--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Perhaps one of the hardest things about…" description: "\"“Perhaps one of the hardest things about having kids is realizing that you love them more than your wife. that it's possible to love someone more than ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a80/andrew-kaufman-23239_getting-stronger_perhaps-one-of-the-hardest-things-about_16841.jpg" --- # Perhaps one of the hardest things about having kids is… ![“Perhaps one of the hardest things about having kids is realizing that you love them more than your wife. that it's possible to love someone more than you love your wife. what's even worse is that it's a love you don't have to work at. it's just there. it just sits there, indestructible, getting…” quote by Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a80/andrew-kaufman-23239_getting-stronger_perhaps-one-of-the-hardest-things-about_16841.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a80/andrew-kaufman-23239_getting-stronger_perhaps-one-of-the-hardest-things-about_16841.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a80/andrew-kaufman-23239_getting-stronger_perhaps-one-of-the-hardest-things-about_16841.jpg) > ““Perhaps one of the hardest things about having kids is realizing that you love them more than your wife. that it's possible to love someone more than you love your wife. what's even worse is that it's a love you don't have to work at. it's just there. it just sits there, indestructible, getting stronger and stronger. while the love for your wife, the one you do have to work at, and work so very hard at, gets nothing. Gets neglected, left to fend for itself. like a houseplant forgotten on a windowsill .”” [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker reflects on the effortless, innate love for children that can surpass the effortful, cultivated love for a spouse, highlighting how parental love feels indestructible while marital love may require continual nurturing. **In simple terms:** Parental love feels natural; marital love needs work. Key Takeaway Child love is instinctive, spousal love demands effort. Themes family dynamics love hierarchy parental instinct marital maintenance emotional contrast relationship priorities Mood nostalgic reflective melancholic Type personal reflection advice When to use this quote - new parents feeling overwhelmed - married couples facing distance - parents comparing bonds - spouses noticing neglect - counselors addressing relationship balance Key Concepts unconditional love effort vs. ease emotional resilience neglect Practical Applications - therapy for couples - parenting workshops Questions to Reflect On - How can couples intentionally nurture their marital bond? - What practices prevent parental love from eclipsing spousal connection? ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Getting stronger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/getting-stronger/) [Having kids](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/having-kids/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Love your wife](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-your-wife/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) ## Related quotes > [“The point is I don't love your wife. I love your daughter, sir.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-webb/the-point-is-i-don-t-love-your-wife-i-love-your-daughter-sir/) Charles Webb > [When there is love, there is no duty. When you love your wife, you share everything with her-your property, your trouble, your anxiety, your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jiddu-krishnamurti/when-there-is-love-there-is-no-duty-when-you-love-your-wife-you-share/) [Jiddu Krishnamurti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jiddu-krishnamurti/) > [What does it mean to love someone with all your heart? It means to love with all your emotional feelings and with all your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ezra-taft-benson/what-does-it-mean-to-love-someone-with-all-your-heart-it-means-to/) [Ezra Taft Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ezra-taft-benson/) > [If you're married, and you have a wife, and you really love your wife, is it good enough to only say to your wife…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-tebow/if-you-re-married-and-you-have-a-wife-and-you-really-love-your-wife-2/) [Tim Tebow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-tebow/) > [“It is not enough that you honor, respect, and love your wife. You must put this honor, respect, and love into the forms of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-roberts-wells/it-is-not-enough-that-you-honor-respect-and-love-your-wife-you-must/) [Samuel Roberts Wells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-roberts-wells/) > [“Here it is. Let's say you're married, you love your wife, but you're attracted by another woman.' 'Excuse me, but I absolutely cannot understand…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-tolstoy/here-it-is-let-s-say-you-re-married-you-love-your-wife-but-you-re/) [Leo Tolstoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-tolstoy/) > [You can be with your wife, very happily married, and then you meet some woman and you love her. But you love your wife,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/woody-allen/you-can-be-with-your-wife-very-happily-married-and-then-you-meet-some/) [Woody Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/woody-allen/) > [Love your wife or husband and show your love by your constant kindness and caresses](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/love-your-wife-or-husband-and-show-your-love-by-your-constant/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [“If you do not know why you should love your wife as a man, love her because she is more emotionally oriented.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anyaele-sam-chiyson/if-you-do-not-know-why-you-should-love-your-wife-as-a-man-love-her/) Anyaele Sam Chiyson > [You say you love your wife. You depend on her; she has given you her body, her emotions, her encouragement, a certain feeling of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jiddu-krishnamurti/you-say-you-love-your-wife-you-depend-on-her-she-has-given-you-her/) [Jiddu Krishnamurti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jiddu-krishnamurti/) > [Like your job. Love your wife.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-candy/like-your-job-love-your-wife/) [John Candy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-candy/) > [“Seriously, I fucking love your wife, man. She's awesome. Can I have her?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kylie-scott/seriously-i-fucking-love-your-wife-man-she-s-awesome-can-i-have-her/) [Kylie Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kylie-scott/) > [“If someone were to ask you, “Why do you love your wife?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alex-kendrick/if-someone-were-to-ask-you-why-do-you-love-your-wife/) [Alex Kendrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alex-kendrick/) > [If you're married, and you have a wife, and you really love your wife, is it good enough to only say to your wife…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-tebow/if-you-re-married-and-you-have-a-wife-and-you-really-love-your-wife/) [Tim Tebow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-tebow/) > [The bottom line is, you love your wife, you do your best with that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sean-penn/the-bottom-line-is-you-love-your-wife-you-do-your-best-with-that/) [Sean Penn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sean-penn/) ## More by Andrew Kaufman > [“Are these affairs an attempt to figure out who you are?" "Maybe..." "And you think that everyone else knows this? That they know who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/are-these-affairs-an-attempt-to-figure-out-who-you-are-maybe-and-you/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“It’s true most superheroes have funny names. But they have to come up with these names by themselves. Think about how hard it is.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/it-s-true-most-superheroes-have-funny-names-but-they-have-to-come-up/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [There are two ways to get rid of an anxiety monster,my friend-you either have a bath or a nap.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/there-are-two-ways-to-get-rid-of-an-anxiety-monster-my-friend-you/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“He knocks on doors and stands there. 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You have to relinquish control…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/no-one-gets-found-in-love-everyone-gets-lost-in-it-because-love-is/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“the code of a world he'd never been invited to join.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/the-code-of-a-world-he-d-never-been-invited-to-join/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“We are now, all of us, cinematographers for the movie of our own lives. Not the star. Not the director. Not even the writer.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/we-are-now-all-of-us-cinematographers-for-the-movie-of-our-own-lives/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“To lose one's keys is the equivalent of losing one's mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/to-lose-one-s-keys-is-the-equivalent-of-losing-one-s-mind/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“The Sloth hated himself. He considered himself lazy. He had a dead-end job and no plans to get a better one. His relationship was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/the-sloth-hated-himself-he-considered-himself-lazy-he-had-a-dead-end/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“We’re here,’ the Clock says. The Perfectionist opens her eyes. She sees nothing. It’s white. All white. There’s no up. There’s no down. No…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/we-re-here-the-clock-says-the-perfectionist-opens-her-eyes-she-sees/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) > [“When Aquatics are overwhelmed, they seek out the tallest object in view, lie on their backs, put their heads against it and look up.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-kaufman/when-aquatics-are-overwhelmed-they-seek-out-the-tallest-object-in/) [Andrew Kaufman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) [Explore all 25 Andrew Kaufman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-kaufman/) ## More Getting stronger quotes > [I have to keep working, keep getting stronger, keep shooting - every day, every day, to get better. That's how great players become great…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evan-fournier/i-have-to-keep-working-keep-getting-stronger-keep-shooting-every-day/) [Evan Fournier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evan-fournier/) > [Please understand, that I'm only your man and my heart's getting stronger. Don't keep me waiting much longer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/freddie-mcgregor/please-understand-that-i-m-only-your-man-and-my-heart-s-getting/) [Freddie Mcgregor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/freddie-mcgregor/) > [I'm only a man with a candle to guide me, I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me: a monster, I've turned into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/imagine-dragons/i-m-only-a-man-with-a-candle-to-guide-me-i-m-taking-a-stand-to-escape/) [Imagine Dragons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/imagine-dragons/) > [People say we shouldnt be together We're too young to know about forever but I say they dont know what they talking about Cause…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kemis-khan/people-say-we-shouldnt-be-together-we-re-too-young-to-know-about/) [Kemis Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kemis-khan/) > [Being sore makes me happy cause I know I worked hard and and am getting stronger.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-sore-makes-me-happy-cause-i-know-i-worked-hard-and-and-am/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [~When everything falling down your heart is building up and getting stronger < 3 ~](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/she-s-gone/when-everything-falling-down-your-heart-is-building-up-and-getting/) She's\_gone > [I once knew a girl that meant the world to me, she was just amazing. She was that one girl in my life I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mahmoud-el-hallab/i-once-knew-a-girl-that-meant-the-world-to-me-she-was-just-amazing/) [Mahmoud El Hallab](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mahmoud-el-hallab/) > [The challenge and the energy running requires may be a selfish one, but it actually motivates me to be stronger in my relationships.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-benoit/the-challenge-and-the-energy-running-requires-may-be-a-selfish-one/) [Joan Benoit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-benoit/) > [The sad part is that all we're trying to do is not feel that underlying uneasiness. The sadder part is that we proceed in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pema-ch-dr-n/the-sad-part-is-that-all-we-re-trying-to-do-is-not-feel-that/) [Pema Chodron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pema-ch-dr-n/) > [“Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars’ worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/benjamin-graham/americans-are-getting-stronger-twenty-years-ago-it-took-two-people-to/) [Benjamin Graham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/benjamin-graham/) > [This love is only getting stronger, so I dont wanna wait any longer, I just wanna tell the world, that you're mine girl.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/this-love-is-only-getting-stronger-so-i-dont-wanna-wait-any-longer-i/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Your heart never breaks, it goes through a process of getting stronger.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/your-heart-never-breaks-it-goes-through-a-process-of-getting-stronger/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [My inner strength and self respect is getting stronger every day. Thank you to those who tried to bring me down. 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When the wind blows hard on a tree, the roots stretch and grow…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-carmichael/let-us-not-be-surprised-when-we-have-to-face-difficulties-when-the/) [Amy Carmichael](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-carmichael/) [Browse all 139 Getting stronger quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/getting-stronger/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Perhaps one of the hardest things about having kids is realizing that you love them more than your wife. that it's possible to love someone more than you love your wife. what's even worse is that it's a love you don't have to work at. it's just there. it just sits there, indestructible, getting stronger and stronger. while the love for your wife, the one you do have to work at, and work so very hard at, gets nothing. 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