---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You stop pretending life is such fin or…"
description: "\"“You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's often messy and cruel and dull, and we do the best we can. It's unfair, and jerks seem to wi..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png"
---

#  You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's…

![“You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's often messy and cruel and dull, and we do the best we can. It's unfair, and jerks seem to win. But you fall in love with a few people.” quote by Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png)

> ““You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's often messy and cruel and dull, and we do the best we can. It's unfair, and jerks seem to win. But you fall in love with a few people.””

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Life is messy and unfair, yet we still love a few people despite its cruelty.

**In simple terms:** Life is chaotic, but love persists.

Key Takeaway

Embrace love despite life's mess.

Themes

love life imperfection

Mood

hopeful realistic

Type

philosophical inspirational

When to use this quote

- daily struggles
- relationships
- personal growth
- coping with injustice

Key Concepts

existential realism human resilience

Questions to Reflect On

- Who are the few people you love?
- How do you cope with life's unfairness?

A Different Perspective

Love may be limited to a few, leaving many feeling isolated.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Fall in love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fall-in-love/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/)

## Related quotes

> [“Life didn't begin cleanly, and it surely never ended that way. We were blessed with whatever we had in the middle. It made sense…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/life-didn-t-begin-cleanly-and-it-surely-never-ended-that-way-we-were/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [I'm so tired of pretending my life isn't perfect and bitching and just winning every second and I'm not perfect and bitchin'.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-sheen/i-m-so-tired-of-pretending-my-life-isn-t-perfect-and-bitching-and/)

[Charlie Sheen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-sheen/)

> [It was really tiring always pretending to be someone else. Not my life, not my real name, nothing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-hyeon-seo/it-was-really-tiring-always-pretending-to-be-someone-else-not-my-life/)

[Lee Hyeon-seo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lee-hyeon-seo/)

> [“Reclaimed by the small-time day-to-day, pretending life is Back To Normal, wrapping herself shivering against contingency's winter in some threadbare blanket of first-quarter expenses,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-pynchon/reclaimed-by-the-small-time-day-to-day-pretending-life-is-back-to/)

[Thomas Pynchon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-pynchon/)

> [“I am who I’ve been pretending to be my whole life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-am-who-i-ve-been-pretending-to-be-my-whole-life/)

[Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/)

> [“When you are young, you think it's going to be solved by love. But it never is. Being close -- as close as you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-krauss/when-you-are-young-you-think-it-s-going-to-be-solved-by-love-but-it/)

[Nicole Krauss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-krauss/)

> [“People usually fall in love. But some people were born in love. Already. And always.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/c-joybell-c/people-usually-fall-in-love-but-some-people-were-born-in-love-already/)

[C. JoyBell C](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/c-joybell-c/)

> [If you ever fall in love with two people, always choose the second one. If you were really in love with the first, then…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karina-barton/if-you-ever-fall-in-love-with-two-people-always-choose-the-second-one/)

[Karina Barton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karina-barton/)

> [I went through a phase when I was 13 where I would only fall in love with people over the age of 19 or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olivia-wilde/i-went-through-a-phase-when-i-was-13-where-i-would-only-fall-in-love/)

[Olivia Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olivia-wilde/)

> [We consciously decide whether to consider people; we fall in love despite ourselves; we entirely fail to fall in love with people who fall…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matt-ridley/we-consciously-decide-whether-to-consider-people-we-fall-in-love/)

[Matt Ridley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matt-ridley/)

> [“DO NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH PEOPLE LIKE ME Do not fall in love with people like me. People like me will love you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caitlyn-siehl/do-not-fall-in-love-with-people-like-me-do-not-fall-in-love-with/)

[Caitlyn Siehl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caitlyn-siehl/)

> [You don't pick who you fall in love with. There are so few people to love. It's hard for one adult to even like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katharine-hepburn/you-don-t-pick-who-you-fall-in-love-with-there-are-so-few-people-to/)

[Katharine Hepburn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katharine-hepburn/)

> [“There's no need for a reason for people to fall in love. Even if people say there is a reason, that's just something they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yuna-takagi/there-s-no-need-for-a-reason-for-people-to-fall-in-love-even-if/)

[Yuna Takagi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yuna-takagi/)

> [“money’s just an idea, it has power. Only it’s not real power. Just the promise of power. But that promise is enough so long…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-erikson/money-s-just-an-idea-it-has-power-only-it-s-not-real-power-just-the/)

[Steven Erikson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-erikson/)

> [“And you could try to stop pretending to be so fucking perfect. Maybe then people will stop expecting perfection all the time”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/santino-hassell/and-you-could-try-to-stop-pretending-to-be-so-fucking-perfect-maybe/)

[Santino Hassell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/santino-hassell/)

## More by Anne Lamott

> [What an incredible drug fear is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/what-an-incredible-drug-fear-is/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [I guess he'll have to figure out someday that he is supposed to have this dark side, that it is part of what it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-guess-he-ll-have-to-figure-out-someday-that-he-is-supposed-to-have/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [It's funny where we look for salvation, and where we actually find it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/it-s-funny-where-we-look-for-salvation-and-where-we-actually-find-it/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [Why couldn't Jesus command us to obsess over everything, to try to control and manipulate people, to try not to breathe at all, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/why-couldn-t-jesus-command-us-to-obsess-over-everything-to-try-to/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [Publication is not all that it is cracked up to be. But writing is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/publication-is-not-all-that-it-is-cracked-up-to-be-but-writing-is/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [Your problem is how you are going to spend this one odd and precious life you have been issued. Whether you're going to spend…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/your-problem-is-how-you-are-going-to-spend-this-one-odd-and-precious/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [And yet, I do believe there is ultimately meaning in the chaos, and also in the doldrums. What I resist is not the truth…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/and-yet-i-do-believe-there-is-ultimately-meaning-in-the-chaos-and/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [Raising a child, whether or not it is yours, is like Nautilus of the heart and soul.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/raising-a-child-whether-or-not-it-is-yours-is-like-nautilus-of-the/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“I heard a preacher say recently that hope is a revolutionary patience; let me add that so is being a writer. Hope begins in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-heard-a-preacher-say-recently-that-hope-is-a-revolutionary-patience/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-think-perfectionism-is-based-on-the-obsessive-belief-that-if-you/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [All criticism hurts me. I'm so in the wrong business.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/all-criticism-hurts-me-i-m-so-in-the-wrong-business/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [We are going to die, as is everyone we adore - I hate this! But the question is, how do we live as women…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/we-are-going-to-die-as-is-everyone-we-adore-i-hate-this-but-the/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“You will go through your life thinking there was a day in second grade that you must have missed, when the grown-ups came in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-will-go-through-your-life-thinking-there-was-a-day-in-second/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“You begin to string words together like beads to tell a story. You are desperate to communicate, to edify or entertain, to preserve moments…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-begin-to-string-words-together-like-beads-to-tell-a-story-you-are/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“You lose the known package of your nice organized self almost instantly here. Overeating is one way back, the way it is at funerals…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-lose-the-known-package-of-your-nice-organized-self-almost/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

[Explore all 976 Anne Lamott quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

## More Fall in love quotes

> [“I already love in you your beauty, but I am only beginning to love in you that which is eternal and ever precious –…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-tolstoy/i-already-love-in-you-your-beauty-but-i-am-only-beginning-to-love-in/)

[Leo Tolstoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-tolstoy/)

> [“There's no need for a reason for people to fall in love. Even if people say there is a reason, that's just something they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yuna-takagi/there-s-no-need-for-a-reason-for-people-to-fall-in-love-even-if/)

[Yuna Takagi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yuna-takagi/)

> [“Will you destroy something in order to make it beautiful? Will you avoid something in order to fall in love with it? Will you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hanif-hassan-barbhuiya/will-you-destroy-something-in-order-to-make-it-beautiful-will-you/)

[Hanif Hassan Barbhuiya](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hanif-hassan-barbhuiya/)

> [“They say your muscles have memory. Once you've trained your arms to swing a tennis racket or your legs to ride a bike, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-brande/they-say-your-muscles-have-memory-once-you-ve-trained-your-arms-to/)

[Robin Brande](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-brande/)

> [“100 % people fall in love but just few understand what is love exactly”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohammed-zaki-ansari/100-people-fall-in-love-but-just-few-understand-what-is-love-exactly/)

[Mohammed Zaki Ansari](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohammed-zaki-ansari/)

> [“Nothing, again, could be more prosaic and impenetrable than the domestic energies of Miss Diana Duke. But Innocent had somehow blundered on the discovery…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/g-k-chesterton/nothing-again-could-be-more-prosaic-and-impenetrable-than-the/)

[G.K. Chesterton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/g-k-chesterton/)

> [“Be sure to fall in love with someone who loves you more than you love them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tiffany-snow/be-sure-to-fall-in-love-with-someone-who-loves-you-more-than-you-love/)

[Tiffany Snow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tiffany-snow/)

> [When you fall in love for the first time, you're naive to every feeling that you're feeling, and you're almost obsessed with or addicted…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alex-pettyfer/when-you-fall-in-love-for-the-first-time-you-re-naive-to-every/)

[Alex Pettyfer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alex-pettyfer/)

> [“I lost my chance with you then, and maybe I deserved to, for being too scared to speak up and tell you how I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melanie-harlow/i-lost-my-chance-with-you-then-and-maybe-i-deserved-to-for-being-too/)

[Melanie Harlow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melanie-harlow/)

> [ONE stone enough to break a glass,,, ONE sentence is enough to break a heart,,, FIRST sight is enough to fall in love,,, ONE…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/one-stone-enough-to-break-a-glass-one-sentence-is-enough-to-break-a/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [I give my heart completely to the experience and I really connect with people and make friends. I fall in love and then it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/liv-tyler/i-give-my-heart-completely-to-the-experience-and-i-really-connect/)

[Liv Tyler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/liv-tyler/)

> [“Falling in love is easy. Fools fall in love all the time. Staying in love is the test of time and the gift you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-a-murphy/falling-in-love-is-easy-fools-fall-in-love-all-the-time-staying-in/)

[James A. Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-a-murphy/)

> [“What a situation!' cried Miss Squeers; '...What is the reason that men fall in love with me, whether I like it or not, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/what-a-situation-cried-miss-squeers-what-is-the-reason-that-men-fall/)

[Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/)

> [My life always came first. When I got nominated for Diary of a Mad Housewife, I didn't think, 'Aah, now I'll get more money.'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carrie-snodgress/my-life-always-came-first-when-i-got-nominated-for-diary-of-a-mad/)

[Carrie Snodgress](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carrie-snodgress/)

> [It hurts to fall in love with a friend. You keep on hiding your feelings, avoiding it as much as you can until you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-hurts-to-fall-in-love-with-a-friend-you-keep-on-hiding-your/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Browse all 4,044 Fall in love quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fall-in-love/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's often messy and cruel and dull, and we do the best we can. It's unfair, and jerks seem to win. But you fall in love with a few people.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Anne Lamott"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or-makes-sense-it-s-often-messy/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Fall in love"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or-makes-sense-it-s-often-messy/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/anne-lamott-188_fall-in-love_you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or_1449288.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“You stop pretending life is such fin or makes sense. It's often messy and cruel and dull, and we do the best…” — Anne Lamott",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Anne Lamott",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“You stop pretending life is such...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or-makes-sense-it-s-often-messy/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-stop-pretending-life-is-such-fin-or-makes-sense-it-s-often-messy/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
