--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: When you are criticizing someone, you…" description: "\"When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to your own experience - not others'.\" — Amy Dickinson" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg" --- # When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to… ![“When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to your own experience - not others'.” quote by Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg) > “When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to your own experience - not others'.” [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. When critiquing, focus on personal experience rather than judging others. **In simple terms:** Criticism should be self‑referential. Key Takeaway Speak from your own perspective. Themes communication criticism empathy self‑awareness Mood considerate analytical Type advice philosophical When to use this quote - feedback - conflict resolution - teaching - leadership Key Concepts psychology interpersonal skills Questions to Reflect On - How can you incorporate others' views? - When is personal anecdote appropriate? A Different Perspective Over‑reliance on self‑experience may miss broader context. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Experience](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/experience/) [Women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/women/) ## Related quotes > [The most powerful message is the one you cannot hear nor speak, but see and experience.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-most-powerful-message-is-the-one-you-cannot-hear-nor-speak-but/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I've been water-boarded, and I speak from experience, and it's torture.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-ventura/i-ve-been-water-boarded-and-i-speak-from-experience-and-it-s-torture/) [Jesse Ventura](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-ventura/) > [I feel like it's almost my purpose to speak up about my experience so it could help somebody else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/normani-hamilton/i-feel-like-it-s-almost-my-purpose-to-speak-up-about-my-experience-so/) Normani Hamilton > [Loving the self, to me, begins with never ever criticizing ourselves for anything. Criticism locks us into the very pattern we are trying to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/loving-the-self-to-me-begins-with-never-ever-criticizing-ourselves/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Criticism does not make you smarter or better than the one you are criticizing. In fact, the stuff you are critical of in others…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iyanla-vanzant/criticism-does-not-make-you-smarter-or-better-than-the-one-you-are/) [Iyanla Vanzant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/iyanla-vanzant/) > [If you are against yourself, you will never reach your highest potential. And when you criticize yourself, you're criticizing God.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/if-you-are-against-yourself-you-will-never-reach-your-highest/) [Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/) > [If you shut yourself up disdainfully in your ivory tower and insist that you have your own conscience and are satisfied with its approval,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/luigi-pirandello/if-you-shut-yourself-up-disdainfully-in-your-ivory-tower-and-insist/) [Luigi Pirandello](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/luigi-pirandello/) > [I want to avoid sounding like I'm criticizing because I don't have all the facts in front of me yet. And I am trying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/keith-ellison/i-want-to-avoid-sounding-like-i-m-criticizing-because-i-don-t-have/) [Keith Ellison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/keith-ellison/) > [Criticizing Israel is not anti-Semitic, and saying so is vile. But singling out Israel for opprobrium and international sanction out of all proportion to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/criticizing-israel-is-not-anti-semitic-and-saying-so-is-vile-but/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [People who are criticizing... don't really get it, because if they did, they would like it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gwyneth-paltrow/people-who-are-criticizing-don-t-really-get-it-because-if-they-did/) [Gwyneth Paltrow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gwyneth-paltrow/) > [Criticizing reporters is like boo-ing at the Special Olympics.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-jackson/criticizing-reporters-is-like-boo-ing-at-the-special-olympics/) [Michael Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-jackson/) > [Never criticize someone you never personally knew. For in time, you might find yourself to be in a much worse situation than the one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jazz-ramirez/never-criticize-someone-you-never-personally-knew-for-in-time-you/) [Jazz Ramirez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jazz-ramirez/) > [I've often been accused of spending more time and energy criticizing my fellow Democrats than criticizing Republicans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mickey-kaus/i-ve-often-been-accused-of-spending-more-time-and-energy-criticizing/) [Mickey Kaus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mickey-kaus/) > [I feel that the task of criticizing my poetry is best left to others (i.e. critics) and would much rather have it take place…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-atwood/i-feel-that-the-task-of-criticizing-my-poetry-is-best-left-to-others/) [Margaret Atwood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-atwood/) > [When I passed the Chancellor he arose, waved his hand at me, and I waved back at him. I think the writers showed bad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-owens/when-i-passed-the-chancellor-he-arose-waved-his-hand-at-me-and-i/) [Jesse Owens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-owens/) ## More by Amy Dickinson > [Sometimes the way through someone's tough outer shell is to do something obvious, thoughtful and sweet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/sometimes-the-way-through-someone-s-tough-outer-shell-is-to-do/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > ["Nags" nag because they feel they aren't being heard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/nags-nag-because-they-feel-they-aren-t-being-heard/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [If you turn the heat down on the relationship, she will soften, the tension will lessen, and she will eventually inch closer to you.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/if-you-turn-the-heat-down-on-the-relationship-she-will-soften-the/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [You must give and receive love only when doing so doesn't hurt others. That's the ethical path, and you should gain strength from walking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/you-must-give-and-receive-love-only-when-doing-so-doesn-t-hurt-others/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [If you feel guilty about not "playing nice," then you could easily alleviate your guilt by playing nice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/if-you-feel-guilty-about-not-playing-nice-then-you-could-easily/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Perspective is the enemy of long-lost love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/perspective-is-the-enemy-of-long-lost-love/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [People don't change when they don't acknowledge their actions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/people-don-t-change-when-they-don-t-acknowledge-their-actions/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [When you are wondering whether to say something negative about someone - even if it is true - the best rule to follow is,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-you-are-wondering-whether-to-say-something-negative-about/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Life is easier when you are comfortable in your own skin.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/life-is-easier-when-you-are-comfortable-in-your-own-skin/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Groveling for connection from someone who compares you to Hitler is not good for a person's self-esteem.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/groveling-for-connection-from-someone-who-compares-you-to-hitler-is/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Friendships can survive after massive disappointment, but only if both parties are honest with one another.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/friendships-can-survive-after-massive-disappointment-but-only-if-both/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Bullies often act out by marshaling aggression to cover up for insecurity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/bullies-often-act-out-by-marshaling-aggression-to-cover-up-for/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Have you ever noticed how bored people are also boring?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/have-you-ever-noticed-how-bored-people-are-also-boring/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [When the choice is between a demanding relationship and a vintage pickup truck, I'll choose the truck every time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-the-choice-is-between-a-demanding-relationship-and-a-vintage/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) > [Needy and boring parents tend to have needy and bored children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/needy-and-boring-parents-tend-to-have-needy-and-bored-children/) [Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) [Explore all 78 Amy Dickinson quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/) ## More Criticize quotes > [When I passed the Chancellor he arose, waved his hand at me, and I waved back at him. I think the writers showed bad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-owens/when-i-passed-the-chancellor-he-arose-waved-his-hand-at-me-and-i/) [Jesse Owens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-owens/) > [Lavish praise on people and people will flourish; criticize people and they'll shrivel up.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-branson/lavish-praise-on-people-and-people-will-flourish-criticize-people-and/) [Richard Branson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-branson/) > [If you are well-mannered towards those whose views are similar to yours, you may be said to exhibit a fairly good character. But, if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-are-well-mannered-towards-those-whose-views-are-similar-to/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [For some reason, we are truly convinced that if we criticize ourselves, the criticism will lead to change. If we are harsh, we believe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/geneen-roth/for-some-reason-we-are-truly-convinced-that-if-we-criticize-ourselves/) [Geneen Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/geneen-roth/) > [You can criticize Trump and his wealth all day long, but you can't say he hasn't worked. You can say that about the Clintons.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rush-limbaugh/you-can-criticize-trump-and-his-wealth-all-day-long-but-you-can-t-say/) [Rush Limbaugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rush-limbaugh/) > [If our aim is to praise, we should forget to criticize; if our aim is to criticize, we should remember to praise](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-johnson/if-our-aim-is-to-praise-we-should-forget-to-criticize-if-our-aim-is/) [Samuel Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-johnson/) > [Those who lack the confidence and esteem to make the decisions that they need to make for themselves, are usually the same ones who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/those-who-lack-the-confidence-and-esteem-to-make-the-decisions-that/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The privilege of prayer to me is one of the most cherished possessions, because faith and experience alike convince me that God himself sees…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wilfred-grenfell/the-privilege-of-prayer-to-me-is-one-of-the-most-cherished/) [Wilfred Grenfell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wilfred-grenfell/) > [We are all too keenly aware that those of you who supported us by purchasing the 3DS in the beginningmay feel betrayed and criticize…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/satoru-iwata/we-are-all-too-keenly-aware-that-those-of-you-who-supported-us-by/) [Satoru Iwata](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/satoru-iwata/) > [Woody Allen is a genius. His films are wonderful. He's poetic, but he's also a critic. He artfully steps back from a social setting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mel-brooks/woody-allen-is-a-genius-his-films-are-wonderful-he-s-poetic-but-he-s/) [Mel Brooks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mel-brooks/) > [Men can be divided into 2 groups: one that goes ahead and achieves something, and one that comes after and criticizes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seneca-the-younger/men-can-be-divided-into-2-groups-one-that-goes-ahead-and-achieves/) [Seneca the Younger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seneca-the-younger/) > [If you don't allow people to contribute, to offer their point of view, or to criticize what has been put before them, then they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nelson-mandela/if-you-don-t-allow-people-to-contribute-to-offer-their-point-of-view/) [Nelson Mandela](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nelson-mandela/) > [There's plenty to criticize about the mass media, but they are the source of regular information about a wide range of topics. You can't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noam-chomsky/there-s-plenty-to-criticize-about-the-mass-media-but-they-are-the/) [Noam Chomsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noam-chomsky/) > [When we criticize in Iran the actions of the government, the fundamentalists say that we and the Bush Administration are in the same camp.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirin-ebadi/when-we-criticize-in-iran-the-actions-of-the-government-the/) [Shirin Ebadi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirin-ebadi/) > [When I first prepared this particular talk... I realized that my usual approach is usually critical. That is, a lot of the things that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-kay/when-i-first-prepared-this-particular-talk-i-realized-that-my-usual/) [Alan Kay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-kay/) Browse all 1,182 Criticize quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to your own experience - not others'.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Amy Dickinson" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-should-speak-only-to-your-own/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Criticize" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-should-speak-only-to-your-own/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa1/amy-dickinson-8789_criticize_when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-sho_1044599.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you are criticizing someone, you should speak only to your own experience - not others'.” — Amy Dickinson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Amy Dickinson", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "When you are criticizing someone, you...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-should-speak-only-to-your-own/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/when-you-are-criticizing-someone-you-should-speak-only-to-your-own/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```