--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I do not know how it comes about, but if…" description: "\"I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite a man every day and you are engaged in fighting him, you cannot help getting a liking for him..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png" --- # I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite… ![“I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite a man every day and you are engaged in fighting him, you cannot help getting a liking for him whether he deserves it or not.” quote by Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png) > “I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite a man every day and you are engaged in fighting him, you cannot help getting a liking for him whether he deserves it or not.” [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Regular close interaction with an opponent can foster unexpected respect, regardless of merit **In simple terms:** Frequent conflict can create unwanted affection Key Takeaway Beware of bias from repeated exposure Themes psychology relationships bias Mood reflective cautious Type advice observational When to use this quote - teamwork - negotiations - conflict resolution - leadership Key Concepts cognitive dissonance in-group favoritism Questions to Reflect On - How does familiarity affect your judgments? - Can you separate personal feelings from professional assessment? A Different Perspective Respect may be undeserved if based solely on familiarity ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Deserve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/deserve/) [Engaged](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/engaged/) [Every day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/every-day/) [Fighting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fighting/) [Getting Liking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/getting-liking-2178030/) [Helping](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/helping/) [Ifs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/) [Know how](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/know-how/) [Knows](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/knows/) [Liking Deserves](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/liking-deserves-2178029/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) [Opposite Man](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/opposite-man-2178027/) [Opposites](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/opposites/) [Sit Opposite](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sit-opposite-2178028/) [Wrestling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wrestling/) ## Related quotes > [What I admire most in men - To sit opposite a mirror at dinner and not look in it](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-harding-davis/what-i-admire-most-in-men-to-sit-opposite-a-mirror-at-dinner-and-not/) [Richard Harding Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-harding-davis/) > [It is necessary to recover the primeval force of the shock taking place at the moment when opposite a man (the viewer) there stood…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tadeusz-kantor/it-is-necessary-to-recover-the-primeval-force-of-the-shock-taking/) [Tadeusz Kantor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tadeusz-kantor/) > [A man who wishes to better himself is opposite a man who is better.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-man-who-wishes-to-better-himself-is-opposite-a-man-who-is-better/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Woman is the opposite, the ‘other’ of man: she is non-man, defective man, assigned a chiefly negative value in relation to the male first…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-eagleton/woman-is-the-opposite-the-other-of-man-she-is-non-man-defective-man/) [Terry Eagleton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-eagleton/) > [When fans know they are being rewarded, they are more engaged.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chamillionaire/when-fans-know-they-are-being-rewarded-they-are-more-engaged/) [Chamillionaire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chamillionaire/) > [When God overcomes our difficulties for us, we have the assurance that we are engaged in His work and not our own](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-muller/when-god-overcomes-our-difficulties-for-us-we-have-the-assurance-that/) [George Muller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-muller/) > [I don’t know, I don’t know that I’m missing anything. I just think too much sometimes. Sometimes I’m even happy because I’m so engaged…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeff-buckley/i-don-t-know-i-don-t-know-that-i-m-missing-anything-i-just-think-too/) [Jeff Buckley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeff-buckley/) > [If you've been courting someone for a long time, what's the point in being engaged an additional 2 or 3 years?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-ve-been-courting-someone-for-a-long-time-what-s-the-point-in/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I was very engaged by the folk music movement.Bob Dylan; Joan Baez; Peter, Paul and Mary. 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If the husband be engaged in a seditious club, or drinks mysterious healths, or be frugal…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-addison/every-wife-ought-to-answer-for-her-man-if-the-husband-be-engaged-in-a/) [Joseph Addison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-addison/) > [“The burn is my girlfriend, failure is my ex. I'm married to the track and engaged to success.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-bramble/the-burn-is-my-girlfriend-failure-is-my-ex-i-m-married-to-the-track/) [Andre Bramble](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-bramble/) > [Let us thank God heartily as often as we pray that we have His Spirit in us to teach us to pray. Thanksgiving will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-murray/let-us-thank-god-heartily-as-often-as-we-pray-that-we-have-his-spirit/) [Andy Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-murray/) > [Gambling has held human beings in thrall for millennia. It has been engaged in everywhere, from the dregs of society to the most respectable…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-l-bernstein/gambling-has-held-human-beings-in-thrall-for-millennia-it-has-been/) [Peter L. Bernstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-l-bernstein/) ## More by Arthur Balfour > [Our Scottish theory ... is that every country has need of Scotchmen, but that Scotland has no need of the citizens of any other country.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/our-scottish-theory-is-that-every-country-has-need-of-scotchmen-but/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [ He \[A. J. Balfour\] was eminently one of the Cole Porter school of famous men, who only fell to rise again. Picking himself up… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/he-a-j-balfour-was-eminently-one-of-the-cole-porter-school-of-famous/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [In politics nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/in-politics-nothing-matters-very-much-and-few-things-matter-at-all/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [The General Strike has taught the working class more in four days than years of talking could have done.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/the-general-strike-has-taught-the-working-class-more-in-four-days/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [The power of authority is never more subtle and effective than when it produces a psychological atmosphere or climate favorable to the life of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/the-power-of-authority-is-never-more-subtle-and-effective-than-when/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [Kant, as we all know, compared moral law to the starry heavens, and found them both sublime. On the naturalistic hypothesis we should rather…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/kant-as-we-all-know-compared-moral-law-to-the-starry-heavens-and/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [“We survey the past, and see that its history is of blood and tears, of helpless blundering, of wild revolt, of stupid acquiescence, of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/we-survey-the-past-and-see-that-its-history-is-of-blood-and-tears-of/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [I never forgive, but I always forget.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-never-forgive-but-i-always-forget/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [“Nothing matters very much and most things don't matter at all.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/nothing-matters-very-much-and-most-things-don-t-matter-at-all/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [Biography should be written by an acute enemy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/biography-should-be-written-by-an-acute-enemy/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [I do not stare at a gentleman in distress.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-do-not-stare-at-a-gentleman-in-distress/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/nothing-matters-very-much-and-few-things-matter-at-all/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [In effort Happiness idleness life pleasure superstition support trouble work The superstition that all our hours of work are a minus quantity in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/in-effort-happiness-idleness-life-pleasure-superstition-support/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [Science preceded the theory of science, and is independent of it. Science preceded naturalism, and will survive it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/science-preceded-the-theory-of-science-and-is-independent-of-it/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) > [Ask with urgency and passion.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/ask-with-urgency-and-passion/) [Arthur Balfour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) [Explore all 42 Arthur Balfour quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/) ## More Deserve quotes > [If you are well-mannered towards those whose views are similar to yours, you may be said to exhibit a fairly good character. But, if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-are-well-mannered-towards-those-whose-views-are-similar-to/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [ Vote for Donald Trump. You're going to see something and you'll be so happy, you'll be so thrilled. This \[presidential\] election is about every… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-trump/vote-for-donald-trump-you-re-going-to-see-something-and-you-ll-be-so/) [Donald Trump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-trump/) > [I am a millionaire today and my wife deserves all of the credit. Before I met her I was a multi-millionaire.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chi-chi-rodriguez/i-am-a-millionaire-today-and-my-wife-deserves-all-of-the-credit/) [Chi Chi Rodriguez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chi-chi-rodriguez/) > [There is a way to be a woman, ask for what we deserve and be able to negotiate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracee-ellis-ross/there-is-a-way-to-be-a-woman-ask-for-what-we-deserve-and-be-able-to/) [Tracee Ellis Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tracee-ellis-ross/) > [If every nation gets the government it deserves, every generation writes the history which corresponds with its view of the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-janeway/if-every-nation-gets-the-government-it-deserves-every-generation/) [Elizabeth Janeway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-janeway/) > [I used to hurt so badly that I'd ask God why, what have I done to deserve any of this? I feel now He…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eden-phillpotts/i-used-to-hurt-so-badly-that-i-d-ask-god-why-what-have-i-done-to/) [Eden Phillpotts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eden-phillpotts/) > [I am encouraged President Obama now says he will fulfill his constitutional obligation to seek authorization for any potential military action in Syria. This…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rand-paul/i-am-encouraged-president-obama-now-says-he-will-fulfill-his/) [Rand Paul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rand-paul/) > [My prayer to the Lord every day, is this-I have been a great sinner. I do not deserve Heaven. Let me stay here.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andres-segovia/my-prayer-to-the-lord-every-day-is-this-i-have-been-a-great-sinner-i/) [Andres Segovia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andres-segovia/) > [Every girl deserves a guy who'll prove to her that not all guys are the same, a guy who'll love her just the way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lil-wayne/every-girl-deserves-a-guy-who-ll-prove-to-her-that-not-all-guys-are/) [Lil Wayne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lil-wayne/) > [If you are a white male, you don't deserve to live. You are a cancer, you're a disease, white males have never contributed anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noel-ignatiev/if-you-are-a-white-male-you-don-t-deserve-to-live-you-are-a-cancer/) [Noel Ignatiev](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noel-ignatiev/) > [Singaporeans like Mr. Alfian Sa'at do not deserve to be admonished in Parliament on the basis of a selective reading of their works.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pritam-singh/singaporeans-like-mr-alfian-sa-at-do-not-deserve-to-be-admonished-in/) [Pritam Singh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pritam-singh/) > [Use every man according to his desert and who should 'scape whipping? Use them after your own honor and dignity, the less they deserve…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/use-every-man-according-to-his-desert-and-who-should-scape-whipping/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [“We should not elevate anyone higher than our own heart. 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Sometimes they don't deserve it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rylan-clark-neal/i-am-constantly-nice-to-people-sometimes-they-don-t-deserve-it/) [Rylan Clark-Neal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rylan-clark-neal/) [Browse all 4,764 Deserve quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/deserve/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite a man every day and you are engaged in fighting him, you cannot help getting a liking for him whether he deserves it or not.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Arthur Balfour" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if-you-sit-opposite-a-man-every/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Deserve" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if-you-sit-opposite-a-man-every/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e26/arthur-balfour-15770_deserve_i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if_1819035.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I do not know how it comes about, but if you sit opposite a man every day and you are engaged in fighting…” — Arthur Balfour", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Arthur Balfour", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-balfour/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I do not know how it...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if-you-sit-opposite-a-man-every/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-balfour/i-do-not-know-how-it-comes-about-but-if-you-sit-opposite-a-man-every/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```