---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: the tragedy of an attachment is that if…"
description: "\"the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merel..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg"
---

#  the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not…

![“the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merely causes a flash of pleasure followed by weariness, and it is always accompanied, of course, by the anxiety that you may lose the object of your…” quote by Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg)

> “the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merely causes a flash of pleasure followed by weariness, and it is always accompanied, of course, by the anxiety that you may lose the object of your attachment.”

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Attachment creates suffering whether the desired object is missing or present, leading to fleeting pleasure and lingering anxiety.

**In simple terms:** Attachment brings pain and temporary joy.

Key Takeaway

Recognize and loosen attachment.

Themes

attachment desire anxiety impermanence

Mood

reflective somber

Type

philosophical spiritual

When to use this quote

- relationships
- career goals
- material possessions
- spiritual practice

Key Concepts

Samsara mindfulness non‑attachment

Questions to Reflect On

- How does attachment affect your well‑being?
- Can you find contentment without clinging?

A Different Perspective

Attachment may be a natural human drive that can motivate achievement.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Anxiety](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anxiety/) [Attachment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/attachment/) [Causes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/causes/) [Causes Unhappiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/causes-unhappiness-551044/) [Doe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/doe/) [Flash](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/flash/) [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) [May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/may/) [Pleasure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pleasure/) [Sadness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sadness/) [Tragedy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/tragedy/) [Tragedy Attachment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/tragedy-attachment-5372698/) [Unhappiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unhappiness/) [Unhappiness Attained](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unhappiness-attained-5372699/) [Weariness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/weariness/)

## Related quotes

> [If you look carefully you will see that there is one thing and only one thing that causes unhappiness. The name of that thing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/if-you-look-carefully-you-will-see-that-there-is-one-thing-and-only/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [I don't know the secret to happiness, But I know what causes unhappiness -- Trying to please everyone else instead of just loving yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rashida-rowe/i-don-t-know-the-secret-to-happiness-but-i-know-what-causes/)

[Rashida Rowe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rashida-rowe/)

> [The trap of the self is the trap that causes unhappiness. We define ourselves too much; whereas the infinite, the pure radiant spirit, is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-lenz/the-trap-of-the-self-is-the-trap-that-causes-unhappiness-we-define/)

[Frederick Lenz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-lenz/)

> [Irresolution on the schemes of life which offer themselves to our choice, and inconstancy in pursuing them, are the greatest causes of all our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-addison/irresolution-on-the-schemes-of-life-which-offer-themselves-to-our/)

[Joseph Addison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-addison/)

> [“The only means by which one could attain complete happiness is to avoid living in constant expectation of it. It's the expectation that causes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohammed-naseehu-ali/the-only-means-by-which-one-could-attain-complete-happiness-is-to/)

[Mohammed Naseehu Ali](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohammed-naseehu-ali/)

> [“I didn’t really know the answer to this myself, but saying that wasn’t going to get me off the hook. I started talking without…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hugh-laurie/i-didn-t-really-know-the-answer-to-this-myself-but-saying-that-wasn-t/)

[Hugh Laurie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hugh-laurie/)

> [Next to worry probably one of the most potent causes of unhappiness is envy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bertrand-russell/next-to-worry-probably-one-of-the-most-potent-causes-of-unhappiness/)

[Bertrand Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bertrand-russell/)

> [Among the idle rich, boredom is one of the most common causes of unhappiness. People who have difficulty in earning their living may suffer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-maurois/among-the-idle-rich-boredom-is-one-of-the-most-common-causes-of/)

[Andre Maurois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-maurois/)

> [Envy was one of the most potent causes of unhappiness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bertrand-russell/envy-was-one-of-the-most-potent-causes-of-unhappiness/)

[Bertrand Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bertrand-russell/)

> [One of our major flaws, and causes of unhappiness, is that we find it hard to take note of appreciate and be grateful for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alain-de-botton/one-of-our-major-flaws-and-causes-of-unhappiness-is-that-we-find-it/)

[Alain de Botton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alain-de-botton/)

> [“One of the causes of unhappiness among intellectuals in the present day is that so many of them, especially those whose skill is literary,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bertrand-russell/one-of-the-causes-of-unhappiness-among-intellectuals-in-the-present/)

[Bertrand Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bertrand-russell/)

> [It's only when you become love - in other words, when you have dropped your illusions and attachments - that you will "know." As…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/it-s-only-when-you-become-love-in-other-words-when-you-have-dropped/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [All conflict comes from attachment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/all-conflict-comes-from-attachment/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [“I have no fear of losing you, for you aren’t an object of my property, or anyone else’s. I love you as you are,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/i-have-no-fear-of-losing-you-for-you-aren-t-an-object-of-my-property/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [In the eyes of those lovers of perfection, a work is never finished a word that for them has no sense but abandoned; and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-valery/in-the-eyes-of-those-lovers-of-perfection-a-work-is-never-finished-a/)

[Paul Valery](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-valery/)

## More by Anthony de Mello

> [The poor think they will be happy when they become rich. The rich think they will be happy when they are rid of their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-poor-think-they-will-be-happy-when-they-become-rich-the-rich/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [You only change what you understand. What you do not understand and are not aware of, you repress. You dont change. But when you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/you-only-change-what-you-understand-what-you-do-not-understand-and/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [A zealous disciple expressed a desire to teach others the Truth and asked the Master what he thought about this. The Master said, "Wait."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/a-zealous-disciple-expressed-a-desire-to-teach-others-the-truth-and/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [As the Arabs say, "The nature of rain is the same, but it makes thorns grow in the marshes and flowers in the gardens.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/as-the-arabs-say-the-nature-of-rain-is-the-same-but-it-makes-thorns/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [Sinners often speak the truth. And saints have led people astray. Examine what is said, not the one who says it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/sinners-often-speak-the-truth-and-saints-have-led-people-astray/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [Isn't there such a thing as social liberation?" "Of course there is," said the Master. "How would you describe it?" "Liberation from the need…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/isn-t-there-such-a-thing-as-social-liberation-of-course-there-is-said/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [The important thing is not to know who "I" is or what "I" is. You'll never succeed. There are no words for it. The…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-important-thing-is-not-to-know-who-i-is-or-what-i-is-you-ll-never/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [And increasingly - you know this and so do I we're losing the youth everywhere. They hate us; they are not interested in having…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/and-increasingly-you-know-this-and-so-do-i-we-re-losing-the-youth/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [Spirituality practiced in the state of activity is incomparably superior to that practiced in a state of withdrawel.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/spirituality-practiced-in-the-state-of-activity-is-incomparably/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [You know, all mystics - Catholic, Christian, non-Christian, no matter what their theology, no matter what their religion - are unanimous on one thing:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/you-know-all-mystics-catholic-christian-non-christian-no-matter-what/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [There were rules in the monastery, but the Master always warned against the tyranny of the law. 'Obedience keeps the rules,' he would say.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/there-were-rules-in-the-monastery-but-the-master-always-warned/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [A disciple, in his reverence for the Master, looked upon him as God incarnate. "Tell me, O Master," he said, "why you have come…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/a-disciple-in-his-reverence-for-the-master-looked-upon-him-as-god/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [“And how about you? Do you want to understand and play the game of life or fool around with miracles?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/and-how-about-you-do-you-want-to-understand-and-play-the-game-of-life/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [You don't have to add anything in order to be happy; you've got to drop something.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/you-don-t-have-to-add-anything-in-order-to-be-happy-you-ve-got-to/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

> [Rare indeed, is the relationship in which the other is not cultivated for what one can get for oneself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/rare-indeed-is-the-relationship-in-which-the-other-is-not-cultivated/)

[Anthony de Mello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

[Explore all 253 Anthony de Mello quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/)

## More Anxiety quotes

> [“Anything that you find yourself worrying about regularly may find you suddenly wanting unrealistic changes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nagisa-tatsumi/anything-that-you-find-yourself-worrying-about-regularly-may-find-you/)

[Nagisa Tatsumi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nagisa-tatsumi/)

> [Bein Crazy is the least of my worries.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-kerouac/bein-crazy-is-the-least-of-my-worries/)

[Jack Kerouac](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-kerouac/)

> [The answer to deep anxiety is the deep adoration of God.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ann-voskamp/the-answer-to-deep-anxiety-is-the-deep-adoration-of-god/)

[Ann Voskamp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ann-voskamp/)

> [“Fear of seeing a police car pull into the drive. Fear of falling asleep at night. Fear of not falling asleep. Fear of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/raymond-carver/fear-of-seeing-a-police-car-pull-into-the-drive-fear-of-falling/)

[Raymond Carver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/raymond-carver/)

> [I get nervous when I don't get nervous. If I'm nervous I know I'm going to have a good show.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beyonce-knowles/i-get-nervous-when-i-don-t-get-nervous-if-i-m-nervous-i-know-i-m/)

[Beyonce Knowles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beyonce-knowles/)

> [“Every invention comes through anxiousness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rakesh-wadhwani/every-invention-comes-through-anxiousness/)

[Rakesh Wadhwani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rakesh-wadhwani/)

> [“Do Not Be Anxious 25 e “Therefore I tell you,  f do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/do-not-be-anxious-25-e-therefore-i-tell-you-f-do-not-be-anxious-about/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Nothing happens on its own, you have to make things happen. If you really want to come out of your stressful situation than you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/subodh-gupta/nothing-happens-on-its-own-you-have-to-make-things-happen-if-you/)

[Subodh Gupta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/subodh-gupta/)

> [“I guess if we're talking about my anxiety, the even truthier truth is it started way before that.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kerry-winfrey/i-guess-if-we-re-talking-about-my-anxiety-the-even-truthier-truth-is/)

[Kerry Winfrey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kerry-winfrey/)

> [I was a very good student. Procrastinating gives me anxiety, and getting a B really ticked me off. Sure, I didn't always want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/josie-loren/i-was-a-very-good-student-procrastinating-gives-me-anxiety-and/)

[Josie Loren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/josie-loren/)

> [“The suspense: the fearful, acute suspense: of standing idly by while the life of one we dearly love, is trembling in the balance; the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/the-suspense-the-fearful-acute-suspense-of-standing-idly-by-while-the/)

[Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/)

> [The party in Alobar’s head, which agitation and anxiety were throwing, now was crashed by a notion: existence can be rearranged.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-robbins/the-party-in-alobar-s-head-which-agitation-and-anxiety-were-throwing/)

[Tom Robbins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-robbins/)

> [As you know, I have been very open about my struggle with social anxiety.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/summer-walker/as-you-know-i-have-been-very-open-about-my-struggle-with-social/)

[Summer Walker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/summer-walker/)

> [Anxiety is not to be managed it is a sin that needs to be repented of](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-driscoll/anxiety-is-not-to-be-managed-it-is-a-sin-that-needs-to-be-repented-of/)

[Mark Driscoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-driscoll/)

> [“I’ve always seen this in you, ever since you were a little girl — this hunger to love other people into their highest selves…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-elisabeth/i-ve-always-seen-this-in-you-ever-since-you-were-a-little-girl-this/)

[Jennifer Elisabeth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-elisabeth/)

[Browse all 4,944 Anxiety quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anxiety/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merely causes a flash of pleasure followed by weariness, and it is always accompanied, of course, by the anxiety that you may lose the object of your attachment.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Anthony de Mello"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if-its-object-is-not-attained-it/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Anxiety"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if-its-object-is-not-attained-it/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c00/anthony-de-mello-1331_anxiety_the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if_3100688.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“the tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is…” — Anthony de Mello",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Anthony de Mello",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-de-mello/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "the tragedy of an attachment is...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if-its-object-is-not-attained-it/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-de-mello/the-tragedy-of-an-attachment-is-that-if-its-object-is-not-attained-it/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
