--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding…" description: "\"I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth could have a cumulative renunciatory effect. Sexual shame is in itself a kind of death.\" — Al..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg" --- # I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth… ![“I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth could have a cumulative renunciatory effect. Sexual shame is in itself a kind of death.” quote by Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg) > “I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth could have a cumulative renunciatory effect. Sexual shame is in itself a kind of death.” [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Suppressing one's sexual identity leads to self‑denial and emotional death, as shame erodes personal vitality. **In simple terms:** Hiding sexuality harms the self. Key Takeaway Embrace authenticity to avoid self‑destruction. Themes identity shame self‑acceptance psychology death Mood reflective somber Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - coming out - therapy - creative writing - support groups Key Concepts Queer theory existentialism psychic health Questions to Reflect On - How does secrecy affect mental health? - What steps can reduce sexual shame? A Different Perspective Shame can be reinforced by societal pressures, making authenticity risky. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Death](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/death/) [Erotic](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/erotic/) [Lifetime](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lifetime/) [Shame](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/shame/) ## Related quotes > [“But how could he admire Joyce’s lengthy, libidinal ‘yes’ so fervently and end up saying ‘no’ to his own life? I suppose that a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/but-how-could-he-admire-joyce-s-lengthy-libidinal-yes-so-fervently/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“Sexual shame is in itself a kind of death.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/sexual-shame-is-in-itself-a-kind-of-death/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“American feminism has always had a puritanical strain, an imposed blindness to erotic truth.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/siri-hustvedt/american-feminism-has-always-had-a-puritanical-strain-an-imposed/) [Siri Hustvedt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/siri-hustvedt/) > [“Self-compassion can help us develop a healthier, more authentic way of relating to sex. First and foremost, by being supportive and nurturing toward our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristin-neff/self-compassion-can-help-us-develop-a-healthier-more-authentic-way-of/) [Kristin Neff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristin-neff/) > [“He props his elbow on the table, absently scratches his temple with his index finger, and I remember exactly what that index finger did…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/monica-murphy/he-props-his-elbow-on-the-table-absently-scratches-his-temple-with/) [Monica Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/monica-murphy/) > [The greatest sex toy ever invented may be the telephone. Sometimes there's nothing more erotic than a disembodied voice, no question more tantalizing than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meghan-daum/the-greatest-sex-toy-ever-invented-may-be-the-telephone-sometimes/) [Meghan Daum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meghan-daum/) > [When a lady's erotic life is vexed God knows what God is coming next.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ogden-nash/when-a-lady-s-erotic-life-is-vexed-god-knows-what-god-is-coming-next/) [Ogden Nash](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ogden-nash/) > [“Right, I can't watch this shit." Kacey grunted as he got up. "It's one thing getting a hard-on over you, baby girl. The fact…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-morgan/right-i-can-t-watch-this-shit-kacey-grunted-as-he-got-up-it-s-one/) [Elizabeth Morgan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-morgan/) > [Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-pratchett/just-erotic-nothing-kinky-it-s-the-difference-between-using-a-feather/) [Terry Pratchett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-pratchett/) > [I want to engage people in an honest, enlightened, and provocative conversation about the nature of erotic desire and the intricacies of intimacy and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/i-want-to-engage-people-in-an-honest-enlightened-and-provocative/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [The only people who are obsessed with food are anorexics and the morbidly obese. That, in erotic terms, is the Catholic church, in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-fry/the-only-people-who-are-obsessed-with-food-are-anorexics-and-the/) [Stephen Fry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-fry/) > [“I’m not going to deny that I want to fuck you. I can’t promise a future or that I’ll be some sniveling boyfriend who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/d-l-hess/i-m-not-going-to-deny-that-i-want-to-fuck-you-i-can-t-promise-a/) [D.L. Hess](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/d-l-hess/) > [The erotic and the art historical imagination is something that gets very little play when people talk about my work, and when they rarely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kehinde-wiley/the-erotic-and-the-art-historical-imagination-is-something-that-gets/) [Kehinde Wiley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kehinde-wiley/) > [The truly erotic sensibility, in evoking the image of woman, never omits to clothe it. The robing and disrobing: that is the true traffic…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antonio-machado/the-truly-erotic-sensibility-in-evoking-the-image-of-woman-never/) [Antonio Machado](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antonio-machado/) > [Shared laughter is erotic too.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marge-piercy/shared-laughter-is-erotic-too/) [Marge Piercy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marge-piercy/) ## More by Alison Bechdel > [Watching everyone root through their psyche, it just delights me. Especially R. Crumb's stuff.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/watching-everyone-root-through-their-psyche-it-just-delights-me/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [It's imprecise and insufficient, defining the homosexual as a person whose gender expression is at odds with his or her sex.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/it-s-imprecise-and-insufficient-defining-the-homosexual-as-a-person/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [The writing is hard, and the drawing is fun. It's very satisfying to see a drawing start to come together.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/the-writing-is-hard-and-the-drawing-is-fun-it-s-very-satisfying-to/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [Sometimes I wish the writing and drawing were more integrated.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/sometimes-i-wish-the-writing-and-drawing-were-more-integrated/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“My homosexuality remained at that point purely theoretical, an untested hypothesis. But it was a hypothesise so thorough and so convincing I saw no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/my-homosexuality-remained-at-that-point-purely-theoretical-an/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [Autobiographical comics, I love them. I love them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/autobiographical-comics-i-love-them-i-love-them/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [Partly I resented being perceived as weak because I was a girl.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/partly-i-resented-being-perceived-as-weak-because-i-was-a-girl/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“I put the odds on a psychic deathmatch between Attila the Hun and Virginia Woolf at fifty-fifty.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/i-put-the-odds-on-a-psychic-deathmatch-between-attila-the-hun-and/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [Basically, my work is play. It never actually feels that way - I'm always aiming to attain that state. But I get to do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/basically-my-work-is-play-it-never-actually-feels-that-way-i-m-always/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [What would happen if we spoke the truth?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/what-would-happen-if-we-spoke-the-truth/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [It was a vicious cycle, though. The more gratification we found in our own geniuses, the more isolated we grew.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/it-was-a-vicious-cycle-though-the-more-gratification-we-found-in-our/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“Then there were those famous wings. Was Daedalus really stricken with grief when Icarus fell into the sea? Or just disappointed by the design…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/then-there-were-those-famous-wings-was-daedalus-really-stricken-with/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“In this pause, I suddenly saw something very clearly. Whatever it was I wanted from my mother was simply not there to be had.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/in-this-pause-i-suddenly-saw-something-very-clearly-whatever-it-was-i/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [People really want to think that these things really happened. I don't know why that is important, but I know that when I finish…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/people-really-want-to-think-that-these-things-really-happened-i-don-t/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) > [“It's said, after all, that people reach middle age the day they realize they're never going to read Remembrance of Things Past.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/it-s-said-after-all-that-people-reach-middle-age-the-day-they-realize/) [Alison Bechdel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) [Explore all 93 Alison Bechdel quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/) ## More Death quotes > [“He wondered how it was fair that your dying should depend so much on when you were born.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/he-wondered-how-it-was-fair-that-your-dying-should-depend-so-much-on/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [What sets worlds in motion is the interplay of differences, their attractions and repulsions. Life is plurality, death is uniformity. By suppressing differences and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/octavio-paz/what-sets-worlds-in-motion-is-the-interplay-of-differences-their/) [Octavio Paz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/octavio-paz/) > [Most of us are convinced that we are our egos, which is who we think we are. The ego is part of our incarnation.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ram-dass/most-of-us-are-convinced-that-we-are-our-egos-which-is-who-we-think/) [Ram Dass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ram-dass/) > [I do not want to live at the cost of the life even of a snake. I should let him bite me to death…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mahatma-gandhi/i-do-not-want-to-live-at-the-cost-of-the-life-even-of-a-snake-i/) [Mahatma Gandhi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mahatma-gandhi/) > [“It was beautiful. He thought he had never seen anything so beautiful in all his life; that, having seen it, he could die content,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mira-grant/it-was-beautiful-he-thought-he-had-never-seen-anything-so-beautiful/) [Mira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mira-grant/) > [Retirement? You're talking about death, right?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-altman/retirement-you-re-talking-about-death-right/) [Robert Altman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-altman/) > [With multiplayer, permanent death, and an ever-changing world to explore and conquer, 'A Valley Without Wind' might be the place you're looking for if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-manuel/with-multiplayer-permanent-death-and-an-ever-changing-world-to/) [Rob Manuel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-manuel/) > [“What did you see?” she asked gently. His brow furrowed, as if he could not understand the question. Then his eyes turned to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-anthony-torino/what-did-you-see-she-asked-gently-his-brow-furrowed-as-if-he-could/) J. Anthony Torino > [Those whose life is long still strive for gain, and for all mortals all things take second place to money.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophocles/those-whose-life-is-long-still-strive-for-gain-and-for-all-mortals/) [Sophocles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophocles/) > [“I practice Dying--every night-- But have not learned to, still-- Though Talented--by Mortal bones-- For such a common Skill.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-w-powers/i-practice-dying-every-night-but-have-not-learned-to-still-though/) Alan W. Powers > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [I am not a depressive person at all, but I reflect a lot on my life, and life in general, from the perspective of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alejandro-gonzalez-inarritu/i-am-not-a-depressive-person-at-all-but-i-reflect-a-lot-on-my-life/) [Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alejandro-gonzalez-inarritu/) > [“Death is a reality that calls the rest of life and all of our assorted strivings into sharp relief.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/craig-d-lounsbrough/death-is-a-reality-that-calls-the-rest-of-life-and-all-of-our/) [Craig D. Lounsbrough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/craig-d-lounsbrough/) > [I love life. I love life to death.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emmanuelle-riva/i-love-life-i-love-life-to-death/) [Emmanuelle Riva](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emmanuelle-riva/) > [I think when you’re dying you start looking for important things in the corners. You can’t let anything that seems even semi-important pass, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-crutcher/i-think-when-you-re-dying-you-start-looking-for-important-things-in/) [Chris Crutcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-crutcher/) [Browse all 39,127 Death quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/death/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth could have a cumulative renunciatory effect. Sexual shame is in itself a kind of death.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Alison Bechdel" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-one-s-erotic-truth-could-have/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Death" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-one-s-erotic-truth-could-have/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fb/alison-bechdel-7240_death_i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-o_3155156.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I suppose that a lifetime spent hiding one's erotic truth could have a cumulative renunciatory effect…” — Alison Bechdel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Alison Bechdel", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-bechdel/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I suppose that a lifetime spent...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-one-s-erotic-truth-could-have/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-bechdel/i-suppose-that-a-lifetime-spent-hiding-one-s-erotic-truth-could-have/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```