--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I had rehearsed losing him not just to…" description: "\"“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my wi..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png" --- # I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering… ![“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my willingness to accept the very worst might not induce fate to soften its blow.” quote by André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png) > ““I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my willingness to accept the very worst might not induce fate to soften its blow.”” [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator prepares for loss by imagining it in small, controlled doses, hoping that acceptance will lessen the impact of actual tragedy. **In simple terms:** Imagining loss can soften its blow. Key Takeaway Practice acceptance to lessen future pain. Themes grief anticipation psychology Mood melancholic reflective Type literary philosophical When to use this quote - relationship breakup - terminal illness - personal loss - preemptive coping Key Concepts Stoicism emotional regulation anticipation Questions to Reflect On - Can imagined loss truly reduce suffering? - What risks arise from rehearsing worst‑case scenarios? A Different Perspective Acceptance may not change outcomes, only perception. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Superstitious](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/superstitious/) ## Related quotes > [“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand; but, as all superstitious people do,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-ward-off-suffering-by-taking/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“suddenly stopped myself, knowing, by an inverse logic familiar to superstitious people, that the very foretaste of sorrows to come presumed a degree of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/suddenly-stopped-myself-knowing-by-an-inverse-logic-familiar-to/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [I'm one of the most superstitious people I know. There are these two battling parts of me, one is very rational and intellectual, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-boden/i-m-one-of-the-most-superstitious-people-i-know-there-are-these-two/) [Anna Boden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-boden/) > [I’m not superstitious. I’m a witch. Witches aren’t superstitious. We are what people are superstitious of.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-pratchett/i-m-not-superstitious-i-m-a-witch-witches-aren-t-superstitious-we-are/) [Terry Pratchett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-pratchett/) > [But I believe I rather like superstitious people. They lend color to life. Wouldn't it be a rather drab world if everybody was wise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/but-i-believe-i-rather-like-superstitious-people-they-lend-color-to/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I'm not one of those superstitious people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/luke-evans/i-m-not-one-of-those-superstitious-people/) [Luke Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/luke-evans/) > [I'm a very superstitious person. I come from a long line of superstitious people, so it's not going anywhere. For instance, we have this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-boden/i-m-a-very-superstitious-person-i-come-from-a-long-line-of/) [Anna Boden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-boden/) > [I don't respect religon. I don't respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/i-don-t-respect-religon-i-don-t-respect-superstitious-thinking-and/) [Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/) > [The Jewish part of me is superstitious.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gwyneth-paltrow/the-jewish-part-of-me-is-superstitious/) [Gwyneth Paltrow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gwyneth-paltrow/) > [If you were to leave the calendar on Friday the 13th, you will be killed by a witch the very next day.w](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-were-to-leave-the-calendar-on-friday-the-13th-you-will-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Any sizeable Portuguese town looks like a superstitious bride's finery - something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-mccarthy/any-sizeable-portuguese-town-looks-like-a-superstitious-bride-s/) [Mary McCarthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-mccarthy/) > [“In spite of being complicated people choose superstitions over common sense.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amit-kalantri/in-spite-of-being-complicated-people-choose-superstitions-over-common/) [Amit Kalantri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amit-kalantri/) > [Men become superstitious, not because they have too much imagination, but because they are not aware that they have any.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/men-become-superstitious-not-because-they-have-too-much-imagination/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I look back, now, and I know that the naming moment, which seemed so insignificant then, which seemed to demand no more than an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-david-roberts/i-look-back-now-and-i-know-that-the-naming-moment-which-seemed-so/) [Gregory David Roberts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-david-roberts/) > [I'm a little bit superstitious, and I think that just comes from playing hockey. I won't avoid the number thirteen. A big one for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-badge-dale/i-m-a-little-bit-superstitious-and-i-think-that-just-comes-from/) [James Badge Dale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-badge-dale/) ## More by André Aciman > [Don't all writers have a hidden nerve, call it a secret chamber, something irreducibly theirs, which stirs their prose and makes it tick and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/don-t-all-writers-have-a-hidden-nerve-call-it-a-secret-chamber/) [Andre Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“I wanted him to remember the morning on Monet's berm when I'd kissed him not the first but the second time and given him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-wanted-him-to-remember-the-morning-on-monet-s-berm-when-i-d-kissed/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [Rituals are how we step into our private field of dreams, a small Elysium all our own. Rituals are made not just for us,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/rituals-are-how-we-step-into-our-private-field-of-dreams-a-small/) [Andre Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“I desperately wanted to give him something. By contrast, taking seemed so bland, so facile, so mechanical.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-desperately-wanted-to-give-him-something-by-contrast-taking-seemed/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“The man who'll lay the last stone here isn't even born yet.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/the-man-who-ll-lay-the-last-stone-here-isn-t-even-born-yet/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [Proust is interested in minutiae because life, as he sees it, is seldom ever about things but about our impression of things, not about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/proust-is-interested-in-minutiae-because-life-as-he-sees-it-is-seldom/) [Andre Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“Well, since you're not going to do anything with me—can you at least read me a story? I'd settle for that. I wanted him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/well-since-you-re-not-going-to-do-anything-with-me-can-you-at-least/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“This is heaven.” And I wouldn’t hear him say another word for at least an hour. There was nothing I loved more in life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/this-is-heaven-and-i-wouldn-t-hear-him-say-another-word-for-at-least/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“He loved the sticky taste. What had I done? I told him and pointed to the bruised evidence sitting on my desk. “Let me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/he-loved-the-sticky-taste-what-had-i-done-i-told-him-and-pointed-to/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“When had they separated us, you and me, Oliver? And why did I know it, and why didn't you?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/when-had-they-separated-us-you-and-me-oliver-and-why-did-i-know-it/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“As we were swimming back, he asked as though it were an afterthought, “Are you going to hold last night against me?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/as-we-were-swimming-back-he-asked-as-though-it-were-an-afterthought/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“To be with you. To be with you, Oliver. With or without my bathing suit. To be with you on my bed. In your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/to-be-with-you-to-be-with-you-oliver-with-or-without-my-bathing-suit/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“I thought I could ever want another living soul, gently, softly, and, with the kindness one Jew extends to another, work his way into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-thought-i-could-ever-want-another-living-soul-gently-softly-and/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [“Oliver: But there's the catch: you're still twenty years younger than those gathered around you, which is why I can be twenty-four in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/oliver-but-there-s-the-catch-you-re-still-twenty-years-younger-than/) [André Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) > [I cannot write if there is a sense of plenitude. I have to hypothesize that there is a loss.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-cannot-write-if-there-is-a-sense-of-plenitude-i-have-to-hypothesize/) [Andre Aciman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) [Explore all 527 André Aciman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/) ## More Superstitious quotes > [I'm a little bit superstitious, and I think that just comes from playing hockey. I won't avoid the number thirteen. A big one for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-badge-dale/i-m-a-little-bit-superstitious-and-i-think-that-just-comes-from/) [James Badge Dale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-badge-dale/) > [I look back, now, and I know that the naming moment, which seemed so insignificant then, which seemed to demand no more than an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-david-roberts/i-look-back-now-and-i-know-that-the-naming-moment-which-seemed-so/) [Gregory David Roberts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-david-roberts/) > [Men become superstitious, not because they have too much imagination, but because they are not aware that they have any.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/men-become-superstitious-not-because-they-have-too-much-imagination/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“In spite of being complicated people choose superstitions over common sense.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amit-kalantri/in-spite-of-being-complicated-people-choose-superstitions-over-common/) [Amit Kalantri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amit-kalantri/) > [Any sizeable Portuguese town looks like a superstitious bride's finery - something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-mccarthy/any-sizeable-portuguese-town-looks-like-a-superstitious-bride-s/) [Mary McCarthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-mccarthy/) > [If you were to leave the calendar on Friday the 13th, you will be killed by a witch the very next day.w](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-were-to-leave-the-calendar-on-friday-the-13th-you-will-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The Jewish part of me is superstitious.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gwyneth-paltrow/the-jewish-part-of-me-is-superstitious/) [Gwyneth Paltrow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gwyneth-paltrow/) > [I don't respect religon. I don't respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/i-don-t-respect-religon-i-don-t-respect-superstitious-thinking-and/) [Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/) > [I'm very superstitious, and I think it's bad luck. You don't have to show your love by tattooing it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/priya-sachdev/i-m-very-superstitious-and-i-think-it-s-bad-luck-you-don-t-have-to/) [Priya Sachdev](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/priya-sachdev/) > [My feeling about fears is, if you voice your fears, they may come true. I'm superstitious enough to believe that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meryl-streep/my-feeling-about-fears-is-if-you-voice-your-fears-they-may-come-true/) [Meryl Streep](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meryl-streep/) > [The greatest part of mankind labor under one delirium or another; and Don Quixote differed from the rest, not in madness, but the species…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-fielding/the-greatest-part-of-mankind-labor-under-one-delirium-or-another-and/) [Henry Fielding](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-fielding/) > [The proverb says, "Born lucky, always lucky," and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/the-proverb-says-born-lucky-always-lucky-and-i-am-very-superstitious/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [“For he is superstitious grown of late, Quite from the main opinion he held once Of fantasy, of dreams, and ceremonies.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/for-he-is-superstitious-grown-of-late-quite-from-the-main-opinion-he/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [People who believe in gun control are ignorant, superstitious or stupid.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charley-reese/people-who-believe-in-gun-control-are-ignorant-superstitious-or-stupid/) [Charley Reese](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charley-reese/) > [Footballers are very superstitious.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-crouch/footballers-are-very-superstitious/) [Peter Crouch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-crouch/) [Browse all 345 Superstitious quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/superstitious/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my willingness to accept the very worst might not induce fate to soften its blow.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "André Aciman" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-ward-off-suffering-by-taking-2/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Superstitious" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-ward-off-suffering-by-taking-2/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/andre-aciman-459_superstitious_i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-w_1866465.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as…” — André Aciman", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "André Aciman", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andre-aciman/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“I had rehearsed losing him not...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-ward-off-suffering-by-taking-2/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andre-aciman/i-had-rehearsed-losing-him-not-just-to-ward-off-suffering-by-taking-2/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```