--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The problem with telling yourself you…" description: "\"“The problem with telling yourself you didn't want something, Sebastian discovered, was that soon you desired it even more.”\" — Ashley March" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg" --- # The problem with telling yourself you didn't want… ![“The problem with telling yourself you didn't want something, Sebastian discovered, was that soon you desired it even more.” quote by Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg) > ““The problem with telling yourself you didn't want something, Sebastian discovered, was that soon you desired it even more.”” [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Denial of desire intensifies longing, making the object more alluring. **In simple terms:** Denial fuels desire. Key Takeaway Recognize and address hidden cravings. Themes desire denial psychology Mood reflective cautionary Type literary psychological When to use this quote - relationship dynamics - goal setting - habit formation Key Concepts cognitive dissonance self‑deception Questions to Reflect On - What desires are you suppressing? - How does denial affect decision making? A Different Perspective Denial can lead to self‑sabotage. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet ## Related quotes > [“I don't plan to be a gentleman about this Victoria. 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The desire of reading doesn’t cease once a book is read, however extraordinary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-dubois/desire-may-cease-once-the-desired-person-or-object-is-acquired-the/) [Gabrielle Dubois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-dubois/) > [I've got a feeling that with the best coppers - and in fact the best people in any field of work - what sets…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ken-stott/i-ve-got-a-feeling-that-with-the-best-coppers-and-in-fact-the-best/) [Ken Stott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ken-stott/) > [As long as humans have existed, we have always desired to live longer. Every society, every religion, every culture. Of course, they all failed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/s-jay-olshansky/as-long-as-humans-have-existed-we-have-always-desired-to-live-longer/) [S. Jay Olshansky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/s-jay-olshansky/) > [I found that what I had desired all my life was not to live - if what others are doing is called living -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-miller/i-found-that-what-i-had-desired-all-my-life-was-not-to-live-if-what/) [Henry Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-miller/) > [Friendship is a relationship that is given to few, but desired by all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/friendship-is-a-relationship-that-is-given-to-few-but-desired-by-all/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [What must that be like? To be admired before you’ve even said a word, to be desired two or three hundred times a day…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/what-must-that-be-like-to-be-admired-before-you-ve-even-said-a-word/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [I'm sorry, I guess my company leaves a lot to be desired.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicholas-sparks/i-m-sorry-i-guess-my-company-leaves-a-lot-to-be-desired/) [Nicholas Sparks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicholas-sparks/) > [The US wished things to turn out as they did, and worked to bring this about. The department of state desired that the UN…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-patrick-moynihan/the-us-wished-things-to-turn-out-as-they-did-and-worked-to-bring-this/) [Daniel Patrick Moynihan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-patrick-moynihan/) > [“When a long-desired baby is born, what joy! More happiness than we find in sex, more than we take in success, revenge, or wealth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-hall/when-a-long-desired-baby-is-born-what-joy-more-happiness-than-we-find/) [Donald Hall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-hall/) > [I feel in me the vocation of the Priest. I have the vocation of the Apostle. Martyrdom was the dream of my youth, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/therese-of-lisieux/i-feel-in-me-the-vocation-of-the-priest-i-have-the-vocation-of-the/) [Therese of Lisieux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/therese-of-lisieux/) > [Peace, above all things, is to be desired, but blood must sometimes be spilled to obtain it on equable and lasting terms.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-jackson/peace-above-all-things-is-to-be-desired-but-blood-must-sometimes-be/) [Andrew Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-jackson/) ## More by Ashley March > [“Leah tilted her chin and smiled. “I thought we disliked each other.” “Oh, we do,” he said, taking another sip. “I detest you quite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/leah-tilted-her-chin-and-smiled-i-thought-we-disliked-each-other-oh/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“It’s not just your beauty—you’ve always had that. It’s the way you believe in yourself, the way you make everyone around you believe there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/it-s-not-just-your-beauty-you-ve-always-had-that-it-s-the-way-you/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“And now I believe I shall put my head on you,” he announced. “The room has started to spin, and it’s been a very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/and-now-i-believe-i-shall-put-my-head-on-you-he-announced-the-room/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“Oh? And what was I to say? I beg your pardon, Lord Wriothesly, but your wife seems to have acquired a distinct liking for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/oh-and-what-was-i-to-say-i-beg-your-pardon-lord-wriothesly-but-your/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“But that isn't the strangest part," Fallon said. He peered down the corridor, as if to make sure Philip wasn't nearby. Then he turned…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/but-that-isn-t-the-strangest-part-fallon-said-he-peered-down-the/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“You’re very handsome tonight, my lord.” “What’s this? A compliment from the lovely widow?” “A mere observation.” “Why do I suspect that you had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/you-re-very-handsome-tonight-my-lord-what-s-this-a-compliment-from/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“Sebastian closed his eyes, his chin sinking toward his chest. How long he’d been trapped by those words, afraid to scare her away. How…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/sebastian-closed-his-eyes-his-chin-sinking-toward-his-chest-how-long/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) > [“Everything you do seduces me. All you need to do is breathe and I would do anything for you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/everything-you-do-seduces-me-all-you-need-to-do-is-breathe-and-i/) [Ashley March](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) [Explore all 9 Ashley March quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/) ## More Desired quotes > [Peace, above all things, is to be desired, but blood must sometimes be spilled to obtain it on equable and lasting terms.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-jackson/peace-above-all-things-is-to-be-desired-but-blood-must-sometimes-be/) [Andrew Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-jackson/) > [I feel in me the vocation of the Priest. I have the vocation of the Apostle. 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The department of state desired that the UN…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-patrick-moynihan/the-us-wished-things-to-turn-out-as-they-did-and-worked-to-bring-this/) [Daniel Patrick Moynihan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-patrick-moynihan/) > [I'm sorry, I guess my company leaves a lot to be desired.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicholas-sparks/i-m-sorry-i-guess-my-company-leaves-a-lot-to-be-desired/) [Nicholas Sparks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicholas-sparks/) > [What must that be like? To be admired before you’ve even said a word, to be desired two or three hundred times a day…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/what-must-that-be-like-to-be-admired-before-you-ve-even-said-a-word/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [Friendship is a relationship that is given to few, but desired by all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/friendship-is-a-relationship-that-is-given-to-few-but-desired-by-all/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I found that what I had desired all my life was not to live - if what others are doing is called living -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-miller/i-found-that-what-i-had-desired-all-my-life-was-not-to-live-if-what/) [Henry Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-miller/) > [As long as humans have existed, we have always desired to live longer. Every society, every religion, every culture. Of course, they all failed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/s-jay-olshansky/as-long-as-humans-have-existed-we-have-always-desired-to-live-longer/) [S. Jay Olshansky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/s-jay-olshansky/) > [I've got a feeling that with the best coppers - and in fact the best people in any field of work - what sets…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ken-stott/i-ve-got-a-feeling-that-with-the-best-coppers-and-in-fact-the-best/) [Ken Stott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ken-stott/) > [“Desire may cease once the desired person or object is acquired. The desire of reading doesn’t cease once a book is read, however extraordinary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-dubois/desire-may-cease-once-the-desired-person-or-object-is-acquired-the/) [Gabrielle Dubois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-dubois/) > [The first right of every child is to be wanted, to be desired, to be planned for with an intensity of love that gives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-sanger/the-first-right-of-every-child-is-to-be-wanted-to-be-desired-to-be/) [Margaret Sanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-sanger/) > [Terror works like a musical composition, so many instruments, all in tune, playing perfectly together to create their desired effect. Sorrow and horror and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-gibbs/terror-works-like-a-musical-composition-so-many-instruments-all-in/) [Nancy Gibbs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-gibbs/) > [Let's face it: fitness is boring. But it's critical to be extremely dedicated to whatever you decide to take up to achieve a desired…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harbhajan-singh/let-s-face-it-fitness-is-boring-but-it-s-critical-to-be-extremely/) [Harbhajan Singh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harbhajan-singh/) > [“Sitting here, and thus, she had attained to a state which she could never have desired, not even conceived. And being so unforeseen, so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-townsend-warner/sitting-here-and-thus-she-had-attained-to-a-state-which-she-could/) [Sylvia Townsend Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-townsend-warner/) Browse all 117 Desired quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“The problem with telling yourself you didn't want something, Sebastian discovered, was that soon you desired it even more.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Ashley March" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-didn-t-want-something-sebastian/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Desired" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-didn-t-want-something-sebastian/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fae/ashley-march-42459_quote_the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-di_2082658.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The problem with telling yourself you didn't want something, Sebastian discovered, was that soon you desired…” — Ashley March", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Ashley March", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-march/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“The problem with telling yourself you...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-didn-t-want-something-sebastian/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-march/the-problem-with-telling-yourself-you-didn-t-want-something-sebastian/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```