-system-is-really-broken-no-child-left-behind-has-really-failed/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c69/kinky-friedman-2471_behinds_this-system-is-really-broken-no-child-le_1361698.png)

> [“In April 1933, Willie's mother, Myrle, gave birth to him in a manger somewhere along the old highway between Waco & Dallas.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/in-april-1933-willie-s-mother-myrle-gave-birth-to-him-in-a-manger/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Management](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/management/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/999/kinky-friedman-2471_management_in-april-1933-willie-s-mother-myrle-gave_2408821.png)

> [I'm also for gay marriage, because I say they have every right to be just as miserable as the rest of us.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-m-also-for-gay-marriage-because-i-say-they-have-every-right-to-be/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/807/kinky-friedman-2471_adopting_i-m-also-for-gay-marriage-because-i-say_2465822.jpg)

> [That's the government. Having been a politician and a musician, I can tell you which one is a higher calling. If musicians…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/that-s-the-government-having-been-a-politician-and-a-musician-i-can/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9da/kinky-friedman-2471_calling_that-s-the-government-having-been-a-poli_97410.png)

> [My three favorite travel writers of all time are Robert Louis Stevenson, Graham Greene, and Chuck Thompson. Smile When You're Lying not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/my-three-favorite-travel-writers-of-all-time-are-robert-louis/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db3/kinky-friedman-2471_all-time_my-three-favorite-travel-writers-of-all_1686136.png)

> [People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/people-may-surprise-you-with-unexpected-kindness-dogs-have-a-depth-of/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Blessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blessing/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/118/kinky-friedman-2471_blessing_people-may-surprise-you-with-unexpected_222429.png)

> [This is called "spiritual lifting." It's not heavy lifting. The governor of Texas should not be confused with Arnold Schwarzenegger. That's a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/this-is-called-spiritual-lifting-it-s-not-heavy-lifting-the-governor/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/10e/kinky-friedman-2471_arnold-schwarzenegge_this-is-called-spiritual-lifting-it-s-no_2485589.png)

> [“We went into Bennie's, where Ratso bought all three newspapers: the Post, which I always read and Ratso hated, The New York…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/we-went-into-bennie-s-where-ratso-bought-all-three-newspapers-the/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d42/kinky-friedman-2471_alamo_we-went-into-bennie-s-where-ratso-bought_1774097.png)

> [But the most dangerous thing in the world in the world is to run the risk of waking up one morning and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/but-the-most-dangerous-thing-in-the-world-in-the-world-is-to-run-the/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3b8/kinky-friedman-2471_dangerous_but-the-most-dangerous-thing-in-the-worl_2108587.png)

> [I don't apologize to people who try to intimidate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-don-t-apologize-to-people-who-try-to-intimidate/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/87b/kinky-friedman-2471_apologize_i-don-t-apologize-to-people-who-try-to-i_826970.png)

> [Well, I hate to be the one to take the flyswatter to Tinker Bell, but...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/well-i-hate-to-be-the-one-to-take-the-flyswatter-to-tinker-bell-but/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Bells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bells/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/285/kinky-friedman-2471_bells_well-i-hate-to-be-the-one-to-take-the-fl_430667.png)

> [Always respect your superiors, if you have any.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/always-respect-your-superiors-if-you-have-any/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Respect](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/respect/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bde/kinky-friedman-2471_respect_always-respect-your-superiors-if-you-hav_293532.png)

> [William Bennett is my patron saint, one of them. Redd Foxx is another.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/william-bennett-is-my-patron-saint-one-of-them-redd-foxx-is-another/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/794/kinky-friedman-2471_bennett_william-bennett-is-my-patron-saint-one-o_463129.png)

> [The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-first-thing-i-ll-do-if-elected-is-demand-a-recount/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Demand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/demand/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/151/kinky-friedman-2471_demand_the-first-thing-i-ll-do-if-elected-is-de_1067000.png)

> [What has six balls and screws Texans? The Texas Lottery.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/what-has-six-balls-and-screws-texans-the-texas-lottery/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/008/kinky-friedman-2471_balls_what-has-six-balls-and-screws-texans-the_2710370.png)

> [The main health hazard in the world today is people who don't love themselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/the-main-health-hazard-in-the-world-today-is-people-who-don-t-love/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/kinky-friedman-2471_hazards_the-main-health-hazard-in-the-world-toda_2736758.png)

> [True love usually results in a hostage situation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/true-love-usually-results-in-a-hostage-situation/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fcb/kinky-friedman-2471_hostage_true-love-usually-results-in-a-hostage-s_1132950.png)

> [I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-m-too-young-for-medicare-and-too-old-for-women-to-care/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Care](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/care/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/777/kinky-friedman-2471_care_i-m-too-young-for-medicare-and-too-old-f_108477.png)

> [If you're lookin' for a helpin' hand, try the one at the end of your arm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-you-re-lookin-for-a-helpin-hand-try-the-one-at-the-end-of-your-arm/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/771/kinky-friedman-2471_arms_if-you-re-lookin-for-a-helpin-hand-try-t_609503.png)

> [When you record something, you never know who's going to hear it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/when-you-record-something-you-never-know-who-s-going-to-hear-it/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18d/kinky-friedman-2471_hear_when-you-record-something-you-never-know_789133.png)

> [I was so high, I needed a stepladder to scratch my own ass.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-was-so-high-i-needed-a-stepladder-to-scratch-my-own-ass/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/kinky-friedman-2471_ass_i-was-so-high-i-needed-a-stepladder-to-s_2612036.png)

> [I admit to drinking it, but I did not swallow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-admit-to-drinking-it-but-i-did-not-swallow/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/55a/kinky-friedman-2471_admit_i-admit-to-drinking-it-but-i-did-not-swa_2264875.png)

> [I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/i-d-felt-that-a-man-without-a-woman-was-like-a-neck-without-a-pain/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/937/kinky-friedman-2471_felt_i-d-felt-that-a-man-without-a-woman-was_2045506.png)

> [Sometimes performing someone else's song is more difficult than writing your own.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/sometimes-performing-someone-else-s-song-is-more-difficult-than/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a52/kinky-friedman-2471_difficult_sometimes-performing-someone-else-s-song_687295.png)

> [If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kinky-friedman/if-you-re-paranoid-long-enough-sooner-or-later-you-re-gonna-be-right/)

[Kinky Friedman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kinky-friedman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f5a/kinky-friedman-2471_enough_if-you-re-paranoid-long-enough-sooner-or_2431366.png)

## Kinky Friedman by topic

[People (21)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/kinky-friedman/) [Texas (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/texas/kinky-friedman/) [Politics (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/politics/kinky-friedman/) [Inspirational (14)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational/kinky-friedman/) [Love (13)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/kinky-friedman/) [World (11)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/kinky-friedman/) [Life (10)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/kinky-friedman/)

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                        "text": "This system is really broken. No Child Left Behind has really failed and the only way to solve education is to leave one governor behind.",
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                        "text": "I'm also for gay marriage, because I say they have every right to be just as miserable as the rest of us. Love is bigger than government. And Texas, by the way, has a very progressive law about gay couples adopting kids. We just won't let them get married. So that's not common sense.",
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                        "text": "That's the government. Having been a politician and a musician, I can tell you which one is a higher calling. If musicians ran the country, it would be a much different place. We wouldn't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'd work late.",
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                        "text": "Well, I hate to be the one to take the flyswatter to Tinker Bell, but...",
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                        "text": "William Bennett is my patron saint, one of them. Redd Foxx is another.",
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                        "text": "What has six balls and screws Texans? The Texas Lottery.",
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