--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Learning to love back is the hardest part…" description: "\"Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive.\" — Anne Lamott" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png" --- # Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive. ![“Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive.” quote by Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png) > “Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive.” [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. She notes that the hardest challenge in life is learning to return love to others. **In simple terms:** Returning love is the toughest part of living. Key Takeaway Practice giving love back. Themes love vulnerability humanity Mood hopeful introspective Type advice emotional When to use this quote - family dynamics - friendship - therapy sessions Key Concepts emotional intelligence relationships self‑compassion Questions to Reflect On - How do you accept love when offered? - What blocks you from loving back? A Different Perspective Fear of rejection can hinder love reciprocity. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Alive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/alive/) [Learning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/learning/) [Learning to love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/learning-to-love/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) ## Related quotes > [I have been missing the point. The point is not knowing another person, or learning to love another person. The point is simply this:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-wells/i-have-been-missing-the-point-the-point-is-not-knowing-another-person/) [Rebecca Wells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-wells/) > [I don't have a single plan for my life more important than learning to love people well.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrea-gibson/i-don-t-have-a-single-plan-for-my-life-more-important-than-learning/) [Andrea Gibson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrea-gibson/) > [I'm not saying I'm perfect, or fixed, but I am learning to love and accept myself. My outlook is more positive and I am…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demi-lovato/i-m-not-saying-i-m-perfect-or-fixed-but-i-am-learning-to-love-and/) [Demi Lovato](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demi-lovato/) > [I think you have to love yourself before you fall in love. I'm still learning to love myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/serena-williams/i-think-you-have-to-love-yourself-before-you-fall-in-love-i-m-still/) [Serena Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/serena-williams/) > [The one person who will never leave us, whom we will never lose, is ourself. Learning to love our female selves is where our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bell-hooks/the-one-person-who-will-never-leave-us-whom-we-will-never-lose-is/) [Bell Hooks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bell-hooks/) > [When did creating a flawless facade become a more vital goal than learning to love the person who lives inside your skin?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-hopkins/when-did-creating-a-flawless-facade-become-a-more-vital-goal-than/) [Ellen Hopkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-hopkins/) > [If time is my vessel, then learning to love might be my way back to sea](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-banks/if-time-is-my-vessel-then-learning-to-love-might-be-my-way-back-to-sea/) [Paul Banks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-banks/) > [If there's no one in your life to love right now, love yourself. A large part of the path of love is learning to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-lenz/if-there-s-no-one-in-your-life-to-love-right-now-love-yourself-a/) [Frederick Lenz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-lenz/) > [If we would truly seek to be more like our Savior and Master, learning to love as He loves should be our highest goal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ezra-taft-benson/if-we-would-truly-seek-to-be-more-like-our-savior-and-master-learning/) [Ezra Taft Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ezra-taft-benson/) > [Learning to love differently is hard, love with the hands wide open, love with the doors banging on their hinges, the cupboard unlocked, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marge-piercy/learning-to-love-differently-is-hard-love-with-the-hands-wide-open/) [Marge Piercy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marge-piercy/) > [They say learning to love yourself Is the first step That you take when you want to be real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tiesto/they-say-learning-to-love-yourself-is-the-first-step-that-you-take/) [Tiesto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tiesto/) > [Learning to listen to ourselves is a way of learning to love ourselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-z-borysenko/learning-to-listen-to-ourselves-is-a-way-of-learning-to-love-ourselves/) [Joan Z. Borysenko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-z-borysenko/) > [The first step in learning to love others is the attempt to understand them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-von-speyr/the-first-step-in-learning-to-love-others-is-the-attempt-to/) [Adrienne von Speyr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-von-speyr/) > [There are many lessons to learn. Naming just one is next to impossible. However, learning to love and be loved is a good starting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/faith-hill/there-are-many-lessons-to-learn-naming-just-one-is-next-to-impossible/) [Faith Hill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/faith-hill/) > [Learning to love others begins with learning to love ourselves unconditionally first. I will never let myself down, treat myself like a doormat, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anita-moorjani/learning-to-love-others-begins-with-learning-to-love-ourselves/) [Anita Moorjani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anita-moorjani/) ## More by Anne Lamott > [What an incredible drug fear is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/what-an-incredible-drug-fear-is/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [I guess he'll have to figure out someday that he is supposed to have this dark side, that it is part of what it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-guess-he-ll-have-to-figure-out-someday-that-he-is-supposed-to-have/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [It's funny where we look for salvation, and where we actually find it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/it-s-funny-where-we-look-for-salvation-and-where-we-actually-find-it/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [Why couldn't Jesus command us to obsess over everything, to try to control and manipulate people, to try not to breathe at all, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/why-couldn-t-jesus-command-us-to-obsess-over-everything-to-try-to/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [Publication is not all that it is cracked up to be. But writing is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/publication-is-not-all-that-it-is-cracked-up-to-be-but-writing-is/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [Your problem is how you are going to spend this one odd and precious life you have been issued. Whether you're going to spend…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/your-problem-is-how-you-are-going-to-spend-this-one-odd-and-precious/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [And yet, I do believe there is ultimately meaning in the chaos, and also in the doldrums. What I resist is not the truth…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/and-yet-i-do-believe-there-is-ultimately-meaning-in-the-chaos-and/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [Raising a child, whether or not it is yours, is like Nautilus of the heart and soul.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/raising-a-child-whether-or-not-it-is-yours-is-like-nautilus-of-the/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“I heard a preacher say recently that hope is a revolutionary patience; let me add that so is being a writer. Hope begins in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-heard-a-preacher-say-recently-that-hope-is-a-revolutionary-patience/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/i-think-perfectionism-is-based-on-the-obsessive-belief-that-if-you/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [All criticism hurts me. I'm so in the wrong business.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/all-criticism-hurts-me-i-m-so-in-the-wrong-business/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [We are going to die, as is everyone we adore - I hate this! But the question is, how do we live as women…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/we-are-going-to-die-as-is-everyone-we-adore-i-hate-this-but-the/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“You will go through your life thinking there was a day in second grade that you must have missed, when the grown-ups came in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-will-go-through-your-life-thinking-there-was-a-day-in-second/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“You begin to string words together like beads to tell a story. You are desperate to communicate, to edify or entertain, to preserve moments…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-begin-to-string-words-together-like-beads-to-tell-a-story-you-are/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“You lose the known package of your nice organized self almost instantly here. Overeating is one way back, the way it is at funerals…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/you-lose-the-known-package-of-your-nice-organized-self-almost/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) [Explore all 976 Anne Lamott quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) ## More Alive quotes > [I understand that it's the music that keeps me alive... That's my lifeblood. And to give that up for, like, the TV, the cars,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bruce-springsteen/i-understand-that-it-s-the-music-that-keeps-me-alive-that-s-my/) [Bruce Springsteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bruce-springsteen/) > [I feel very grateful to be alive and well enough to make music.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-ant/i-feel-very-grateful-to-be-alive-and-well-enough-to-make-music/) Adam Ant > [I don't crave applause. I'm not one of those guys who comes alive on stage. I'm much more alive at home, I think.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-bowie/i-don-t-crave-applause-i-m-not-one-of-those-guys-who-comes-alive-on/) [David Bowie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-bowie/) > [We must master our egoism, and through this mastery, step outside ourselves and educate ourselves in giving. Fasting requires that we rediscover all that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tariq-ramadan/we-must-master-our-egoism-and-through-this-mastery-step-outside/) [Tariq Ramadan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tariq-ramadan/) > [I can't say that there are 'things' that make me come alive. There are thoughts that make me come alive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/i-can-t-say-that-there-are-things-that-make-me-come-alive-there-are/) [Marianne Williamson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marianne-williamson/) > [We're like the wicked witch. We promise gingerbread, then eat the little brats alive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/orson-scott-card/we-re-like-the-wicked-witch-we-promise-gingerbread-then-eat-the/) [Orson Scott Card](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/orson-scott-card/) > [If Jovan Belcher didn't possess a gun, he and Kasandra Perkins would both be alive today.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-costas/if-jovan-belcher-didn-t-possess-a-gun-he-and-kasandra-perkins-would/) [Bob Costas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-costas/) > [Peace is an ongoing process. It begins with the first step and it does not end. We, all of us alive today, are the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-krieger/peace-is-an-ongoing-process-it-begins-with-the-first-step-and-it-does/) [David Krieger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-krieger/) > [I think adoption becomes complicated whenever the biological parents are alive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-haven/i-think-adoption-becomes-complicated-whenever-the-biological-parents/) [James Haven](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-haven/) > [The pain of love is the pain of being alive. It is a perpetual wound.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maureen-duffy/the-pain-of-love-is-the-pain-of-being-alive-it-is-a-perpetual-wound/) [Maureen Duffy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maureen-duffy/) > [I have tried to resign myself, and to console myself; and that, I hope, I may have done imperfectly; but what I cannot firmly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/i-have-tried-to-resign-myself-and-to-console-myself-and-that-i-hope-i/) [Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/) > [If Melanchthon were alive today, he might not weep because of controversies that surround the Lord's Supper, but he might well sorrow because of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erwin-w-lutzer/if-melanchthon-were-alive-today-he-might-not-weep-because-of/) [Erwin W. Lutzer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erwin-w-lutzer/) > [If you’re alive, don’t move, if you’re dead, don’t worry about it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurell-k-hamilton/if-you-re-alive-don-t-move-if-you-re-dead-don-t-worry-about-it/) [Laurell K. Hamilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurell-k-hamilton/) > [Here Greek and Roman find themselves alive along these crowded shelves; and Shakespeare treads again his stage, and Chaucer paints anew his age.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-greenleaf-whittier/here-greek-and-roman-find-themselves-alive-along-these-crowded/) [John Greenleaf Whittier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-greenleaf-whittier/) > [You're alive!" Fezzik cried. The man in black sat immobile, like a ventriloquist's dummy, just his mouth moving. "That is perhaps the most childishly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-goldman/you-re-alive-fezzik-cried-the-man-in-black-sat-immobile-like-a/) [William Goldman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-goldman/) [Browse all 7,282 Alive quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/alive/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Anne Lamott" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-part-of-being-alive/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Alive" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-part-of-being-alive/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7c/anne-lamott-188_alive_learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-par_279883.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Learning to love back is the hardest part of being alive.” — Anne Lamott", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Anne Lamott", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Learning to love back is the...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-part-of-being-alive/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/learning-to-love-back-is-the-hardest-part-of-being-alive/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```