--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You didn’t answer my question. I asked…" description: "\"“You didn’t answer my question. I asked you about being in love. You said what it was like when your wife went away.” Martin sat down again. How young ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/235/audrey-niffenegger-1298_love_you-didn-t-answer-my-question-i-asked-yo_1106526.jpg" --- # You didn’t answer my question. I asked you about being in… ![“You didn’t answer my question. I asked you about being in love. You said what it was like when your wife went away.” Martin sat down again. How young she is. When we were that young we invented the world, no one could tell us a thing. Julia stood with her hands clenched, as though she wanted to…” quote by Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/235/audrey-niffenegger-1298_love_you-didn-t-answer-my-question-i-asked-yo_1106526.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/235/audrey-niffenegger-1298_love_you-didn-t-answer-my-question-i-asked-yo_1106526.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/235/audrey-niffenegger-1298_love_you-didn-t-answer-my-question-i-asked-yo_1106526.jpg) > ““You didn’t answer my question. I asked you about being in love. You said what it was like when your wife went away.” Martin sat down again. How young she is. When we were that young we invented the world, no one could tell us a thing. Julia stood with her hands clenched, as though she wanted to pound an answer out of him. “Being in love is…anxious,” he said. “Wanting to please, worrying that she will see me as I really am. But wanting to be known. That is…you’re naked, moaning in the dark, no dignity at all…I wanted her to see me and to love me even though she knew everything I am, and I knew her. Now she’s gone, and my knowledge is incomplete. So all day I imagine what she is doing, what she says and who she talks to, how she looks. I try to supply the missing hours, and it gets harder as they pile up, all the time she’s been gone. I have to imagine. I don’t know, really. I don’t know any more.”” [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. He describes love as a mix of vulnerability, yearning, and anxiety, highlighting the difficulty of fully knowing another. **In simple terms:** Love is anxious, vulnerable, and yearning. Key Takeaway Embrace love’s uncertainty and openness. Themes love vulnerability anxiety identity memory Mood emotional introspective poetic Type literary psychological When to use this quote - relationship counseling - personal reflection - creative writing - therapeutic practice Key Concepts existential intimacy psychology of attachment temporal longing Questions to Reflect On - How does uncertainty shape intimacy? - Can love thrive without complete understanding? A Different Perspective Love’s intensity can cause emotional instability and obsessive thoughts. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) ## Related quotes > [“I asked her if she’d give me all her love, and she flatly said no. 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That tingling inside was gone and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bat-for-lashes/we-walked-arm-in-arm-but-i-didn-t-feel-his-touch-a-desire-i-d-first/) [Bat For Lashes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bat-for-lashes/) > [“If you really love someone. You wouldn't hide them. You would be proud to let the whole world know that you have feelings for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-anthony-burkett/if-you-really-love-someone-you-wouldn-t-hide-them-you-would-be-proud/) [Jonathan Anthony Burkett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-anthony-burkett/) ## More by Audrey Niffenegger > [But you know: you know that if I could have stayed, if I could have gone on, that I would have clutched every second:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/but-you-know-you-know-that-if-i-could-have-stayed-if-i-could-have/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [I look at him, look at the book, remember, this book, this moment, the first book I ever loved](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/i-look-at-him-look-at-the-book-remember-this-book-this-moment-the/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“When I was young I didn't understand, but now, I know, how absence can be present, like a damaged nerve, like a dark bird.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/when-i-was-young-i-didn-t-understand-but-now-i-know-how-absence-can/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [Everything seems simple until you think about it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/everything-seems-simple-until-you-think-about-it/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [I place my hands over her ears and tip her head back, and kiss her, and try to put my heart into hers, for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/i-place-my-hands-over-her-ears-and-tip-her-head-back-and-kiss-her-and/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“Sister Carmelita says animals don't have souls" "Of course animals have souls, where did she get that idea?" 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He says…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/he-said-something-interesting-he-said-that-he-thinks-there-is-only/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“Dead is the most alone you can be.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/dead-is-the-most-alone-you-can-be/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [What are you doing?" Nothing. Breaking and entering. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/what-are-you-doing-nothing-breaking-and-entering-pay-no-attention-to/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [I won't ever leave you, even though you're always leaving me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/i-won-t-ever-leave-you-even-though-you-re-always-leaving-me/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“It seems like we're going to collide, and we laugh, and laugh, and nothing can ever be sad, no one can be lost, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/it-seems-like-we-re-going-to-collide-and-we-laugh-and-laugh-and/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“We were royally miserable together.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/we-were-royally-miserable-together/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [“No.” Valentina closed her eyes. 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Julia stood with her hands clenched, as though she wanted to pound an answer out of him. “Being in love is…anxious,” he said. “Wanting to please, worrying that she will see me as I really am. But wanting to be known. That is…you’re naked, moaning in the dark, no dignity at all…I wanted her to see me and to love me even though she knew everything I am, and I knew her. Now she’s gone, and my knowledge is incomplete. So all day I imagine what she is doing, what she says and who she talks to, how she looks. I try to supply the missing hours, and it gets harder as they pile up, all the time she’s been gone. I have to imagine. I don’t know, really. 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