--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The child has a primary need to be…" description: "\"The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and as the center - the central actor - in his ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png" --- # The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected… ![“The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and as the center - the central actor - in his own activity.” quote by Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png) > “The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and as the center - the central actor - in his own activity.” [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Children need to be seen and respected as authentic individuals, central to their own actions. **In simple terms:** Kids must be recognized as they truly are. Key Takeaway Respect and acknowledge children's true selves. Themes respect authenticity development Mood empathetic reflective Type advice psychological When to use this quote - parenting - education - therapy - child counseling Key Concepts psychology humanistic selfhood Questions to Reflect On - How do you currently acknowledge a child's authentic self? - What barriers prevent seeing the child as central? A Different Perspective Children may resist or misinterpret respect, leading to dependency. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Actors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/actors/) [Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Respect](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/respect/) [Theatre](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/theatre/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) ## Related quotes > [If you know what it is before you even start, it's not as interesting. Central to being an actor is pretending, and the adventure…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/willem-dafoe/if-you-know-what-it-is-before-you-even-start-it-s-not-as-interesting/) [Willem Dafoe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/willem-dafoe/) > [When I would lose matches, I fully respected the person who beat me, because they beat me. I can't blame anybody.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-degrasse-tyson/when-i-would-lose-matches-i-fully-respected-the-person-who-beat-me/) [Neil deGrasse Tyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-degrasse-tyson/) > [Prayer is not one of the many things the community does. Rather, it is its very beingBut when prayer is no longer its primary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henri-nouwen/prayer-is-not-one-of-the-many-things-the-community-does-rather-it-is/) [Henri Nouwen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henri-nouwen/) > [No one can take culture seriously if he believes that it is only the uppermost of several layers of epiphenomena resting on a primary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-m-weaver/no-one-can-take-culture-seriously-if-he-believes-that-it-is-only-the/) [Richard M. Weaver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-m-weaver/) > [The primary danger of the television screen lies not so much in the behavior it produces as the behavior it prevents-the talks, the games,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/urie-bronfenbrenner/the-primary-danger-of-the-television-screen-lies-not-so-much-in-the/) [Urie Bronfenbrenner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/urie-bronfenbrenner/) > [The philosophy that I have worked under most of my life is that the serious study of natural history is an activity which has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roger-tory-peterson/the-philosophy-that-i-have-worked-under-most-of-my-life-is-that-the/) [Roger Tory Peterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roger-tory-peterson/) > [Modern anthropology ... opposes the utilitarian assumption that the primitive chants as he sows seed because he believes that otherwise it will not grow,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-carroll/modern-anthropology-opposes-the-utilitarian-assumption-that-the/) [John Carroll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-carroll/) > [There are plenty of people I've seen and thought that person is funny, or that person is really talented, and they've got something, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wyatt-cenac/there-are-plenty-of-people-i-ve-seen-and-thought-that-person-is-funny/) [Wyatt Cenac](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wyatt-cenac/) > [A person with lower grades, kick out, repeater, have lot's of vice are the person who you can really trust. Because they are real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-person-with-lower-grades-kick-out-repeater-have-lot-s-of-vice-are/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The person who really LOVES you sees what a mess you can be, how moody you can get, how hard you are to handle.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/unkown/the-person-who-really-loves-you-sees-what-a-mess-you-can-be-how-moody/) Unkown > [“She was the only one left, and she was real. To be the only one, and to know that you are real - that's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-bloch/she-was-the-only-one-left-and-she-was-real-to-be-the-only-one-and-to/) [Robert Bloch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-bloch/) > [One person really can make a difference. Each person is the revolution.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/one-person-really-can-make-a-difference-each-person-is-the-revolution/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Always remember, the person we’re really working for is the person who’s restoring the piece a hundred years from now. He’s the one we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donna-tartt/always-remember-the-person-we-re-really-working-for-is-the-person-who/) [Donna Tartt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donna-tartt/) > [Sometimes the person you really need is the one you didnt think you wanted.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-the-person-you-really-need-is-the-one-you-didnt-think-you/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I hadn't known anything else, other than being an artist, and I needed to be a person for a while, really get to know…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tove-styrke/i-hadn-t-known-anything-else-other-than-being-an-artist-and-i-needed/) [Tove Styrke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tove-styrke/) ## More by Alice Miller > [Almost everywhere we find . . . the use of various coercive measures, to rid ourselves as quickly as possible of the child withinus--i.e.,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/almost-everywhere-we-find-the-use-of-various-coercive-measures-to-rid/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [Wherever I look, I see signs of the commandment to honor one's parents and nowhere of a commandment that calls for the respect of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/wherever-i-look-i-see-signs-of-the-commandment-to-honor-one-s-parents/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [The art of not experiencing feelings. A child can experience her feelings only when there is somebody there who accepts her fully, understands her,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-art-of-not-experiencing-feelings-a-child-can-experience-her/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [Disrespect is the weapon of the weak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/disrespect-is-the-weapon-of-the-weak/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [“Even if one ultimately risks losing all contact with oneself and merely functioning as a mask, an "as if" personality, there are always drugs,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/even-if-one-ultimately-risks-losing-all-contact-with-oneself-and/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [“Thus he spent his whole life searching for his own truth, but it remained hidden to him because he had learned at a very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/thus-he-spent-his-whole-life-searching-for-his-own-truth-but-it/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [“Most people do exactly the opposite. Without realizing that the past is constantly determining their present actions, they avoid learning anything about their history.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/most-people-do-exactly-the-opposite-without-realizing-that-the-past/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [People who, as children, were intellectually far beyond their parents and therefore admired by them, but who also therefore had to solve their own…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/people-who-as-children-were-intellectually-far-beyond-their-parents/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [Parents are indeed capable of routinely torturing their children without anyone interceding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/parents-are-indeed-capable-of-routinely-torturing-their-children/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [Ultimately the body will rebel. Even if it can be temporarily pacified with the help of drugs, cigarettes or medicine, it usually has the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/ultimately-the-body-will-rebel-even-if-it-can-be-temporarily-pacified/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [For some years now, there has been proof that the devastating effects of the traumatization of children take their inevitable tollon society--a fact that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/for-some-years-now-there-has-been-proof-that-the-devastating-effects/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [“The older we get, the more difficult it is to find other people who can give us the love our parents denied us. But…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-older-we-get-the-more-difficult-it-is-to-find-other-people-who/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [It is very difficult for people to believe the simple fact that every persecutor was once a victim. Yet it should be very obvious…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/it-is-very-difficult-for-people-to-believe-the-simple-fact-that-every/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [We don't yet know, above all, what the world might be like if children were to grow up without being subjected to humiliation, if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/we-don-t-yet-know-above-all-what-the-world-might-be-like-if-children/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [Good manners are the technique of expressing considerations for the feelings of others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/good-manners-are-the-technique-of-expressing-considerations-for-the/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) [Explore all 120 Alice Miller quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) ## More Activity quotes > [Where I grew up, learning was a collective activity. But when I got to school and tried to share learning with other students that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-giroux/where-i-grew-up-learning-was-a-collective-activity-but-when-i-got-to/) [Henry Giroux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-giroux/) > [It must be assumed and established as a principle, that the right of private property must be regarded as sacred. Wherefore, the law ought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-leo-xiii/it-must-be-assumed-and-established-as-a-principle-that-the-right-of/) [Pope Leo XIII](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-leo-xiii/) > [Each man is capable of doing one thing well. If he attempts several, he will fail to achieve distinction in any.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/plato/each-man-is-capable-of-doing-one-thing-well-if-he-attempts-several-he/) [Plato](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/plato/) > [And also I think the rise of other, you could say, destinations for international jihadis mean that Pakistan isn't necessarily the place where people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohsin-hamid/and-also-i-think-the-rise-of-other-you-could-say-destinations-for/) [Mohsin Hamid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohsin-hamid/) > [To evoke in oneself a feeling one has once experienced, and having evoked it in oneself, then by means of movements, lines, colors, sounds,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-tolstoy/to-evoke-in-oneself-a-feeling-one-has-once-experienced-and-having/) [Leo Tolstoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-tolstoy/) > [Fighting's fun, man. It's a great activity, it's a great sport.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matt-mitrione/fighting-s-fun-man-it-s-a-great-activity-it-s-a-great-sport/) [Matt Mitrione](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matt-mitrione/) > [There were books everywhere in my house. Books were very present. I just loved books. I never understood reading as anything but a pleasurable…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-lucas/there-were-books-everywhere-in-my-house-books-were-very-present-i/) [Lisa Lucas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-lucas/) > [For war to man, like childbirth to women, is simplifying in its emotions and activities. All the real problems of life can be put…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pearl-s-buck/for-war-to-man-like-childbirth-to-women-is-simplifying-in-its/) [Pearl S. Buck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pearl-s-buck/) > [The only activity a cynic will find contagious is yawning, that is, with other people, at other people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/criss-jami/the-only-activity-a-cynic-will-find-contagious-is-yawning-that-is/) [Criss Jami](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/criss-jami/) > [For the longest time, neuroscientists were forced to be passive observers of brain activity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gero-miesenbock/for-the-longest-time-neuroscientists-were-forced-to-be-passive/) Gero Miesenbock > [Enjoyment is not a goal, it is a feeling that accompanies important ongoing activity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-goodman/enjoyment-is-not-a-goal-it-is-a-feeling-that-accompanies-important/) [Paul Goodman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-goodman/) > [Once an activity has been socialized, it is impossible to point out, by concrete example, how men in a free market could better conduct…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leonard-read/once-an-activity-has-been-socialized-it-is-impossible-to-point-out-by/) [Leonard Read](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leonard-read/) > [“Fun is not an activity, it is a state of mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bryant-mcgill/fun-is-not-an-activity-it-is-a-state-of-mind/) [Bryant McGill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bryant-mcgill/) > [I have to consider everything I eat; I consider every activity I do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-kimball/i-have-to-consider-everything-i-eat-i-consider-every-activity-i-do/) [Charlie Kimball](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-kimball/) > [Almost all good businesses engage in 'pain today, gain tomorrow' activities.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-munger/almost-all-good-businesses-engage-in-pain-today-gain-tomorrow/) [Charlie Munger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-munger/) Browse all 3,263 Activity quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and as the center - the central actor - in his own activity.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Alice Miller" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regarded-and-respected-as-the/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Activity" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regarded-and-respected-as-the/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f0/alice-miller-3713_activity_the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regar_465110.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The child has a primary need to be regarded and respected as the person he really is at any given time, and…” — Alice Miller", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Alice Miller", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "The child has a primary need...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regarded-and-respected-as-the/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/the-child-has-a-primary-need-to-be-regarded-and-respected-as-the/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```